Chapter Text
You still felt raw. Your head hurt from crying. Your chest hurt from the heartbreak. You were also pissed. Still fuming from the whole ordeal. You had left the shared house but no one thought you were leaving the whole Task Force. You didn't want that to change. So you snuck out. Packing you things away in a duffel bag and that's where you are now. Sitting in front of a gas station. Your bag at your feet as you scan the area. You weren't looking for threats. You were looking for them. For your team. Well, whom you thought were your team.
A real team wouldn't have done this to you. Wouldn't have lied. As far as you knew they didn't know you had left. They wouldn't know until morning. You hoped at least. You opened your phone putting in the number you knew by heart into a new text thread.
you: Roze- it's Menace. Are you around the UK by chance?
You didn't expect the reply to come in so fast. You had almost thought it was one of the guys. Asking where you were. If it was Soap asking if you wanted to do one of your midnight pranks on Gaz. If it was Gaz asking if you wanted to hang out and listen to music with him. Ghost asking for a late night training session. Price asking if you two could just talk things out. None of which you would be doing. Yet none were what came across your phone.
Unknown: Close. Germany. Do you need me to come get you? If you catch a train down to Germany tonight I can grab you from the station.
you: Sounds good. I'll be ditching the phone. I'll call you with a payphone when I am there.
Unkown: Sounds good babygirl. See you soon.
You sigh in relief. You knew that you needed to get out of here. As soon as possible. It wouldn't be hard to get a car. To get to the train station. You look around at the gas station. Hiding your dog tags under your shirt and sitting up. You scanned the area, spotting your target. A man getting off of his motorbike. You wait for him to fill it up, leaning against the seat of it. You wish you could feel guilty right now. You couldn't. You get to your feet, leaving the phone on and leaving it by the curb. You approach the man. You are fast. You didn't want to waste time talking to him. Grappling him from behind and dragging him over the bike. Arm barring him into a chokehold and letting him fall to the ground. You grab his keys and remove his helmet. Securing both on your body before taking the bike.
You leave him on the pavement. A small part of you does feel guilty for it. You aren't a bad person. You just needed to get out of here. Needed an out that you wouldn't get again. You knew if you went back they would sweet talk you into staying. That Price could convince you to put all of this behind you. It took you an hour to reach the train station. Getting to it. Last train to Germany would be leaving in fifteen minutes and you would be there by morning.
The wait for the train was hell. You keep looking at the entrances. You knew Price wouldn't show up himself, he would send Ghost. Ghost would hunt you down and he was the only one who may have a chance in beating you in a fight. The train arrives, and you and two others file in. You take a seat in the back. Where you can watch the entire car. See every entrance. It still felt like you weren't out of there yet. Like you were so far from being away from them. The wait for the door to close made your anxiety spike. Your leg bouncing as your hand is rested on your blade's handle on your hip.
The doors begin to close and you almost sigh in relief. Until you see the gloved hand stop the door. Letting it open again. That skeleton glove hand. You gulp.
"Fuck" You whisper under your breath. Your hand unclipping the knife from it's holster. He walks in his eyes to you immediately. He knows you too well. He let's the doors close behind him and you watch him like a hawk as he walks closer. Taking a seat beside you. At first neither talk as the train begins to move. You Stare straight ahead though you could see every move he makes from the corner of your eye.
"Where ya going love?" He asks finally.
"Somewhere that isn't here." You say firmly. He nods looking around the car.
"I am guessing there isn't something I could say to bring you back?" He asks, this wasn't how you thought this would go. You look at him and shake your head.
"John sent you?" You ask
"No one else knows you left. I was out havin a smoke when I saw you. Trailed you. That poor guy is gonna be missin his bike when he wakes up" He says, you nod chewing on the inside of your cheek. "You know he's going to go mad when he finds out"
"I don't care."
"I think you do"
"I don't."
He sighs.
"I know you think that, none of us feel anything for what happened. It's not true. We care. It's just apart of the job, darlin" He says, you nod.
"I know Ghost. If you're going to try to convince me to stay. It's useless. I am not going back." You reply, he clicks his tongue. Nodding slightly and folding his arms across his chest.
