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letting go of you, that's a heartbreak

Summary:

"When I open my eyes at last... please save me, savior."

***

Basil and Mari's journey has come to an end, with nowhere to go but down. Running on borrowed time, Mari's come to say goodbye. Her thoughts will always follow through the dreams of the one she lives to guide.

Notes:

never before have i hammered out two long oneshots in the same twenty-four hour period. i didn't want to let this one sit and gather dust because it's genuinely the most motivation i've had in a while... enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It must've been an hour before Basil began to stir, ears and nose dyed pink from the cold. When he woke up, he found half the picnic blanket draped over him. Over by the edge of the forest, Mari was gazing into one of the last floating mirrors that hadn't broken. The glass was a bit smudged and cracked in the top left corner, but it still gave her a clear enough view of her reflection. A girl with deep violet hair, snowy skin, and a smile sweet and smooth as honey stared back at her. Something had changed, though. Her hair was black at its roots and her eyes were darker, similar to Omori's. A strange, dusty-rose mark had made its way onto her neck. She pressed a finger on it. It didn't hurt.

When she turned, she saw Basil still curled up in the blanket, rubbing his eyes. She hurried over to him.

"I didn't mean to sleep that long," said Basil. "When do you need to do your thing?"

"I'd want to do it sooner rather than later," said Mari, "but I also want to make sure you're exploring as much as you want."

Sitting up, Basil kept his focus towards the sky. Another constellation was fizzling out above them---Mari could tell by the sudden dimness of the atmosphere. They probably wouldn't have much time to complete the trip before Basil started freaking out.

"I want to see the lake." Basil tossed the blanket off himself and smoothed it out, making sure the corners were still neat despite the neglect it had faced. A month had passed since the kids were last present for a picnic.

Mari shook her head sadly. "I don't think there's much of the lake left to see."

"We can still look at the shore. I'm sure that's there."

"Alright, then."

Despite Mari's objections, he insisted on going first down the ladder. When he had a moment to take a breath, she watched him position himself only to place his hands around the outer rims. There was a moment's hesitation before he lifted both his feet.

And he slid.

Mari was too shocked to yell for him, only watching him disappear beneath the clouds like he was on a carnival ride. Sighing to herself, (kids will be kids, she thought,) she climbed down the ladder the way any sane person would. It was a lot easier on her knee going down than up, but it still took lots of control to not lose her grip and go tumbling the rest of the way. Down at the bottom, she leaned against the ladder to massage her knee again while Basil sat patiently in front of her.

"That was a little scary," he said. "It was also fun, but I don't think I'll go down like that very often."

"Jeez, Basil, you almost gave me a heart attack up there."

"Oh, I'm really sorry. We can keep exploring whenever you're ready."

After a moment, the angel took the flower boy's hand, and they continued on through the forest together. The fog had gotten thicker and the air had gotten colder, prompting Mari to wish that she'd been given some kind of sweater back during the creation of Headspace.

"Did the others ever know about the dream?" Basil asked suddenly.

The answer hurt, but it came to her mind instantly. "I don't think anybody did, really. They were too busy enjoying life to notice the purpose they were meant to serve."

"Sometimes I wish I never learned." His voice dropped to a whisper. "I don't think I can be this self-aware."

"We don't have a lot of time left, and I've known this for years. It's sad, knowing why you're here but not being able to say."

"Are you looking for him?"

So Basil knew, somehow. He knew there was a boy who was never meant to be here on his own, but was still hiding out somewhere. All they had to do was find him, and Mari could send him back on his way for what was hopefully the final time. As much as she wanted to leave Eden, she couldn't help but be scared of where she'd end up after the story was over.


When they broke through to the shore of the North Lake, they froze. Beyond the fog was a wall of black, the tide visibly lowering in front of them. Here was obvious decay. Basil was shaken up, clinging to Mari like a small child again and trying not to cry. Mari was upset as well, but she had to be the calming guide.

