Chapter Text
Somewhere in Nevada…
A military-grade truck sped down the desolate desert of Nevada, occasionally running over a rock or crack in the ground, jostling the occupants of the car: The hook wielding Sanford, the cigarette-smoking Deimos, and the neigh immortal Hank J. Wimbleton. Sanford sat behind the steering wheel, his foot pressing the gas pedal to the floor, while Deimos sat beside him with a pair of binoculars in his hands, and Hank stood in the trunk, using the mounted machine gun to mow down other military vehicles that were chasing them down.
After Hank successfully totaled a few of them, a sniper leaned out of one of the armored cars and shot one of the tires of the truck just as it began to approach a nearby mountain. Sanford tried to regain control of the truck, but his efforts were in vain as the truck threatened to tumble out of control. Hank grabbed onto his two friends and leaped out of the car before rolling and covering them with his body. The truck tumbled and bounced over the three of them before exploding against the foot of the mountain, destroying a sign planted there years ago.
The three were now left on foot as the cars encircled them, and dozens of agents carrying guns stepped out of the cars. Hank, unphased by this, pulled out a pair of SMGs, while Sanford and Deimos pressed their backs against his. Sanford drew a handgun and a hook attached to a spring-wound string that Deimos made, while Deimos himself pulled out an assault rifle with a grenade launcher attachment. The trio began mowing down the agents one by one. Hank fired in all directions, never missing a single shot, while Sanford and Deimos ducked and weaved to avoid getting shot.
Eventually, the three managed to wipe out the entire squad, but the battle was not over with that onslaught. Soon, two semi-trucks arrived carrying shipping crates. Agents came to open them, releasing six towering giants known as MAG Agents, each carrying equally enormous weapons. This made the trio of outlaws worried. Together, they could maybe take on two Mag Agents, but six?! Borderline impossible. So, rather than fighting them head-on, the three chose to run for the mountain in hopes of escaping the Mag Agents.
Hank shot one of them a few times to distract them while Deimos and Sanford ran off. The Mag Agent slammed his massive machete onto the ground, but Hank dodged out of the way, then climbed onto and leaped off of the titanic blade, landing on the agent’s face and proceeding to stab it several times, before dodging the blast of a second agent’s gigantic shotgun, which blew off the agent’s face. He then ran after his friends while two more agents gave chase.
Hank soon caught up with Sanford and Deimos, and the three of them quickly scaled the side of the mountain, Hank constantly watching their backs as they continued to scale the mountain. Their pace quickened when they heard the thunderous footsteps of the Mag Agents who stomped towards them. Hank soon saw a shotgun tip peek out from behind a tree and pushed against a boulder with all his might, shielding Sanford and Deimos before jumping behind it himself. The Mag Agent’s cannon of a shotgun blasted the boulder into pebbles, prompting them to run once again while the giant reloaded. The trio sprinted up the mountain as quickly as they could, now constantly avoiding attacks, before suddenly reaching a flattened-out area with nowhere further to climb up. The area was overgrown with vines and trees, and at the edge of it lay a hole that led deep beneath the mountain.
They didn’t really have anywhere else to go but down, so they looked at eachother, asking back and forth who would go first before Sanford suggested they play Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide it. With a play of rock, rock, scissors, Deimos was the first to jump down into the pit. However, before the two remaining friends could decide who would go next, the Mag Agent pursuing them arrived. Hank quickly shoved Sanford into the pit before jumping onto the giant, climbing on his back, and stabbing his neck over and over again. The Mag Agent reached onto his back, trying to get Hank off, but in doing so, he ended up stumbling and tripping into the hole with Hank still on him. And so, Hank, Sanford, and Deimos all took the plunge into the underground. The other Mag Agent confirmed that Hank had fallen back to his boss, and then climbed down the mountain, thinking the mission was successful.
And so our story begins...
Somewhere below Nevada...
