Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Where We Left Off:

Previously in Light Drizzles, leading up to the current events, the skeleton brothers from six alternate universes decided to hold a tournament event. Orchid (Swapfell Toriel) made a bet with Fellgore (Underfell Asgore) over who’s Royal Guard Skeleton would win in the skelebro fighting tournament, Captain Razz from Swapfell, or Lieutenant Edge from Underfell.

After a slew of shenanigans caused Edge to be disqualified first, Orchid claimed her winnings and asked if Razz and Slim would be willing to watch Swapfell Chara while she and her now remarried to husband, S.F.Gore, could go on a date together at a fancy restaurant and have adult time. The Swapfell skeletons agreed, leaving the brothers wracking their brains on how to keep the Human occupied and out of trouble. Little did they know their babysitting job would soon expand to include two different Charas, which is more then even the former Guard Captain can handle, not that he would admit to it. Razz is confident in his abilities to keep human children under control.

Now to figure out what human children actually enjoy doing to keep busy....

***
Bookwyrm
Swapfell:
Razz: .... would the cat be enough to entertain a child for a few hours?
Slim: Probably not.
Razz: .... the Queen mentioned board games. I will have to Google those.
Slim: Snacks are a good idea too.

***
Bookwyrm
Big Bro Chat:
-BlueBerry (aka Blue): Razz, I know this is sudden and you have your Chara coming over, but can you watch my Chara too?

***
HomeHawk12
Big Bro Chat:
-Jigsaw (aka Razz): Sure, they can help keep eachother entertained.
-BlueBerry: Thank you!

***
Bookwyrm
Swapfell:
Razz: ... okay Papyrus. I need those entertainment procedures.
Slim: I mean, the spider would have been enough for me.
Razz: I know, but these two are not normal children.... maybe I can bake with them instead.

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: We are gonna have to stop at the True Lab to pick them up. Maybe we can make it a field trip?
Razz: Hmmmm.... I like the idea. Let us pick up some board games and brownie mix on the way though.

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz picks up Underswap Chara from the Universe Hopping Machine hidden in the True Lab. They have a day backpack with them.*
Razz: Human. Since there will be two Charas today, I will call you.... Thing 2.
Chara: ...... how about..... no?
Slim: ..... I have an idea. Rosy? For your cheeks? Or just Swap Chara... I guess. Um...

***
HomeHawk12
Chara: Call me Kara? It sounds close anyway.
Slim: I like that. Kara and Chara.
Razz: Hmmmmmm....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Why would my Chara keep their name? Are you trying to get on their good side?
Kara: No no, I just wanted to be polite.
Slim: ..... we can ask them for a nickname.
*Razz drives them to pick up Swapfell Chara.*

***
HomeHawk12
SFChara: You guys went to the Underground without me? *They are pouting.*
Razz: Why would you want to go back there anyway? Too much dust, and everyone was trying to kill you.
SFChara: I heard the monsters that stayed behind are nice now, and there were some places I didn’t get to explore because I was running for my life. I wanna see the machine!
Razz: ..... Perhaps when it is time to return Kara to their home.

***
Bookwyrm
*Chara is pouting a bit.*
Kara: I haven't been to a Fell universe yet.
Everyone is so spiky or scarred.
Razz: Don’t just wander up to monsters, Kara. They aren't nice like yours.

***
HomeHawk12
Kara: Can we explore the Underground? PLEAAAAASE! I wanna see all the differences!
Slim: We can make it a nature hike?
Razz: ..... get in the car, and don’t stray too far from me.

***
Bookwyrm
SFChara: ..... is that a yes-
Razz: Quiet down, I am trying to drive.
Kara: Can we listen to music?
Razz: Music distracts the driver.

***
HomeHawk12
SFChara: ..... THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER EEEEENNNNNDS~~~
Razz: I WILL TURN THIS CAR AROUND!

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: .... Can we just get along?
SFChara: I wanna be called Thor. So I can smite things!
Razz: No Chara, we aren't calling you Thor.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Your new nickname is “Carl.”
SFChara: I don’t wanna be Carl! That’s not fair! I don’t want a stupid nickname like yours!
Razz: *Slams the breaks and turns around to stare at them.* You’re RIGHT, it isn’t fair, but guess what? LIFE is not fair! Now you can shut up and accept your nickname, or we are going home!

***
Bookwyrm
Carl(Swapfell Chara): ..... fine. Can we get McDonalds?
Razz: Not if you want to explore the Underground.

***
HomeHawk12
*After arriving at the mountain and making their way through the entrance where the barrier once stood.*

Razz: Alright children. I am sure you are both familiar with the Throne Room….. Hm, it is far dustier than I remember....
Kara (Underswap Chara): Hey, the throne of your Toriel is different from ours. It looks really comfy.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Yes, I got it refurbished for the Queen’s comfort.
Kara: OMG Carl! You have to show me everywhere! I want to see what's different!

***
HomeHawk12
Carl: I haven’t even been everywhere. I was too busy trying to not die!
Kara: Let’s explore! *The two rush off despite Razz’s shouting.*
Razz: DON’T STRAY OUT OF SIGHT! NO RUNNING! THIS PLACE COULD BE BOOBY TRAPPED!!!!
Slim: They’re fine. They got us out the first time, remember?

***
Bookwyrm
Worried Uncles:
Razz: THERE COULD BE NEW TRAPS AND WE DON'T- GET BACK HERE!
Slim: ...... I’m sure they are fine.

***
HomeHawk12
Explorers:
Kara: Your Judgement Hall is so much creepier than mine was. Look at all the angles in the stain glass! And it’s purple!
Carl: What color was yours?
Kara. Yellow. Let’s check out the city!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Worried Uncles:
Razz: *Enters the Hall to see the two running out the other end.* DAMMIT YOU HOOLIGANS! PAPYRUS THEY LEFT THE HALL!

Explorers:
Carl: This is The Capital.
Kara: It’s a bit... sadder looking than mine.

***
HomeHawk12
Worried Uncles:
Slim: I told you they are gonna be fine.
Razz: I cannot lose Queen Toriel’s baby! Much less TWO OF HER BABIES!

Explores:
Carl: There aren’t a lot of happy places here.... though the Wishing Room was pretty peaceful.
Kara: Let’s check it out after Napstaton’s film sets and The Lab!

***
Bookwyrm
Explorers:
Carl: Kara, not that way! My Napps has death games and traps!
Kara: So did mine!
Carl: I don't know if we had the same death games.

Worried Uncles:
Razz: THOSE BRATS! THEY WON'T BE GETTING MCDONALD'S ON THE WAY BACK AT ALL!
Slim: They are just curious....
Razz: IT'S DANGEROUS!

***
HomeHawk12
Explorers:
*After barely making their way through several chain saws, flame throwers, and disco poison darts.*
Kara: Okay..... so the death traps you dealt with MAY have been worse than mine.
Carl: You think?!
Kara: There’s The Lab though! We made it! Have you been into the True Lab?
Carl: Not very far, since I was still running for my life and it got too dangerous. What’s down there?
Kara: The place where the machine is that brought me here, AND the place Blue and Stretch don’t like talking about.
Carl: ...I must see this magical place.

Worried Uncles:
Razz: I’VE LOST SIGHT OF THEM! WHICH PATH DID THEY TAKE?!?!
Slim: T-they’ll come back when they get bored.
Razz: YOU ARE A TERRIBLE BABYSITTER!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Explorers:
Kara: ....w-what is this place?!?... how are there so many stains?!? Is that dust real?!?
Carl: My Sans and Papyrus don't like it here. That’s all I know.

Worried Uncles:
Slim: Not like I'm getting paid. And technically you're the babysitter...... um.
Razz: YOU BRATS GET BACK HERE!
Slim: I don't think they will answer to that.

***
HomeHawk12
Explorers:
Kara: Oh good, an office that doesn’t have dust anywhere.
Carl: Except in these tiny vials.
Kara: What vials?
Carl: Behind this burnt painting. No idea why anyone would keep dust of all things behind a painting. *The vials are barely two inches tall with such a small trace of dust in each.*
Kara: There are so many of them.... they are all labeled something different.
Carl: Can we move on? I don’t like this place.

Worried Uncles:
Razz: HUMANS! PLEASE STOP AVOIDING ME!!!!
*Slim has given up on saying anything. He knows Razz has stopped paying attention.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Omg. Are those leftover experiment samples from Undyne or even the skele boys tests? I can't wait for the kiddos to go to Bittytale)

Explorers:
Kara: Why?
Carl: ..... Undyne.... was very cruel sometimes. Wanna see Snowdin?

***
HomeHawk12
(Could be one or the other.... possibly leaning more towards the second option djdnfk)

Explorers:
Kara: I thought you wanted to see the machine?
Carl: I do, but-
Kara: Then let’s look at it! It’s just down the hallway!
Carl: ... alright. Then we are checking out Snowdin. *Closes the painting's false door and follows.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Oh those kiddos!)

Explorers:
*The machine is so tempting to touch. So many buttons and shiny bits.*
Kara: See! Look how cool it is! Look! this is where my Papyrus put the code in!
Carl: Woah.

Worried Uncles:
*Razz ......didn't want to check The True Lab.... but that's the most likely place.*

***
HomeHawk12
Worried Uncles:
Slim: No. I-I’m not going down there. Not outside of the machine room. I refuse to explore it.
Razz: Brother! Either you help me look around or shut up and stay here! I will not lose her Majesty’s child!!!!
Slim: Y-y-you’re really okay.... exploring the True Lab!????
Razz: Of course not. But I don’t have a choice. We already checked Snowdin and Waterfall.... I’ll leave the decision up to you. We can split up and get in and out of there faster, or stick-
*Slim grips Razz’s arm for dear life. He takes a shortcut to the necessary elevator room. Getting in and out is otherwise hard, but doable. He isn’t gonna actively explore the place of all his bad memories.*
*Razz is secretly glad Slim is choosing to search with him.*

Explorers:
Carl: So, how does it work anyway?
Kara: Well, Stretch put this code into the machine. *Randomly clicks the number pad, putting in an unexplored code.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Ah yes. The kiddos are accidentally causing trauma to the skele boys.)

Worried Uncles:
*The two quickly go through, hoping to find the kids before dwelling too long. They get close to the machine room in time to hear a portal open.*

***
HomeHawk12
Worried Uncles:
Razz: NononoNoNONONO!!!!! *Razz books it down the hallway, tripping up Slim and dragging him since the younger refuses to let go. He gets to the door just as there is a final flash of light. The portal is gone. The kids are gone.*
Slim: M-maybe they just went back to Underswap. I’ll check the code... bro?
*Razz is just looking at the machine, eyelights out and face stuck in a hopeless grimace. He failed his Queen.... he doesn’t deserve to live anymore!!!*

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: Okay, okay. I’ll just write down the code. And hope there's a machine there.
Razz: ..... I will go. I don't care if it's immediate death. I'm going.

(I want to say the Sans that died in Bittytale would have to have dusted for making bitties, his machine only had to cross a wire to get it working again. Then they died before that happened and left the Underground dusty for the humans to find and excavate.)

Explorers:
*Kara and Carl find themselves in the city by Ebott Mountain. They were dropped right next to... what's a “Bitty Shop?”*

***
HomeHawk12
Underswap:
Razz: Hurry up and get it going.
Slim: I can’t.
Razz: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T?!
Slim: The machine has a cool down period between uses. Usually between thirty minutes to an hour.... bro?
*Razz stands up, heads to a corner and bonks his head into a wall. He has put himself into permanent time out.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bittyverse:
*The children peer into the window, seeing..... aquariums with little skeletons. They can’t make out the details too well.*
Kara: Are those little monsters in cages?!
Carl: Why are monsters being kept in cages??? The doors locked!
Kara: Sign says they don’t open for another twenty minutes. What should we do now?
Carl: .... I’m gonna ask mom. *Tries calling but it goes to an unknown number.*
Carl: She’s not picking up.
Kara: Daddy Asgore’s house isn’t too far from this street in my world. Maybe we can find this world’s Asgore and he can explain?
Carl: Good idea. Lead the way.

(Little do they know..... the slow talking, explosion loving terrors that live under the couch of the supposed Asgore’s house....)

***
Bookwyrm
Bittyverse:
Kara: ..... Why is it abandoned? There isn't any gardening supplies or anything!?!
Carl: The lock is broken. We can check it out.

(Good thing both children have a sixth sense for directions. There wasn't any maps Underground.)

Swapfell:
Razz: *Moping in his corner.* Puppy, the Queen is going to kill me. And you. And Lord Hater is going to enjoy Alphy’s house more.
Slim: .....*cannot compute, what is Razz doing???*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: ... That bitch always had nicer things than me.... *Sniffle.*
Slim: Bro?
Razz: DON’T YOU GET IT?!?! I FAILED MY FUNCTION!!!! I WAS BUILT TO SERVE THE QUEEN AND I FAILED TO PROTECT HER CHILD LIKE SHE ASKED ME TO! AND I’M A FAILURE!!!!! *Smacks his forehead hard enough into the drywall to crack it.* I deserve to have my dust dumped into a latrine.....

Bittyverse:
Kara: ..... hello? *Steps inside. It has very dusty furniture inside, and there are broken things all over the floor. They hear a scurrying noise somewhere near the living room.*

***
Bookwyrm
Swapfell:
Slim: .... it's not that bad. They can't get into too much trouble. And we will get them right back. I still think you can do it. The Queen will understand….. please machine, just work!
Razz: Alphys will have lots of toys and be able to buy a fancy cat tower… *Sniff.*

Bittyverse:
Kara: .... it's so..... sad here. There's nothing. Just a few left over furniture and some little things on the floor.
Carl: .... I don't like being here. This place is weird. Let's go back.
Kara: ..... this isn't my universe at all.
*The two don't notice when they get stowaways. Carl still has their day bag with them. They don't know they have two someones enjoying the soul recharge.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bittyverse:
Kara: At least that killed enough time for the shop to open.
Carl: Let’s check it out then,
*Stow always hears the word “shop.” They can get supplies here. Maybe fabric and wrapped snacks. Perfect.*

Swapfell:
Slim: Just a few more minutes and the machine will be recharged. *Looks to Razz, who has since taken a seat in the fetal position holding his knees and staring with void sockets at the wall. He wasn’t handling this well.*

***
Bookwyrm
Swapfell:
*Ding!*
*Razz scrambles up to practically push Slim to the machine.*
Razz: NOW NOW NOW NOW NOOOOW!

Bittyverse:
*Kara was looking at the tiny monsters while Carl was asking the employee if this was a slave shop.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bittyverse:
Employee: Slave shop?! No no! This is a Bitty Pet shop. What would give you that idea?
Carl: Because they are fully intelligent talking monsters that are literally holding full conversations with my friend. My sixth grade teacher says when someone owns basically another person, then that’s slavery.
*Employee is now completely freaked out by the red-eyed weird child.*

Kara: Are you guys okay? Do you need help?
Rus Bitty: Hello human!!! Are you here to adopt us?
Blue Bitty: I promise I’ll be the best Bitty ever! We can play all sorts of games!
Comic Bitty: .... zzzzzzz......
Rus Bitty 2: Do you like dress up? I’ll wear whatever you want me to! I wasn’t as willing with my first human, but I’m better now I promise!

***
Bookwyrm — 12/05/2020
(Oh no Rus 2. Buddy)

Bittyverse:
Kara: .... How do you feel about a jail break?

Carl: .... are these papers on how to care for your slave? *Picks up a bitty pamphlets.* You know that slavery is wrong, right?
Employee: Where are your parents?
Carl: Probably dead.

*The two passengers are snagging things to steal and putting them in Carl’s bag, luckily Carl had put it down.*

Worried Uncles:
*Razz and Slim pop into existence outside the store.*
Razz: *Kicks the door in.* CHARA! BOTH OF YOU! GET OVER HERE NOW!

(Dude the humans are gonna freak when they see Razz and Slim)

***
HomeHawk12
(Dang, Razz and Slim coming in clutch with their appearance right next door lmao)

*The two stowaways find specialty food, Bitty sized boots, vest and cowboy hats. Those immediately get yeeted into the bag. They settle and sit low hearing the employee getting irritated.*

*Employee looks up and screams upon seeing the two large skeletons, running into the back room to call authorities. Kara is quickly trying to coax the caged Bitty’s into their day pack.*

*Razzs sees the tiny skeletons, doing a double take.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .....Papyrus, I don't like this universe. Children, we are leaving.
*Slim is fascinated with the tiny skeletons.*
Kara: Look! There's so many of them!
Razz: Leave them. Carl, Kara, get over here now or I will pull you with blue magic. Papyrus. Get ready to take us to the Underground. We are going to go even if we die trying.

***
HomeHawk12
Kara: Wait! I still need to get the others- *Razz pulls them in with blue magic.*
*Carl grabs their bag and rushes over, just in time for Slim to teleport them to True Lab.*
Razz: Thank goodness the machine is here.

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: ... it's dusty but pretty much usable. Just a bit of changes needed.
Razz: WHAT DID YOU TWO THINK YOU WERE DOING?!? THAT WAS RECKLESS IRRESPONSIBLE AND YOU COULD HAVE NEVER GOTTEN BACK! WHAT IF THERE WASN'T A MACHINE HERE?!? THIS IS WHY WE DON'T HOP INTO RANDOM UNIVERSES!

***
HomeHawk12
Carl: .... we didn’t realize we had turned it on.... we just pressed some buttons and-
Razz: AND WHAT?! YOU THOUGHT IT WOULDN’T DO ANYTHING?!?! YOU KNOW THAT’S HOW KARA GOT HERE!!!
Carl: I-
Razz: I THOUGHT YOU WERE TRANSPORTED TO A HELL DIMENSION! OR MAYBE ONE OF NOTHING BUT CANNIBALS!!! I THOUGHT I LET YOU TWO DIE!!!!
Kara: *Sniffle.*
Carl: *Tearing up.* W-we’re sorry.... we didn’t mean to worry you....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: You have to think about the consequences. You could have never come back. There could be universes where there isn't a machine! The one time I went to an unknown universeI almost died, I was dropped from thousands of feet in the air. Stretch encountered Axe and Traps, the only reason he is alive is because he had an omelet!
*The kiddos are about in tears.*
Razz: .... I hope you have learned your lessons. I never want you two exploring anything on my watch WITHOUT me there. You can't just run through the Underground on your own. The few who stayed could have put new traps up and there's no Guard here to keep them in line!

***
HomeHawk12
Carl: Y-yes Grunkle Sans.....
*Razz feels the slightest tinge of guilt, thinking maybe he went too far, but knowing they would be more likely to remember a dramatic lesson.*
Razz: Very well, I will expect you to follow my instructions in the future, OTHERWISE I will not be willing to watch you children in the future. Do I make myself clear?
^Carl and Kara both nodded.*
Slim: Good news. Machine is up and running. We.... really got lucky the problem was simple enough for me to fix. Otherwise, we would have been stranded with no way of communicating with any other universe.
*Razz’s magic drains as soon as he realizes what a massive mistake he had made in wanting to rush into a new universe after the kids.... with no guarantee that they had a way back and not informing anyone else.....*
Razz: Well, let’s not waste time then. Everyone get onto the pad.

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz almost sheepdog herds the children out of the Underground. Slim was tired from the sudden shortcut with so many passengers.*

Underswap Skeleton House:
*None of them noticed the stowaways that escaped in the bag with their goods to run under the couch. Lord Hater, Razz’s pet cat, saw them, but the couch is too low to get under.^
Carl: .... I got some pamphlets. Want to read about the tiny slaves?

***
HomeHawk12
(Not gonna lie, i low key love that we’ve turned the whole Bitty concept from its cute caregiving origins into the fact that these people are essentially buying tiny intelligent monsters and treating them as pets. The real horror of the universe.)
(Did Kara make it out with any others in their bag?)

Razz: Tiny slaves?
Carl: The tiny skeletons in that slave store that looked like you and Dunkle Papyrus. They sell them as little tiny pet slaves.
*Hands him a pamphlet.*
Razz: “A Guide to Your New Pet Bitty Skeleton: What You Need to Know”....... this is barbaric.

**^
Bookwyrm
(The two on Carl are Drawl and Tart. I didn't have any idea if Kara got any. I'm pretty sure store Bitties are told to not just run off with people. Can't just have your merchandise sneeking off. Probably some sort of easily gotten license is needed to own a Bitty.)

Slim: *Reading the pamphlets along with Razz*....... oh god.
Razz: Tiny monsters are still monsters! And this thing about needing proximity to souls to recharge themselves? Horrid. At least they can survive if they band together to share soul power. That is a despicable way of making sure they stay in the stores and not run away.

***
HomeHawk12
(Well.... I did have two ideas for more stowaways.... just adding to the sadness)

Slim: How can they even create such things?
Razz: God, I really hope they didn’t come upon that world’s version of whatever experiment files were left over. I’d hate if that somehow contributed.
Slim: What’s that on the back?
Razz: “Coming Spring of next year, own your very own Bitty Goat couple?!” How DARE they make a mockery of her Majesty in such a way!

***
HomeHawk12
(Actually make that three stowaway ideas.... one foreshadowing for potential future AU’s)

Kara: .... why is the cat so obsessed with the couch?
Carl: Maybe a treat fell underneath? I’ll check. *Leans down to look underneath the couch.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Like, if a Bitty gets returned once’s, it’s put into a discount aquarium. A second return means something could be wrong with them so they just stick them in a freezer or something to dust and keep the excess any malfunctioning ones down.... and Kara was grabbing Bitty’s from a discount aquarium where they knew what would happen to them if things failed a second time...)

***
Bookwyrm
(Ooooooooh. ......what would we pick? BeastTale? And yikes corporate policy. Like the Bitties don't even get the decency of a designated freezer, just next to the ice cream and frozen breakfast sandwiches. There is a difference between these kinds of returns tho. Corporate doesn't really care all that much.)

*Carl hears some scratches when they try looking down.*
Carl: SANS! I THINK THERE'S A MOUSE!

***
HomeHawk12
(One of them has to be Outertale Sans, since they have the floating powers if I remember right, and just the thought seems adorable to me (Previous owners/parents got tired of it not coming down from the ceiling fan when kids wanted to play with it so it got returned). Second was Bitty Rus 2, thinking it was going to be a proper purchase and climbing in eager for a second chance, and hopefully not going to die in a freezer that he has seen happen. The next one I was less certain on. I was thinking a Boss Bitty that maybe had visual impairments/blindness and acted out more like an Edgy by chewing on things to hide his disability and be left alone just to get returned. He got dragged into Kara’s bag not knowing what the hell was happening.)

***
Bookwyrm
(So a fluffy floofy outer Sans. A precious Rus, and a very confused smol Boss?)

***
HomeHawk12
(Could have even lost his eyesight in an illegal Bitty fighting ring. Yep, that’s what I’m honking if you are cool with it)

***
Bookwyrm
(I'll honk that too)
(Maybe the Boss only has poor vision in one eye, none in the other?)

***
HomeHawk12
(That can work! He can see dark shapes/colors in the one socket and he can only manifest one hazy eyelight. Poor baby just freaks out when he meets the cat.)

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: A MOUSE!? I’LL KILL IT!!!!
*Peers under the couch, lifting it up some to get a better look. Kara sneaks off to the bathroom with their pack while Razz is distracted.*
Kara: *Locks the bathroom door and unzips their bag.* Don’t worry, you guys will be free here. We need nicknames for you guys though.
OuterSans Bitty: ....zzzzzz....
Rus Bitty: A new name already!?
Boss Bitty: ...... *Sitting, hugging his knees scared and not sure why the ground is so unstable.*

(Not gonna lie I kinda want to name the Boss Bitty Ranger because 1) it’s bad ass and it will piss Tart off. 2) Ironic since he’s almost completely blind.)

***
Bookwyrm — 12/05/2020
(.....or Peepers, but that's just cruel. I like Ranger. Maybe ...... I dunno for the Papy, but maybe Floof for the Outer Sans?)