There was only one thing she could come up with on the spot. "Oh, and I was hoping we could take a raft on the water, too. So much for that."

But at the mention of the raft, Basil seemed to get worse, staring at the pastel sand beneath him as he raised a hand to cup his neck. The scars bulged once again, and if Mari didn't know any better, she'd say they were shining with something red.

"I... uh... I don't re---I don't---"

"Take your time, Basil. It's okay." Mari put her arms around him, pulling him into an embrace.

"I don't really like raft rides," he managed to choke out.

Suddenly, Mari noticed a patch of black near the shoreline. It spread and contracted with the lapping waves, shells falling through. It was a hole, no doubt about it.

"Careful if you want to look around," she warned Basil. "There's a hole in the sand."

"A hole?" He was lost.

Curiosity getting the better of him, he tugged Mari over to the edge of the hole. She made him stand back from its rim. Together, they watched it grow and shrink, stars sparkling in its void. It had to be a path to somewhere. Each star glimmered like moonstone, as if to say it was time for forgiveness and time to move on. It was threatening and scary, but she had a feeling her brother was down there.

"I think he might be down there," Mari told Basil.

Basil shook his head. "You're not suggesting that we---"

"I think we need to go down there."

"No. No! I know where that goes! I don't wanna go back! You can't take me!"

"It'll be okay. I won't let go of you."

"They all said that." Basil was on the verge of tears. "I hate it there. They don't know how badly I was hurt over and over again. Don't you know that keeping a secret is easier if your partner is dead? I don't wanna go back, Mari. I'll get hurt again."

Mari gently pulled him into another embrace, trying her best not to cry. "I swear I'll never let them hurt you. Now that I'm allowed to help you, I'll keep you safe forever. It's okay, Basil."

"I can't go! They'll find me! I just wanted to get away from the altar!"

The little boy began to sob, and the angel tried to do her best to comfort him.

"Basil, listen to me. Are you listening? I can't leave you up here by yourself, but I won't let anything touch you down there. I've had enough experience as an untouchable guardian angel to keep you out of harm's way. You need to trust me. Can you do that?"

After a few minutes, the tears stopped. "Okay," Basil sniffled, wiping his nose on the back of his hand. "Swear it to me. I can't forgive you if you take it back."

"I swear." Mari pressed her hand against Basil's forehead, which was now free of stardust.

When Basil had composed himself, the two stared down into the hole. How would they get down?

"I think we need to jump," the flower boy said finally. He was still shaking, squeezing Mari's hand.

"You might be right. I don't see another way down."

It was quiet for a minute as Mari watched the stars twinkle. Her brother was down here somewhere. She learned it was a dark place deep below Headspace, even though she wasn't supposed to. She had a feeling Basil had been there as well, judging by his fear. No matter what lurked in the darkness, she'd be there to protect him. She was a savior, after all, the polar opposite of Omori. When nobody was around to watch, she learned that he wandered through to protect by hiding horrible things. Mari wasn't allowed to, but her role was to uncover and aid in moving on. She was there for everyone with broken wings, and now it was time for her heart to break as well.

"Let's jump, Basil."

On the count of three, the two plunged into the darkness of the hole, eyes sealed tight with fear. Mari felt like she was turning over and over forever in an infinite window of deja vu. She'd tumbled like this once before. There was no air to accompany the fall, and out of nowhere, her neck began to sting. She suddenly remembered the blotchy mark on it, the one that didn't hurt but was now burning like an open flame. All of a sudden, she seemed to stop.

Peering through one eye, she found herself and Basil surrounded in deep violet similar to her hair, floating slowly to the ground. Basil finally let go of her hand, keeping his hands close to his chest as he drifted downwards. He'd lost his trademark flower crown through the initial drop. Their surroundings gradually grew brighter and brighter, stars coming together to light the way until it looked like they'd come full circle back into the remnants of Headspace.

"What's that light?" Basil asked, pointing to a bright white circle getting larger beneath them.