Sanford awoke to something unexpected. He expected to awake in a pool of his own blood due to the enormous fall that he had just been through, most likely to die soon after, all the while regretting his decision. But instead, he awoke on a bed of golden flowers, the first he had seen in years. He took a moment to breathe in their sweet smell and shuddered, before hearing someone groaning next to him.
“Deimos? You alright man?” Sanford asked while Deimos was slipping his hat back on.
“Yeah, I’m good. I think.” Deimos then looked around at the dark, cavernous walls surrounding the place, and then looked up and saw the hole that they had fallen through, looking more like a tiny speck in the sky. “Did we just survive a several hundred-meter fall unscathed?”
The two then heard a loud grunt coming from nearby. They turned around and saw the corpse of a Mag Agent, whose head was being lifted up by Hank. Hank then nodded in response to Deimos’ question while leaning against the corpse.
“Neat,” Deimos said. He then pulled out a cigarette and his lighter and took a quick puff.
“You’re not the least bit phased by that?” Sanford asked.
“After all the giants, zombies, androids, and reality benders we’ve faced? This is nothing!”
They then began laughing, including Hank, making Deimos and Sanford smile.
“Hey, you know what? This is probably the first time that we’ve been able to just…” Sanford flopped onto his back with a smile on his face. “Relax.”
Deimos chuckled. “Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but right now, we need to find a place to hide out until we know we’re safe.”
Deimos sighed and got up, and the three then got out of the open. There was only one path out of the area they were in, so that’s where they went. They happened upon a field of pristine, green grass. They did not question how the grass was there, figuring that it was a lingering side effect of an improbability drive. What caught Sanford and Deimos’ eyes was a massive, purple door at the end of this field of grass. However, what caught Hank’s attention was something digging underground before suddenly popping up in front of them.
It was a flower, very similar to the ones that the trio landed upon. The difference between those flowers and the flower that popped up in front of them was that this flower had a face. Two beady little eyes, and a big, happy smile. Its expression was… worrying for Hank. The last time he saw something this cartoonishly happy, it tried to bludgeon him to death. Not to mention, there was something off about how it just kept bobbing up and down repeatedly. What made all three of them even more surprised was when they started talking in a sweet, welcoming, high-pitched voice.
“Howdy!” It said, “I’m Flowey! Flowey the flower! Say… you’re new here, arencha’? Golly! You must be so confused! Well, lucky for you, your good… friend…” Hank, already tired of this, walked right past Flowey, with Sanford and Deimos following closely behind. This made Flowey quite upset.
“Hey! I’m talking to you!” But the three kept walking.
Seeing that he wouldn’t be able to stop them by keeping up the friendly act, a sinister grin suddenly stretched across his face.
Suddenly, Hank, Sanford, and Deimos were blocked off by a wall of little white pellets. When Deimos tried to touch one of the pellets, he reeled back from a sudden jolt of pain and saw that his finger was bleeding.
“Let’s try this again. I’m Flowey, and you three idiots are going to die down here!” Flowey then began laughing maniacally, but his laughter was cut off by Hank suddenly shooting him in the face, causing him to fall backward and the pellets to disappear.
“Nice move, Hank.”
Hank nodded with a soft grunt before the two moved on, opening a large set of doors and entering into the ruins.
The three walked through the mysterious, magenta brick halls until they were eventually greeted by an ornate set of stairs leading up to the slightly ajar door to the next room. The railing on the stairs was gripped tightly by vines, and the walls were caked in moss. It all gave off the impression as though no one had lived here for the longest time. And yet, all of the torches mounted on the walls were lit, which made all of this especially strange for them.
Entering the next room, the three found themselves at a shut door with six pressure plates arranged nearby. Clearly, this was some sort of puzzle, so they looked around for any clues as to what to do in this room. Sanford found a note on the wall and read it out loud to the others.