***
HomeHawk12 — 12/05/2020
(Floof for Outer sounds good. We could use Peepers for the Rus? It’s cute. Or perhaps Linguini?)

***
Bookwyrm
(I like Linguini. Or Noodle? Maybe Dente?)

***
HomeHawk12
(Dente lmao. my sister has a cat named Noodle funny enough.)

***
Bookwyrm — 12/05/2020
(I can vibe with food named cats. I have Creampuff. Dente then?)

Bathroom:
*The Outer Bitty is snoozing.*
Boss Bitty: ..... where.... are we?
Kara: In Swapfell! Razz is very good at taking care of monsters. I heard he was very strong to take care of Slim. Surely he can do a good job for you!

***
HomeHawk12
(I am cool with Dente! Floof, Dente, and Ranger?)

***
Bookwyrm
(Ye!)

***
HomeHawk12
Boss Bitty: .... What's Swapfell?
Kara: Nicknames first! Once you have names, Razz can’t say no to you staying. Hmmm..... I’m thinking a pasta related name for you, how about Dente?
Rus: Wowie! I like that name! So much nicer then my first one!
Kara: What was your first name?
Dente: Dumb-Dumb! My owners said I.... wasn’t very smart.

***
Bookwyrm
Bathroom:
Kara: Well now you won't have to be called that! What about you, mini Edge?
Boss: ...... Do you mean me?
Kara: I think Ranger would be cool! You look like you could be an army person!
Ranger: ...... you...think?
Outer: ZZZZZ *Starts floating.*
Kara: Okay so-
*knock knock.*
Razz: .... everything okay with your human functions, Kara?

***
HomeHawk12
Bathroom:
Kara: I’m fine! Just..... this is gonna take a few more minutes!
Razz: *Makes a grossed out noise.* Don’t tell me about it! Just.... don’t drown in the toilet or whatever.
Kara: I won’t! *Grabs Outer Bitty out of the air. He blinks his sockets open.*
Outer: Huh, when did I get here?
Kara: I rescued you guys! Don’t worry, you are safe.
Outer: Huh..... ok..... zzzzz....
Kara: Imma call you Floof, because your tiny hoodie is extra poofy. *Sets him down next to the Little Rus. Floof is the only one dressed nicely. Dente had no shoes and is wearing a long sweater/dress and very ugly pink shorts. Ranger was in a tattered green short sleeve shirt and baggy little pants, no shoes either.*
Kara: What happened to you guys? You weren’t dressed like the other little monsters.... except Floof.
Dente: He had just been returned the night before..... we are the used, on sale Bitties.....

***
Bookwyrm
Bathroom:
Kara: Well....you don't have to be there any more! That's sad and awful and now you won't have to deal with it anymore!

Living Room:
Carl: Slim I swear there was a mouse!
Slim: ..... I don't see anything under the couch.

***
HomeHawk12
Living Room:
Carl: Maybe under the cushions? *Slim takes all the cushions off. Seeing a hole in the fabric that he didn’t remember.*
Slim: ..... what could have made that?
Carl: The mouse! I told you I saw a mouse!

*Kara steps out of the bathroom, finding Razz in the kitchen..*
Kara: Grunkle Razz? I have something very important to tell you.
Lord Hater spots about twelve articles of tiny clothing getting dragged under the sofa from the back, rushing over to catch it but missing.*
LH: MROW!!!
Carl: Where is it girl?! Catch it!

***
Bookwyrm
Living Room:
Slim: ...... okay so maybe there is a mouse. We can wait it out.
Carl: Can I keep it?!?
Slim: ..... we can trap it then we can see.

Kitchen:
Razz: Yes Kara? Is everything okay?
Kara: ...yeees. I have someone’s that I want you to meet!

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Razz: *Sockets narrow in suspicion*...... what do you mean, “someone’s?”
Kara: Well..... *Gently sets the backpack on the table. Razz is preparing for an army of spiders from the other realm to come out.*
Kara: Come on.... it’s okay, I promise.... *Sticks their hand into the bag, Dente climbing onto it and letting them lift him out.*
Razz: I told you to leave those things there!!!
Kara: He is not a thing, and his name is Dente.
Dente: H-hello! I-I know I was a bad Bitty at my first home, but I promise I am better! I will organize your pens or play dress up whenever you want! A-and you can put me on a toy car and drop me from wherever and I won’t jump out... e-even if you roll it really fast down the stairs! Can I stay?!
Razz: ...... Kara-
Kara: Hold on! There’s more.

Living Room:
*Carl hears the crinkling of plastic, seeing a bag of bitty food attempting to be pulled under the sofa. Something is cursing in a high pitched voice.*

***
Bookwyrm
(That's totally Tart. Aaaaaaaaaa)

Kitchen:
Razz: .......*knows already that he doesn't have the soul to put these poor monsters out*.......
Kara: *Pulls out a shaky Ranger, who is trying his hardest to look around and tell where the hell he is.* This is Ranger! He looks super cool!
Ranger: *Flushes.* Oh. Thank you I guess.
Kara: *Fushes for floof, but he floated out and above them already* .....Floof?
Razz: ....pfft. *Pokes the little cloud boy.*

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Floof: ..... zzzzz..... *Doesn’t respond other than a lazy swat at his finger, floating all the way up and bumping the ceiling.*
Razz: I can’t believe you stole them.
Kara: Saved them! And you read how horrible those pamphlets were! These guys were in the clearance area as “used goods.”
Razz: “Used goods?”
Kara: They decided something was wrong with them because they all got returned! If they get returned a second time they go straight to the freezer!
Razz: *Looks at the little creatures questioningly.* Is this true? They stick you in a freezer to die?
Dente: .... y-yes..... please don’t send me back there, I don’t want to die.....
Kara: So can we keep them????
Razz: Honestly I’m more concerned how the cat will treat them. You may have to take them back to your home world if it won’t work.... then again, her Majesty loves caring for tiny cute things..... she may accept them with open arms....

Living Room:
Carl: Passt, look! *Points Slim to the bag of stuck food.*
Slim: *Decides to catch the little bugger with blue magic.*

(Poor Ranger is so meek and scared for a Boss I feel so bad for him djdnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
(I mean he is in an unknown place, with unknown people that seem to have taken him far away from any sort of Bitty place. He needs to keep a soul source around.)

Kitchen:
Kara: Oh my God do you think mom would let me!?!?
Razz: ... if not, you can ask Blue. I will take them as a last resort.
Kara: I love them already! I need to call mom right now!

Living Room:
Slim: .....*pulls out....himself?*
Drawl: .......hey y’all....... fancy meetin' ya here.

***
HomeHawk12
(It would be so cute just watching him build up his confidence..... maybe somebody gives him a little walking stick once the truth about his disability comes out.)

Kitchen:
Kara: *Pulls out their phone and starts calling.*
Razz: *Focuses on Ranger. He is still seated on the table, not looking around curiously or even attempting to find hiding spots. It was odd..... unless…*
Dente: So what shall we refer to you as, master? W-wait, what are you doing? Don’t touch him like that!

Living Room:
Carl: ...... it’s you, and it talks funny.
Slim Bitty (Drawl): Now now, I may be a simple Bitty, born and raised under this here sofa, but I do know when someone’s bein’ rude ta me.
Slim:...... I am pretty sure Razz never had a mini version of me living in his sofa before now.... at least I hope he didn’t.
*Carl can practically hear someone groaning in irritation under the sofa.*

***
Bookwyrm
(He hides his "defect". He doesn't want to be seen as broken)

Kitchen:
Razz: .... I just wanted to ask if he needed a hand up. And I am not... a master.... you are monsters. Just smaller than my universes. And you have health needs. You have a right and a choice here. If you don't want to go with Kara you can ....stay here. My name is Sans, but monsters from other universes call me Razz.

Living Room:
Razz Bitty (Tart): YOU JUST HAD TO GET CAUGHT! *Slides with difficulty out of the couch.* SO! *Hands on hips.* WHAT NOW? ARE WE GOING FIGHT FOR THIS SPACE OR WHAT?
Slim: ..... you are adorable.
Razz Bitty: NO I AM NOT!!!

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Ranger: H-help?* Glances towards Razz’s form with his barely working eyelight, seeing a fuzzy dark shape that he could only hope was Razz’s hand. He reaches for it, surprised at not feeling skin. He doesn’t say anything, trying to hide his disability, but it’s enough for Razz to confirm his suspicions.*
Razz: I’m a fellow skeleton monster, not some human wanting to own monsters to make themselves feel superior. You are safe here.
Ranger: .... safe..... safe here..... are you a giant Bitty?
Razz: Stop with this Bitty nonsense. Here you are among fellow monsters only.

Living Room:
Slim: ..... Why do you want to live in the sofa of all places?
Carl: Yeah, I’m pretty sure Grunkle Sans would be upset about loose food in the cushions.
Tart: THAT’S IT! PUT EM UP! LETS THROW DOWN!!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Kitchen:
Razz: this is Swapfell. There are a few other universes we are in contact with. You have choices okay?
Dente: Oh ....oh goodness.
Kara: Mom said she doesn't see why not! Do you want to come with me? You can visit here a lot too! Or just visit me! I'm so excited to have new friends!
Floof: .....cool.
Kara: I’m sure we can get you new clothes too! I think there's people that make doll clothes that can be your size!

Living Room:
Slim: .... do you... want to stay here?
Razz Bitty: PUT DRAWL DOWN FIRST!
Drawl: *Lounging on Slim’s hand, soaking up some soul time*... naw… you don't gotta do that anytime soon big boy.

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Ranger: ... can I stay here... for now? It feels better being with a monster, not a human and their human mother. *He’s had enough of humans.*
Floof: Does your ma make good pie?
Kara: Of course!
Floof: Nice! I’d love ta meet the lady.

Living Room:
Carl: *Grabs little Tart by the back of his stained tattered shirt. He hasn’t had a chance to change yet.*
Tart: PUT ME DOWN AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN!!!!
Drawl: Relax bro. It’s nice to feel this.... nice.

***
Bookwyrm
Living Room:
Slim: ...what... how... you look just like me and my brother!
Drawl: ....I’m basically what's known as a Slim Jim. A Papyrus type. Not the usual Slim Jim. Neither. Not everyone has my way a' talkin'. That down there is a Raspberry. Sans type. The latest name he got was Tart. We are usually marketed as a complimentary set. Like most Sans or Papyrus types. *Makes himself super at home on Slim’s hand, he knows he's cute.*

Kitchen:
Razz: Ok. That’s fine. You will have to tell me if I am not providing enough or you need anything. Those pamphlets probably won't have exactly what you will need or want.
Ranger: ....oh. I'll try then. I will need a small space all my own.
Razz: .... I thought that was a given? You are a person. You deserve privacy.

***
HomeHawk12
(Btw I started doodling, see if you can figure out who they are lol)

***
Bookwyrm
(Ranger looks so tired. But that’s probably just him squinting. Tart and his lil trap bits! Drawl looks so chill)

***’
HomeHawk12
(Drawl is just the chillest ever. It’s hard to see since he’s in the background, but Ranger is fiddling with his new scarf feeling the texture. He pretty much squints at everything. His eyes are trained to do that lol. I love Tart with a big bow for some reason lmao.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Because it’s damn adorable. Look at the bow on him it has to be big, everything’s bigger on a bitty!)
(Dude. Imagine when Tart encounters Legos. Like omg)

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart is the most industrial little Lego fiend ever born.)

Kitchen:
Razz: *Going over the pamphlet with Ranger seated by his arm, Razz taking notes.* I can’t believe they call for a rabbit style hutch or aquarium for when the humans are gone.
Ranger: It’s supposed to keep us out of trouble when you aren’t home.... I know some people make dollhouses for their Bitties. I would be okay with a shoebox if you have any.....
Razz: Would you be okay finding the shoebox?
Ranger: *Defensive.* Of course I can! *Winces as soon as he realized he raised his voice.* I-I mean.... sorry. I shouldn’t yell.
Razz: *Already trying to figure out if he knows anyone that can build a tiny little house or room that was safe for a tiny blind monster.*

Living Room:
Tart: Stop that!
Carl: What?
Tart Don’t you dare say it!
Carl: ..... Tart?
Tart: DAMMIT I SAID NO!

***
Bookwyrm
(The lil guy really only needs a Lego set a month. And maybe a starter set once he gets ideas. He would build his own fortress eventually and move in once he gets enough Legos. Drawl "helps" him. The bright patterns from the legos make it easy for Ranger to walk around it. And battery string lights keep it lit)

Razz: *Has had experience finding weaknesses, he recognizes blindness.* It says here that you need soul time.
Ranger: ... I can survive well enough if there's three or more bitties, but a bitty can't live alone for long. The tiny soul bits we have destabilize and we dust. A large complete soul helps us maintain our soul pieces.
Razz: How long is safe? I am a firefighter, is it a few hours or?

Living Room:
Tart: DRAWL YOU KNOW I DON'T ENJOY THAT NAME! WHY DID YOU TELL THEM!
Drawl: Your first name is special. Lotta Bitties would love the name ya got.
Slim: ... hey bro! You should see this!

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Ranger: We can usually last about a day, maybe two at most, but we will be very weak for that second day.
Razz: Hmmmmm.... maybe I can take you to the station occasionally? I wouldn’t want you left alone for as long as my shifts can be-
Slim: Bro! Get out here! You gotta see these things!
Razz: Well, I suppose you should meet my brother, and the cat while we’re at it. Be sure to bully her a bit so she knows you aren’t a toy. She never listens to me.
Ranger: O-oh.... okay.
*Razz picks up his new charge and walks to the living room. Kara is too busy babbling about their mom to Floof and Dente to even notice.*
Razz: You should see what I have.... too..... *Sees the other little Bitties Slim and Carl found.*
Slim: So, guess who moved inside the sofa?
Tart: HEY! WHO ARE THE OTHER UGLY ASSHOLES MOVING ONTO OUR TURF! YOU AREN’T WELCOME HERE!
Ranger: Sorry.... I didn’t know others already lived here....
Razz: It is news to me. Who are these other..... wait, why does he look just like you.... and me?!

(Bro, that sounds like the coolest bachelor pad ever. Razz would just keep buying Legos since Ranger can somewhat use the colors to get around)
(Awwww, Tart and Drawl letting Ranger slowly into their Buddy group. He has soul stabilizers at least.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Bitty pack dynamics. The Fells stick together when not trying to stab each other)

***
Bookwyrm
Kitchen:
Kara: *On the phone with her mom Swapfell Toriel (aka Regalia).* I got them because me and Carl went exploring. That made grunkle Razz super mad and they need us! *Sets down the phone on speaker so the Bitties can speak to her.*
Floof: Hmmmm. Hey there. The kid calls me Floof.
Dente: H-Hello! They named me Dente!
Regalia: ..... I can't just leave out monsters that need help. I will speak more with them once my meetings are over. You be nice to Razz, Chara.

Living Room:
Razz: Were you stolen too?
Drawl: *Looks up from his sprawling on Slim’s!hand.*Nah. We came from you couch. Made in-between the fluff and springs. Real couch potatoes. Home grown.
Razz: ...
Tart: DRAWL THAT WAS SO BAD!
Razz: You definitely weren't here yesterday.
Ranger: ........*is trying to pretend he can see them*

***
HomeHawk12
(Can’t believe I didn’t think of this earlier. Since the rolls of everyone are swapped would Kara’s primary care taker be Asgore? Carl is special since their parents are remarried so I didn’t even consider that.)

Kitchen:
Kara: Okay mom! I’ll be super good! Hangs up. I’m so excited!!!! We are gonna have the best slumber party!

Living Room:
Ranger: ...... I..... do I know you guys?
Drawl; Come on, you’d remember this accent.
Ranger: That’s why I’m asking.....
Razz: You probably came from the same slave shop.
Tart: Honestly we’ve met so many Boss Bitties in our early days you all blend together..... you two walked into a drug den. When the original homeowners aban- left, homeless people started using the house a lot to sleep.

***
Bookwyrm
(Regalia definitely trying for brownie points. Swapgore still has that thing for Stretch.)
(Oh no Kara and Carl walked into a drug den)

Living Room:
Drawl: Easy way to get some soul time. When the people are that vulnerable or too drunk to notice.
Ranger: Someone picked me up from the store and took me.
Drawl: That store was a gold mine.
Tart: DRAWL! STOP GIVING AWAY OUR SECRETS

***
HomeHawk12
Living Room:
Razz: Gold mine?
Tart: DAMMIT YOU GAVE THE GAME AWAY!!!!
Razz: Would you be willing to share some of your supplies for Ranger? I’m afraid I don’t plan on revisiting your world any time soon, and I’m still trying to figure out what he needs.
Drawl: What’s in it for us?
Razz: You guys will get free food from me every time I cook. Nice warm variety.
Drawl: ....... fresh food bro. What do you think?
Tart: ..... I suppose we can spare some clothes..... and monster pellets..... you don’t get anything else though!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: ......
Tart:........
Razz: Deal.
Slim: ......okay, those two staring each other down was pretty adorable so.... I want to set up something for you? You should probably meet Monica too.....
Tart: .... who?

(Kara totally asked mom because mom really wants to be a fun parent.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh yes that makes total sense ggddhj)
Drawl: Okay, I’ll lead Ranger to our stash and he can pick while we meet the lady.
Ranger: Uhhhh-
Tart: DON’T REVEAL THE LOCATION OF OUR SUPPLIES! We will bring our things out for Ranger to choose from.
Ranger: *Breathes a sigh of relief.*
LH: Mrow!
Tart: You stay out of this, fowl beast!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .....*Decides to let Tart find out about Monica in retaliation for insulting his cat.*
Slim: She’s in my room. *Sets Drawl next to the couch*
*Razz gently lowers Ranger to the ground.*

***
HomeHawk12
(And the Tarantula is as big as Tart is dchnbdzvu)

Living Room:
*Tart brings out the stuff he’s willing to part with. (cowboy themed clothes are off limits.)*
Drawl: See anything you like? Don’t be shy.
Ranger: Uhhhh.... do you have any scarves?
Drawl: .... Right in front of ya buddy.
Ranger: O-oh.... I was just testing you of course.....
Drawl: Right.... come on bro. Let’s meet the lady. Leave Ranger to his decision making.
*Tart: Hops onto Slim’s hand alongside Drawl.* Very well, let us meet her.

***
Bookwyrm
*Ranger, once he feels alone, starts feeling the fabric of the clothes.*

*A scream is heard from Slim’s room. A tiny body is running straight back for the couch.*

Drawl: *Still looking at the tarantula with Slim*.... think I could ride her?
Slim: .... I could ask Muffet if she has any saddles or could make one....

Tart: WHERE IS MY BLADE!?! WHERE IS IT!?! HERE! *Pulls out a 1 inch knife. More like a sword to the Bitty.*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Hold on now. *Grabs Tart with Blue magic.* I don’t enjoy the spider either, but it receives similar treatment to the cat. Respect it and don’t kill it. If it tries playing with you, bully it a bit to back off, that’s it.
Tart: IT’S AS BIG AS I AM!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I am sorry to say it’s not the only thing like that in the world. You could probably train Lord Hater. I think that is up to your skills?
Tart: IT’S A BIG CAT.
Ranger: .... I would like these ones please.
Razz: Oh, and there's another tall skeleton that needed a few clothes.
Tart: UUUUUUUUUGH. JUST RAID MY STASH I GUESS!

***
HomeHawk12
*Razz brought Dente in to have his pick.*
Dente: *Excited to prove himself.* Did you wish to play dress up Mister Razz? I promise I am a lot better about it now! What would you like me to put on first???

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: It’s not that Dente. Tart has agreed to let you have some of their extra clothes since we won't be able to shop for you just yet. Pick what you like. Everyone should be able to have clean clothes.
Tart: That pile there is what I'll part with. We were going to trade it to other Bitties, but apparently there isn't any here.

***
HomeHawk12
Dente: I..... I can have whatever I want?
Tart: You get a shirt, pants, and an accessory! That is all!
Dente: No ones let me choose before.....

***
HomeHawk12
(I need to add Floof and Dente lol. Just don’t know what Dente is wearing yet. Gave Ranger a thicker scarf and no more shoes.)

***
Bookwyrm
(I am all for Dente finding a knit sweater. Tart and Drawl were not only getting stuff for them but to trade too. A knit sweater is good for warmth. And Floof has on the normal outer Sans stuff.)
Tart: .... the jeans are sturdy. Drawl and I don't collect crap.
Dente: Wowie!!

(I kinda like the idea of a baseball cap for Dente. And none of his stuff matches in color. Cuz he's a cool dude.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Pffft, love it. Total cool dude outfit for Dente similar to the cannon one. Floof was a new Bitty that was sold and returned a week later for spending more time on the ceiling then with the children. I’ve already thought way too much on all five of their potential backstories....
I picture Ranger in a long sleeve jacket and baggy jeans cuz he doesn’t like feeling exposed. The new scarf is now his comfort blanket. Colours don’t match because he can’t see them well..... Dente thinks he’s also a cool dude.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Ranger likes being called a cool dude. Makes him blush. He can't tell if he is blushing or not.)

***
HomeHawk12
(OMFG that is too adorable I didn’t even consider that. The only Edge that would actively blush without getting angry, Cuz he doesn’t even know it happens)

Dente: OKAY EVERYONE! I AM READY!!! *Presents himself in a bright orange knit sweater that hangs below his pelvis, the olive green jeans Tart had shown him, bulky pink boots and a light blue baseball cap.* W-what do you all think???
Razz: You are.... very colourful.
Floof: Looking good buddy. thumbs up. Like a real cool dude.
Dente: REALLY???? You think I’m a cool dude???
Floof: Of course.
Dente: What do you think Ranger?

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: … um. It’s..... acceptable.
Dente: OH MY GOD THAT’S HIGH PRAISE FROM A BOSS!
Ranger: *Red dusts his face*… it’s not that great of praise....
***
HomeHawk12
Floof: Awwww, our local Boss is actually not as big of a prick. Who would of thought.
Ranger: Leave me alone! *Now his face is getting redder for a whole different reason.*
Tart: If you are quite done! I’ll be taking my things back! *Grabs his clothing pile and drags them into the couch den.*
Razz: Is it.... really necessary for you to live inside the couch?
Drawl: It’s actually super spacious down there. Two wood frames in the center can even act as room dividers. You’re couch doesn’t have much stuffing though. Hard to make a bed without it.
Razz: .... I’ll stop at the craft store later. *Grabs a notepad and pen.* What else do you need?
Tart: Wait, you’re actually going to shop for us?
Razz: If you need supplies, I’d rather not have you ripping up more furniture to get it.
Dente: WE GET TO GO ON A SHOPPING TRIP!

***
Bookwyrm
(I hope if the Bitties come with, someone asks if they are Razz’s and Slim's children.)

Razz: I don't have a lot of spare cash, but we can make it more livable for you all at least.

***
HomeHawk12
Kara: Mom gave me spending money! I can help! *Pulls out a $20 bill.*
Carl: I have $5! We can go through the doll section and buy tiny furniture!
Razz: *Makes a note to check the fairy garden section at the craft store.*
Slim: Wait, we are actually going?
*Ranger is getting nervous. He doesn’t want to be left alone is a house with a cat.*

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: … oh wait.... there aren't Bitty Stores here... we can't go.
Razz: ...why not?
Dente: Most stores don't like Bitties in them. It’s a lia-bil-ity.
Razz: The stores here don't have those rules.
Dente: *Sparkle sockets.* REALLY!?! DOES THAT MEAN I CAN GO?!?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Sure, but ONLY if you all stay close to me or Slim. If the Kids wanna run off with any of you, don’t!
Ranger: Uh.... Mister Razz? *He has his hand held up slight hoping Razz would move his direction.*
Razz: Hold on. *Grabs a small, one shouldered backpack and hooks it across his torso so the bag itself is on his chest.* If you would like to come you are more than welcome.