After a couple minutes of steady drifting, they finally landed on a small pink strip of land at the foot of a flight of multicolored stairs, their hues rippling like a prism. Before them was a large circular room lined by sheer violet curtains. This definitely wasn't a regular part of Headspace.

Basil frowned. "I don't think I've been here before. I can't really help you."

"Well, it looks safe," said Mari. A white light shone down into the room, and a large yellow cat was fast asleep behind the wall. Hero had said that this same yellow cat watched over them in the Neighbor's Room, wherever that was. "Should we check it out?"

The little boy was already one step ahead of her, climbing the stairs while looking around with wonder. Mari followed suit, careful not to lose her footing. At the top of the stairs, Basil let out a gasp.

Before them was a bedroom, six neatly-made beds in the middle of the floor. It was highly unlikely that they were ever used. A yellow shelf lined the wall, topped with various things. Basil's main focus was on the potted plants to the right, three on the shelf and three on the floor. He hurried over to the blossoms, examining them closely and holding them up to the light to make sure they were growing well. A small hand mirror was on the covers of the purple bed. Mari picked it up and gazed at her reflection one more. Her dark roots had grown much further---her hair was more black than purple, if anything. Her skin also bore a gray undertone, and her eyes were as dark as Omori's. The mark on her neck had extended to a ring around it, blotchy and inflamed and painful to the touch like something had chafed her skin.

There, up ahead, was her target. A figure stood in front of the shelf, hands over a picnic basket just like hers. Basil, finally able to tear himself away from the flowers, returned to her side.

"Is that him?" he whispered.

Mari nodded. "Stay by a bed, just in case he wants space."

Slowly, Mari moved closer to the boy, Basil parting from her again to sit down on a bed wrapped in green blankets. The boy was dressed in a white long-sleeved shirt, a navy-colored shirt over top, and dark slacks. He was small and weak and visibly fragile---it was a person she'd know anywhere.

"Long time, no see," she said quietly.

The boy turned around, uneasy. His right eye was covered by a gauzy eyepatch, his left shadowed by dark circles indicating he wasn't sleeping well despite sleeping all day.

"It's been a while. I know you're doing better, at least."

"...No?" he croaked, voice raspy from years of hardly being used.

"I wonder if you realize this place is gradually falling apart. You hardly ever come anymore. I'm not mad, though. I want you to spend more time in reality."

Sunny stared at the floor, breathing short and shallow like he was on the verge of death. He'd spent four years under the guide of a virtual angel, and he had a feeling he knew what this was about. He knew he was letting go---he knew ever since he laid Omori to rest. He wasn't ready to live with it yet. It was high time to let Mari out of Eden, even though she'd been his savior for so long.

"You haven't grown a lot," Mari remarked. "But you're older than me now, aren't you? I'm happy you made it this far."

Really, Sunny was almost as tall as Mari now, but it wasn't much more than his height when he was younger.

"Where'd you find him?" Sunny pointed at Basil, seated quietly on his bed.

Basil smiled. "Hey, we made it together. I knew you wouldn't leave me."

Right, Mari thought. Basil's older than me, too. They all are.

It was bittersweet for Mari, knowing that her little brother had managed to be older than her. But even through everything, he was still alive. She'd gotten him to wake up long enough to tell the Truth. Now it was time to let the sun shine in and close this dream, once and for all.

"Are you ready?" the angel asked softly. "Don't worry, I'll still be with you for a while. We can talk in the real world."

"...I'm sorry."

Mari only pulled her brother into an embrace, her arm around her head the same way she always held him when they were kids.

"I love you, Sunny. Take care for me."


Sunny had been awake for a while now, but he was still deep in his head. It seemed like he fell asleep in his clothes again. Even though he had his new cat by his side, he still couldn't fall into an easy rest. Rubbing his eye, he looked around the bedroom. It had been a month since he moved. Mari said she'd meet him again in the real world. Of course, it was all in the final moment of a dying dream. He doubted it meant anything. But she'd been trapped there for so long, confined to a blanket when she could've been out seeing the world the way the dream kids were. It wasn't easy to leave Headspace behind and let it fall to pieces. It wasn't an easy battle to fight, but it was a necessary one.

