Archive of Our Own ^beta

‘Morning!’

Teddy glanced up from his patient notes to see Kitty sweep in through the double doors, phone in one hand and a tray of takeaway coffees balanced precariously in the other.

‘Look what I’ve got!’ Kitty grinned as she set the tray down on the reception desk.

‘Ooh, lovely!’ Pat clipped the cap onto his pen as he turned away from the whiteboard and took a cup from the desk. ‘Thanks, pet.’

Kitty looked at Teddy. ‘One for you, Dr Hepworth?’

‘Oh, no thank you, Katherine,’ Teddy smiled, tapping an old-fashioned metal flask standing to attention next to the computer keyboard, ‘I’ve got my tea.’

Kitty laughed as she took a cup for herself. ‘I’ll convert you one day.’

Kitty glanced up at the sudden appearance, apparently out of nowhere, of a tall man wearing crumpled nurse’s scrubs, a rolled-up magazine clutched in his hand.

‘Ooh, coffee, yes please!’ Without breaking his stride, the man grabbed a cup from the tray, took a swig and made for the break room.

‘Julian, have you prepped theatre?’ Teddy called after him.

‘Erm… Well… I - ‘

Teddy glanced at the clock. It was 7:18. The operation was due to start in twelve minutes. He felt a wave of stress grip his body. This wasn’t good enough.

Rounding the corner from one of the wards, Mary cut him off. ‘All done, Ted.’

Teddy visibly relaxed. ‘Thank you, Mary.’

‘Oh, Mary, how was last night?’ asked Kitty excitedly.

‘Oh, Kitty, you would have loved his dog!’ Mary took out her phone, smiling.

The animated chatter of the two women faded into the background as Teddy focused on the notes in his hands. Smith, Eleanor. 36 years old. Tumour excision and associated reconstruction. Teddy had the notes memorised but liked to check them before every operation just in case.

The doors burst open as Dr Button strode into the ward, cup of coffee in one hand and ream of papers in the other, with Dr Bone in close pursuit, attempting to keep up with a half-jog.

Dr Button caught sight of the drinks in the desk, ‘Ah, perfect!’ She turned around, passed her empty cup to Dr Bone, picked up a fresh one then strode on, studying her figures as she took a sip.

‘Patient will be brought through in ten minutes, Fanny!’ Teddy called after her.

‘I know!’ Dr Bone replied without looking up from her papers as she disappeared into the changing room.

Teddy nodded in approval. He could always rely on his anaesthetist to be prepared and on time. He looked at the name at the top of the whiteboard. His consultant, on the other hand…

‘Any sign of Mr Beg-Chetwynde, Humphrey?’

Teddy glanced to Dr Bone, who was still clutching Dr Button’s coffee cup.

‘Er, no,’ he replied, looking around distractedly, ‘You haven’t seen a bin anywhere, have you? There definitely used to be one here…’

Teddy sighed and put down his notes. ‘Come on, Katherine!’ he called with a good-natured smile, ‘Can’t be late for your first day in theatre!’.

‘Coming!’ Kitty cried excitedly.

She ran a few steps to catch up with Teddy as he turned and began to walk down the corridor.

‘Have you met the new registrar yet?’ asked Kitty.

‘Oh, Dr Havers?’ replied Teddy, ‘Yes, we’ve met a few times.’

‘Isn’t he handsome!’

Teddy’s face reddened. ‘Er, I don’t… I can't say I’ve noticed.’

Teddy thought back to the previous day, sitting with William after working their first ten-hour shift together. There was a high turnover of staff at the hospital and Teddy was well used to working with people he didn’t know, but there was something different about the new registrar. Working with William felt like meeting your oldest friend, slipping effortlessly into a well-rehearsed choreography.

‘Are you sure it’s ok for me to come in?’ Kitty asked, ‘I spent all of yesterday evening reading through my books and watching excisions on youtube, but I still feel like a bit of a fraud.’

Kitty looked up at Teddy nervously as he stopped walking and turned to face her.

‘Now, Kitty, remember what I said? You’re an excellent junior doctor, the most hard-working we’ve had. You’ll do perfectly, I know it.’

Kitty smiled nervously.

‘Ok?’ asked Teddy, his eyes crinkling warmly.

‘Ok.’ Kitty replied.

‘Good.’ Teddy bounced on his toes. ‘Now go and get changed and I’ll see you in theatre.’

***

‘Everyone ok to start?’

Barclay glanced around the operating theatre.

Fanny looked up from the screen she was monitoring. ‘All fine with me.’

‘Good. Blade.’

Barclay held out his hand and Mary placed a scalpel into it. ‘Knife to skin,,, 7:53.’

Teddy sighed to himself. He hated starting the day late. It happened all too frequently working under his arrogant colleague. He watched as the surgeon made a deft incision into the patient’s side. Teddy turned to Kitty.

‘Here, come round a bit more, you’ll be able to see a bit better.’

Kitty shuffled round and peered into the operating field.

‘Shit.’

Teddy looked up in alarm. ‘Everything alright, Barclay?’

‘Suction.’

