Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Mizuki Akiyama is a normal teen

They want nothing more than to be included and uplifted by their peers. They want acceptance and approval. This may seem like a simple task, but not for Mizuki.

“Transgender
Adjective

Denoting or relating to a person whose gender identity does not correspond with the sex registered for them at birth.”

Mizuki was thought to be a boy. They lived as a boy for the first 13 years of their life. After middle school, however, Mizuki discovered they didn’t exactly feel like a boy. After some research, they came across many different terms. “Transgender”, “Demi-Girl”, “Non-Binary”, “Genderfluid”, so many labels with specific definitions. It was overwhelming. After some self exploration, Mizuki learned that they didn’t need to fit within society's definitions of “man”, “woman”, or “other”. Mizuki was Mizuki, and nothing could change that.

Kamiyama high students are not as open minded as Mizuki is. Whether it’s just a dirty look, or an outright threat, these kids are ruthless with their bullying. After falling into depression and multiple attempts on their life, Mizuki began to hide themselves from the outside. Their band, Nightcord at 25:00 does not know any of the aforementioned details. Mizuki wants to keep it that way.

Chapter Text

*Yawnnnn*
Mizuki stretches as their alarm blares throughout their room. It’s 12:00 pm.

*ding!*

Their phone is blowing up with messages. YouTube comments, DMs, praise, hate, suggestions, they were a star. Scrolling through the comments, a smile forms on their face. Mizuki loves being a minor celebrity, especially when they are getting praise for just doing what they love! Best of all nobody knows their secret, and nobody needs to know. That’s the beauty of the internet, you can put up a fake facade of who you want to be, instead of showing who you have to be.

Mizuki walks over to their mirror and begins planning out their outfit for today.

“Hmm.. If I want to go with the purple ribbon, I should wear some yellow hair clips to compliment it… but I also want to wear my new Mary Janes… Maybe today I’ll be extra pink instead…” they thought out loud. Mizuki thinks out loud often, which irritates their bandmates, especially Ena.

After finally picking out their outfit, they make a quick post to their story.
“Ootd! Pink explosion 💖🎀🌸!”

Mizuki has big plans for today. They were meeting up with Airi to begin preparation! Preparation for Ena’s birthday of course!

They don’t like to admit it, but Mizuki knows deep down they have feelings for Ena. Her confident smile, her sassy tone, her soft hair, what wasn’t there to love? Mizuki has dreamed of having a picture perfect relationship with her. They would have their own apartment with an art studio, and lots of editing equipment. They’d have lots of cats, and maybe a few reptiles! The walls would be decorated ceiling to floor with Ena’s gorgeous paintings, they would have movie nights every Friday… Mizuki could go on forever thinking about what could be.

But it can’t be. Ena likes girls. No matter how hard Mizuki tries, they can never seem to fit in with the other femmes, feeling out of place with their masculine build.

Not too much longer, the clock hit 2:00, which meant Mizuki should’ve been on their way to the cafe 10 minutes ago… Airi won’t mind, right?

Chapter Text

It was raining outside. There was an umbrella leaning on Mizuki’s front porch. They hesitated for a second, outweighing the costs of leaving it. Ultimately, they left it there. Mizuki’s light curls turned into dark waves as they walked along the sidewalk. The rain ran down their neck, making them shiver. Mizuki was taking it all in, until they saw the time. 2:05. Their leisurely pace turned into a brisk walk.

Eager to meet their friend (and dry off), Mizuki ran towards the cafe once it was in sight. They entered, hearing a small chime as the door opened and closed.

“Took you long enough…” Airi sat at a small table with her arms crossed, looking slightly upset. Her displeasure turned into excitement once Mizuki sat down and brought out a small notebook.

“I’m thinking we can all go out to dinner, then come back to have a sleepover! There’s also a cool laser tag place Akito told me about, we could try that too!” Mizuki beamed, “17 is a big birthday!”