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: ... oh. Um…… *can't make a comment, he doesn't know what Razz did*....Mister Razz?
Razz: This backpack will help keep you safe! It will be easier for you to stay safe and get my attention
Tart: ...ropes or ladders would be nice to get around.
Drawl: The cool guys don't even need shortcuts.

***
HomeHawk12 — 12/06/2020
(Just gonna say I love fairy garden miniatures. Look at this cuteness!!!!)

Tart: No, THE LAZY ONES TAKE SHORTCUT!
Dente: I CAN BE LOUD TOO!
Razz: *Helps Ranger get into the backpack while everyone is distracted.*
Razz: Excuse me, but do you guys want to go, or stay here and bicker all day!
Kara: *Holds out their emptied day backpack.* Into the bag guys! I’m too excited!

**************

Meet The Bitties!

(From Left to Right. Tart, Ranger, Drawl, Dente, and Floof)

See better quality image here!

Chapter Text

***
Bookwyrm
*Dente chooses Kara’s bag and Slim deposits Drawl in Razz’s. Tart decides Razz isn't going fast enough, the blade has a yarn strap and he slings it over his shoulder. Then starts climbing mount Razz.*

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: *Situates himself on top of Razz’s head. He kicks his head with his boot like Razz is a horse.* ONWARD STEED! HYAHH!!!!!
Razz: ..... I need to drive. Either get into my bag or Kara’s.
Tart: YOU ARE A HORRIBLE STEED!

***
HomeHawk12
Carl: Can we get McDonalds after?
Dente: IS THAT THE PLACE WITH THE APPLE FRIES?
Razz: Absolutely not.
Carl: Why not?!
Razz: I’m still mad at you.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I’m not a steed. You can try to tame Lord Hater when we get back.
Tart: .... FINE.
Carl: .... but we've been good since then!
Razz: You have been neutral. Not good and not bad.
Carl: .... does neutral mean we get... Dairy Queen?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Neutral means Subway.
Carl: EWWWW! They sell the sandwiches with the veggies and no toys!
Razz: You two can either split a healthy, leafy sub or wait until we get home.
Carl: ...... why do you gotta ruin all the fun?
Razz: Oh I’m sorry, I’m not the one who decided to disobey their Uncle and scare several months off his life by going to an unknown dimension!
Carl: ..... you’ve brought that up already....
Razz: And I will bring it up to your parents if you continue!

***
Bookwyrm
Carl: .... can I get bacon on mine?
Razz: If you are behaving during the shopping.
Carl: ...... Slim, can I get a cookie there?
Slim: .... bro? .... please can we have cookies?
Razz: *Not amused.*

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Sorry Carl. No cookies.
Ranger: Uhhhh... what’s a cookie exactly?
Drawl: Don’t tell me you’ve never seen a cookie before.
Ranger: ..... I haven’t seen one before. I’ve just heard the word said every so often....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: We will get one for the bitties and you may have one IF. I. DECIDE. TO. ALLOW. IT. I can't say anything about Slim’s money.
Slim: ..... I could buy a cookie.
Kara: ...fooooor all of us?

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: For me of course. I’m a big boy with big needs. I need all of that cookie. Plus, if I share, it might make Razz mad.
Razz: Oh, would you look at that! We are finally at the craft store, and it’s right across from a hardware and toy store. We can get all of our shopping done here.

***
Bookwyrm
Carl: Please get us a cookie Papyrus? Please? Pleeeeease?
Kara: Please? Please?
Dente: ... um.... please?
Floof: ....... zzzzzzzzz.....?

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Sorry kiddos, but I fear my bro’s wrath more then I care for puppy dog pouts.
Razz: As he should! Now everyone file out and don’t stray from me! Hopefully we won’t have any run-ins with “colorful” humans today.

***
Bookwyrm
Carl: ........OMG CAN WE GET CLOTHES FROM THE TOYSTORE FOR THEM? THEY WOULD LOOK SO CUTE!
Tart: *Taps his heel.* Let’s stay on task!
Razz: You treat me like a horse again and I'll make you ride with Kara.
Slim: Let’s get the furniture and ladders. Essentials first.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Exactly! At least someone is staying on task!
Razz: So, do you need little beds? Or just bedding? You never specified there.
Drawl: We got different preferences. Some of us like miniature beds, though they are usually very uncomfortable. Tart and I have always made nest out of stuffing and fabric and slept on that. Others like sleeping next to their owners, like a cat or whatever.
Razz: Hmmmm... of course you wouldn’t give me a straight answer..... oh shit.
Kara: What?
Razz: Toy store first than craft store!
Carl: Why?!
Razz: I see a familiar wild Karen over there that I don’t wanna deal with!

***
Bookwyrm
*In the toy store, there is a decent selection of doll stuff. There's a few expensive houses, some wouldn't work as the door doesn't open, only the whole house. There is however a discount section. Some with damaged packaging or no longer stocked but need to be sold off still. Razz looks here first. To see what he could grab to alter. He sees some that won't work, too damaged or not what he wants.... then he sees.... it. A small log cabin. It has four rooms. Two on the top floor, a living room, and a side room. It is missing what looks like it could have been an outhouse from the shape of the plastic. It has a working door and only the side opens, not the house opening in half. It wouldn't be as spacious as the couch, but it would be enough as long as the bitties don't over stuff it. The ceiling might be a bit low for comfort, but the Papyrus bitties can stand in it.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh god he’s getting them a full blown dollhouse fjdnfjdldj)

Razz: Hey guys, check this out.
Drawl: Dang, that some pretty fancy digs for a bitty. *Opens the door and walks inside.* A bit dark though.
Razz: I can grab some string lights and you can hang them around the rooms. The cat can’t get to you, and you won’t be destroying my couch.
Tart: Hmmmm..... it looks like each room is about..... 10 inches by 10 inches by 8 high...... we could stick a rope ladder out this back window here to get to the first floor..... Oh, the rooms on the same floor connect.
Drawl: I like the patternin’ in this room. It’s so yellow and floral. We should put the nest in here.
Dente: This is fancy! We could have the best slumber parties!
Razz: Here Ranger, tell me if you can navigate the house. *Sets him by the house so he can check it out. Kara and Carl have gone down the isle to look at some doll vanities on clearance.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Yep, I had to. It’s small just enough room to move about and have some furniture. The Papyrus line tends to max at around 6 inches, the Sans at 4ish.)

Tart: ... I don't like these beds. I think one of the big pillows instead. Cheaper too.
Razz: That’s only big to you.

Slim: These drawers only have one working drawer.... oh the wardrobe works! That's good.

***
HomeHawk12
(With them that small that gives them plenty of room lol)

Kara: Look at these little chests I found! They look like treasure chest in different colors!
Carl: let’s get one for all of them! They could use them as little travel bags! Or maybe to keep personal belongings in?
Slim: Do you guys need a table and chairs?
Dente: Wowie! I’ve never used a little table and chair before! Usually I have to eat from a hamster bowel! What about you Ranger? Floof?

Floof: They gave me a little dining set. Didn’t use it though. I think the bratty nine year old threw a fit.
Ranger: *Still trying to get a feel of the inside of the house.* N-no..... I haven’t.
Drawl. Can we get a carpet for this? Like, that super duper plush fabric?
Razz: We can see what they have at the craft store.

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: …*Lazing on the material*.... this is really comfy.
Razz: The craft store has even softer fabric. And other patterns.
Slim: The plate ware might not be perfectly sized. Or the clothes. Maybe Muffet can help there. I need to ask her something about Monica.
Tart: ... Why would you ask this Muffet about that creature?!?

***
HomeHawk12
Carl: Dunkle Slim! Look what we found in this isle! *Drags Slim into a separate isle with a small section on foreign dolls.* Look! They look more proportional than Barbie clothing!
Slim: “Obitsu 11”..... they look like they might fit the Sanses, I’ll still need to talk to Muffet about Papyrus clothes.

Ranger: Mr. Razz.... I’m done.
Razz: Seems like something you could use? You can sleep with the other bitties and store whatever you need.
Ranger: Y-yes... I think so.
Razz: Something wrong?
Ranger: I-it’s just...... I don’t trust Tart and Drawl enough..... to sleep in the same nest as them..... *His grip gets a little tighter on Razz’s finger.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: … Do you... need a place of your own?.... I’m... going to be honest. I get nightmares at night and it might not be safe for you with me. Papyrus gets them too.
Ranger: ... um... could we try?... maybe? ....... p-please?
Razz: ... alright. You can change your mind at any time.

Slim: .... actually with how thin those Barbie dolls are.... it could work for the me types. Drawl, Ranger, and Dente....
Kara: I’ll grab a few bitties for comparison! *Rushes back to the other isle and grabs Dente and Floof, bringing them back over.*

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: T-thank you..... truly.
Razz: Remember, changing your mind is always-
????: Oh great, now they are creeping in the toy store.
Razz: Oh Jesus Christ.
Ranger: D-do you know her?
Razz: Her name is Linda. She’s from the PTA at Carl’s school..... and it looks like Helen is with her.
Helen: Oh my gosh, is that a baby skeleton? Is that your baby???
Razz: No! He is fully grown for his size, and NOT my offspring!
*Drawl and Tart hide in the dollhouse sensing trouble. Floof and Dente are in another isle.*

Slim: This jacket looks like something Ranger would like. Leather and studs are an Edge thing.
Dente: They have balloon pants! What are balloon pants?
*Floof just grabbed a few pieces of lounging clothing and is resting in Kara’s hair.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Dente nooo. That's a threat to fashion. And on a skeleton? Oof.)

Helen: ... but he's so cute and tiny? Like a baby! And then he grows up!
Linda: *Sneers*... I've.... only seen you and your brother… as skeletons..... who is the mother?
Razz: ........ you had better not be saying what I think you are saying . L I N D A.
Ranger: ....R-Razz? What's going on? We were just getting things in my size. W... what's wrong with that....?

***
HomeHawk12
Helen: Oh my gosh he talks! *Helen moves in to get a better look, Linda following after only more disgusted.*
Razz: There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, Ranger. And, Oh, maybe they just prefer keeping to themselves since it’s so easy to get crushed by human feet. You know how oblivious humans can be, right Linda?
Helen: Is..... is he a pet? Are they sold somewhere-
Razz: He is NOT A PET! He is a monster, just dwarf sized. How would you humans like that if we monsters started saying that to you’re growth stunted humans?!

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: *Sees the large shapes get closer.* R-Razz! I don't like this!
Razz: Step away from us. *Moves a hand to Ranger.* Ranger, do you want to ride on my hand?
Ranger: .... yes.
Linda: What’s wrong with him? We just wanted a closer look.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Oh I don’t know Linda, maybe it’s a little something you humans like to call personal space!
Linda: Hmph! Just like a monster to get confrontational over such a little thing.
Razz: That whole bake sale last month you kept calling a “little thing,” yet I raised twice as much money as you ever did with your coffee bars. Little things can add up to a lot.
*Linda quickly rushes closer to almost jab his sternum. Ranger just sees a big shape passing right next to his head heading right for Mr. Razz. Too close! Instincts to bite are kicking in!*

***
Bookwyrm
*Ranger snaps at Linda, barely missing, if he had just a bit better sight she could have lost a finger.*
Razz: *Whispers an apology to Ranger real fast.* HOW DARE YOU PICK ON AND HARASS A DISABLED MONSTER, LINDA. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD STOOP SO LOW YOU BITCH!
Linda: HE ALMOST RIPPED MY FINGER OFF!

Slim: *Hears the commotion*... Kara, if the police come go hide in the bathroom, we don't want them to find out you don't have papers here. You better do it, or you won't be able to visit other universes again. Carl, stay close, gather the bitties up. I'll text a cover story to the Queen. Say they were recently found in the Underground and had hidden to stay safe, they hadn't known the barrier was broken.
Kara: O-okay...

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: IF YOU HADN’T BEEN YELLING AND SCARING HIM HE WOULDN’T HAVE SNAPPED!
Linda: I NEVER TOUCHED EITHER OF YOU!
Razz: HE’S PRACTICALLY BLIND YOU IDIOTIC SKANK, AND ONLY SIX INCHES TALL! HOW WOULD YOU REACT TO SUCH A SCARY SITUATION IF YOU WERE HIS SIZE!?!?!
Helen: Linda, we should leave.
Linda: NO! THAT VERMIN NEEDS TO BE PUT DOWN!
*Ranger flinches at the words “put down,” he’s shaking a bit. Razz holds him protectively to his chest.*
Helen: He told you to stay back...
Linda: UNACCEPTABLE!!!

Slim: *Spots a manager and employee rushing towards the yelling.* And so it begins.....
Dente: W-what’s going on?
Slim: Based on the voice I am hearing, nothing good.

***
HomeHawk12
(Bestest boy needs the biggest turtleneck lmao)

***
Bookwyrm
(Omg look at him! He is so positive in the wake of what has happened to him!)

***
HomeHawk12 — 12/06/2020
(All Ruses tackle adversity/negativity with positivity until it goes away, or they pretend it did Imao)

***
Bookwyrm — 12/06/2020
(I know and they are adorably.)

Razz: Don’t worry Ranger, she's just racist. I won't let anything happen to you. *Razz is getting the same feelings he would if Puppy was threatened in the Underground.* You can trust me. *Pulls Ranger to his chest and moves to shield him.*
Linda: Helen, this is unacceptable to allow them to bite! Even children learn better!
Razz: Maybe you should stop expecting monsters to be humans? We are different. I do not think like a human. I think like a skeleton monster. What if I suddenly expected you to react like a fish monster. With gill flares and fin flicks? A monster with sharp teeth have them for a reason! They are our last defense, just like our claws! So take your racist bullshit and eat it like the rest of the shit media you consume!

***
HomeHawk12
(Go Razz! Be the good parental/brother figure Ranger never had!)

Linda: How DARE you-
Manager: Excuse me! Is everything okay here? *Breaks up the conversation before anyone gets mauled.*
Razz: She-
Linda: That little skeleton thing nearly bit my finger off! They need to be banned!
Razz: She was threatening my little friend and I. He’s tiny and nearly blind, and this woman had the audacity to threaten and mock him! I told her to step back, but apparently right on top of me was the best place to get her point across!
Linda: THAT PET OF YOURS NEEDS TO BE PUT DOWN!
Razz: He is not a pet! He is a MONSTER!!!
Manager: Both of you be quiet or you are both getting banned! *The two stop yelling. Now what is the lady talking about?*
Razz: *Slowly pulling his one hand down so the man can see the tiny, six inch tall skeleton gripping his shirt for dear life.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Ranger has little specks of tears in his sockets.*
Razz: .... Ranger, can I wipe off your face?
Ranger: *Shaky breath and a tremble to his voice.* Y-yes..... is it… safer now? *His claws are tangled in Razz’s shirt.*
Manager: ... oh goodness he's small.
Razz: And you can see why I would be protective over him.

Slim: .... Why is it always racists?
Carl: ..........
Kara: Dente, you have to be in the bag, it might not be safe.

*Tart is ........ well he can see how protective Razz has gotten.*
Drawl: ....*Whispers* .... Tart...... that looks... maybe this home we can stay. Not just for a few weeks either..... for a… a long time.
Tart: … I… want to make sure this is a good place, ok? We haven't had the best luck..... if that human does much more, I think we will have to interfere. Ranger isn't exactly..... a usual Boss.

***
HomeHawk12
Linda: It nearly bit my finger off!
Helen: .... he did tell you to step back.....
Linda: Who’s side are you on?!
Helen: He’s so cute and helpless I can’t Linda!
Linda: A “defenseless” little thing that nearly left me an amputee! The police need to be called! It’s feral!
Manager: This is a monster? *Steps closer to Razz to get a better look.* And you say he is blind?
Razz: Yes and yes. Monsters come in many sizes, as little as him or as big as a Knight Night. My little friend has severe visual impairment, I’m not sure how much he can actually see.
Ranger: I-I’m sorry.... did I do something wrong? *See’s the shape of the human leaning in closer, flinching.* W-w-who’s there? Is it the yelling one?
Linda: It’s obviously faking! Don’t fall for it! That’s how it lures you in!!!
Drawl: *Pokes his head out of one of the dollhouse windows.* I-is the scary lady g-gone? *Sockets double in size being extra adorable.* W-we heard yellin’ and got so scared.....
Helen: There are more of them?!
*Tart opens the front door, knife off his back and showing off how much shorter he is, sockets naturally massive and eyelights tripling in size.* M-mister Manager, was it? W-we were just here hoping to get things in our tiny size..... we didn’t mean to cause any trouble. We’re really sorry. *Proceeds to pout adorably.*

Slim: *Looking into the isle, Carl, recording the whole incident on their phone.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Damn those two cowboys know how to manipulate humans.)

*The manager melts. To him it’s a protective skeleton with three tiny charges. That may or may not be children. that is still on the table. Because that is very cute. OMG look at his eyes!!!*

(Orchid is going to squeal over this video.)

***
HomeHawk12
(They been living on the streets for a while, mainly under people’s couches. They have their secrets fjfngjfk)

Linda: Excuse me! Are you going to do something about them or not?!
Manager: W-well, as far as I can see, Ma’am, you have not been physically harmed, and these monsters are clearly here to shop and nothing more. I think it would be best for both parties if you two parted ways and continued with your business.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: *Large stars in his sockets, he learned to do them on command.* Razz? Does this mean we can get the cabin house? I've never had a house for just me and my brothers!
Drawl: It’s the perfect house! *Hugs the damaged packaging, peeking up to assess how well it's working.*

*Helen is sold.*
Helen: ... could I get them something?

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: *Hands together like Tiny Tim praying.* Y-you would help us? Really?
Helen: *Like a hypnotized victim to their adorable nature, pulls out eighty dollars from her purse and hands the big wad to Tart.* Take it little guy, to help pay for the house.
Tart*: Wowie! Thank you so much nice lady! Look brother! We can get our own house and not have to climb rope everywhere! It’s our size!
Drawl: This is mighty kind of ya.... I apologize, but I’m afraid I missed your name.
Helen: I’m Helen, and you are very welcome. Sorry for causing all this trouble.
*Linda is standing their slack jawed like a carp.*
Helen: Come on, let’s leave them to shopping. See you at the next PTA meeting! Bring your new friends along!
Razz: ... I’ll think about it.
Manager: Glad everything is settled. Let me know if you need assistance with anything else.
Razz: Uhhhh.... sure thing.
*Manager and the ladies leave the isle, Drawl porting over to Razz’s hand to see how Ranger is doing.*
Drawl: Hey, that was a great play there, acting like you’re blind. Ya even had me fooled.
Ranger: ......

(I know I wrote Razz with a little backpack, but now all I can think of is Razz with a fanny pack strapped across his chest with all the dad necessities hooked onto it like a soldier in a military operation, the bitties poking their heads out to get his attention.)

***
Bookwyrm
(I think you put Razz instead of Tart in a few places)

Ranger: .... um............. I’m not..... acting...... one socket doesn't work and the other barely at all...... I..... can see shapes. And some brighter colors... easier....
Drawl: ..... oh.
*Tart is smugly counting his prize.*
Tart: We can get the house and that fluffy pillow!

(Dad Razz is great. Omg.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Your right lol, I’ll fix that real quick)

***
Bookwyrm
(Riding in style.)

***
HomeHawk12
(I just reread that thing I wrote with Razz doing the adorable act instead of Tart, and I just died a little inside lmao)

Drawl: Did something happen?
Ranger: They never worked right.... but I lost sight in the one.... a-after.... *Goes quiet, he doesn’t want to talk about it anymore.*
Drawl: Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up anything bad.
Ranger: ...... *Still trembling, coming down from his panic. He’s not in that house anymore, with that horrible teenager. He’s with nice monsters, not sadistic humans.*
Razz: *Now wracking his brain if there is anything he can get Ranger specifically to help him feel better about the whole thing. Maybe a super plush, squishy stuffed animal? Baby blanket? Luxury pet bed so he’s safer on the bed with Razz?*
Carl: Are you guys okay???
Tart: Doing much better! Now help me load this house into the cart with those little chest and wardrobes you grabbed. And don’t forget the tiny hangers!
Carl: O-okay!
Slim: ..... remind me to bring these little guys next time I make a run to any store ever. I’ve never seen a human fold so quickly, much less an aggressor.
Floof: *Floats over to Razz’s hand seeing how Ranger is holding up.*
Razz: ... you guys stay here. I’m going to take a little walk with Ranger.

***
Bookwyrm
(Now I just imagined Orchid and the Toriels storming the new verse and making off with the whole store of bitties.)

(And man, let me tell you those giant pet beds for big dogs? Work even better for pillow forts)

*Floof grabs a hold of Razz to be pulled along. Outer Bitties are known for their calming abilities.*
Razz: ... did you get injured, Ranger?
Ranger: ... no, I just.... couldn't tell what was going on. At all.
Razz: .... would getting a pillow or a fluffy bed to put on mine help? You said bright colors help? Maybe we can get some bright dot stickers to put on edges.
Ranger: … that… sounds good… sorry for trying to bite.
Razz: You were defending yourself. Don't worry.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: *Takes them to the baby section, careful not to tell Ranger of course. They get to a row of extremely plush stuffed animals, with arms and legs made to support infant humans.*
Razz: let’s see, we have plenty of bright colored ones to choose from. Anything peak your interest? He takes Ranger around to test out each one, letting him feel and climb on them to try out how they would work for sleeping. He finds an oddly shaped bright yellow bear with long softer arms that are sewn together at the hands creating a little cradle he could ball up in.
Ranger: I-I like this one, is this one okay?
Razz: Of course. Not a problem at all. *Floof remains quiet, happy to see Ranger doing better.*

(Bro, the Toriels would rescue all the bitties and use whatever gold they had from the Underground days to create a bitty paradise. It would be the most epic funhouse.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Maybe even do raids to rehome as many bitties as possible with the monsters in the known universes that are safe for them.)

*Razz places the bear in the cart.... Ranger decides to sit on the bear for now.*
Floof: *Whispers*... hey big guy, maybe get one of those for the kid too. In case you need to have your bitties over somewhere else.

***
HomeHawk12
(They’d also storm into the corporate office of whoever created these bitties, and force laws to prevent this horrible practice in the future.)

Razz: ..... that’s a good idea. *Grabs a similar cradling bright red fox, a light green cat and an electric blue dog. He wanted there to be lots of options.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz comes back to Tart taking command and having everyone gather what he wants. Boy gonna spend his whole 80 bucks TODAY...... and yes there is a horse figurine. It may be pastel purple but the saddle is detachable! And paint is a thing!*

***
HomeHawk12
(YESSSS! The boy will tame LH one day!)

*They head to the craft store next. Razz ripped the tag off the stuffed bear and let Ranger sit in it while they are in this store (half-expecting that Karen with the holy water to sneak in again. She was hanging around outside earlier). Slim comes across some wood dowels and tiny carving knives. Maybe if he practices a bit he can make a walking cane for Ranger? He’ll buy some and give it a try.*
Kara: Ranger! What do you think of these stickers! Can you see them? *Holds up brightly colored, reflective stickers with animal faces.*
Dented: Those are adorable!
*Tart is trying to figure out if this Boss bitty also has a personality defect on top of his vision. He was acting like a reserved Boss back at the house, but dropped it during the whole altercation. Is it a defect, or trauma?*

**
Bookwyrm
(Tart, its most likely trauma. A disability takes a lot of the fight out of you sometimes. And he can't exactly see anything to do his bossing around. He will get more comfortable once he can map out the apartment.)

Razz: .... these fairy ladders seem sturdy.... you should probably test them out. We can make ladders too, but we want the best stability for repeated use.