“Only the fearless may proceed. Brave ones, foolish ones, both not walk the middle road…”
The puzzle was easy for them to solve from there. Hit all four outer buttons in the right order and then move on. The next room featured an even more trivial puzzle. Switches lined the walls with arrows drawn around them that pointed to the ones to flick. Same with the next, simply requiring them to push a rock on a switch. However, when they got to the next room and were offered a similar puzzle to the last, but with three rocks, one for each to push, something strange happened when Deimos tried to push the rock he went for.
“WOAH THERE BUDDY! Who said you could push me around?” The rock shouted at him.
“Aaaand the rock talks too.”
“Does it have a face and homicidal tendencies?” Sanford asked. Deimos looked all over the rock.
“No face. You don’t wanna kill me, do you?”
“‘Course not! I jus’ don’t much appreciate bein’ pushed around by some random guy!”
“Well, sorry. I didn’t realize you were sentient like that flower.”
“Ya mean Flowey?” The rock said with a tinge of disgust in his voice. “That lil’ devil ain’t nothin’ but trouble, I tell you what! Y’all best stay away from him.”
“Okay?” Deimos said, completely baffled that he was having this conversation to begin with. “So… could you maybe move over onto that button over there so we can get across that bridge?” Deimos asked while pointing to a bridge that was blocked by spikes.
“Sho thin’.” The rock then slid over to the button, causing the spikes to fall. “Y’all take care out there!”
“Uh… you too?” The three then walked off. As they left, the rock was left shocked when he saw their backs, seeing that they were armed to the teeth. He couldn't imagine why, and quite frankly, didn’t want to imagine why.
The rest of the puzzles went by smoothly, and all the while, they wondered why, despite there clearly being signs of someone living here, no one seemed to be around. Unbeknownst to them, all the other monsters, the residents of the ruins, had seen what Hank had done to Flowey. Such uncaring violence frightened them so much that they avoided getting in their way at all costs, instead choosing to hide and pray that they wouldn’t be found and killed.
Eventually, the trio came upon a long and empty hallway with only a single pillar behind it. Hank had a strong feeling that this was a trap and ran at the pillar while pulling out a shotgun. He stopped and aimed at anyone behind it, and sure enough, there was someone hiding there. An older woman, seemingly a sort of anthropomorphic goat, was cowering behind the pillar, and when Hank aimed his shotgun at her, she immediately began panicking and backed up against the wall next to her.
“P-please, I don’t w-want any trouble!” She stuttered and shivered. “I saw what happened outside, and I promise you, I am not like him! P-please, don’t hurt me!”
“What’s going on here?” Deimos and Sanford soon came to Hank’s side, who still had the goat woman at gunpoint.
“Please, just put your gun down. I mean you three no harm.”
Hank looked at Sanford, who, after mulling it over in his head, nodded. Hank lowered his shotgun and backed up, but kept it out just in case. The woman sighed in relief and supported herself against the pillar.
“Thank you. M-my name is Toriel. Who are you three?”
“Sanford.”
“Deimos.” He then pointed to their burly mute comrade, “And that’s Hank.”
After taking all this in, Toriel began to observe the three of them more closely and noticed all the bandages wrapped around each of them. Deimos and Sanford’s heads, Deimos’ bicep, Sanford’s torso, and Hank’s practically mummified body. Toriel let out a sympathetic sigh upon making these observations.
“Oh, you poor things…” Toriel grasped at the nearest hand, which just so happened to be that of Deimos. “Please, come with me. I can help mend your wounds.”
The four soon arrived at one final door, an old tree with bright red leaves standing tall before it. She opened the door and cordially invited the three inside. The house had a calm and inviting atmosphere. The walls and floors were painted a muted shade of yellow, contrasting the bright purple color that comprised the rest of the ruins. The whole place was also quite pristine and well-kept, contrasting the untidiness and overgrowth spread throughout the ruins. Stepping into this house was like stepping into another world for a second time. They also caught a whiff of a sweet scent resonating throughout the house.
“I have a butterscotch cinnamon pie baking in the oven. Would you three like some?”