“Every birthday’s a big one to you Mizuki… But I love your ideas! A sleepover sounds like so much fun!! Who would we invite?? We have so much planning to do!” Airi leaned forward and stood up a bit. Both of them were way too excited to be planning a birthday party.
“All of Nightcord of course, and Shizuku should come too! I think Emu and Nene would be cool to come, so how about that for the guests?”

“So like a girls night out!” Airi practically jumped out of her seat. Mizuki hesitated, then nodded in agreement. Airi thinks they’re a girl… Mizuki smiled to themself.

“Helloooo? Are you okay?” Airi prodded

“Sorry, I was planning out the costs!! I’m so excited, we’ll have to email everyone!” Mizuki pulled out there phone to send a group text.

Heyyyy you guys should come to Ena’s bday party!! We’ll do it this Saturday, and have a sleepoverrrrr It’ll be like a girls night :33 Okokok lmk!!!!212i120943209 <3333333 LOVE YOUUU

“Over the top text is sent, now we wait!!” Responses trickled in, all saying they’ll come over. Only one more thing to do: tell Ena she’s hosting people (probably should’ve told her beforehand…)

M: ENAAAA GUESS WHAT

E: Chicken butt.

M: NOT THIS TIME. WE’RE GOING TO HAVE A SLEEPOVER AT UR HOUSE ON SATURDAY YAYYYYYY

E: MIZUKI. DO NOT PLAN THINGS AT MY HOUSE WITHOUT ASKING?!?

M: HAHEhAEH SORRY POOKIE

E: WTFFF

This will be fun!!

Chapter Text

Mizuki was walking home with their eyes glued to their phone.

They stumbled through a puddle, causing their shoes to soak with water. “Damn, these were brand new too…”
“Do you need a towel?” A sweet voice came out of nowhere. A voice Mizuki faintly recognized.
They whipped their head around, turning to see a tall purple-haired boy. It was Rui Kamishiro.
Mizuki and Rui had a complicated past. They were friends in middle school, both being the outcasts of their class. They didn’t talk much after Rui began high school, which caused them to drift apart
“Rui.. yes please. Thank you” they cautiously responded.
“I guess it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, Mizuki. Your hair has gotten so long…” there was a pause. This is not how Mizuki wanted their day to end, having to deal with backhanded comments and insults.
“It looks great!” He continued. Mizuki was slightly surprised at this compliment, and decided maybe this wasn’t so bad after all. Rui reached into his seemingly bottomless bag and grabbed a small towel out, handing it to Mizuki.
“Jeez, you still keep so much crap in there huh? I’m not surprised,” they scoffed playfully.
“You’re welcome, and it’s not crap, everything in here has a purpose. Your shoes would still be wet if it wasn’t for my magical bag!” Rui jokes. Mizuki let out a reluctant giggle. They missed this banter.
Rui continued, “I should let you get going, you look tired.”
“Rude! I look as cute as ever!” Rui chuckled, a blush spreading across his face.
Oh.
Mizuki quickly left, wrapping up whatever meetup this was. They continued their journey home, a bit faster this time.

—------------------------------------------------

Mizuki and Rui had a complicated past. They’ve always had some sort of romantic tension, but Mizuki believed they left that in middle school.

They were never together, just went on a few “dates”. Barely even that. But for some reason, Mizuki couldn’t stop thinking about that smile he had flashed. The same lips who’ve kissed their hand, the same hand that has been interlocked with his. Did Mizuki still have feelings for Rui? It can’t be, they like Ena. Mizuki dramatically face planted into their bed, groaning about how much they hate feelings.
“Thisisntfairillneverfigurethisoutanditsnotlikeeitherofthemwouldeverlovemewhyamilikethis” they vented into their pillow.
They decided to take a quick nap before hopping on Nightcord, setting an alarm on their phone for 24:30
They soon drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

