Archive of Our Own ^beta

Stress was gardening outside her house.
It wouldn't be that weird a sight, especially if she had a garden out there, but Iskall and False were still watching from afar.

"Is she just- watering the grass?!" he hissed, leaning over the edge of the top of Stress' base. Bit of a risky place to watch her from, but, eh. They'd met up here, so why move? "Stress, you have a garden right there! Like, an honest-to-goodness one!"
"I- I don't know what she's doing," False admitted. "She's just- she's not even singing! What's gotten into her!"

How- how hadn't he realized-?!
Stress was just down there, just- watering absolutely nothing like she was being paid minimum wage to! No- even then, she'd be animated!

She looked straight up.
Her friends went to pose more mischievously so they wouldn't look completely weird-

Her eyes were a bit too focused, and- something was off with her flower crown. He couldn't quite place it, but it just- it wasn't right.
She didn't wave, didn't shield her eyes from the sun, didn't change expression- anything. She just stared.

What could they do but stare back? 
"Maybe- maybe she'll react if we fly off?" False did not sound sure of herself. She never really did, but this was worse than usual. "Rockets are kind of startling."
"Mine aren't!" He flexed an arm, almost toppling over. Their friend still didn't react.
"What if I-?"

She took out her bow, shooting Stress between the eyes.
Stress stumbled back.
Her face filled with rage for one moment, before she regained her composure and went back to staring. The blood leaking from her wound did not look as iridescent as Stress' tended to be.

The two Hermits on her roof looked at each other again.
"That's not-" he opened his mouth semi-uselessly. "-her, is it?" Oh, not uselessly after all!
"I don't think so." False looked a bit distant. She better have been the real her! "... We should leave. Talk this over somewhere, maybe?"
"Sounds good."

He spared the strange figure one glance as he flew away, and he saw her 'gardening' again.

They landed in the shopping district, near that awful portal. It seemed to be pretty empty, but there were probably people closer to shops than to the center. Still strange to not see anyone at Cleo's.

Iskall sat down on the grass. "What on Earth-?!"
"I don't know," False agreed, sitting down next to him.
"Who- who's online?" He took out his comm, and the first thing it showed him was the most recent message in chat, from a minute or so ago:

> Stressmonster101 left the game.

"I don't think that'll help us, then." She sighed.
"Hm." He ran his fingers through the (unwatered, presumably) grass, ripping some chunks out. "Why were the- the- center-bits?- of her flower crown... flowers?- yellow?"
"Oh, yeah. They aren't normally, are they?" Thank goodness she could understand that sentence, he did not know the English words for anything he talked about in it. "They're, like, cyan?"
"Yeah." Another word he would not have remembered.
"... Should we tell someone?"
"Well, we gotta, right?" The list of online players might not have been a hundred percent accurate, but, y'know, it was a list of Hermits who might have been online. "Uh, Xisuma? He's not far. Would he know what's going on?"
"Maybe. Either he'd already have a farm based around it, or he wouldn't know a thing," she reasoned. "However, he's also not far from Stress, and is very easy to dress up as. I've done it myself."
"Mm. Not him, then."

They fell into a bit of a silence, before Iskall broke it. "Have you experienced anything like this? I mean, some stuff in Vault Hunters is kind of similar, but, like... that didn't seem like a kind of mob AI. Was that just a weird prank?"
"Maybe it is a prank, you're right." She tore up a bit of grass as well. Her poor gloves.

There was a figure in the distance- kind of looked like Pearl?

"That's someone we could talk to!" False stood up.
He followed suit, waving the other Hermit over. "Yeah! Maybe she's secretly an expert on your friends suddenly losing their minds, or something."
"Let's hope."

Pearl was approaching much more sheepishly than he knew her to- but, granted, they were also next to her... creation. Iskall didn't approach his work of collaborative art very confidentially back before it was lettering.

"Pearl!" He waved as she finally got into earshot. "We've got something we need your help with!"
"My help, eh?" She jogged the rest of the distance. "What- what are ya workin' on?"
"Stress is acting weird, do you know why?"
She turned as far away from the portal as she could. Her hair seemed to be shorter than normal in the back, or at least it looked it while she turned. "What do you mean by that? What kinda weird?"
"I just- I don't think it's her? Like the haircut, by the way."
She seemed... caught off-guard by that? Did she forget, or was- "Thanks! And do you think Stress was replaced, or something?"
"I hope she's still out there, but it don't think that was her in front of her house," he said conversationally enough. "It's hard to trust anyone now. Like, how do I know you're you?"
False opened her comm. "'PearlescentMoon joined the game,' just a bit after Stress left. Might not be her then, yeah."