"Sure is shite losin a teammate. Now I gotta do your job for ya." He jests, you know he's trying to lighten the mood. Not that you know how to allow him to right now. "I always knew you were too sweet for this line of work. Don't get me wrong, you are a- well for lack of a better term- a menace. You aren't made of steal though. You have a heart."
"Maybe you're right." You say
"Protect that heart. It's one of your better qualities. Besides the eyes." He says, you let him pull that chuckle from you.
"So what are you going to do? Tell Price I left?" You ask, he shakes his head.
"I was never here. He'll find out and I will help him look for you. He doesn't have to know that I was here. He doesn't have to know I am not dragging you back by your hair kicking and screaming. Don't want to- ruin one of the only good friendships I made here" He admits, you sarcastically put a hand over your heart and fake a pout at him. "Tell anyone I said that and I'll cut ya tongue out."
"Yessir" You quip turning back to face the front of the train.
"I get off on the next stop. Head back to base. I hope- I never have to see you in the field again. Certainly not as the enemy" He says "I may be able to let you go here. Can't promise I'll be able to do that next time"
"I understand Ghost." You say, and you do.
As he said, when the next stop came around he got off. You remained watching him leave. You slouch in the chair staring down at your combat boots. By morning you had arrived and just as you told Roze you grabbed the nearest payphone. Dialing her number once again. The quick conversation to tell her you had arrived. You waited at the new station. Still unsure, your safety. Price would be awake by now. He would know you were gone. They would begin looking for you.
Roze showed up an hour later. She opened her arms to you and you wasted no time falling into them. Grabbing her in a hug that you needed for what feels like years. She holds you tightly.
"I've missed you bitch" She says, you chuckle against her shoulder.
"I missed you too. Come on- the sooner we get out of here the better" You say breaking away and grabbing your bag up. She hooks your arms together and you walk to the car.
"You going to tell me why you're running? Well- who you're running from?" She asks, you thought about it. You would have to at some point.
"Maybe later. I am fucking tired." You say, she nods understanding that right now talking about this was the last thing you wanted. You just wanted to get out of here. You get to a base. A much larger one than you are used to. She drags you through to her quarters. They are nicer than the ones you had at the task force. She actually has her own and the twin bed you had grown used to was replaced with a full.
You sit down on the edge of the bed. The feeling of security not kicking in yet. You don't know if it ever will. She sits in front of you, kneeling really.
"Talk to me?" She asks you swallow hard.
"My team we uhh- went on a mission. I had to kill someone that I really didn't want to kill. I really didn't want to. My Captain he uh- knew it would be the case. He didn't warn me. He lied to me actually about it. Knowing I wouldn't want to do it. He did it just to teach me a lesson for refusing to kill someone on the mission prior." You were vague. You didn't tell her everything. You didn't tell her that you and your Captain were more than just teammates. More than just friends. More than you should be. She nods.
"I'm sorry Menace" She says, you nod to her. You knew that she knew you were holding back. Yet neither of you said a damn thing.
Price had tracked your phone. Dragging the rest of the guys to the near by gas station he pinged you at. As promised Ghost kept his mouth shut. Looking around and picking up the phone like he didn't watch you set it there. He holds it up.
"We don't know when she left. She could be half way across Europe by now" Gaz says. Price nods, he has been clenching his jaw since he woke up. Since you weren't in bed beside him. Usually when you two fight you would go throw knives at a target or train with Ghost and forget not to take a bit easy on him. Then sneak back into bed.
He sighs out.
"Fucking hell" He mutters
"She didn't say anything to any of you?" He asks, everyone shakes their heads.
"Negative sir" Gaz says
"I know that she was upset bout the mission but didn't think she would leave" Soap says, Price nods he didn't think you would leave either. Though he couldn't say he didn't deserve it. He didn't handle it right. Your anger. Your emotions. Your fight. The mission itself. He found himself following every wrong step he made and it twisted his gut and his chest.
"What do you want to do Cap?" Ghost asks
"Find her. Bring her back here" He says, "Start in California"
"What's in California sir?" Soap asks
"Her family"