“Amia..? You there?” Ena questioned. “You seem off, why aren’t you talking?”
“Oh, my bad!! Guess I’ve just had a long day..” Mizuki said apologetically.
“K just demoed a new song, we want you to start thinking about the music video!”
“Right! I’ll listen to it, DM me K!”
Mizuki attempted to keep their mind from wandering when listening, picturing a beautiful intricate outfit to go along with the design. A pink dress with a caged skirt, ribbons tying the whole thing together. Bows and lace strewn about, with floofy armbands and fancy shoes.
“Okay!” Mizuki announced, “I have an idea for the video! I envision a pastel pink paradise, decorated with ribbons and tulle. In the middle will be a beautiful dress designed just like the room, with added flashy structures like lots of fluff and a caged skirt.”
The video call was silent.
“...that’s great Amia,” Mafuyu finally broke the silence.
“Don’t sound so excited, Yuki. I like it Amia, I can’t wait to help with the graphics!” Ena womp womped.
Mizuki giggled, “Thanks Enanan, and you too Yuki. I’m gonna start a mockup if you wanna help!”
The rest of the night went well. Eventually, K fell asleep on call so everyone logged off.

Mizuki’s attempts at sleeping were trivial, at this rate they’d be pulling another all nighter. After giving up all hope, they check their phone hoping to find something fun to watch. Of course, an inevitable text popped up.

Hey Mizuki, it was nice running into you today :) Sorry if it was weird, it’s been so long! We should hang out again sometime.

Rui’s always been such a dry texter. He used to use the cat emojis sometimes, but that was only when Mizuki scolded him for being boring. Their fingers hovered over the keyboard, hesitant to answer. Could they be honest about their feelings? Maybe it’s too soon.. Mizuki thought for a while before slowly hitting send on a response.

Shhhh don’t be so proper. Remember what I told you?? ANyways, It’d be cool to hang out soon!!!!! I have a ton of shit to do rn so it might take awhile :p I miss u tho!!

They stared at the text, and decided to add one more thing.

Love ya!

As Mizuki raced to delete the text, they heard a startling noise. A knock at the door. Mizuki jumped a bit, dropping their phone in their lap as the door opened.

“Yuuki-!” Mizuki shouted.

“Hey lil sis! Sorry it’s late, my flight was delayed. What were you doing on your phone that made you jump so hard? Talking to someone special~” Yuuki teased.

“Shut upp” Mizuki grinned. Their sister was one of their best friends.
Mizuki picked up their phone to finish deleting the message, but apparently the universe didn’t like them today. The message had sent.

“Fuck.”

Chapter Text

“Hm? What’s the matter?”
Mizuki buried their face in their hands and groaned, “I sent a text that I didn’t mean to and now my life is ruineddddd”
Yuuki grabbed the phone, “here lemme see. Oh it’s just Rui! Last time I checked you guys were super close..”

“Yeah but now it’s awkward!” Mizuki complained

“You’re overreacting… see? He’s typing a response already-“

Before Yuuki could finish, Mizuki snatched the phone from her

“Why is he typing so goddamn slowly..” Mizuki mumbled

<3

Mizuki felt their heart drop, relieved that Rui felt no different.

“I told youu! Let’s not worry about him though, I was thinking we could go shopping tomorrow! I’ll take you to that new boutique and then we can go to a cafe!

“That sounds like so much fun Yuuki! I’m hoping to just get a new accessory… I keep getting made fun of for wearing dresses.”

Yuuki nodded and pursed her lips, thinking of what to say.

“Mizuki, there are going to be people who don’t understand who you are. There’ll be people who don’t want to understand who you are. You can’t let them dictate how you dress and present. You’re my little sister, and you always will be. Nothing any douchebag at school says will ever change that.”

Mizuki could feel themselves tearing up at Yuuki’s statement. No matter how hard they tried, the tears came running down their face. Yuuki wrapped her arms around her sister, holding them close.