'Pearl' took out a sword-
She swung at False, with rather good form-
False dodged.
The impersonator fell to the ground.
They tried to reach for her ankles-
She kicked them away, and they turned into- something? Their body kneaded itself like clay, before disappearing into the grass. He couldn't see what they became very well. A snake in the grass, maybe- and scuttled away.

She stared blankly at where 'Pearl' was. "Whatever's doing this is violent? That's- that's not good."
"What even- okay, so they can shapeshift. We've learned that." He looked through the grass for anything moving, even if it was just a bug or something. "I mean, we could've probably figured, but it's nice to know for sure."
"Yeah." They were spending a lot of today staring at the grass.

A Doc ended up walking past them, oddly carefully.

"Hey, Doc!" Iskall waved. "Have you seen anything weird lately?"
"Like- like what?" he asked, and oh, there was something wrong-
"Like stores that charge sand," the real Hermit lied.
All he got in response was a glower. Not even picking a fight-?

Login time lined up with him being a fake. Okay. At least figuring it out was getting easier.

"Xisuma! Thank you for coming!" False waved him over.
"Of course, of course." 
"Do you have any idea what's going on with any clone business, or whatever?"
"I believe I'm quite familiar with clone business," he replied unconvincingly.
Iskall sighed deeply. "Are you the real one?"
"Yeah?" The act was slipping badly. "I think I was talking to False, anyway." He turned towards her, stealthily pulling out a sword-

She knocked him over, just like the 'Pearl'.
"They hate you, don't they?" Iskall watched this one writhe as well.

There was- a second Doc?
He was having an animated conversation with a Ren in front of the wood shop.

False checked her comm. "He logged in before 'Xisuma'."
"Are you sure that's not the fake one you're thinking of?" Iskall leaned over her shoulder.
"'Docm77 left,' 'Docm77 joined.' I think he's real."

They walked over to the other pair, hoping to look non-threatening.
"Hey, Doc," Iskall said casually. "Notice anything weird lately?"
"What?" was his only response. Fair.
"Wh- you're just ignoring me?" Ren looked between them.
False ignored him, presumably just for the time being. "Like, have you seen someone who doesn't seem like themself?"
Doc paused, his companion looking between them even more hastily. "I think I have."
"Who?" Ren stopped and looked at Doc.
"I think you and your 'GigaLogs Corp' space suit know who."
"Do you want to talk about this in, uh..." Iskall looked around. "Cleo's cafe?"
"Of all places?" Doc sighed. "Sure."

They got themselves settled- the Ren'd just turn into something else, and they'd just deal with them later. For now, they got themselves some overpriced drinks and cheap books, and sat down in the corner.

"Okay, here's what we know:" Iskall began, taking a swig of his coffee. Very pumpkin-y. "There's some kind of shapeshifter who only mostly knows how we act. They don't replace their victims, as we saw you, and they simulate the victims going on- and off-line."
Doc rubbed his temples. "How do you know I'm real?"
"The logging on and off thing! You came on after the fake left."
"Do you think both the fake and the real Hermit can be on at the same time?" He drummed the fingers of his other hand on the table.
"Probably." Maybe putting coffee in a carved pumpkin wasn't the best idea. "Do you have any experience with this kind of thing?"
"No? I can't say I've had a friend be replaced before."
"False- you didn't answer this earlier, I'm realizing. Do you?"

She looked up from her tea like a deer in headlights. "Well... um- a bit?"
"'A bit'? Can you elaborate?" Iskall hoped he wasn't coming off as rude, even though he definitely was.
"My- my sister- did I ever tell you guys about her?"

The door swung open with the chime of a bell.
In walked the 'Ren'.
He took off his sunglasses, his hair grew, his features changed-
Iskall couldn't help but feel as if the figure was reverting into False. This wasn't like with the 'Pearl' becoming the snake or whatever; everything eased into place like long hair being let down and settling around the shoulders.

They walked over to the table the three were sitting at-

"I'm sorry, False. For everything," they began, taking out a sword. "I- I hope you are too."
False stayed in-the-headlights as the sword went through her chest, leaving her slumped over on the table. Her blood was the same color as that of the imitations, that kind of almost-natural red.
The assailant took one last- almost mournful?- look at its victim, before tearing what looked like a mini Rift out of the wall with some modded tool, and stepping in.

Iskall and Doc just stared. What else were they meant to do?
They finished their drinks as their friend bled out on the table, waiting for her to respawn.