"Hey, I'm over here if you need me."

He remembered that voice, coming through his dreams to put Headspace on the sidelines and speak to Sunny himself. Now that Mari was free from Eden, she was seated on top of his dresser, smoky and dressed all in white. Sunny almost ran when he saw her, wings extending past her as a real angel clinging to rainwater and a heart made of faith, love, hope, and anger. It had to have been anger that propelled her to break free. Whether it was from being trapped so long or from watching her world come apart, he couldn't tell. His brain had all but given up on him.

"You were supposed to stay in the bedroom," Sunny whispered, fear and guilt flooding his veins.

Mari closed her eyes. "But I promised you that I'd say goodbye before I left. I have faith that Basil's doing better as well."

"Then why not see him? Why me?"

"You're my little brother. Letting go of you was a heartbreak, and I won't do it again without giving you something to remember me."

Woven into the shadows, Mari's heart was a million pounds in her chest. She'd been holding onto this for a while. It wasn't much, but she prayed it would help her brother with letting her move on.

"I want you to have this."

She held up a necklace in front of Sunny, bearing a small, blue-violet colored gem.

"No," said Sunny. "It isn't real. I'm letting you go now."

"Sunny, take it. It'll help you carry on without me."

"Why?"

Mari carefully fastened the necklace around his neck. "It's iolite," she explained. "It's supposed to help you find your footing in life and give you strength to keep going. We could all use it in our lives."

Sunny sat in silence, tears stinging his eye. It was finally time. He couldn't keep putting it off---it was time to let Headspace die. He had to release his virtual angel.

"Can I have another hug?" he asked, willing himself not to cry.

"Of course."

The ghost girl embraced her brother one last time, making sure to stay in position as long as she could to savor her short time with him. There were only so many days in a year where she was allowed to come back. She just wanted to give him a final hug before returning to her glass coffin.

"Thanks, Sunny," she told him. "Be sure to visit me often."

The boy went completely still, then began to shake. "I.... I'll miss you, nee-san.

Mari let go of him and gave him a sad smile, admiring the necklace on him. He didn't look back at her, though.

He got up and left his bedroom, pacing the length of the apartment until the ticking clocks in the dead of night overwhelmed him and drove him out onto the balcony. The city was so bright at night. It was about two in the morning, but the activity of cars may as well have made it twelve in the afternoon. A sudden dizzy spell overcame Sunny, and he had to grip the railing with a shaky hand so he wouldn't fall. He could hardly see out of his left eye, still bubbling with tears. He'd done it. He let Mari go. He had no reason to keep visiting Headspace. He had no idea what was to come of his life and his dreams without it, but it was over. Sunny had yet to win the war, but the battle had drawn to a close. His big sister was finally flying high in whatever laid between life and death.

Cautiously, with his free hand, he ran a finger over his iolite necklace. It was cold. It was glassy. It was real. He might've been hallucinating his sister, but he didn't hallucinate her gift. Maybe the necklace found him itself. He wasn't sure what he'd tell his mother in the morning.

But when the night-blooming cereus opened its petals and the morning glory fell, Sunny cried the whole way.


There's so much I wish I could take back---

Sometimes, I think, "maybe it's too late..."

Though the pain remains, and though it may be hard...

...I'll carry on.

Notes:

thanks for riding through this one with me! i recommend that you give virtual angel a listen after this, just to get an idea of what i was going for. while the theme isn't quite the same as the one present here, it's still strong nonetheless.

also, if you plan on reading more things i put out in the future, you might see a lot of mentions of iolite. it's a cool rock.... it definitely matches 90% of the themes of omori.... yeah this is a total win i think

also once again, interaction is encouraged. i'm still lonely........

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