*Drawl is lost in the fabrics. Theres so many soft ..... zzz.....*

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart just needs to know everything. He doesn’t like being left in the dark, then he can be the smartest one in the room dhdhghfje)

Tart: These ladders will work well for our needs. And they have hooks to make the ladders longer!
Dente: These fairy things are so much fun! They are made using more standard colors then the toy ones!
Floor: Hey Drawl, let me get in on the...... zzzzzz..... *Succumbs to the soft standing no chance.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Slim watches in envy. Those two are so lucky.*
Carl: here's some lawn chair figures. The armchair is just hard plastic.
Kara: Look there's little flamingos!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Focus humans, we have money for the essentials only. Helen, surprisingly, helped a lot, but I am not a bank.
Carl: Awwww......
Slim: Don’t you guys do lemonade stands or something for money? Maybe it was hotdog stands? Car stands?
Kara: We could earn money for more furniture!

***
Bookwyrm
Kara: Dente, do you want to help make lemonade with me later? We can get dad to help with a stand!
Dente: That sounds fun! What’s lemonade?
(Swapgore still doesn't know of his newest addition.)
Razz: we can come back later for decorations once we get essentials. Now for fabric....................*Sees the two cuddled bitties asleep in the shelves of fabric.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Swapgore will melt. Oh god, as soon as he and Toriel learn of the abuse they will probably wanna double team storming the Bitty shop, one doing the rescue while the other lights everything on fire.)

(Okay I started looking up tiny things and bro, functional instruments have gotten small. Look at this thing! It’s so tiny!)

Razz: ...... *Decides to get a quarter yard of whatever the lazies are sleeping on. He also let the non-lazies pick one each, and throws some stuffing on top. They were passing a toy isle when Tart notices.*
Tart: HALT! Go down that isle!
Razz: Why?
Tart: JUST DO IT!!! *They turn down the isle, Tart having spotted small packs of Lego kits.*
Tart: I’M GOING TO NEED THIS, RUBBER BANDS, SCREWS, NAILS, AND STUCKY TACK!

***
Bookwyrm
(I just imagined Tart and Dente working together to play the mini piano. Omg)

Razz: ... you mean sticky tack?
Tart: NO IT IS STUCKY TACK! I neeeeeeed it.
Razz: .... I think I have a few nails and screws at home. And we can get a small kit. Maybe one of those booster sets that don't have a instruction with it, just additional pieces. Like the regular bricks.
Tart: I NEED IT.

***
HomeHawk12
(STUCKY tack XD when autocorrect doesn’t kick in and I just click a wrong button but it turns out adorable)

(Dente and Tart would start trying to build a mechanism that relates to the piano as a trap thing, Drawl and Floof take naps on it while Ranger will click a note every so often and smile.)

Razz: .... *Surprised to see Tart so dead set on this.* Alright alright, but this is the last purchase for today. We are already over my budget.
Slim: I can pitch in some bro. Don’t worry about the Lego stuff.
Kara: Me too!
Razz: ... your contributions are appreciated.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: I want that one!
*The set has cyan, lime green, and a purple. The package says.... Mermaid?*
Drawl: .... those are neat... maybe when we get more cash we can get the dragon set.
Razz: ... are you sure you want this one? You can't bring it back later.
Tart: YEEEEEEEEES!

***
HomeHawk12
(Something tells me either Tart likes the colors, or he thinks mermaids are super cool fjdncfj)

Tart: *Literally vibrating with excitement while they check out, and wants to sit in the bag with his Legos on the way back.*
Slim: Come on pal, it’s not safe to be in the bag while we’re driving.
Tart: THEN HOLD MY LEGOS!
Slim: We’re still stopping for food at Subway. you’ll need to come inside so you can pick what you want.
Tart: NO!
Slim: I’m not leaving you in a hot car the whole time.
Tart: LEAVE ME!
Slim: ...... If I hold your Legos on the way back where you can see them, will you sit with the other bitties and come inside? We can get it to-go so you won’t be apart from it long.
Tart: ...... FINE! BUT JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE BEING ANNOYING ABOUT IT!

***
Bookwyrm
(He likes the purple, looks like him.)

*Drawl is now excited for the cookies. The Bitties agree to share a six inch ham and cheese between them, as none of them have really tried all the kinds of sandwiches. Tart is very very impatient.*
Tart: Are we done yet? My Legos might be gone! Or melted!

***
HomeHawk12
(XD Did he get the Ariel set? I’m just asking the real questions here hvjnn)

*Razz and Slim are splitting a foot long sub with all the fixings, while the kids are getting theirs with bacon.*
Razz: Be patient. Your Legos aren’t going anywhere.
Cashier: And here’s your cookie. Will that be all for today?
Carl: Wait! *Holds up there leftover dollar.* Chocolate chip please!
Razz: I will allow it only because it’s with your own money.
Tart: COME OOOOOOONNNNN!!!!
Razz: I said calm down or we will slowly eat here instead of the apartment!
Tart: *Whimpers. His Lego’s need him noooooo.*

***
Bookwyrm
(It’s a pack of Mermaid colors. The Ariel was Duplo and not really.... Bitty size friendly.)

*Tart is laying face down in protest. His Legos.....the poor Legos....*
Razz: .... look, it won't be much longer.
Drawl: .... I like the cookie.
Dente: It was amazing!
Ranger: .....*munching on some cheese.*
Tart: Uuuuuuuuuuugh.

***
HomeHawk12
(Got it. That does make more sense for his protective fort wall expansion to the house lol)

Ranger: This is pretty good. What type of cookie was this called again.
Floof: Chocolate chip. Some good stuff right there.
Razz: Okay everyone, now we are ready-
Tart: LETS GOOOOOOO!!!!! *Climbs onto Razz’s shoulder and points forward.* NO TIME FOR FOOD ONLY TIME FOR GETTING HOME!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Tart, we need to clean up.
Tart: LEGOS..... PLEASE.
Slim: It won't take long.
Drawl: We have to get the house and ladders before the legos.
Tart: BUT I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO HAVE LEGOS! PLEEEEEEEASE!

***
HomeHawk12
*Big skeletons and children are going back and forth between the car and apartment taking in shopping bags, Tart once again laying face first on the carpet in protest.*
Drawl: Cheer up bro. We’re gonna get to live in something that isn’t a ratty old sofa. I, for one, am glad we don’t need ta fight mice for land this time.
Tart: uuuuuUUUURRRRRRGGgggggg...
Ranger: .... If it helps you feel better, you can play with my soft thing.... it’s very cuddly and a pretty yellow color.
Drawl: The bear?
Ranger: Ummmmm.... yes?
Tart: NOOOOO!!!!
Ranger: .... sorry I offered.....
Drawl: Seriously bro, stop being a brat.
LH: Meow!
Drawl: Look! Even the cat- OH SHIT DUCK!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
(Got a Slim Drawl mix up.... and Razz is a Disney princess. TALKING CAT.)

Razz: ..... okay, that is kinda funny and cute. *Carries the last bag in, containing the blessed Legos.*
*Slim holds the door open and hears Bitty screeches. And cat screeches.*
*Lord Hater is bucking and rolling with Tart on the back of the cat like a rodeo bull.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Pffft. All hail princess Razz. What did he see that was so cute?)

Drawl:* Grabbed Floof and Ranger, ducking for cover behind the bear leg.*
Dente: GO TART GO!!!!
LH: mmmRRRRROOOOOW!
Tart: YIELD FOWL BEAST-MPPHH!
LH flips over on her back pinning Tart under her.

***
HomeHawk12
(Wow, It took a moment for me to realise what you meant by talking cat and Slim/Drawl mix up XD that should read better now lmao)

***
Bookwyrm
(It was funny tho)
*Razz watches as Tart pulls out a length of yarn from his pocket. Unravels it. Then proceeds to climb. And try to muzzle/rein lord hater. Tart gets thrown. And lord hater runs off to sulk the indignities.*
Tart: I WILL RIDE YOU ONE DAY CAT!
Razz: .......... *doesn't know what he just watched

***
HomeHawk12
(Maybe I shouldn’t have ruined the fun then..... STUCKY tack can stay though (autocorrect automatically made it upper case djfnfk))

Razz: *Decides as long as Lord Hater isn’t actively hunting the Bitties or bleeding, then he’s fine with whatever.*
Slim: Got the dollhouse. And you got the Christmas lights and everything?
Drawl: Right here. We are ready to decorate. Right bro?
Tart: I still want my Legos first.....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: You can do that once the house is set up. Unless Drawl can do it how he wants. And please keep a space for Ranger just in case. Here's your sticky tack.
Tart: STUCKY TACK.
Razz: Sure sure. Here's you nest material.
Tart: Drawl! The faster we do this the faster I get my Legos!
Ranger: ......can... may I do my bed, too?
Slim: Don’t forget to leave Floof and Dente's fabric out.

***
HomeHawk
Razz: Sure thing. *Picks up Ranger, some stuffing and his chosen fabric, carrying him to his bedroom. He makes sure his bed is as far against the wall as it can get.* This is the edge of the bed, I think it’s safer for your nest to be closer to the wall so I don’t knock it down in my sleep.
Ranger: .... okay, I can do that.
Razz: *Sets the bear between his pillow and wall, placing the material close and letting Ranger get a feel for the bed and it’s drop offs.*
Kara: How do you guys make nest anyway?
Razz: When did you get here?
Kara: I was right behind you.
Razz: .... whatever. Ranger, will you be okay if I step out for a few minutes? I need to notify Queen Toriel and Asgore of this.... recent development.

***
Bookwyrm
Bedroom:
Kara: Do Fell monsters make nests?
Razz: Kara no. That’s just.... small monsters like it more, okay?
Kara: So you like it?
Razz: .... *Flat look.*

Living Room:
*Noises from the cabin.^
Slim: You guys doing alright?
*Noise continues.*
Floof: Eh. They are probably fine.

***
HomeHawk12
(Daaaaammn..... Either Carl is rubbing off on Kara, or they’ve been secretly hiding shade this whole time)

Bedroom:
Razz: ...... just make sure the little bugger doesn’t fall off the bed.
Kara: Okay.
Razz: *Steps out, retrieving his cell from his pocket, also hearing concerning noises from the cabin.*
Razz: What the heck are you doing in there?
Slim: I don’t know, I’ve been asking, but no one has answered.
Razz: Mind checking into it Floof?
Floof: Awwwww, but the cabin is way over there....

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz picks up the fluffball and sits him by the door.*
Razz: There! Go on! Slim? I need to notify her Majesty of the new monsters. I ..... really hope we don't have to register them as a type of baby bones.

***
HomeHawk12
(Go Floof! Be free to the wild!)

Slim: .... yeah, let’s hope not too. Hey, Whimsuns are considered normal monsters, yeah? There’re pretty small.
Razz: Let’s hope they get a similar classification. *Steps into the kitchen, checking the time. 7:30pm. The Queen should be done with her all day dinner date pretty soon.*
Razz: ...... oh god..... do I gotta tell her about how I lost Chara??? I can’t lie to her Majesty..... but I did get the kid back in the end.... but I lost them in the first place!

Living Room:
Slim: *Watches expectantly as Floof enters the front door.*
Floof: Woah.... okay, wow.
Slim: Wow what?

***
Bookwyrm
Floof : Uh- *Gets pulled in the cabin, door slams.*
Slim: ... see that doesn't reassure me. Sans? .... *Enter the kitchen.*
*Razz is having an anxiety attack. His hands tremble with his phone.*

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Woah, take it easy bro, what happened?
Razz: I-I can’t do it Puppy....
Slim: Can’t do what?
Razz: *Slides against the fridge so he is sitting on the floor, without even realising.* If I tell the Queen I lost the kids, she’s gonna kill me or beat me or give me that really disappointed look that makes me wanna jump from a roof and die..... but I can’t lie to her either! What am I supposed to do?!

Bedroom:
Carl: What are you doing in Grunkle Razz’s room?
Kara: Keeping an eye on Ranger.
Carl: Whatcha doing Ranger?
*Bitty stops what he’s doing quickly turning to face the sound, crouched defensively.*
Ranger: ... m-making my nest....
Kara: Apparently it’s only a small monster thing.
Carl: But Grunkle Razz doesn’t use a nest?

***
Bookwyrm

Bedroom:
Kara: That’s what I said, but he got annoyed! And that’s really cute Ranger. It looks cozy.
Ranger: It’s not cute! It’s practical! They don't make good big person like beds my size!

Kitchen:
Slim: She is going to understand that you did all you could. And no one can control the human, Sans. It's .... they are very stubborn.
Razz: Puppy, how I am not going to screw up with these monsters? They need me and I don't want to fail them either!
.......*there's tiny foot steps nearby in the kitchen. Dente is listening.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
Kara: But you built it cradled in the bears arms.... how can I not say it’s cute?
Ranger: Grrrrr! S-stop making fun of me!

Slim: Technically, I think Tart and Drawl could take care of themselves if they really wanted to. Dente and Floof are questionable, and I’d be worried to leave Ranger alone for too long.
Razz: Not. Helping.

Slim: L-look, I’m just trying to say that, you were completely unprepared to be a parent to me, and I turned out fine. Now your older, wiser and have a better idea about child care, and these little guys are mentally adults.
Razz: I agreed to babysit two kids today, yet ended up with seven charges..... I wasn’t prepared for this.
*Dente is hearing the whole pep talk, debating if he should say something or not.*

*****

(Ranger has completed his soft thing nest. it is very cozy.)

Full size image here!

Chapter Text

Bookwyrm
Bedroom:
Ranger: IT IS PRACTICAL.
Carl: Yeah, but still adorable.
Ranger: *Doesn’t know he has a faint blush.* STOP!

Kitchen:
Dente: ...... UM. I THINK YOU'RE DOING GREAT! AND .... IF MY BITTY TYPE DIDN’T DO BETTER WITH ENERGETIC CHILDREN, AND THAT MORE THAN THREE BITTIES ARE HARD TO TAKE CARE OF WITH THE DIFFERENT TYPES, I WOULD WANT TO STAY WITH YOU! AND I'M GLAD THAT IT'S AN OPTION TO COME BACK! BITTIES DON'T GET A LOT OF REAL CHOICE! PLEASE DON'T WORRY MR. RAZZ SANS! I DON'T KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO MOST OF US!

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
Kara: Gasp! *Whispers.* That's the cutest thing~
Ranger: *Unfortunately hears that.* I am NOT cute, OK! T-t-take that back! *Blush intensifies, cheeks glowing lightly with red magic.*

Kitchen:
Razz: *Senses how genuine this Bitty is being. When he pictures him as a mini Blue it gets easier to understand him.* Thanks Dente. That is very..... kind of you to say.
Dente: Of course! You deserve all the praise and thanks for all the help you provided. I-I fear Ranger and I especially wouldn’t have lasted much longer in the Bitty Shop....
Razz: So.... it isn’t recommended to keep more then three?
Dente: Depending on the Bitty types, it is highly discouraged! The two of you have done a great job handling all of us so far!

***
Bookwyrm
Bedroom:
Kara: ... I’ll stop only because I think you might pass out from embarrassment.
Ranger: Just Hand Me The Other Fabric.

Kitchen:
Dente: A lot of the Edgy species of bitty do not work well with other kinds! Really only me and Floof are recommended for more than just three total! Fell bitties are usually purchased to help guard, as well as be a pet! Some of them are even trained to search places!

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
Ranger: *Manages to make his nest even more adorable by ripping squares off the fabric, stuffing longer segments into the stuffed bear’s neck ribbon as a small privacy curtain, and using the rest for both blanketing and a resting area around the bear's legs and stomach.*

Kitchen:
Razz: That is disgusting. I can’t believe..... well, that isn’t true. I know humans are capable of this sort of thing, it’s been a constant throughout history. Still, it disgusts me....
Slim: I’ve been meaning to ask, how old are you anyway? How long do you little guys tend to live?

***
Bookwyrm
Kitchen:
Dente: I don't know. It might be in those pamphlets. Bitties haven't really been around long enough to have a good amount of research on us. I don't know my lifespan.

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
Slim: Well that’s..... depressing. And a little scary. How long have you been around already?
Dente: A-almost three years, I think. I don’t exactly know when my birthday is.
Razz: Welcome to the club then. We don’t know ours either.
*More loud noises from the dollhouse cabin in the living room can be heard all the way in the kitchen.*
Razz: ..... it is probably time for me to inform her Majesty of this development. You should check on the little tykes.
Slim: Are you sure you can get through it?
Razz: Barely, but yes.

***
HomeHawk12
(Any ideas for what the Bitties are doing in the house or is that something you're leaving up to me?)

Bedroom:
Kara: So, what do you Bitties do for fun anyway?
Ranger: ..... what?
Carl: Do you guys have hobbies or anything? So far we found out Tart is really obsessed with Lego’s, and Floof loves naps and floating. Do you have anything you’ve really wanted to try? Or that you really like doing?

***
Bookwyrm
(No idea other than Floof having been integrated into the nest as material. Maybe having to open the house to rescue him.)

Ranger: I mostly was the entertainment when I had a different family. I think.... he did video games?
Carl: I got a Gameboy. Wanna try it? I got Kirby and Mario with me.

Kitchen:
*Razz calls Orchid, aka his Toriel.*
Orchid: Sans? Are you going to tell me more about the new guests?
Razz: .....Papyrus told you already?
Orchid: He let me know when there was an altercation.

***
HomeHawk12
(They open the side of the house and it looks like one of the nests from the Aliens film, Floof bound and gagged at the Center with Drawl taking a nap on him and Tart doing final adjustments. Floofs are good for calming lol.)

Bedroom:
Ranger: O-oh no! I couldn’t.... I’m not supposed to touch the console or controllers....
Kara: Well you can here.
Ranger: .... but I..... I can’t even see the screen hardly.... you can play and I’ll listen.....

Kitchen:
Razz: ..... What exactly did he tell you?
Orchid: He said that you had come upon tiny skeleton monsters in the Underground while picking up the other Chara, though I am pretty sure there is more to it then that, seeing as over hundreds of years I never once encountered tiny skeleton monsters. Would you care to elaborate?

***
Bookwyrm
Kitchen:
Razz: ....*Exhale.* The two escaped me and evaded until getting to the machine and decided to press random numbers in and hop into the portal. Slim and I had to wait and go in after them. We went to a universe where all monsters appear to have dusted in the Underground and the humans found it. Then used the dust to make various artificial monsters. And sold them as pets. Slim and I found the children looking around in one of those stores, they stole some of the monsters, hiding them in their bags, with some of the monsters stealing items too. The machine in the empty Underground was almost completely finished and we left. I am sorry my Queen. I let them be in danger. I failed to keep them safe.
Orchid: ...........

Bedroom:
Ranger: ...... so this Mario is a plumber? And fights walking mushrooms and turtles?

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
Kara: Yep! He is Italian!
Carl: No, Mario is Italian American, from New York.
Ranger: ...I-I’m sorry, but what is a mushroom? ..... and a turtle?
Kara: You’ve never heard of those before?
Ranger: *Blushing, head bowed to the sheets.* N-no..... my first family didn’t like it when I asked questions....
Carl: Hmmmmmm..... just a second. *Stands up and rushes through the hallway, past Slim and Dente while they examine the cabin, and Razz nervously on the phone sweating bullets in the kitchen.*
Razz: Y-you’re Majesty? ...... are you still there? .... I will off myself if that will quell your rage. Please just give me a command!
Carl: MOM PLEASE DON’T DO THAT! *Shouts, then opens the fridge, grabbing a slice of mushroom from a leftover Subway sandwich.* IT’S NOT HIS FAULT IT’S MINE!
Razz: CHARA GET BACK HERE! YOUR MOTHER-
Carl: WILL HAVE TO WAIT! *Skids back into the bedroom presenting their find to Ranger.*
Carl: This is a mushroom.

***
Bookwyrm
Bedroom:
Ranger: .... it's squishy and slimy.
Carl: Yeah I know-
Razz: *From the kitchen.* CHARA GET OVER HERE. THE QUEEN WISHES TO SPEAK WITH YOU.

Living Room:
Slim: .... guys, Floof said he wanted to go with Kara. Not stay here.
Tart: Well the house is done anyway. And he can stay until Drawl wakes up. Can. I. Have. The. Legos. And. Stucky. TACK.
Slim: I don't see why not.
Tart: *Starry sockets.* FUCKING YES!

***
HomeHawk12
(Orchid stopping by the apartment to speak to Razz in person, only to meet an almost four Inch version or her former Guard Captain cursing her out for daring to look at his Lego’s.)

Living Room:
*Floof eventually shrugs when he finally gets a time limit on how long he’d be stuck there, nestling into his stuffing prison with Drawl flopped overtop of him.*
Slim: Here ya go you little weirdo.
Tart: *Eyelight are now massive stars.* YESSSSSSSSS~ 700 pieces of amazing here I come!

Kitchen:
*Carl rushes back to Razz taking his phone.*
Carl: Hey Mom..... already? But we were fine..... no, he found us within an hour..... awwww, but we were having fun..... okay, see you soon. *Hangs up and hands the phone back to Razz.* She said she’d be coming out soon to pick me up.
Razz: *Internal screaming. Orchid never gave him a command, or said anything after the explanation except to put Carl on the phone.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Tart is so damn cute holy heck) (He has been waiting for this!)

(The Queen vs Bitties:
*Tart spots Orchid in the doorway.*
Tart: KEEP WALKING. THIS IS MINE. DONT YOU EVEN DARE THINK OF TAKING A SINGLE BRICK! BACK IT UP. WALK AROUND MY LEGOS. KEEP FUCKING WALKING.
Orchid: .... oh. Well. Then.)

Kitchen:
Razz: .... well, I can only hope she kills me swiftly.
Carl: Mom doesn't do that anymore.
Razz: I wouldn't count on that.

Living Room:
Tart: Giant SlimJim! Hand me a 2 by 8! Purple! ..... I can't decide if I want to do zig zag stripes vertically or horizontally....

***
HomeHawk12
(XDDD I can't, it's too good! I can’t wait for her to pick Carl up dggdfhuubd)

Kitchen:
*Kara comes out with Ranger right as the phone call ends.*
Ranger: .... p-please don’t die Mr. Razz.
Razz: Pretty sure I don’t have a choice in the matter.
Ranger: I-I can bite her hand if she tries anything. I’ll distract her and you can-
Razz: I appreciate the sentiment, but please don’t attack Her Majesty.
Ranger: ....... *Reaches up with his hand a bit. He wants to save his new owner from this horrible “Majesty” person.... he just can’t see her and it scares him.*
Razz: *Picks Ranger up.* Let's see what the others are up to for now. Maybe you can participate, Ranger.
Ranger: In all the mad cackling from the other room?
Razz: Yep, that’s what I mean.

***
Bookwyrm
Living Room:
*Slim is watching the Lego obsessed Bitty use a scrap of paper and pencil lead from his stash to mark out plans.*
Tart: ... I think I'm going to go with a single small horizontal stripe. That spans 5 bricks total. With my walls being 15 bricks tall.
*Razz and Ranger enter to see Tort scolding Slim for the wrong brick.*

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: NO NO NO! I said a 2 by 4 brick! This is 2 by 2!!!!!
Drawl: You just need to add two separate 2 by 2 bricks, and it works the same.
Tart: YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT CONSTRUCTION!!!
Razz: Hey Ranger, you should ask if you can help.
Ranger: M-me? What can I do though? I can’t see what I’m doing....
Razz: Not everything requires sight, now go participate. *Sets him on the carpet close to where Tart is manically planning.*
Ranger: ....Is .... c-can.... I mean, could I assist you with anything?
Tart: *Gives him a suspicious look.* Hmmmmm, I need the Lego bricks separated by size, if you can manage.
Ranger: S-size?
Drawl: It’s easy, I’ll show ya how to tell the difference.

***
Bookwyrm
Living Room:
Drawl: See. Just put similar things together. You can do that by touch. Just feel the top pegs.
Tart: YOU CAN'T JUST SUBSTITUTE TO 2X2 FOR A 2X4! THERE WILL BE A CLEAR BREAK IN THE PATTERN! MY FORTRESS NEEDS TO BE PERFECT TO NOT ONLY REPEL THE BEAST BUT EVENTUALLY HOLD IT CAPTIVE! AND RESIST THE 8 LEGGED TERROR! IF IT EVER ESCAPES ITS PRISON!
Slim: .... um. Monica probably won't get out and make it this far.
Tart: BUT IT MIGHT.

