Chapter Text
Komachi stared at Hachiman Hikigaya expectantly.
'Don't have high hopes on me, Komachi," he mentally said to himself as he racked his brain for any ideas. Of course his life turned out to be such a huge mess. It wouldn't be his life it wasn't. In other words, Situation Normal: All Fucked Up.
He definitely can't convince Yukino to stop running for president and just let him fuck around with Iroha's campaign speech.
And since Yukino's running for president, Yui will too.
Which means he would have to make Iroha the president. Just as his sister wanted. Just as his sister wanted. It's fine, it's not a bad thing to do because it was requested by his sister, right? No one would blame him if Iroha became the president of the club if it was his sister who made him do it.
He hated himself for thinking that.
And suddenly, his brain conjured the mental image of Haruno. Yep, you guessed it right, THE Haruno Yukinoshita, Yukino's older sister. And then his mind switched to Yukino. And he realised something. What if the reason Yukino wanted to run for president... wasn't just for Iroha?
If Yukino became the Student Council President, Yui would probably become the vice-preside...
"Hold up a minute, what?" he said out loud blankly. Kawasaki, Totsuka, Zaimokuza and even his little sister stared at him in confusion. "Actually, if the main problem at hand is the dissolution of the service club, then we really have nothing to worry about if Yukino wins," Hachiman Hikigaya smiled to himself as he said that out loud. "And... why is that?" his sister asked. "That's because we'll be going from one club to the next," he explained to the three of them. Komachi widened her eyes- how- no, why didn't she think of that before? It's such a simple and elegant solution.
"But you would probably have to explain that to them, though," she said. "Huh, I'm pretty sure they all understood what I meant. Right guys?" Hikigaya asked, confused.
The other three blankly nodded before Totsuka snapped out of it. "Hachiman, I think she meant Yuigahama and Yukinoshita..."
"Big bro, you're way too much of an idiot even though you're really smart sometimes."
"Sorry..."
Hikigaya, to say the least, was pleased with how things were going. Yukino was trying her hardest to get nominated, Yui was trying her best to get nominated... and wow, he never really assumed he'd see the day where he would get all that cheesy the way he is right now.
And so, the day slowly rolled by until clubs began. "Hey!" Yui ran up to his desk as he got up. "Let's go together!"
"Sure," he said and walked out and waited for her as she gathered her items. It took a while before she came up to him. "Why did you ditch me?"
"Same response as last time- I didn't, I was waiting for you," he said, flicking her forehead before walking away. She walked a little faster before being able to catch up and match his pace. "So... What are you doing right now?" she asked. "Nothing."
"You gave up on the terrible-campaign-speech idea?"
"No," he said, deciding to lie a little. "Although I guess I'm starting to think of alternatives," he sighed. Yui pouted. "And let me guess, all of these involve you committing some sort of self-sacrifice?"
"Maybe."
And before they knew it, they were standing before the door. Yui took a deep breath (just like the last time they went together... at this point Hikigaya wondered if she did this everytime she entered the classroom). Inside sat Yukino, writing on multiple pieces of paper whatever she's writing... he guessed. He didn't have much of a clue about what she's doing. She looked up and smiled briefly at Yui, before narrowing her eyes at Hikigaya. Yeah, I get it... I look like an insect, am I right. He took his usual seat while Yui took her usual seat too. "So the two of you won't change your minds?" Hikigaya asked. "I won't. This is the best course of action."
"I won't either."
"You don't have to run," Yukino said with a look of concern to Yui. The recipient of her message kept her head well bowed down. "Say, Yukinoshita, if Isshiki didn't come to us with her problem... would you still take up the position?" Hikigaya decided to be straightforward with his question. "What?" Yukino narrowed her eyes at him. Why so tense, he thought as he sweatdrop. "I asked what I had asked. If Isshiki didn't come to us for our help and someone offered you a position to be the president of the student council, would you still go for it?" he tried once again.
Yukino narrowed her eyes. "Are you trying to imply that I'm doing this for my own, personal gain? That I'm doing this just because I don't like this club or because I seek the prestig-"
"No."
Hikigaya sighed. He should've seen it coming, knowing her though. "Well, let's rephrase the question. Let's say someone offered you the position of presidency," he said, locking eyes with Yukino with a grin. "And the two of us are going to join it too. Would you become the student council president?"
"So in other words... You want to convert the service club into the student council?"
"So you're telling me, because of the problem I caused, the three of you are going to change clubs- all because I asked you for some help?" Iroha asked in disbelief. "That's the third time you are confirming that with us," Hikigaya said annoyed. Is it really that hard to believe? "We believe that's a right choice to make, especially since Yukino is really good at handling school stuff, Yui can help Yukino and I can just slack off," he added flippantly.
"Wait a minute Hikigaya," Yukino turned to him. "What do you mean do nothing. You do realise that you're going to be the VP right..?"
"Huh?" He stared at her. "That's what I thought too," Yui said. "Wait, that's not how it works and secondly, I'm not good enough-"
"Bullshit. That's what I'm gonna call that," Yukino said as she looked down at her paperwork. Hikigaya stared at her, slack-jawed. That must have been the first time she has ever said- or actually impled something nice about me. Until he realised Yukino had done that plenty of times and it was just that it was so out-of-character for her to do so, so each time feels like first times. Iroha opened her mouth for brief moment before closing it again. Hikigaya immediately switched his attention to her. It seemed as if she wanted to say something, but she couldn't. "Isshiki?" He called out to her. "You're making mentally retarded faces, could you please stop that?"
Iroha glared at him while the other two girls deadpanned. Yep, classic Hachiman Hikigaya alright.
"W- well, I was actually thinking... if that's what's going to happen, then can I join you guys?"
"What?" Hikigaya asked in surprise. "Hell no-" "Of course!" exclaimed Yui Yuigahama, cutting off his refusal. He stared at her, and she stared back, before the two started looking over at Yukino. Please, we may have our misgivings, but I would like you to take my side here. For my sake. She thought for a while before uttering "I don't see why not."
Three cute girls in a club. Only one guy in the same said club. And that one guy was Hachiman Hikigaya.
He wanted to crawl into a hole and die.