They all nodded, having not had a good-tasting meal in a while, mostly surviving off of MREs and canned food, so a fresh, home-baked pie would be a nice change of pace. Soon, said pie was ready and three slices were served up, one for each of them.
“Hey, how’d you even cook this without electricity?” Sanford asked while Toriel took a seat in a chair by a fireplace.
“Oh, I did so using fire magic.” Toriel then created a small ember at the tip of her finger and tossed it into the fireplace, setting it alight. All three were amazed by this.
“Woah! How did you do that?”
“What? You mean you don’t know about magic?”
“I mean, I’ve heard of it, but I never believed all that Wizardry stuff was real.”
“Well, wizards are a rare exception, but in general, only Monsters are able to use magic. Humans instead have a variety of different powers in their souls.”
“Souls? Really?” Deimos said, still in disbelief.
“Fine. Let me show you.” Toriel then closed her eyes and used her magic to show off every soul in the room, as well as the corresponding stats. Sanford, Deimos, and Hank were all startled when they saw little multicolored hearts appear in front of their chests, Sanford’s being Cyan, Deimos’ being Yellow, and Hank’s being Purple. Toriel then stood up and showed them hers, which was white and upside down.
“These are our souls. They are the things that make us what we are. Monster souls are all white like mine, as our souls use magic. Human souls however are composed of one of seven defining traits, which makes their souls much more hearty and durable.”
Deimos placed a hand on his head. “This is all just so much to take in! I just… wow.” Toriel then grasped Deimos’ hand gently.
“I know it may seem hard to comprehend. You seem to have come from a world where the concepts of magic and souls have been lost to history, wrapped up in folktales and fiction, but I assure you, all of these things are indeed very real.”
Deimos took a deep breath. “Hooh! Okay, I’m good.”
“Wonderful. Now, I-” Toriel stopped however when she took a look at each of their LVs (Levels of Violence). What she saw horrified her once more.
Sanford: LV. 313
Deimos: LV. 291
Hank: LV. 797
“Toriel? Is something wrong?” Deimos asked.
“H-hugh? Oh, y-yes, I’m fine.” She then hid everyone’s souls again. “I think that’s enough talking about souls for today. Please, enjoy your pie.”
And enjoy the pie they did. Indeed, it was so good that it brought tears to their eyes as they ate it. Well, all except Hank, who didn’t even bother eating his piece. Sanford and Deimos savored every bite of pie in sheer bliss. Eventually, while they were eating, a door creaked open and a child in a striped sweater walked out. They weren’t fully awake, still having their eyes shut upon coming out, but they were awake enough to walk around and talk.
“M-mom? Who are these people?”
“Oh, my child, you’re awake!” Toriel took the child’s hands and introduced them and the men to each other. “Boys, this is Frisk. Frisk, these three men just fell into the underground. This is Deimos, this is Sanford, and this is-”
Hank suddenly stood up and walked over to Frisk. He then took a knee before them, and Frisk finally opened their eyes, allowing their sparkling, green, youthful eyes to meet with the red goggles of the towering, black-coated, bandage-wrapped masked man, who handed them his slice of pie and, much to the surprise of his friends, managed to grumble out a word.
“Hank…”
Frisk took the slice of pie and then looked back up at him. “You don’t talk much, do you?”
Hank shook his head.
“It’s okay. I don’t talk much either.” Frisk then held out their palm to Hank. “My name's Frisk. Wanna be friends?”
Hank then reached out to reciprocate the gesture, gently shaking the tiny child’s hand, his enormous hand engulfing Frisk’s. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to anyone, a fifth human was watching from beyond the grave, having been following Frisk for the longest time. An ethereal teenage girl with a red glow surrounding her body.
‘Hank hugh? He’s an adult human, and they’re usually the worst of the humans…’ She then looked down at Frisk. ‘And I already know the kind of damage a little kid can do.’
Damn, that’s crazy!