*Razz waits by the door and the Charas pick up their toys, both of them had to.... if they wanted to play with the Bitties.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh god it’s a Lord Hater’s prison XD How could I be so blind?!)

Ranger: T-this isn’t so hard.
Drawl: See? Nothing to-I mean, ummm-
Ranger: It’s okay. I am used to hearing that sort of thing.

*The Charas finish cleaning up and rush over to help.*
Kara: You wanna contain the cat?
Tart: Yes! It won’t have any means of escaping!
Carl: Can’t it just jump out?
Drawl: we can build a segmented cage roof for that?
Tart: That will ruin the aesthetic!

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: ..... ok. Can you tell these colors apart alright?
Ranger: Yes. They are bright enough.
Drawl: That’s good. Tart was worried these colors weren't good enough.
Ranger: ...oh. Um....

Kara: You could make a vaulted ceiling!
Tart: ..... the material isn't strong enough for that.
Carl: What about ......... a grid?
Tart: DAMMIT I DIDN'T PLAN FOR THIS SHIT! Drawl! WHERE'S MY PAPER AND LEAD?

***
HomeHawk12
(OMG Tart is being too adorably considerate I can’t fjfjd)

*As the planning continues, Razz gets a text that Orchid is here. His soul sinks to the ground.*

Razz: ..... *Decides to sneak out so the others won’t have to worry while he’s gone, in case he gets killed by the Queen. She is at the front door when he gets down there.*

***
Bookwyrm
Hallway:
Razz: Greetings, my Queen. *Stands at attention, ready to take any blow she deems fit.*
Orchid: Chara is inside, correct?
Razz: Yes, my Queen.
Orchid: *Walks past Razz to the proper apartment door.* The small ones are there too?

***
HomeHawk12
Hallway:
Razz: Y-yes Ma’am.
Orchid: Good. Let me see them at once.
Razz: *Trailing behind her very confused by the lack of physical or verbal punishment.* Ummm.... You’re Majesty?
Orchid: Yes Sans?
Razz: Are you.... forgetting to do anything?
Orchid: No, I don’t believe so. Why?
Razz: I just figure you would be.... angry? Furious? Disappointed?

***
Bookwyrm
Hallway:
Orchid: Oh, I am. Chara is in big trouble. They know better than to run off purposefully like that. Both Charas. Regalia and Swapgore had better give them a proper scolding.
Razz: ??? .... your Majesty. I failed to keep Chara safe. That in itself is worthy of a reprimand.

Living Room:
Tart: Ranger! Is this a good contrast? The lime green and vibrant purple almost looks too much like grapes.
Ranger: I don't think I know what a grape is.
Tart: I think it's a kind of alcohol. I saw it on the labels and it said grape.
Kara: Grapes are fruit.
Tart: ..... I think you're messing with me.

***
HomeHawk12
Hallway:
Orchid: Sans, I have no reason to be angry with you. You chased after the children, and followed after and tracked them down as soon as you could.
Razz: But they-
Orchid: You did everything I could have asked of you as their babysitter. I am just ashamed that the Charas would cause you so much unneeded stress. How are you feeling?
Razz: Uhhhh.... fine?
Orchid: Really?
Razz: Well, I’m tired, but it’s nothing outside of my normal levels of tiredness.

Living Room:
Tart: Perhaps I should add the cyan in between as a sort of break..... *Front door opens, everyone looks to see Orchid and Razz entering.*

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: *Startled.* DRAWL GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE! Ranger in the house now! ITS FUCKING HUGE.
Razz: Tart! No! This is the QUEEN PLEASE BEHAVE.
Carl: Mom!

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: ‘Mom’..... *Flashbacks to a previous human he lived with known as “mom”.....* You’ve come to take away my Legos, haven’t you?! WELL YOU CAN'T HAVE THEM! MR. RAZZ BOUGHT THEM FOR ME!!!
Ranger: W-wait? The Queen?! Where is she? I need to talk to her!
Drawl: I don’t know if you want that. Seriously, it’s the biggest living thing I’ve ever seen!!!
Orchid: Chara. *Gives them the disappointed look making them shrink back.* We will discuss your misbehavior later. Right now I’m here to meet our guest.
Dente: EXCUSE ME! DOWN HERE!!!!

***
HomeHawk12
(Also Tarts initial reaction is the best XDDDD I could easily see Orchid taking his statement as a weight insult dggfss)

***
Bookwyrm
(I mean, Slim is the tallest monster they have seen and is a skeleton, Toriel is going to be big and scary. And Tart is kinda like Razz but without the intense loyalty to a queen, his breed is supposed to bond to an owner like that though.)

*Drawl is trying to get a non-complacent Ranger in the house while Tart is rushing to push all his Legos towards and in the open house. Floof is sleeping.*

*Orchid sits on the couch to better hear the loud Bitty.*
Dente: Hello, large monster! I am now known as Dente! Are you the one that may possibly kill Mr. Razz for the past events? I would like to ask that you do not! He is very nice to us! He even spent his money for our comfort! And-
Tart: *Pulls on Dente, having made his Legos defendable.* BIG MONSTER. DENTE GET IN THE HOUSE.
Dente: TART I AM SPEAKING PLEASE LET ME FINISH!

***
HomeHawk12
(And without the owner to bond with, that's left him to make up for that loss of companionship with Drawl..... and Legos. Pretty sure he’ll never abandon either of those djdnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
(Never. Raspberries bond strongly. And with a SlimJim that he is biologically made to get along with? And without an owner for a long time period? Hell no. And Legos are his love. He is totally going to build a horse stable out of them. Like a whole ranch out of Legos one day.)

***
HomeHawk12
*Ranger breaks away from Drawl, rushing towards the sound of Dente’s voice only to trip and fall on some plastic wrapping from the dollhouse box.*
Ranger: OOOF!
Drawl: What the hell is wrong with ya?! I said we gotta get to safety!
Razz: THAT’S ENOUGH! *The shout is enough to make all of them freeze.* Do I have everyone's attention? Good. This is my guest, Queen Toriel, ruler of Monster kind and... someone I am very close to. She is here to help, learn, and most of all welcome you to our world. Now could you PLEASE Calm down long enough to meet her properly?
Orchid: Perhaps it would help if they are on the counter or coffee table? I did not wish to scare them so badly.

***
Bookwyrm
(Poor Orchid doesn't want the tiny scared boys to be so scared. Drawl and Tart have been surviving on their own and know big equals dangerous.)

*Razz and Slim help the Bitties onto the coffee table.*
Tart: *Has a hand on his knife Drawl pulled out of the house for him* ......... I’ll listen. But I am not getting any closer.
Orchid:.... did the kids take you by force?
Drawl: … um… you see ma'am… uh, me and Tart… we hitched a ride to get supplies and ended up here. It's real great. Don't gotta hide here. As ownerless Bitties, it wasn't easy.
Dente: I, for one, am glad to be out of the store! You are too, right Ranger? Floof?
*Floof is sleep floating, Drawl having untangled him from the nest. He hasn't woken up yet..... he does actually need a lot of sleep.*
Ranger: Um… uh… *Deep breath.*

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: Y-you.... aren’t here to kill Mr. Razz are you? P-please don’t hurt him.
Orchid: I promise you, Razz is in no trouble whatsoever. He is safe.
*Ranger breaths a small sigh of relief. Not a big one, her voice is booming and her shape isn’t distinct enough for him to see. Just the new addition of whites and purples clouding his vision. He’s glancing all over but it’s no use.*
Dente: Does that mean you're happy here?
Ranger: M-more so than my first home, or the store.... uhhhh.....
Razz: *Whispers.* He’s almost completely blind. I don’t think he even realises where you are.... or what you are.

***
Bookwyrm
*Orchid moves as if she is talking with Doggo.*
Orchid: I'm The Queen here, and to make you legal monsters I need to know some things and see what we can do to help you.
Ranger: *Oh shit is she that giant mountain of purple????* O-o-okay. W-whatever you need. I guess.

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: … well! I am Dente! A Papy type of the Papyrus line of Bitties! Drawl and Ranger are Papyrus lines too. Drawl is a SlimJim variation and Ranger is called a Boss Bitty! Tart and Floof are of the Sans line! Tart is a Raspberry and Floof is a Outer Sans. The Outer Series is a special one! They are from a collaborative project with a space themed company! That's why he floats....... and why he is lazy! He takes after a Sansy too much!
Orchid: ....Sansy?
Razz: We grabbed some pamphlets by accident. There's a species list on one. Apparently their universe has monsters extinct and the dust used to make these lil guys. They change and tweak the process to get different results.

***
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Orchid: .... these “Raspberry Bitties” sound a lot like you Sans.
Razz: I have no idea what you are talking about.
Orchid: “Raspberry Bitties are specially made with loyalty in mind. Strong willed, devoted, dramatic, and eager to please. If you are looking for a Bitty that will never leave your side, a Raspberry may be the best fit for you. WARNING: Does not do well in households with pet spiders or other caged insects. Households no bigger than one to two inhabitants are recommended.”
Razz: .... I’m not dramatic.
Tart: FLOOF WOULD YOU WAKE UP ALREADY AND STOP SLEEPING THROUGH THE IMPORTANT MEETING!!!
Razz: .... I’m not THAT dramatic.
Orchid: *Chuckling at his denial.* Though I heavily disagree with this whole practice, I think I can see the appeal. I wouldn’t mind having a small version of my former Guard Captain around.
Razz: Why?
Orchid: You always manage to make me laugh. *Chuckling increases at his sudden purple blush.*

***
Bookwyrm
Floof: *Reluctantly wakes up, lazy grin in place.* Oh? But I have to make sure she knows my most important qualities..... sleeping and floating.
Tart: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? DENTE! ARE YOU SEEING THIS SHIT? LADY, I AM NOT UP FOR ADOPTION AND I'LL FIGHT YOU IF YOU TOUCH MY LEGOS!
Dente: Floof ... while it is good to show your qualities off, I don't think your sleep and float abilities are your best. Tart that's not nice!

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Orchid: *Still smiling from Razz’s embarrassment.* Why hello little Floof, it is nice to finally speak with you. Do you mind telling me about yourself? Perhaps a little about your history?
Floof: I’m the floating sleepy one, that’s what my description says and I don’t like ta disappoint. Got adopted to a family with two bratty kids, and they didn’t like the fact that I alway napped on the chandelier or ceiling fans. The nerve of some people.
Orchid: Oh dear. So you ended up at the shop?
Floof: Yep. First I’m napping in a corner, then next thing I know I’m pulled along for the ride. Must say, you guys are all hilarious.
Tart: HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?! YOU’RE SLEEPING ALL THE TIME!!!

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Bookwyrm
Dente: THIS IS NOT A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION! *STOMPING DRAMATICALLY.*
Drawl: .....Dente, what did ya expect there? We aren't all the sweet lines. Floof is made to be like that.
Dente: He could at least be polite.
Orchid: What is your story Tart? Drawl?

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Drawl: Ya see ma’am, I’m just a simple Bitty, born and raised under the sofa of a southern family-
Dente: What do you mean by that? Bitties can’t give birth, we’re created in test tubes!
Tart: You need to work on your lies. Seriously, they suck.

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Bookwyrm
Drawl: I got the voice fer it though. Can't argue wit that.
Tart: We! Were Bitties that happened to be in an abandoned house that the not as tall humans broke into. They seemed harmless enough, so we took the opportunity to hitch a ride once we heard they were going to explore the Bitty Store. It's the easiest way to get supplies and trade goods!
Orchid: .......... they. Did..... what now?
Razz: I didn't know about this, it must have been while the machine was cooling off.

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Kara: It is Asgore’s house in my world, and really close to the store! I thought we could ask dad for help and for him to explain the tiny slave ring! The door was unlocked.....
Drawl: It’s a place where druggies and homeless people pass through in our world. As nice as the easy soul energy was, it couldn’t last forever, and we saw our ticket out.
Orchid: *Slowly her eyes fall onto the children, the rage radiating off her in waves and her glare absolutely demonic.*
Carl: Why would you tell her that?!
Drawl: Sorry pal, Tart let the truth slip. I wasn’t gonna garner the giant’s wrath when you guys are at a better size to handle it.
Orchid: Carl.... you are grounded for six months. No TV. No video games. Homework only.
Carl: But-
Orchid: Homework. Only.

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: If it helps, there hasn't been anyone for a few days. Tart worked hard to clean up the bottles and junk they left. He used to carry a needle for a weapon before we found his blade.
Tart: This one cuts better.
Razz: I can't believe I allowed this to happen. *Face in hands.* I wouldn't blame you if you didn't let Chara back here again.
Orchid: *Looks down at Tart.* You used a what?

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*Razz is currently facing the wall in a self imposed time out.*
Drawl: It’s not like we have a way to defend ourselves. Just our teeth and claws if you’re a Fell type like us.
Tart: I am far more intimidating with a knife!
Orchid: ..... I won’t argue with that.

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Bookwyrm
Orchid: ....it's just .... quite the image of one of you stabbing or threatening a human with a dirty needle.
Tart: That’s what some humans thought too! Bitty catchers never saw it coming!
Slim: ..... *Checks phone.* Looks like Blue and Stretch are here to get Kara. I’ll bring them so we can tell them what's going on.
Kara: ...or we… could not do that?

***
HomeHawk12
(Okay we get a small peek into Razz’s living room. I should probably add a cat toy or two lol)

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Bookwyrm
(Razz would be a fan of the mice toys, to teach the cat what to bite)

(God I love these boys.)

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(Oh that’s a good point lol. At some point Lord Hater would be so confused what she’s allowed to pounce on lmao)

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Bookwyrm
(I can just see LH jumping to try and get a floating Floof. Another good reason for Floof to go to Underswap.)

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(Bro, she’d be staring so hard at the wall or ceiling for hours, not looking at nothing else like most cats, but actively waiting for Floof to float a little bit closer.)

*Blue and Stretch enter the apartment.*
Blue: Hello everyone! Stretch said we have some new monsters to- *Sees the tiny monsters on the coffee table, eyelights doubling in size and turning to stars.* OH MY GOSH THEY ARE SO CUTTTTTE!!!!!

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Bookwyrm
*Blue rushes up to the Bitties soooo excited!*
*Tart grabs Drawl and Ranger to get the hell away. Dente is more stunned and Floof is not bothered at all. Blue gets to scoop up the lazy space boy and Dente.*
Blue: OH MY GOD LOOK AT HOW CUTE YOU ARE! BROTHER LOOK! TINY RAZZ AND SLIM! AND EDGE AND RUS! BUT I DON'T RECOGNIZE THE SOFT ONE OH MY GOD HE IS SO HUGGABLE.

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Floof: That’s why my type is so popular. We’re very good for hugs.
Stretch: It even sounds like Comic. I like these guys already. *Leans down for a better look at the Fell ones, Tart holding his knife in Stretch’s face.*
Tart: STAY BACK! I’VE CUT HUMANS FOR LESSER THINGS!!!
Stretch: Sounds just like our Razzy boy too.
Blue: Where did these guys come from? I’ve never seen such tiny little monsters before!
Razz: ......
Orchid: That is one thing we need to discuss. One thing of many.
*Carl and Kara start fidgeting.*
Blue: Oh? What happened?
Slim: Well, it started shortly after we picked up The two Charas.....

***
Bookwyrm
Blue.... *is very disappointed in Kara.*
Blue: ..... Kara you know better. I thought you could handle being in other universes, but I guess I was very wrong! And breaking into a house! Not to mention what stress you two put on Razz!
Stretch: *Curious about the Legos and taps the pile spilling out of the cabin house.* What’s all-
Tart: YOU GET AWAY FROM MY LEGOS YOU OVERGROWN LIL BRO MUTANT BITCH! I WILL FUCKING CARVE YOUR RIBS INTO A CAGE FOR THE BEAST!
Drawl: Probably shouldn't mess with those.
Stretch: .....what.... did you call me???
Orchid: Tart seems to be very protective of his Legos.
Stretch: Pfffffft, Tart?!?! Holy shit that's adorable.

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Tart: SHUT UP!!!! IT’S ALL DRAWL’S FAULT! I WANTED TO REINVENT MYSELF AS THE GREAT AND POWERFUL STAB LORD, OR LAW, OR WALKER TEXAS RANGER, BUT THE IDIOT GAVE THE GAME AWAY!!!!
Drawl: Eh, I’m not denying that.
Orchid: Here is a pamphlet Blue, the things you will see are quite.... disturbing.
Stretch: Pffft! Tart and Drawl? Okay, I gotta know everyone else’s names too.

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Bookwyrm
Dente: OH! I CAN ANSWER THAT FOR YOU! I'M DENTE! THE OUTER SANSY IS FLOOF!
Floof: Sup. My personality is basically soft and floaty.
Dente: THE BOSS BITTY OVER THERE'S RANGER!
Blue: PAPY look!
Dente & Stretch: YES?/sup bro.
Blue: .... oh! That's right your species is a Papy.... no I meant my brother. But there's mini me and you! That's what a Lil Bro is! A tiny you! And a tiny me is a Baby Blue or Blueberry depending on temperament!

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Stretch: Temperament? You mean there is a Bitty version of you that isn’t super sweet or a complete goblin?
Tart: I HEARD THAT!
Blue: By the way, I like your name little Boss! It sounds very cool!
Ranger: I-it does??

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Bookwyrm
Blue: It seems like most Baby Blues are more childlike and good as child companions. Even though they are childlike they still are smart and can watch children. Or be more of a pet for people who want a sweet adoring companion. Or Blueberries for a more mature perspective, that is for more of a working Bitty version. The mini yous are marketed for a chill and punny buddy! OMG BABY BLUES ARE ONE OF THE TOP SELLERS!
Stretch: That so?
Blue: OMG LOOK AT RANGER BLUSH IT’S SO CUTE.

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(Blueberries are the working version of the Baby Blues?)

Ranger: B-blushing? What’s blushing? Is it a new Bitty?!
Drawl: You’re blushing. I guess ya can’t take a compliment.
Ranger: *Blushing harder.* I s-still don’t know what that means- AHHH! *Blue can’t help but scoop Ranger up because of the cuteness, not realizing he’s disabled.*

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Bookwyrm
(They are so we can have the Berry line name for Raspberries to be named. And so Baby Blues can be fucking adorable lil guys, but not be intentionally mentally stunted because I put my foot down on that. That’s juuuust wrong!)

Ranger: RAAAAAZZZ! WHAT!? HELP!
*Razz quickly and gently takes ranger from Blue.*
Razz: It’s okay Ranger, Blue was just excited. I have you now.

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(That’s a thing??? I know the Cherry’s are Edgy Bitties that were abused so badly they became meek and terrified of everything, which I thought was bad enough. No we aren’t doing brain damage, that's just ewwww.)

Tart: I KNEW YOU WERE OUT FOR US!!!
Blue: Huh? Wait, what just happened? Did I hurt him?! *Getting super worried.*
Razz: No, Ranger is almost entirely blind. You need to be careful since he can’t see most anything coming.
Blue: OH MY GOSH I’M SO SORRY RANGER!
Stretch: Pretty sure you crying isn’t gonna help him.
Blue: Stop it brother I feel terrible over here!!!!!

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Bookwyrm
(No no they are MADE to be baby-like. And super naive to like toddler level. I can't stand the whole "call your owner mama or daddy even if the bitty is completely mature.”)

Tart: YOU FEEL TERRIBLE?!? Imagine HOW RANGER MUST FEEL MR GIANT GRABBY HANDS! I OUGHT TO STAB YOU!
Drawl: *Looking over at Ranger*... you ok buddy?
Ranger: *Panicked breathing.*
Razz: *Rubs a thumb on Ranger’s back.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Wait, so they force them to be born mentally handicapped so that even in their adult years they are permanently at the mental age of a toddler? I mean, if one is randomly born like in people, that kind of stuff happens sometimes, but to force it is just wrong on a lot of levels.)

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Bookwyrm
(It's not framed that way but HOW ELSE ARE GENETICALLY ENGINEERED BITTIES TO BE BABY LIKE GET THAT WAY. Most Bitty stories I've seen don't have a life cycle for bitties at all. Just wake up an adult. I've stumbled on weird Bitty stories.)

(There's also like a half rabbit half Sansy one and soooooo many kinds of Bitties out there. The lamia ones are cute.)

(Bitties are very varied in how people present them in stories, and if you over analyze it gets twisted.)

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(Honestly I have a hard time finding Bitty stories that aren’t weird. I started AVA and the first chapter was good, but then you get into the weird ones.... not a fan of the rabid breeding obsessed rape Bitties. That was a disturbing one that I dropped pretty quickly.)

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Bookwyrm
(There's like a whole Tumblr on a bitty abuser. I thought at first it was a recovery story but NOPE!)

(Dude Mr. Sleeper is my favorite Bitty character ever.)

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Ranger: *Grabs Razz’s thumb for stability. Breathing starts to steady slowly.* I-I-I think *Pant.* I’m okay..... *Trying to put a brave face on but he’s not sure what a brave face looks like.*
Razz: Would your soft thing help you feel better?
Ranger: B-but I got my bed how I want it. Getting it would ruin what I did.
Razz: I grabbed a couple of them. I can get the Fox out?
Ranger: ..... yes please.
Blue: *Watery eyelights feeling the most absolute types of horrible.* I’ll go put myself in a timeout now.
Tart: THAT’S RIGHT YOU FUCKING BETTER!!!!

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Bookwyrm
(Tart dammit. You always make me smile.)

Stretch: Hey short stack, cool the comments.
Tart: I’LL FUCK YOU UP TOO!
Orchid: I think that's enough.
Tart: DRAWL! RETREAT TO THE HOUSE! GRAB FLOOF I GOT DENTE! RAZZ SANS HAS RANGER! GO! *Starts militarizing the Bitties.*
Blue: Wait-
Drawl: Tart, Razz isn't too worried-
Tart: Razz is tall enough to fight them!

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Razz: *Returns with Ranger and the plush fox only to see all the Bitties had retreated into the little house. Blue was facing the wall in the fetal position with a literal rain cloud over his head, Stretch trying to comfort him.*
Razz: ..... I think we’ve overwhelmed them enough for today......

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Bookwyrm
Orchid: .... Blue? I think they just weren't up for your excitement. It’s been a long day for them.
Slim: Ranger do you want to join them in the house or stay with Sans?
Ranger: Sans?
Slim: Sorry, he’s also called Razz.
Ranger: Razz Sans please.
*Muffled noises from the house.*
Razz: The ones that wish to go with Kara to meet Swapgore and Regalia are Dente and Floof. They were fine with you picking them up. Tart and Drawl just... lived too ferally recently, and Ranger needs you to say what you are doing. Ranger... do you think Blue could try again?

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Ranger: ...y-you’ll be right there, yes? You won’t leave?
Razz: I’ll stay right next to you. I promise. *Ranger gives a small nod, Tart and Drawl watching suspiciously from the dollhouse.*
Razz: Okay Ranger, I’m going to set you on the table, and Blue will lay his hand in front of you. Nice and slow. Right Blue?
Blue: Y-yes, of course.
Razz: *Approaches the coffee table, Blue sitting on his pelvis hoping to be less threatening.*

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Bookwyrm
Razz: Blue, they are people too. And the Fells are just like me, Papyrus, Edge and Red. Just small and vulnerable. He can't see detail very well.
Blue: I promise to be gentle!
Razz: *Hand mostly flat so he is supported.*
*Blue offers his hand to Ranger.*
*Ranger looks over to Razz before slowly getting on Blue’s hand.*

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Ranger: *Sockets widen in surprise, feeling Blue’s finger.* Y-you’re a skeleton monster too?
Blue: Yes! Stretch and I are both skeleton monsters.
Ranger: ..... i-is Ms. Queen a skeleton too?
Orchid: No dear, I am a goat monster.
Ranger: .... What's a goat?
Orchid: May I lend you my hand, and you can find out?
Ranger: .... okay.

