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Peter smiled as he walked into the living room, a bounce in his step. Natasha looked up, raising and eyebrow.
"What got you in such a mood, little spider?" She asks, setting down the book she was reading.
Clint looks up from his place on the floor, blinking at Peter.
Peter grins, opening his mouth when-
"Fucking FINALLY." Tony's shout comes from the kitchen, before he rushes in, Harley hot on his heels. "THE LITTLE PUNK AND THE KID ARE DATING."
He shouts, before screeching as Harley full body tackles him. The pair tumble put into the hallways, leaving behind a stunned Peter, Clint, and Natasha.
Natasha turns to Peter, whistling at him.
"Dang, little spider. Finally catch the Harl's eye?" She smirks, as Peter blushed.
"HE ALREADY CAUGHT MY EYES YEARS AGO, NAT!" Haley shouts from the hallway, before Tony yells something about PDA.
Peter blushes, smiling, before Pepper walks into the room.
"Hello son. Why is your father?" Pepper asks, obviously knowing already.
"He's trying to murder my boyfriend. Or my boyfriend is trying to murder him, I haven't picked yet." Peter says, right as a loud crash sound can be heard suspiciously close to the staircase.
Pepper raises a eyebrow.
"Boyfriend, huh? Do you need the talk, kiddo?" She asks, smirking. Clint chokes on air and Natasha barely hides her laugh.
"What! No, no, I'm fine! No talks needed here, no sir-"
"See, Peter, when two people love eachother very much-"
"NOPE, LA LA LA LA!!"
"CONSENT IS SEXY-"
"I DON'T NEED THE TALK I PROMIS-"
It becomes a thing after that, trying to give Peter The Talk. Loki and Pepper, respectively, have been the most successful.
Pepper managed to explain the 'In's and Out's' (pun indeed entended) to Peter, while Loki has explained more of the way things worked to the teen.
Bruce, so far, had only screamed about Consent Being Sexy.
Clint, however, had taken to explaining how to safely do drugs. "Kid, if you wanna get high, at least make sure someone knows where you are."
(Listen, kids. Author here. I know adults will be like "Don't Do Drugs!" and that's fair, you shouldn't, but I, as a teen myself, know damn well someone somewhere is gonna try something. If you are going to do drugs, do them safely, and with people you trust. Know your limits. Back to the crack, now.(Pun very much entended)
But the very absolute icing on the cake was May Fucking Parker walking up to Peter and throwing a box of Spiderman themed condoms at him.