‘Already?’

‘Suction, now!’
.
Teddy inserted the instrument into the wound and began pulling out the blood, which pooled in alarming quantity.

‘Bloody hell,’ he muttered, ‘Should we abort?’

‘I’ll give the instructions, thank you.’ Barclay snapped.

Teddy looked to Fanny with concern. She met his gaze. This wasn’t the first time they had been in this situation. Teddy shook his head as Barclay leaned in over the patient.

***
‘Swab! Swab!’

Teddy grabbed the packing material held out by Mary and shoved it into the wound in a desperate attempt to stop the bleeding.

‘Four units of cross-match, now!’

Pat picked up the theatre phone, dialled and started talking urgently.

‘Shit. Shit!’ Barclay looked over to Fanny. ‘How’s she doing?’

Fanny shook her head. ‘Presure’s plummeting. You need to stop that bleeding now!’

Dr Havers burst into the theatre, Julian lacing up his gown as he walked. He looked over to Teddy.

‘What’s going on?’

Teddy glanced up. ‘She’s bleeding out. We need help. Swab, Mary!’

Teddy grabbed the swab and passed it to Kitty.

‘Here, hold this down.’

Alarm bells began to blare.

‘She’s arresting!’ yelled Fanny.

‘Shit!’ cried Barclay.

‘We need to defib, now!’ Fanny grabbed the defibrillator.

‘I’m the consultant here!’

‘Fuck off, Barclay! Everyone stand clear!’

The theatre team stepped back from the operating table.

‘Clear! And… Shock! Charging… Clear… And shock!’

***

Teddy sat in the break room, head in his hands. A sombre hush weighed heavily on the room.

William swung himself into the next chair and offered him a cup of tea.

‘Here.’

‘Thanks.’ Teddy took the cup and cradled it in his hands.

‘This isn’t your fault, you know.’

Teddy looked up at his colleague. ‘I knew something wasn’t right. I should’ve done something, I should’ve stopped it.’

William hesitated for a moment, then placed his hand on Teddy’s shoulder. He squeezed it firmly.

‘You weren’t the consultant. And it wasn’t your mistake.’ William met Teddy’s eyes. ‘You’re a good doctor. I mean it.’

Teddy looked down, not wanting to maintain eye contact but feeling strangely safe under his colleague’s deep brown gaze. He closed his eyes, sitting with the moment.

Muffled shouting broke through the easy silence. Teddy looked up.

‘What was that?’

William rose, turned to the door and peered out.

‘Shit.’

William started running down the corridor towards the source of the noise.

Teddy rose immediately and looked down the corridor. An alarm began to blare. Teddy ran towards the end of the corridor, when a crowd of people was gathered. He skidded to a halt just behind William as the gathered crowd let out a collective gasp.

‘Stay back! Fucking stay back!’

A man was standing behind Kitty, back to the wall, tears in his eyes and in his hands… a scalpel. A scalpel held to Kitty’s neck. She met Teddy’s panicked gaze, pure terror in her eyes.

‘Everyone get back!’ William ushered the onlooking nurses and porters back as the alarm continued to screech. ‘Someone call security!’

‘No!’ the man cried, ‘Anyone moves and she’s dead!’

Teddy took a cautious step forward, hands outstretched. ‘Ok, sir, if you’ll please put the knife down…’

The man let out a sob. ‘You killed my wife! You lot, you killed my wife!’

‘We’re very sorry about the regrettable death of your wife, Mr Smith,’ said William, ‘If you could please put the knife down, we can talk about it.’

The man locked eyes with Teddy.

‘You! You were meant to keep her safe!’

‘I - I’m sorry…’

‘You were meant to keep her safe!’

The man tightened his grasp on Kitty.

‘Whose fault is this?’ he stared around the gathered crowd, ‘i said whose fault is this?’

Teddy looked at Kitty, her brave silence betrayed by the fear in her eyes. He had a vision of blood pooling before him. He knew what he had to do.

Teddy lunged forward, eyes locked on the scalpel, grabbing the handle with his right hand and shoving Kitty to safety with his left.

‘No!’ cried William.

Blind to the chaos around him, Teddy focused on the cruel, silver blade as he wrestled with the man, trying desperately to wrench it from his grasp. The man pulled his arm free, an arc of blood flying delicately through the air as the blade slipped from Teddy’s grasp.

Time stood still.

Teddy watched, completely detached, as the man thrust the blade forward. He watched, detached, as a deep red stain blossomed over his scrubs, dark and hot and oily. He watched as the man dropped the blade and put his hands to his head, horrified.

‘NO!’ William leapt forward as the floor came rushing up to meet Teddy. He pressed down hard on the wound.

‘We need a surgeon now!’

Teddy looked up into William’s face, his hair lit with a fluorescent halo from the halogen lamp above.

‘Please, Teddy.’ William looked distraught, ‘I can’t lose you! I can’t!’

Teddy lay peacefully amongst the chaos, bathed in that soft, deep brown gaze. He slowly reached up and gently touched the side of William’s face.

‘I’m with you now. I’ll be ok.’