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Bookwyrm
*Ranger is extremely small next to Orchid's hand.*
Ranger: ... are you wearing fluffy gloves?
Orchid: No. I have actual fur. 100% natural.
Ranger: ... how do you brush all that???

*Tart and Drawl are watching while keeping Dente and Floof inside. Only Dente is really trying to get back out.*
Dente: Hey! See! He was just excited! There is a reason Bitties come with recommendations! I am perfectly fine to be out there!
Tart: I can't be sure of that and we are the only Bitties here!
Drawl: Gotta stick together.

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Orchid: I have a very strict care routine to keep it all nice and silky. Horse shampoo actually does wonders for the knots. My husband helps brush out the parts I can’t reach.
Ranger: You are married? Is he a goat monster too?
Orchid: Yes, he’s a goat monster just like me.
Ranger: I-is he here right now?
Orchid: No Ranger. I’m pretty sure you’d know if he’s here. He tends to make a lot of noise when moving around.

Dente: Please let me out! She looks so soft!
Tart. SHUT UP OR I WILL TIE YOU TO THE NEST!

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Bookwyrm
Blue: I have to say you look a lot like my other Fell friend Edge! And he is one of the strongest people I know! And you look so cool!
Ranger: *Colors unknowingly.*
Blue: Wow you have a lovely shade of red.

Slim: ... you guys want to come out? *Has been sitting next to the house for a bit.*

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Dente: I want to come out please! My type requires social interactions with big creatures!
Floof: ...... eh, I’m good with whatever.
Tart: You guys really have a death wish, don’t you?

Ranger: *Steps into Orchids palm, catching the wiff of something sweet.* What is that smell? I don’t think I’ve ever smelled anything like it before.
Orchid: That would be my coconut conditioner.
Ranger: I’ve never heard of a coconut, but it smells nice.
Stretch: You haven’t heard of a lot of things little dude.

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Bookwyrm
Ranger: .... it’s not as if I can get around in a store! And there isn't exactly a school for Bitties! I just turned two after all! They only teach us more than a few basics if we are to be service bitties! And how to read!
Orchid: .... you are two years old?

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Ranger: Yes..... we usually reach adulthood by one year old, then we can be placed up for adopt..... sale. Put up for sale.
Stretch: Yeesh, that had to be tough. You didn’t get to learn anything extra for your vision issues?
Ranger: No one at the lab knew.... my former family didn’t even know, and neither did the store workers.... I-it was best to stay that way...

Slim: The Queen is giving Ranger some mighty nice pets. I might have to go over and ask for the same treatment.
Dente: She gives good boy pets?! I’m a good boy, yes?! I need good boy pats!
Tart: *Holding him back.* IT’S A LIE TO LURE YOU IN!!!!

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Bookwyrm
Tarts: THE PETS ARE A LIE!
Drawl: .... you good Floof?
Floof: Zzzzzzz… zzzzzzz…. zzzzzz….*It’s been too long since he's been asleep... and he had an eventful visit.*
Slim: Pretty sure you can tell if you like goat monsters with Toriel here. Kara has two goat monster parents.
Dente: TAAART!
Stretch: *Slinks over to sit with Slim.* Hey. What’s up with the Legos?

Orchid: .... has Sans been good to you?
Ranger: Yes! He doesn't just go by my Bitty type! No one treats Bosses soft and gentle. We are supposed to be commanding and demanding, but it’s hard when I can't see WHAT to demand. And, um, the family got me for how I looked, not how Bosses were supposed to be. Defect Bitties .... they either sell cheap or.... not.

*The Charas have been in the corner where Orchid had placed them for the important meeting.*

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Orchid: It sounds like the first family treated you poorly. Did they return you to the store?
Ranger: *Doesn’t like talking about it, but this lady feels very safe and protective. Like he can trust her.* You promise to keep it secret?
Orchid: Of course.
Ranger: .... i-it was actually the boy's aunt I think.... I wasn’t entertaining enough so the boy took something.... sharp and pointed to the inside of my socket...... he said he wanted to know if doing that would affect my vision..... he wouldn’t s-stop....*Starts subconsciously cradling his dead socket.* It went dark on that side..... a-and I don’t remember much after that..... I think the lady saw and intervened.....
Orchid: Oh you poor dear.
Blue: *Sitting silently, looking between the abused Bitty and the pamphlets, growing more and more disgusted.*

Slim: What if I give the good boy pats instead? You guys trust me, yeah?
Tart: ...... fine, but only because- Hey! *Dente brakes out of his grasp and rushes for Slim.*
Dente: I GET GOOD BOY PATS NOW, YES?????
Stretch: So the Legos?
Tart: THE LEGOS ARE MINE YOU CAN’T HAVE THEM!!!!!

*Both Charas are afraid of getting into more trouble and are trying to behave.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Slim smiles as Dente struggles into his lap. Dente looks up and his eyes beg for the pets.
Stretch is having to deal with a pissed off Tart that keeps having to smack Stretch’s hand to keep away from his legos.*
Tart: FUCK OFF YOU SMELLY TO-TALL LIL BRO!

Ranger: But I'm with Sans? Razz? .... I’m safe here! Razz Sans is really nice about helping me. He's done a lot! Even tries his best to make what I want possible!
Orchid: …*is very happy that Razz gained this monster’s trust so fast.*
Blue: ...that’s really sweet Ranger.
Ranger: I’M NOT SWEET!

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Razz: PFFFT!
Ranger: Mr. Sans? Razz? You’re still here? What’s so funny???
Razz: I told you I wasn’t leaving your side. You asked me to stay, remember?
Ranger: O-of course.
Orchid: Giving Razz the “proudest mom of the year” look, making Razz blush as bad as Ranger.

Stretch: Why can’t I touch? OW! *Tart pulls the knife out and slashes his finger.*
Drawl: Best to learn from this and get back Lil-big Bro. He’s wanted his own Lego set for the last four years since he discovered they existed. This is his life long dream come true.
Tart: AND NO BIG ASS FREAKY MUTANTS WILL TAKE THAT FROM ME!

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Bookwyrm
Stretch: Damn! That stings!
Tart: I FINALLY GOT THEM AND I WON’T LET ANYONE HAVE A SINGLE BRICK!
Slim: ... Does this feel that good? *Petting Dente.*
Dente: *Is purring so loud he is vibrating.* Around the spine? Please? More?

Razz: .... I didn't want to go back to that slave world. And they ..... most of them apparently could have ended up... in a freezer or something.

(OK so how about Drawl and Tart are 4 years old, Dente 3, Ranger 2, and Floof is just about one?)

Chapter Text

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Tart: Mr. Razz! I have been informed by human Carl that there is such a thing as miniature horses! I demand you get one this instant.
Razz: Pretty sure that’s against my apartment lease. Besides, those things shit everywhere.
Tart: I WANT TO SEE ONE!!!!
Razz: ..... I’ll figure something out.
Tart: YES! *He thinks “miniature” means small like him.*

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Bookwyrm
*After Razz figures something out.*
Tart: THE FUCKING HELL IS THAT STOMPY BEAST?
Razz: *At a petting zoo.* A miniature horse.
Tart: I AM MINIATURE. THAT THING IS NOT.

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Razz: I am sorry, would you like to meet a regular horse?
Tart: THAT was already a regular horse I don’t even- WHAT THE FUCKING BLAZES IS THAT THING!!!!!
*Razz took him to the other coral with the quarter horse in it.*
Razz: A regular sized horse.
Tart: IT’S A BEHEMOTH THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!! TAKE ME BACK TO THE OTHER TO THE OTHER!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
(Tart is so much fun he is just so spunky and opinionated.)

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(I love him so much. I’m already attached fhdndk.)

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Bookwyrm
(He is a precious lil spazz of energy and I love him to death aaaaaaaaah)

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Tart: .... I want to ride the miniature horse.
Razz: Are you sure? As you said, it is a “stompy beast.”
Tart: I came here to ride a miniature horse today and that’s what I’m gonna do!

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Bookwyrm
*The mini horse doesn't even know Tart is on it. It just searches Razz for treats.*

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Tart: *Holding onto the horse’s mane between its ears, sitting on its head.* O-okay, try making it move!
Razz: *Holds the treats in front of its snout, the horse walking for it.*

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Bookwyrm
Tart: .......holy shit. We are coming here more often Razz Sans!
*Drawl has been asleep on a sheep for quite a while now.*

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Tart: YEEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAW MOTHER FUCKERS! I AM THE KING OF HORSEBACK RIDING! FASTER MY NOBLE STEED! *Kicks it’s head with his heel like cowboys do in the movies to make it go forward. The mini horse thinks a fly has tried biting and nods its head a bit at the itch.*
Tart: AHHHHH!!!! IT’S TRYING TO BUCK ME OFFFF!!!! *Holding on for dear life.*
Drawl: *Wakes up at his brothers yelling.* Keep it up bro. *Yawn.* You’re doing great.....zzzzz....

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Bookwyrm
(Tart you are precious.)

*The horse only manages to unseat Tart. He climbs up the mane to seat back up.*
Tart: HA! YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE RID OF ME!

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Tart: BROTHER LOOK! I AM A REAL COWBOY!
Drawl: Dang bro, looking good.
Tart: Come join me and I’ll give you a ride around the arena!

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Bookwyrm
*Drawl just ports over, still laying down.*
Drawl: Yee haw.

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*After the petting zoo, Dente and Floof are visiting.*
Tart: It tried to shake me off, but I used its mane as a rope to climb back on top and force the beast into submission!
Dente: WOWIE! THAT’S INCREDIBLE!
Floof: Hehe, sounds hilarious.
Ranger: Y-you really did all of that?
Tart: OF COURSE! I AM NOW A PROFESSIONAL MINIATURE HORSE RIDER!
*Razz just watches the exchange from his spot on the sofa.... deciding not to ruin Tart’s good time, seeing as he himself was technically the one steering.*

Chapter Text

HomeHawk12
(I like that! Floof is a fresh off the line, newest bitty series that is very popular with special abilities. He’s been the least abused by the world so far.)

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Ranger: *Seeks out Orchids finger and taps it to get her attention, pointing in Razz’s direction. Orchid moves him into Razz’s view.*
Ranger: Mr. Razz? *Gestures that he wants to be held. Razz picks him up and brings him close to his chest.*

*Meanwhile, Slim has just found Dente’s sweet spot, and now his back leg is twitching like crazy.*
Floof: Mind if I get some of that too?

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Bookwyrm
Slim: Sure thing, I think Stretch could give some pets too.
*Tart is busy tormenting Stretch, who dares to look at his, just started, Lego wall.*

(Floof is baby.)
*Ranger starts up a small purr*
Ranger: ...... I’m glad you found us.

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Razz: ..... I’m glad to have you guys here. It’s still odd, but I feel.... hopeful?
Ranger: *Razz’s finger travels to Ranger’s jawline and his entire body stretches out and flops down in Razz’s palm, purring greatly increasing in volume.*
*Orchid and Blue are trying desperately to contain their laughter. They aren’t doing too well.*

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Bookwyrm
(Omg support bitties.)

*Blue has the largest stars. Orchid can barely keep her grin in check.*

Stretch: FUCK! Stop cutting me you lil heathen!
Tart: BACK AWAY FROM MY LEGOS. I FUCKING WARNED YOU.

Slim: Um.... *has his lap full of happy bitties*.... Stretch, maybe Drawl would be more ... open to interact?

***
HomeHawk12
(They are both sad damaged boys that need each other lmao.)

Ranger: *Purring and rubbing his cheek into Razz’s palm when he started scratching Ranger’s mid spinal columns.*
Blue: Wow Razz, it’s like you are a professional at comforting them!
Razz: For some odd reason..... they’re a lot like cats?

Stretch: *Turns his attention to the second floor window on the dollhouse where Drawl is hanging around.* So what do you do for fun?
Drawl: Make jokes about my particular manner of speaking and napping when my bro isn’t looking.
Stretch: ..... Do you like honey?

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: Never had it. Got a fake honey sauce packet once. It was pretty good.
Stretch: *Finally was able to eat honey again*..... wanna try it?
Tart: DON’T FALL FOR IT HE IS TRYING TO BRIBE US!

(God Ranger is cute.)
Blue: Do you think those sweet spots work on large skeletons or just bitties?

***
HomeHawk12
Stretch: It sure as hell worked on Red and Edgelord!

Razz: Wait.... what?
Stretch: What led to you and Edge’s torture session with me.
Orchid: .... I’m sorry what?

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: ..... they took advantage of the small amount of trust the Fell monsters had for them to sleep in their presence to pet some of us. Edge and Red weren't thrilled either. Tale monsters... are a lot more... touchy and feely monsters.
Orchid: ..... that's dangerous though.
Razz: Their Underground was all togetherness and smiles for the most part.

***
HomeHawk12
(I like to think Stretch is better about moderating his intake of honey now, or too much in one week just makes him feel gross.)

Slim: Did you guys try it on us too?
Stretch: Yep. Razz purrs like a little kitten and you make happy panting noises like a dog.

*Drawl runs his finger through a drop of honey from Stretch’s little container and retreats back to the house, putting that tiny bit in his mouth...... his sockets widen in amazement. He sticks his head back out eagerly.*
Drawl: What was that stuff called again?
Stretch: Honey? Want some more?
Drawl: Gimme please!
Tart: NO YOU’VE FALLEN FOR THE LIE!!!

***
HomeHawk12
(It’s getting full color and a background details fjgjhkf. Next I need to make Tart in his lego fort lol. Can’t wait to get it done)

***
Bookwyrm
(They are precious holy shit.)

*Stretch passes over a 2 oz bottle, about as much as he can handle in an outing.*
Drawl: .... you aren't getting this back.
*Floof has deep purrs.*

*Orchid has the strange urge to pet Razz.*

***
HomeHawk12
Orchid: ...... Razz, I think you have something on your face.
Razz: What? Where?
Orchid: It’s right on the side of your face. Hold on let me get that. *Takes about four gentle rubs at the side of his face, two of them hitting his sweet spot resulting in a low, adorable purring. Razz freezes on the spot.*

***
Bookwyrm
Blue: ......*Giggles because he knows what Orchid did.*
Razz: ..........
Ranger: *Purrs louder to match.*
Orchid: There, I got it..
Razz: .............

Stretch : Don’t go making a mess, Razz already torched one room.
Slim: To be fair, there was no saving your room.
Drawl: *Puts the bottle in the dollhouse living room next to a fake counter/sink.* I know how important a clean nest is. Lost one to rats before. Wasn't fun.

***
HomeHawk12
(It just occurred to me that Ranger probably thought Razz was purring in response to his own purrs, which made him happier and to purr louder. Is that a thing bitties do to bond with each other? If they are nearly asleep or cuddling in the nest they start purring if they feel comforted/safe?)

*Razz’s fingers freeze up, Ranger blinking from his content daze wondering why his massage abruptly ended.*
Ranger: Razz Sans? Are you okay? Why did you stop? ..... and why is your hand warming up?
Razz: *Sinks far into the sofa, entire body blushing purple from embarrassment while Orchid and Blue can’t help but laugh.*

Stretch: Aren’t you guys able to scare rats off with blasters or bones? I heard those things are tough to get rid of.
Drawl: For us they are impossible. We don’t have magical attacks, which is why Tart uses a knife. Scientists didn’t want Bitties attacking their owners for some reason. Floating and shortcut magic seemed acceptable.
Tart: I took down a rat all on my own! It nearly killed me but I bested the beast!!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
(I AM GOING TO SAY YES THAT OURS AT LEAST DO. GOD THAT'S TOO PRECIOUS. AND FUNNY THAT THE BITTIES HAVE ACCEPTED THE SKELETONS AS JUST BIG ASS BITTIES)

Razz: I don't ... purr often Ranger.
Ranger: .... thank you for purring for me then.... if it's that hard.
Razz & Blue & Orchid: *-9999999*

Stretch: .... no attacks?
Drawl: Probably the first ever made bitties in testing did. No one after though. Though those would only be Sansy and Papy ones. Skeletons are the only ones they got to take, but I heard they got some fire bitties in late testing.

***
HomeHawk12
(They are big versions of Bitty types they know, so of course they have come to the obvious conclusion XP)
(Shit Ranger, my heart just took that much damage from the cute jfnfjfkfk I love how he breaks away from the asserted Boss norm to the point where he’s just plain cute and doesn’t even realise it. He has rediscovered his inner Papy lmao)

Razz: *Has decided these bitties are on the same level as children to him, like Lord Hater is. He will now give his life to protect these babies, only being outranked by Orchid in that hierarchy.*

Dente: Your information is a little outdated then.
Floof: Yep. I only left the labs a few months ago. They had actually managed to create goat monster bitties, much like Queen Fluffy Buns over there. They are very sweet Bitties. Getting released to the public next year.

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: the Grillbitties just can't even try to live outside the store or with an owner. They aren't strong enough to keep their flames lit in too strong of winds or too high moisture. They've been out for a year or two.
Drawl: No wonder me and Tart never saw any.
Drawl: Know if they are sticking to skeletons only for the Outer deal?
Floof: There’s a starfire Grillby and Astro Papy too.
Slim: .... wow. That's a lot of monsters.
*Stretch reaches for Tart. Tart hasn't noticed.*
Floof: That’s the common store's stock. There's fancy designer bitties too. Don't know much about them. They’re all made to order in a sense.

............
Ranger: ...... could..... we have something to eat? .... bitties don't..... need much, but we need it often. Small.... size and all.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: O-of course! *Takes Ranger and rushes to the kitchen now in full dad mode.* What would you like to eat? We have some leftovers from Subway, I have some burritos I made earlier in the week too.
Ranger: .... is.... is a burrito a Subway?
Razz: Hey little guys, you all get to try Burritos!

***
Bookwyrm
(Dude. Taquitos. Those tiny, almost burritos.)

Dente: NO CLUE WHAT THAT ARE BUT AWESOME!
Tart: *Eyelights go huge.*
Drawl: I think we found those before...?
Tart: *Takes off for the kitchen.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Dear god that would be so cute XD)

*Razz puts a plate in the microwave to warm up, Tart bouncing up and down with excitement.*
Tart: HURRY UP HURRY UP HURRY UP!!!!
Razz: What’s got you so excited? I thought only Legos did that?
Tart: GIVE ME MY BURRITO!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .... what kind do you want? I have beef or chicken.
Tart: .......I GET TO CHOOSE?!?
Razz: ... I think I might have a just cheese and bean one too?
Tart: .....CAN.... We do... one of each?
Razz: I don't see why not. Three burritos for 5 bitties. I can alway save it for later if you don't finish.

***
HomeHawk12
*Microwave beeps, Razz and Blue rounding up the Bitties so they can all eat at the table.
Razz: Here you go.*
Tart: WHICH ONE SHOULD I EAT FIRST? They are all so beautiful....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: ... I can put a bit of each on your tiny plate?
Tart: YES. HOLY SHIT.
Blue: do you have a dropper or something to put liquid in their tiny cups?

***
HomeHawk12
Floof: You are actually gonna let us use these? I figured you’d just fill a hamster bowl and have us drink from that.
Dente: That is what most owners do.
Razz: .... no, but I have another idea. *Fills up a few water bottle lids and sets them by the Bitties.* Can you fill your cups using that for now?
Dente: Of course!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .... Once I find something adequate, I'll get you cushions for the table.
Floof: cool.
Blue: .....Chara... I think it's time to go and tell your parents what happened.
Kara: ....... *Still in the corner*..... ......ok......
Orchid: ....... Razz, do you need anything sent for these small ones? I wish to help you with their care for what Chara did.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: MORE LEGOS! IN THE GREEN, PURPLE AND CYAN VARIETY! ..... please.
Razz: .... I’ll let you know if they come up with anything else.
Slim: Did you two still want to go visit Kara’s world?

***
Bookwyrm
Demte: I do! Not that I don't appreciate Razzy Sans.... but I think it would be a bit unfair to him. And I am an excellent companion bitty for children! And I am also the best equipped to deal with Floof’s laziness!
Floof: Yeah? .... I mean, I think the cat likes me a bit too much really.
Dente: And bitties are a big responsibility!.... we ....can visit back though, right?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Of course the two of you are welcome anytime.
Orchid: I shall also extend the offer, if any of you decide you wish for a change of households or if things get to be too much for Razz, my home shall be available for any of you to use.
Blue: Ours too!

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: .... Thank you for letting us stay.
Floof: So the parents we meet... are goat monsters too?
Slim: Swapgore and Regalia. So you do know that this is a different universe? And you are going to live in another one?
Floof: .... so? Not much different than what we dealt with already.
Tart: ...... These burritos are the best I've ever had.

***
HomeHawk12
(Bruh Orchid is gonna drop off like 5,000 Legos in the next few days and Tart will turn the living room into his castle lmao)

***
HomeHawk12
*Everyone says their goodbyes after the bitties are done eating. When the house is quiet except for Tart continuing to plan his fort with the others sorting Legos, Razz collapses face first onto the sofa.*

***
Bookwyrm
.............
*Razz slowly wakes from Lord Hater jumping on his back....*
..........
Tart: GET OFF BEAST!
Ranger: What’s going on?!?
Drawl: ..... I think the cat wants to join the cuddle pile on Razz Sans.

***
HomeHawk12
(Shit it’s a Razz cuddle bundle XD)

Razz: W-wha?
Tart: Don’t worry Razz Sans! We will dispel this beast so you can sleep peacefully again!
Slim: .....*Yawn.* What’s the yelling about?
Razz: ..... *Realizes there is a lot of weight on his back ribs and legs. Fishes out his phone and turns the camera to selfie mode. Lord Hater is trying to get comfortable between his shoulder blades while the three Bitties are a bit farther down. Slim is literally laying on top of his legs with his head resting on one of their soft blankets that they used to make a messy nest on his spine.*
Slim: Sorry if this is weird bro. The bitties demanded I join in the cuddle pile, and sleeping next to the couch wasn’t good enough for them.

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz blinks....then blinks again........*
Slim: .... Hater, just sit down.
Tart: No! Shoo! Bitties only!
Ranger: .... if it's just sleeping leave it alone. It's time to sleep and recharge.
Drawl: Who knew big bitties could share so much soul energy.
Razz: ..... I am tired. I am going to sleep.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Never fear Razz Sans! I will make sure the beast doesn’t try anything while you rest!
*Lord Hater is already doing her deep sleep breathing.*
Razz: .... *Snaps a quick photo of his suddenly expanded family, part of his face visible in the bottom corner of the photo. He felt the day was having a worse effect on him then he thought. Hopefully he’d be able to move in the morning.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz is slipping into sleep.... as he does, five sets of purrs demand his own purr.*

Slim: ... are you guys good?
Drawl: *Has his feet on LH, head on Ranger’s side* Yuuuuuuuup.
Ranger: *Snuggles into Tart’s side and Slim’s skull.*
Tart: ..... the beast can stay for now. *Settles in.*

***
HomeHawk12
*By the time morning comes, Tart is snuggled up next to Drawl and cushioning his head against Lord Hater’s leg.*
Tart: *Wakes up, blinking a few times only to realize he was snuggling with the enemy.* AHHHHH! STAY AWAY FROM ME YOU HEAVEN!
Lord Hater: *Yawns, feeling hungry. She stands up, stretches, and hops down ready for breakfast.*
Drawl: Awww..... that was my pillow. Goodbye pillow.
Ranger: I-is it morning? It seems dark still.
Tart: Yes, there is light coming through the curtain.... BIG BITTY SLIM! IT IS TIME TO START THE DAY! WE DEMAND NOURISHMENT!
Slim: *Yawn.* I’m goin I’m goin...... you wanna make breakfast bro? ....... bro?
Razz: .... uggggggggg...... wha?
Slim: Breakfast?
Razz: ..... that sounds nice....... zzzzzz....

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: ..... how's breakfast burritos from the freezer sound?
Tart: Now!
Drawl: Cool. Lemme get the honey the Lil Bro gave me.
Ranger: ... Can I have something to drink?
Slim: ... water, apple juice, or ....... I think we have some tea too. We need to do a grocery run soon.
Razz: B’ito.....pleaz-zzzzzzzz......

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: ....... *Checks his brother’s forehead for a fever. He doesn’t have one.* Are you doing okay Sans? Should I call Toriel?
Razz: I.... I think da frek outs n’ everthn’ else.... took out mu sails.... lazy day pleaz.... zzzzzzz....
Slim: Yeah, you even slept in yesterday’s clothes. That’s really rare.
Tart: BURRITO NOW!

***
Bookwyrm
*Tart commandeers Slim and keeps pushing him for the burritos.*
Slim: Ok ok I get it you want- *LH trips Slim a bit.* I get it you are all hungry.

Razz: ........
Drawl: ..... Razz Sans, you okay?
Razz: Don’t gotta lot of.... energy ta give lately. ....... need more rest.....
Ranger: I’ll stay with Razz Sans if you want to help set up breakfast.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: *Watches his brother hanging onto Slim’s jacket trying to make him move faster.* Yeah, I’ll be back to check on you guys in a few minutes. *Ports away.*
Ranger: *Feels his way closer to Razz’s head, trying to rub his spine like Razz had done to him the other day.*

***
Bookwyrm
Living Room:
*Ranger hits a good spot and starts Razz’s purr up. Ranger's tiny purr follows.*

Kitchen:
Slim: .... I know how to get around the kitchen.
Tart: Burrito in the buzzy death machine. Now.

***
HomeHawk12
(Pfft the buzzy death machine XD)

*Microwave goes off, Slim taking the plate out.*
Tart: ABOUT TIME!!! *Tries to get to the plate before Slim serves anything.*
Slim: Woah kid. Wait your turn. We gotta share the goods.
Tart: BUT I'M HUNGRY!!!!!
Slim: …...

***
Bookwyrm
Kitchen:
Tart:..... fine, I’ll share. But I won't let the burritos get cold!

Graveyard Chat (Everyone):
BlueBerry: Guys, Razz found a new universe with tons of mini uses! *Sends, like, fifty pictures of the bitties.*

Living Room:
Ranger: *Snuggles up to Razz’s skull.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Was closet chat the excitable chat? I don’t remember who was in what lol)

Living Room:
Slim: Here you two go, breakfast burritos. Think you can roll over bro?
Razz: *Yawns.* Yes Yes.... make sure Ranger is out of the way though.

***
Bookwyrm
(Closet was everyone. As in the skeletons in the closet.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Ohhhhh XP that makes more sense now lmao. Took me a minute)

***
Bookwyrm
(I think it and graveyard are the same? Unless graveyard was originally the sans)

Living Room:
*Razz lounges against the arm of the couch, sharing a plate of burritos with Ranger, while the other Bitties ate at the table.*

Kitchen:
Slim: Got you a water. Want any hot sauce for the burritos?
Drawl: Can I get a dab of that? I want to try it.
Tart: *Trying to take a bite of burrito instead of using his utensils.*

***
HomeHawk12
(I don’t think their chat got a funny name? I think we just called the Sans one Older Bro chat and The Papy’s were the Tall Chat?)

***
Bookwyrm
(Lil bro, big bro, lazy chat, excited?)

***
HomeHawk12
(Yeah, that sounds right. I think we just kept those chat names simple. I think we called the Excitable chat the “cool dudes” one at some point too)

Kitchen:
Drawl: Ya know, ya don’t have to eat like that right?
Tart: GREAT FOOD LIKE THIS DESERVES TO BE GORGED UPON PROPERLY!
Drawl: If you say so buddy.

Living Room:
Razz: That was satisfying.
Slim: You feeling any better bro?
Razz: A bit more energised. *Sniffs at his shirt.* Enough to change and take a shower. I smell like the lab and disappointment.*
Ranger: S-Shower?!
Razz: *Yawn.* A bath but faster, you know?
Ranger: W-why would you willingly want a bath?!
Razz: Because I feel gross? This seems like a strange question.
Ranger: ......

Graveyard Chat:
CoolDude: THEY’RE SO ADORABLE!!!! IS THAT A LITTLE ME????
Blueberry: YEP!!! He’s such a cutie and he acts just like you!!!!

Chapter Text

——- Razz VS Legos ——-

***
HomeHawk12
(Bruh Orchid is gonna drop off like 5,000 Legos in the next few days and Tart will turn the living room into his castle lmao)

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: The beast shall be conquered and I will make my dining hall above its prison!
Razz: ....... um.... maybe keep it in one corner of the room? So no one trips?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: *Wakes up in the middle of the night, heading out to grab a glass of water, only for his foot to collide with hard plastic, and the rest of his body landing face first on uneven plastic making a horrible noise.*
Tart: HOW DARE YOU DESTROY THE SOUTH HALLWAY! THAT TOOK ME ALL NIGHT TO BUILD AND NOW HOW WILL I TRICK THE BEAST WHEN THE SUN RISES?!?!
Razz: .....oooowwww....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .....Tart. that hallway is used by people to walk. At least put lights up to let me know its there.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Maybe you should turn the hall light on next time since you can reach it! *Huffs feeling vindicated.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: ........ fair enough. I guess. But remember I reserved the right to remove structures.

***
HomeHawk12
*Razz removes the “South Hallway” from his doorway.*
Tart: NO NOT THE SOUTH HALLWAY!!!!!!
Razz: You can build up, just please don’t build into the walking areas. I’m pretty sure I chipped my skull on another structure.
Tart: OH NO NOT THE BATTLE ARENA!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Ruins can be a decorative feature.

—The Fell Bros vs the Bitty World—

***
Bookwyrm
(..............how.... would Edge and Red take the news on their bitty counterparts?)

***
HomeHawk12
(I think Red would be disgusted, but maintain the “hands off” approach everyone has been keeping with most universes, though I think he’ll be ready to storm over and kill a bitch when he see’s what that world did to the tiny blind version of his brother. Edge would be like “An army of tiny me’s? Of course, I am the greatest at combat so they would want many versions of me!” Then he finds out it’s to be a pet for humans lmao. Something like that?)

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .... the small .... Edgies can become Cherries? *Proceeds to get an army of Bosses to take care of Cherries.*

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: *Starts to prepare his Fell Bitty army to take down the capitalist pigs that decided it was a good idea to abuse versions of his brother until their spirits were broken just so humans could have their caregiving fantasy.*

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: DOWN WITH CAPITALISM!
*A chorus of tiny "down with capitalism!" Chant rings out.*
*One or two Bosses calm the more skittish cherries that got startled.*

Chapter Text

Bookwyrm
Graveyard Chat:
-Sansy: Looks pretty cool.
-BlueBerry: Apparently the mini Comic is called a Sansy! This mini Rus is called a Papy! And his name is Dente! This other one can float and is named Floof!
-CoolDude: That is the best thing I have ever heard.
-Blueberry: They are going to live with Chara for now. Razz has three with him! A mini him, mini Slim, and mini Edge! The mini Edge is so cute.
Gr8nTerrible: What the hell.

Swapfell:
*Tart is in a food coma. He pretty much ate his weight in burritos. Drawl finished up and ported himself and Tart to lay on Slim.*
Razz: .... you three are small enough the sink would be like a sort of shower. I'll have to cut pieces of soap off the bar for you to use. I think I have a shallow tupperware you can use as a bath. I can almost feel the grime on me.
*Ranger doesn't look convinced.*

***
HomeHawk12
Graveyard Chat:
-Blueberry: Yes! The tiny Edge loves scratches and purrs super loud! Oh! And he has this adorable comfort toy he calls his soft thing!
-Gr8nTerrible: What the hell?!?! I am not cute!
-Blueberry: No, the little Edge is cute, not you. Oh! I should warn everyone so you don’t make the same mistake I did! The little Edge is blind so you have to be super careful with him. The other Bitties are super protective.
-ElasticWasteband: Yeah, the little Razz will cut you. He has a knife.
-Gr8nTerrible: Again, what the hell.

Swapfell:
Razz: Come on Tart, you're covered in cheese. You need a bath most of all.
Tart: Urrrrggggg.... too full, five more minutes.
Razz: Come on. I need you to help Ranger out.
Drawl: I can help him.
Ranger: *Feeling the edge of the Tupperware that Slim just put water into.* It’s warm......

***
Bookwyrm
Graveyard Chat:
-ElasticWasteland: Apparently they are mass produced and don't have any blasters or attacks. So the tiny Razz found a knife, and will cut you if you touch his legos. My hand is all cut up. The tiny Slim has a cowboy accent.
-Blueberry: I am pretty sure their experiences heavily shape their personality. And Ranger, the little Edge, has no idea when or if he is blushing so he never hides it! The tiny Razz is named Tart and he is adorable too.
-Gr8nTerrible: ....... I need to see these tiny skeletons.
-Chompers: Boss let them get settled in.
-Gr8nTerrible: I wish to assess them.
-LoveyDovey: Do you have any pictures with Razz and the bitties?
-BlueBerry: Yes, but I am not sharing. Those death games were really well done.

Swapfell:
......
*Ranger likes this warm bath thing. Tart is very lethargic when he is put in the bath.*

***
HomeHawk12
Graveyard Chat:
-SlimPickens: Hold on, I’ll ask my bro if he is willing to share.
-Blueberry: Wait, don’t tell him I took anything!
-SlimPickens: He took a couple himself last night.
-Chompers: ..... well shit that’s a first.

Swapfell:
Drawl: *Uses the warm soapy water like a hot tub.* This is the life. I like this life.
Razz: Can you keep an eye on them while I clean up?
Slim: Sure thing. Oh, Blue told the others about the Bitties, and they wanna see pictures of the Fell ones. Mind sharing your pic from the other night?

***
Bookwyrm
*Razzmatazz sent a photo.*
Razzmatazz: SHIT NOT THAT ONE!
Blueberry: THAT CUDDLE PILE LOOKS SO CUTE<3
Razzmatazz: DON'T LOOK.
Chompers: Like kittens all curled up
Razzmatazz: SHUT IT.
Gr8nTerrible: Is that the mini me snuggled into you?
Razzmatazz: NO. STOP LOOKING.
Sansy: Looks comfy.
Razzmatazz: FUCK OFF.

Swapfell:
.....
*Tart has gotten more awake once the food *settles.*
Tart: ..... These bubbles are nice.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: *Trying to rub himself with the soap like Razz recommended.* Is this right?
Slim: Looking good buddy.
*Everyone hears Razz shout from the bathroom.*
Razz: FUCK OFF YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNTS!!!!
Ranger: D-did we do something wrong???
Slim: Nah, my bro just embarrassed himself.

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: What did he do?
Slim: Sent the wrong pic. He doesn't like people seeing how soft he can be. See? *Shows phone.*
Tart: ...... are those the other skeletons you said are talking to him?
Slim: Yep.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: What does the conversation say?
Slim: Basically, they are talking about how awesome all of you guys are and how Razz looks like a well adjusted dad.
Razz: I AM NOT!!!! SHUT UP!!!
Slim: Would you get cleaned up already?! We are having a conversation.
...... *Razz turns the shower on.*

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: Looks like Edge wants to see you guys. He looks like Ranger. Or what you would call a boss bitty.
Tart: Why does he want to come?
Slim: Probably curious, and he likes to look after small skeletons. His brother is like an Edgy.
Drawl: .... so there's more big bitties?
Slim: ... basically.
Ranger: ..... you'll tell them to not grab us, right?

*Razz is trying to drown his embarrassment in the shower.*

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: I’ll make sure they are well aware, though Blue and Stretch gave a heads up.
Ranger: O-oh.... that’s good to hear.
Tart: I SUPPOSE I can allow visitors, but only if they bring me a peace offering.
Slim: What did you want?

Graveyard Chat:
SlimPickens: The little guys seem okay with meeting you all at sometime. The only requirement they have is you guys bring a box of Legos in a specific color variety on you visit.
Gr8nTerrible: ...... Are they okay with visitors today?

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: You guys want to see them today?
Tart: Only if there are legos.
Drawl: Sure.
Ranger: .... Razz will be there?
Slim: Probably.

***
HomeHawk12
*Razz steps out of the bathroom in his purple hoodie and sweatpants, deciding the hoodie is a nice place to live and burying himself under a fuzzy blanket on the couch. He feels like napping again.*
Slim: Edge and Red wanna stop by and meet the little guys.
Razz: ...... I’m not cooking for anyone today.
Slim: I can see if the Fells can pick something up.

***
Bookwyrm
Underfell:
Edge: .......*Sees the text*....... Sans, get my lasagna noodles and sauce. I need to pick up beef and Legos.
Red: Kay Boss.
Edge: .... do you think they will need anything to properly enjoy lasagna?
Red: No clue.

Swapfell:
*Razz settles into the couch. Ranger now clean, has Drawl points him in the right direction to get couch cuddles.*

***
HomeHawk12
Underfell:
Edge: Hmmmmmmm..... I’ll ask Slim if they need extra supplies.

Swapfell:
Slim: Edge is asking if we need anything extra.
Razz: *Ranger and LH both snuggle up on his chest.* I don’t know..... droppers for their drinks? Tell him to grab a G-rated film or two as well. I don’t wanna spook the little guys with my horror films.

***
Bookwyrm
Underfell:
Edge: ... Sans, what's G rated?
Red: ... I think Disney will be good enough.
Edge: ..... and droppers...... they... are small enough to use fluffy slippers as beds Sans.

***
HomeHawk12
(Edge is gonna wanna storm that universe on his own and just steal the whole store and be their new mom djdnfk)

Underfell:
Red: ...... *Seeing Edge’s eyelights unintentionally sparkling at the news*...... I’ll put fuzzy slippers on the list too.

Swapfell:
Razz: Remember Ranger can’t see what’s going on and doesn’t want him to freak at any intense scenes. And ask if he can find a copy with Audio Descriptions for the visually impaired.
Slim: ..... that’s a thing?
Razz: One of my co-workers has a blind kid. I picked up a few things.

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge leading the Toriels and Asgores into the Bittiverse)

Underfell:
Edge: ..... they are very small Sans.
Red: We got Frisk running around. Don't try to get the code off Slim and Razz.
Edge: .... you know more about electronics. You find the audio thingy.

Swapfell:
Tart: Drawl! I need a hand with completing the interior wall! And the beast keeps trying to steal pieces!

***
HomeHawk12
(Red is ruining Edge’s fun..... we’ll see how he feels after meeting them.)

At the Rental Store:
Red: *Couldn’t find films in Walmart with that function, so he had to go elsewhere.* Can’t believe I had ta go through all this bullshit just ta find a stupid movie....
Clerk: Here are your movies, sir.
Red: About time! *Grabs the movies and returns to the house with a very impatient Edge and finished lasagna.*
Edge: There you are! You took forever!
Red: Either bite me and shut up or get moving!!!

Swapfell:
LH: *Batting at the Lego pieces on the outside of Tart’s piles.*
Tart: BACK YOU SAVAGE!!!! THESE ARE STILL MINE!!!!
Drawl: Feel like giving me a hand Ranger?
Ranger: *Listening to Razz’s quiet purrs in his sleep.* L-later perhaps.

***
Bookwyrm
(Ranger is a cuddle bug aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa)

Underfell:
Edge: Now! I have my pan, my ingredients, my offerings...... What am I missing? Anything?
Red: Nothing Boss. Let's go already.
Edge: Ah yes, the sarcasm.

Swapfell:
Tart: DON'T YOU CHEW ON THAT, BEAST!
Slim: Maybe we should get you a tiny squirt gun or something?

***
HomeHawk12
(He is a literal bean making up for years of neglect because he can do it safely jfbfndk)

Swapfell:
*Knock at the door.*
Razz: *Awoken by the Fell brother’s banter in the hallway.* Ugggggggg...... people.....
Slim: You just stay on the couch and rest easy. I’ll take care of the guest today.
Razz: As long as they don’t need me for anything, I’ll be happy.
Tart: GREAT! NOW MORE LEGO THIEVES HAVE ARRIVED?!?! HOW MUCH TORMENT MUST I ENDURE- YOU GET BACK HERE WITH THAT GREEN BRICK!!!!’ *Chases after a thieving Lord Hater.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Slim greets the fell bros.*
Slim: Hey, nice to see you-
Tart: RELEASE ME AT ONCE YOU FOUL CREATURE! WHY ARE YOU LICKING ME!?! IT SMELLS AWFUL AND I JUST TOOK A BATH!
Edge: ..... having troubles?
Slim: ..... Can you guys find the kitchen while I check that?

***
HomeHawk12
Kitchen:
*Edge and Red find the kitchen easily, as it’s next to the front door.*
Edge: Look brother! There is a tiny table and chairs on the normal table. They are so small.....
Red: These cups are the tiniest things ever, no wonder they were asking for droppers. Just what exactly are we dealing with here?

Hallway:
*Slim looks down the hallway to see Lord Hater giving Tart her version of a bath, as any good kitty would do to fellow housemates. She has him trapped between her front legs.*
Tart: RELEASE ME! DOWN! SHOOOO! MAKE IT STOOOOOOPPPPP!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Hallway:
Slim: Hold on Tart, I'll rescue you. Go on kitty, shoo.
LH: Meeeeow. *Races off to investigate the kitchen.*
Slim: Wanna see what Edge and Red brought?
Tart: the Legos?
Slim: They probably have it with them.

Kitchen:
Edge: *Setting up the kitchen*.... oh, hello there.
LH: Mrow.
Edge: *Offers hand to LH.* You are quite curious aren't you.
Red: I got the stuff for the tinies out.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: Oh good, hopefully they will be acceptable offerings.
LH: Mrow! *Rubbing up against Edge’s leg, doing the same to Red, then going back to repeat the process.*
Edge: My my, you are a very good kitty, yes you are-
Tart: A BEAST SYMPATHISER!
Edge: Huh? *Looks up to see Slim hold a very tiny version of Razz in a little cowboy outfit, pointing at him accusingly.*
Red: Shit. You guys weren’t kidding when you said they’re tiny.

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: I think Razz likes that there are shorter Sanses now. Don't tell him that though.
Tart: I was promised Legos Slim! If I have to tolerate intruders, I expect compensation!
Red: Lil firecracker isn't he?
Tart: What’s that?
Edge: ......... I have the goods.

Living Room:
Drawl: … hey Ranger, mind if I mosey on up there?
Ranger: No, there's room for us both.

***
HomeHawk12
(Ranger is a good boy sharing all the snuggles.)

Edge: *Presents a box of bricks exactly the same as the one he got yesterday. Edge spared no expense.*
Tart: YEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!! GIMME GIMME GIMME!!!!!
Slim: You could at least tell him your name.
Tart: NAME NOT IMPORTANT! I MUST CREATE!!!!
Slim: ..... his name is Tart. Bring the Legos to the living room and I’ll introduce the others. Razz in particular had a really stressful time yesterday, and he didn’t recover very well at all. Please don’t egg him on or anything. He needs rest.
Red: What exactly happened anyways? Blue was too excited about the little guys to explain everything.
Slim: I’m not even sure where to start....

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: ... Basically, the two Charas ran off to explore the Underground, decided to hop to a new verse, run rampant there, break into a house, and steal these guys from the store that they were sold in. All while evading Razz and I.
Red: Damn.
Tart: SLIM PUT ME DOWN AND HELP ME GET THE NEW STOCK IN THE FRONT ROOM. I NEED TO START NOW. THE BEAST HAS BEEN AWFUL AND THE DUNGEON NEEDS TO BE BUILT.
Edge: How are you structuring it?
Tart: .........*Ignoring them.*
Slim: .... maybe ask him once we are in the living room? And grab the pamphlets, we already sent copies to Underswap.

***
HomeHawk12
*Slim leads them to the living room, where Lord Hater is on her back playing with the unguarded Legos, Razz is snuggled under a fuzzy blanket snoozing with his hood up, and Ranger and Drawl are curled up with each other on his chest partially under the blanket.
Tart: MY LEGOS ARE UNDER ATTACK!!! GET AWAY FROM MY CASTLE YOU INSUFFERABLE BEAST!!!
LH: Mrow?
Tart: SLIM HELP ME PUNISH IT!!!!
Drawl: Uggggg.... bro, you’re really loud..... *Notices the newcomers.* Damn, that one really does look like Ranger... with different scarring.

***
Bookwyrm
*Ranger pops out of the blanket.*
Ranger: ...hm? What?
Red: I’ll be damned. Look at the lil guy. Down right adorable.
Ranger: *Red faint on his face*.... uh....
Red: ..... Boss....BOSS.
Tart: SLIM, IT HAS THE 2 BY 8!
Slim: Hater, cmon. Leave Tart’s stuff alone. I know it's cool. Go sniff Edge and Red or something.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: *Turning around after putting the Lego box down.* What is it R- *Spots the tiny version of himself poking his head from the blanket*..... dear god I am adorable.
Ranger: H-hello? Who’s there? I-is this the guest Razz mentioned?
Edge: *Gets closer.* He’s blind, yes? How much can he see? *Raises his hand to wave in front of Ranger’s face, only for Razz to snatch it.*
Razz: *Single eyelight illuminates.* I know for a fact you’ve been warned. No touching without his permission.

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: Um, uh.
Razz: He can't see detail well. He can tell movement better.
Edge: I wasn't touching him-
Razz: Personal space. Edge.

Red: *Was watching the tiny razz tare into the box with sheer joy*......... Boss, you were warned ‘bout him. They are like … in stripes, even if they look like adults.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: I.... I don’t think I understand?
Razz: Honestly, they are more similar to adults than you’d think, they just lack the experiences we’ve had that matured our personalities to where they are. *Motions towards Tart still reeling through the Lego pile.* Acts like me when I actually have piss and vinegar to spare.... though the death games really brought that side out of me for a short time. Physically they are delicate like striped shirts..... and some need the emotional support of striped shirts due to.... well, you have the pamphlets, yes?

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: No I just got them.
Razz: You should read them before interacting with the bitties.

Slim: Tart, you need a hand for your wall?
Tart: If you can handle it. I suppose.

Drawl: *Ports on Red’s head.* So. You a Cherry or an Edgy?
Red: What the fuck does that mean?
Drawl: Edgy then.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: *Flipping through the pamphlet. * “Edgy Bitty types are based on the Sansey variety. Vocal, irritable and prone to chewing on everything, this is a Bitty recommended for experienced Bitty owners only. It is also recommended a Boss Bitty be adopted alongside them to keep them in check.”
Red: Heh, sounds like me.
Drawl: See? You're a giant Edgy type.
Red: Still don’t understand what the hell you’re talking about.

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: There’s versions of us and many other kinds in their stores. It said that the Axe and Traps bitties are from a horror themed line. And are good for protecting home farms and property from predators and pest animals. The space ones are cool tho. Floof can literally float.
Edge: Red, read this one, I finished it. *Grabs another one.*
Drawl: Wosh, is your gold tooth real? Most Edgies are born with the color.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Course it is, I can thank babybones Edge for the loss of the real one too.
Edge: You said we could play superheroes! How was I supposed to know charging head first into your face would knock a tooth out?!
Red: WHATEVER! Still, that’s frickin’ weird. Why would ya be born with a gold tooth?
Drawl: Ask the scientist who made us.
Red: *Looking through the pamphlet.* “Cherry Bitty types are for anyone who loves the look of the Edgy Bitties, but lacks the experience to keep them contained. Cherries are a subdued, shy, and well behaved Bitty that will latch onto their owners for life. They constantly seek affection and comfo-“ WHAT THE HELL?! That doesn’t sound anything like me!
Drawl: They do bad things to the Edgys from birth to make them that way.... never liked being in the same cages as ‘em. Poor things cried all the time.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: The hell???
Drawl: Cherries are Edgies that broke. The labs have it down to an art. So much so, Cherries pretty much bond to any nice gesture they get.
Ranger: .... they haven't found a method for the other Fells yet. The Cherries at the store.... most of the bosses try to look after them a bit. I would before my first adoption.

***
HomeHawk12
(Reminds me of the “Learned helplessness” from the old animal experiments)

***
Bookwyrm
(Cherries are to be protected and given safe spaces)

***
HomeHawk12
Red: ..... that’s fucked up.
Drawl: You ain’t kidding.
Edge: *Standing there staring at the image of the Cherry in his pamphlet, the face of his brother scared, desperate and beyond recognition. His claws poked through the pages when his grip tightened in rage.*
Red: So Ranger, ya said ya tried helpin’ the little guys before you were adopted. Something happen?
Ranger: Y-yes.... I was adopted because I looked cool, but due to my eyesight, I wasn’t as entertaining as they hoped..... the teenager was very sadistic....

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: .... at least they didn't realize he kinda got a cherry treatment.
Ranger: ..... I.... am grateful I got out at least. Not everyone does.
Tart: Ranger! How's your depth perception? I need to know for my stairs!

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: Terrible. Only one socket remotely works, so I don’t have any.
Tart: Good to know!
Drawl: *Teleports onto Red’s shoulder, whispering into his ear hole.* He’s the most Cherry-like Boss I’ve met. Hard to imagine what a Boss Bitty had to go through just to warp his personality that much without him dusting out a pure stubbornness. That’s the issue the labs have been running into with other Fell Bitty types.
Red: *Looking between his dignified brother, and the far meeker, helpless Ranger that seems obsessed with positive contact. Imagining anyone doing horrible things to such a little version of his bro.... really pisses him off.*

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: Slim, I need green and purple to alternate steps so Ranger can tell them apart. And blue for the walls. It's good I got more! I can make another level with these!
*Slim dutifully hands over the pieces.*
Ranger: ..... *Moves to scratch Razz into more purrs, he knows how hard it is for Razz to start a purr! So Ranger purrs and pets for Razz to follow his example. After all, Bitties need contact when feeling low!*
*Razz doesn't realize what Ranger is doing, and purrs back in his sleep.*
Drawl: I never thought I'd see big bitties like you guys. They couldn't keep a soul formed long enough in the labs. That's why we need to be round stable souls or we'll dust after a few days if we're lucky.
Red: ...you getting enough of that soul time then?
Drawl: More steady source now that we got Razzy Sans and Slim.
LH: *Jumps up to sniff at Ranger on Razz..... ta lick da bitty.*

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: *Freaking out at the weird sensation.* AH! W-what is this rough thing?!?! Razz Sans?!
Razz: Shhhhhh.... Lord Hater is showing she cares about you. It’s a cat thing. Come here girl, leave him be. *Holds his hand in LH’s face, getting her to lick him instead.*
Red: So what’s with the southern thing.
Drawl: I thought you’d never ask!

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: It started one dry summer day, when I was born under that very couch. Now we weren't the most rich folk, but ma always worked hard ta keep food on the table-
Tart: We are variants of a Raspberry and SlimJim. Born in a lab like all bitties. No parents to know. Slim I need a 4 by 4.
Drawl: ....Tart, I was havin’ fun.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: He always has to ruin my stories.....
Tart: GET BETTER AT TELLING THEM OR SHUT THE HELL UP!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Does anyone want to watch a movie? I’m sure the little guys would love to see the child friendly videos you chose.

***
Bookwyrm
(Aka shut up so Razz can be unconscious.)

*Ranger is purring loudly against Razz’s skull as all the bitties use him as a cuddle base again. The bitties thinking it will help Razz recharge. Because they haven't quite entirely realized Razz doesn't have a bitty-like soul. None of the skeletons do. It's very awkward when the bitties insist that everyone be next to Razz for cuddle time.*

***
HomeHawk12
(I really need to get back to proof reading Light Drizzles, but I keep getting distracted with doodles. Not sure if you can tell what it’s referring to, drawing is really rough still imao)

***

Bookwyrm
(It’s the family selfish.
Selfie.
It’s too cute man)

***
HomeHawk12
(Yep! Hopefully I can get it to a more drawn out level, but I just realized it's late and I have stuff in the morning lol)

***
Bookwyrm
(Yeeeeeee)

***
Bookwyrm
*Edge and Red are.... not too uncomfortable with the forced bitty pile.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Ah yes the babies being adorable ^^ that’s where we left off snsbdbf)

Edge: I’ve never seen The Little Mermaid before..... I like how red her hair is.
Red: I like her bra- OW!
Edge: Behave in front of the stripped shirts!
Ranger: .... What's a bra?
Edge: LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: A thing humans wear when they have chest things. Boobs I think they are called.
Ranger: ... the place Edgies like to ride on if they can get away with it?
Drawl:Yeah.
Tart: WHY AREN'T THE MERMAIDS GREEN, BLUE, AND PURPLE?!? THAT'S MERMAID COLORS. NOT RED OR YELLOW!
Drawl: maybe that's how mermaids are here?
Tart: .......BUT THAT'S NO EXCUSE! MERMAID STUFF IS ALWAYS PURPLE, BLUE, GREEN, OR EVEN PINK!

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: You are being very closed minded, Tart. The three of you guys aren’t normal as far as Bitty standards go, yeah? Maybe non-standard mermaids are more accepted here. Ariel’s tail is green and her shells are purple.
Tart: Hmmmmmmm..... perhaps you have a point. I will accept that explanation.
Audio Description: “Angry, the king destroys Ariel’s collection as she looks on in horror, begging him not to.” *Accompanied by the original scary destructive noises.*
Red: Heh, the descriptions are kind of fun. It’s like an audiobook, but for a movie.
Slim: That woman’s descriptive voice is very soothing…

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: .......... so the magazine I found about mermaid stuff was mermaid racist?
Red: Pfffffft, what???
Drawl: ..... oh that one thing a human left? The top trends for teens one?
Tart: .... I can't believe it was mermaid racist.
Red: What does that even mean?

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: I think he means racist against mermaids.
Tart: That’s what I said! What was so hard to understand about that!?
Razz: ....zzzzz......
Drawl: Stop snoring Razz Sans. I’m trying to watch the movie.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: ..... so you read teen magazines?
Tart: There’s not a lot to do in abandoned houses besides what's laying around and looking for things.
Razz: .............zz......
Drawl: Razz, shhhh. It's loud next to your skull.
Edge: ........ she has never met him, why does she love him already?

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Maybe she just loves the idea of him? He looks roughly her age, and he has legs. Clearly she has a thing for legs. Her opinion might change after a few dates.
Edge: She had better hope it works then, looks like she is going to make a deal.
Razz: ... z...... z.....
Drawl: Ugggg! *Teleports on top of Red’s head. Far quieter over here.*

***
Bookwyrm
Red: She totally has a human kink.
Edge: Sans, shut up.
Drawl: ..... *Was getting cosy.... but... oh! Red’s hood is fluffy.*
Slim: .... so, um. You liking the movie Tart?

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: .... It is acceptable. It needs more time with the mermaids though.
Ranger: T-thank you for getting the special version for me.... I-I didn’t know films came with this kind of stuff for p-people like me....
Red: Believe me, not many do- OW!!!
Edge: What he meant to say is it was no trouble at all. We also got the Lion King.
Drawl: ...... zzzzz......

***
Bookwyrm
Red: ...weren't you just upset about snoring. *Pokes Drawl.*
Drawl: ....zzzz........
Slim: The Lion King sounds nice for the next movie.
Tart: ... The witch looks sooooo cool.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: ~Those POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS!!!!!~
Razz: W-wha???? I’m up I’m.... zzzzz......
Tart: I like the songs! This Ariel lady is kind of a brat though.

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: ....it is pretty.
Red: That crab just needs to retire man. The dude needs a break.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: .... I don’t think retirement would be an option, at least self opted retirement.
Red: Oh yeah, your benefits in the Guard kind of sucked, didn’t they.
Edge: Asgore refused to give us dental, the cheap bastard.

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: We got a bit, our Toriel seemed to really like Razz. Razz did dote on her every order and want though.
Tart: ....the chef is hilarious.......... is that how people really cook?

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: Not competent chefs, no.
Ranger: It says the witch is walking out of the ocean. I hear Ariel’s voice though?
Red: She’s using the voice she stole from Ariel to cast a curse on the prince.... I think. I may need ta look up a plot summary...

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: That prince is useless! Just stab the witch! Where are the cannons!
Slim: Dunno.
Ranger: So, I can kinda see a wiggly purple thing. Is that the witch?
Red: Yeah, it is.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Wait.... The witch became a giant octopus!
Red: Pretty sure Ariel’s gonna die.
Edge: I told you to get G rated films!
*Prince crashes a ship into the witch, impaling her.*
Tart: YESSSSS! TAKE THAT YOU OCTOBITCH!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .....................*He has been dozing cus these boys are loud.*
Red: Look, Disney is ‘bout as good as you get on short notice
Edge: Hm.
Slim: I think it's good.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: That was AWESOME! I want my castle to look like the water kingdom there!!!!!
Edge: Are you ready for Lion King?
Tart: MORE CASTLES YESSSSS!

***
Bookwyrm
Red: What kind of castle would a lion even have. I like the ass monkey on the cover.
Edge: Red, don't be crude.
Slim: Chara said they liked this movie a lot.
Tart: .... Slim? Can you work the buzzy death machine?....... I have the popping corn in my stash but it needs that thing.

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Sure thing pal. Bring it out and I’ll get it ready.
Tart: ALRIGHT!!!
Razz: ...... sigh....... *Still so tired, but the best he’s getting is just to lie down and listen to the banter.*

***
Bookwyrm
*The popcorn is big to the bitties.*

*Drawl sleep ports to lay in the bowl.
Edge: .... that's not sanitary.*

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: We were living in the couch of an abandoned drug house for six months… and that was an upgrade from our previous place. I even had a bath this morning….. zzzzz...
Tart: *Starts munching on his own piece, handing one to Ranger.* Quiet everyone! It’s starting!

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .....fair enough. I will allow this.... behavior for now. Just until you know better.
Tart: ......wait, where’s the fucking castle.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: ....Pride Rock?! Who the hell wants to live on a rock?!?!
Drawl: Animals that can’t build castles?
Razz: ..... It is a cool looking rock.
Tart: IT’S STILL A ROCK!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: You can always build your castle to be grander than their rock.
Tart: damn right I will. It will be the greatest one ever.
Drawl: Sure will.
Tart: The beast won't be able to break out!
Red: ....you want to trap the cat in Legos?
Tart: YES!

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: I will conquer that thing, mount it like the all powerful being that I am, and it will have no choice but to yield to my every command!
Red: .... pffft.
Edge: Red, for the love of god I will slap you again.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: I can't help it, he's tiny and angry.
Tart: ..... what are those hyenas doing? ....oh no. Not Simba!
Ranger: .... Are they trying to kill him? Oh.

***
HomeHawk12
(It’s done!)

***

Bookwyrm
(Look at the babies omg)
(Da Legos)

***
HomeHawk12
(He will defend his Legos with his life. He’s already mad for getting distracted lol)

***
Bookwyrm
(How dare Dente do a speech now. His Legos need all his attention)

***
HomeHawk12
(He doesn’t care how grateful Dente is to have new friends, the only friends he needs are a licensed children’s building material fhfgfvd)

***
Bookwyrm
(Wait a minute, is Tart making nail Legos for a trap?)

***
HomeHawk12
(Humans stepping on regular Legos produces pain, but no blood. He is determined to fix that..... by adding pointy bits.... no one will “accidentally” step on his structures again.)

***
Bookwyrm
(I do not envy any burglar that hits that apartment.)

Chapter Text

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: W-what was that?!
Drawl: Simba’s dad. It’s okay, they are not gonna kill the kid.
Ranger: That's a relief.
Tart: I do like this.... Elephant Graveyard, was it? That would make for cool decoration in the dungeon.
Red: I don’t think that cat will fit in there with the extra bones.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: .... I could get small bones. Like bird or something.
Razz: Don’t... be dragging corpses in. Got ‘nough of those......
Ranger: Shhhhh.... you're supposed to be sleeping.
Slim: You can't get green lava either.
Red: They got a real life looking one a’ these films too. Wonder what's the difference?
Edge: Corporate greed.

***
HomeHawk12
(Ranger being a good nurse. Not letting Razz waste his energy flfjfjfh)

Tart: I can create a similar ambiance with a green lava lamp!
Edge: The saluting hyenas remind me of being a guardsman under Fellgore, though they have far greater numbers.
Red: According to the internet, they are supposed ta represent Nazis.
Edge: The extra racist humans that not even humans like talking about?
Red: That’s the ones.
Slim: That’s..... darker then I expected.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: Human history is fucked up. Don’t know if you got mostly the same lot we got, but yeah.
Slim: So when do we get to more cute songs?

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: ...... is he dusting?

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Non monster corpses don’t dust, remember? It’s why there was an elephant graveyard. Doesn’t look like we’ll get ta watch him decompose though.
Ranger: So Simba’s dad is dead? He just watched his dad die?
Tart: .... can we watch the wildebeest stampede again? That was really cool.

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .... so, not to pull from the movie, but when can we start on Red’s room? I'm free this weekend.
Razz: ....don't got energy now. Ask me later.
Slim: Maybe after we finish it Tart.
Tart: Is Simba gonna eat the pig?

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: EWWW THEY EAT BUGS INSTEAD! WITHOUT COOKING THEM EVEN!
Drawl: At least we get to eat popcorn instead. And you’ve eaten a bug before.
Tart: I was desperate! And those homeless people had a fire going! I was able to cook it!
Ranger: You..... you sound really defensive about this.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: .....It was a low point!
Ranger: I mean, there are pest control bitties. They eat lots of things.
Tart: ......I can't believe they really do that.
Ranger: They are well received in rural areas. I think they were a Halloween line at first.
Drawl: ..... man they look comfy.
......
Tart: TEAR THE PIG A NEW ONE GIANT BEAST!

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: URGGGG! Not a love song!
Ranger: I think it sounds pretty.....
Drawl: Why are you upset?
Tart: Because they hadn’t seen each other since they were babies! And now after hanging out for a few hours they are already in love? That is unrealistic!
Red: Ta be fair, I noticed on the animal channel that creatures tend ta have quick sex a lot, after like, 5 seconds of meeting. We do it too. It’s called prosta-
Tart: SHUT UP THIS ISN’T MEANT TO BE A QUICK FLING.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: ROYALTY ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE MORE THOUGHT INTO A MARRIAGE!
Red: Pretty sure they are engaged, even though they are cousins.
Tart: HE IS ROYALTY THE FUCK.
Red: Pretty sure-
Edge: Stripes, Red.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: Heheheheheh! Hoola pig....
Tart: I don’t like how scar turned into a pansy....
Ranger: The screen is getting really orange?
Tart: And the rock is on fire!
Red: Pretty sure it’s the foliage-
Tart: Did you see any plant growth on that rock? Or even below the rock?! The rock is burning!

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: .......YES FIGHT! TEAR OUT THROATS!!! *Is jumping excitedly.*
Razz: Oof.
Tart: KILL HIM!
Red: Who you cheering for?
Tart: BOTH EITHER WHO CARES!!!???!!!

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: I..... I’m a little concerned by your dedication to them killing each other.....
Red: *Glances over a bit incredulous, but doesn’t say anything. Even though he looks and sounds like Edge, he’s not HIS Edge.*
Razz: See, you’re worrying people T- Oof.... maybe stop jumping on me Tart-
Ranger: Shhhhhh. Stop being awake Razz Sans. You're supposed to be recharging.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Then Tart needs to settle down. After the movie you can have everyone help build your dungeon or something.
Tart: YES!
Drawl: That would speed it up.
Edge: I’ll be checking the lasagna first.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: I liked that movie. The music was very nice.
Tart: OKAY EVERYONE HELP ME BUILD!!!!
Red: Eh, whatcha need me ta do?
Tart: Keep the beast away so I can work!
Razz: *Looking down at Ranger.* You should help Tart build.
Ranger: But I want to make sure you are recharging.
Razz: I’ll be fine. I’m sure he could use help sorting all the bricks.
Ranger: .....

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: He needs your opinion on keeping it Ranger friendly. I’ll be okay.
Ranger: ..... You sure?

Red: So I got the cat.
Tart: Hold the beast, I need measurements.

***
HomeHawk12
*Lord Hater goes completely lax in Red’s grip, exuding that long cat energy for days.*
Tart: Beast! What are you doing!?!?! How can I measure you if you are doing this?!?! SLIM JIM FIX IT!!!!!
Slim: ..... look, I’d help, but I don’t wanna accidentally anger my bro.
Tart: TRAITOR!!!!
Razz: *Suddenly really wanting some meds for his growing headache, and a coffee for the extra energy. Slowly he shuffles over to the kitchen where Edge has his lasagna in the stove cooling. He is staring at a Bitty pamphlet..... thoughtfully......*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Walks into the kitchen searching drawers.* I don’t care what you do. Just don’t go without a heavily thought out plan. There aren’t any monsters there. Now where did I put my damn coffee…. and some damn headache medicine.
Edge: You heard what they said.
Razz: Bullets hurt and humans are trigger happy. Have a good before and after plan. If you storm that universe, how will you care for them? ......oh thank the Queen. *Holds the meds up.*

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: The address for the HQ of the lab that produces them is on the pamphlet. Of course, it would require several scouting trips ahead of time, learning their security details, where important information is kept, like their production formulas.... I’m not as stupid as you may think.
Razz: I know you’re not stupid, you just have a quick temper and minimal control over it.... and I forgot to empty the coffee grounds from the last use.
Edge: Blue mentioned you had spoken with your Toriel about this, yes? Perhaps we could talk to the royals among other universes..... perhaps seeing if we can find homes among them..... get housing planned ahead of time.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Long as you have a plan. I won't give you the code unless you do. Sometimes poorly planned help can be worse than no help. I can't say the same for Slim. And if my Queen orders it I will give it. The machine drops you in front of a store in that universe.
Edge: You doubt me?
Razz: *Sips his drink.... blech..... good enough*..... I think you have a noble cause that needs more direction. You're talking about traveling into an alternate universe and completely going up against established organizations that don't recognize you exist, let alone have rights. Again.

***
HomeHawk12

***
Bookwyrm
(Razz you know you love them.)
(And both Drawl and Slim have similar comfy positions.)

***
HomeHawk12
(They made themselves cozy with the local best Snas, and he has no choice but to fall for everything small and bitty.)

Edge: I’m a monster obsessed with change, you should have seen the revolution plans against Fellgore..... then the human fell and it got scrapped. All for the better regardless.
Razz: *Sip.*
Edge: Was that before or after you had gotten the machine working?
Razz: ..... before.
Edge: If that’s the case, then it should drop us at the machine pad now.... unless there is a malfunction I’m unaware of...... my Alphys also owes me..... could have her come and do some hacking into their computers...... my Asgore may be too much of a duck to want to offer assistance..... Would you be upset if I spoke to your queen about it?
Razz: *Flinches at another long sip.* As I said, if she wishes for assistance to be given, I will help.

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: I was asking about you personally, not what orders you would be given.
Razz: I’ll follow any order my Queen decrees. She has my utmost loyalty. Does it matter?
Edge: ... yes, it does.
Razz: Hmmmmm. *Sips.*
Edge: ......
Razz: There’s not much I wouldn't do for my Queen. Even if it is completely against my wants. Because I am loyal and I hope that she wouldn't take advantage of it, but that's a real possibility. She could take advantage of me.
Edge: You didn't plan a rebellion?
Razz: Nope. I crushed them.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: .....why? You really had no problems with the way things were run? How the people suffered?
Razz: I was built and trained to be a weapon from my creation, and that’s precisely what I was. You may have joined the Guard of your world voluntarily, working your way up from the bottom. I could see how your rebellious views would develop from that.... but I was made as Captain Gaster’s successor from the very beginning.
Edge: .... lasagna is ready. I need to take a quick trip to.... purchase more Legos.
Razz: That’s the excuse you are going with?
Edge: ..... *Steps out of the apartment.*
Razz: Food is finished. Who is ready to eat?

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: ONE SECOND I GOTTA FINISH THE BALCONY. IT’S GONNA LET ME GAZE AT MY PRISONERS WHEN I FEEL SUPERIOR!
Red: Cool. *Gets up to go to the kitchen.*
Razz: Ranger? Drawl? Tart? You want lasagna?
Ranger: ... what's that?
Razz: I'll make you plates anyway, I guess.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: ..... I can’t believe I’ve spent my life never having tasted this.... magnificence.
Razz: I take it you like it?
*Ranger nods enthusiastically, digging his face into his portion.*
Red: *Too busy texting to spend much time eating.*
Slim: I thought you were hungry?
Red: Gotta ask about some favors I’m owed…

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I already gave Edge the talk about premature planning. Don’t make me give one to you.
Red: Relax. I got this.
Razz: At least get Axe and Trap’s greenhouse funded first while you plan to invade a universe. Hell, maybe some of the more violent or work geared bitties could help with it.
Slim: What?
Razz: Edge is on a crusade.
Tart: ..... this isn't as good as a burrito.
Razz: True.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Last I checked, Axe and Trap’s greenhouse project was being mainly funded by Tale and Swap. They don’t need ta get involved if it ain’t necessary.
Slim: Seriously, what crusade?
Razz: Pretty sure Edge plans on freeing the Bitties and destroying the methods of manufacture so the process can't continue.
Slim: How does he plan on going that?!
Red: By being smart about it. What? Ya think we going in guns blazing? Cut us a little slack why dontcha. We need ta get little ones on the inside, and find a way ta observe the security measures, company protocols.
Slim: Do you really think you could succeed in this? These are humans you want to go against.
Red: My bro and I are talking right now, and we are exploring all options right now, more than just the violent ones.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Hmm....... *Coffee and lasagna don't... really go together, but Razz doesn't give a shit today as… informative as those pamphlets are, remember they are made by the company, not only to inform, but influence. There are biases in those papers..... Slim, I’ll leave it up to you if you want to give the code up, but I won't until I see the plans they make. I've crushed enough rebellion to test how easy it would be.
Slim: Oh.
Red: Yeah yeah razz. Have a lil faith.
Razz: I do in my Queen.
Red: Heh. Suck up. I was never so up my monarch's ass.
Razz: And I care why? Have you asked the bitties their opinion on these plans? As I recall, we tend to give the overall judgement on universes to the local skeletons or judge. Which would be the bitties.

Ranger: Tart, this is great. Why would you rather have a burrito?
Tart: Burritos are superior.
Drawl: I like the white powder topping thing.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Well, what are we waiting for then? Let's ask and see what they think.
Slim: We should probably call up Floof as Dente too later. We should get all of their opinions before moving forward with anything.
Razz: Just start with the ones here.
Slim: Hey guys, mind if we talk to you about something..... It's a bit serious.
Drawl: Looks like you’re in trouble, Tart.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: I STAND BY EVERYTHING I DID.
Slim: What?
Razz: Let's call Blue and see if he knows Kara’s number. Then we can get Dente and Floof on the phone.

***
HomeHawk12
*They end up calling Regalia’s phone since Kara is grounded by Swapgore and had it confiscated.*
Dente: Hello? Friends? Are you there???

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: Dente?
Dente: Ranger!
Slim: Hold on, I can put it on video call.
*Floof is sleeping in the background on Regalia’s lap.*

***
HomeHawk12
Regalia: Oh!! You must be the other Bitties. It is so nice to meet you all.
Drawl: I like talking to her more on video. Less big like this.
Razz: Regardless, we do have an important matter to discuss.

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: It’s like I'm right next to you Drawl! It's almost life size!
Razz: Edge.... where did… he go anyway?
Red: I want to raid the Bittyverse.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Pretty sure he went to speak with your Royals. That or to talk to Alphy’s back home.
Dente: Wait, why would you ever want to go back to that horrible place?! It is much better here!

****
Bookwyrm
Red: Reasons.
Razz: They want to take down the corporation and free all Bitties. I told them they need your permission, as it is your original verse.

***
HomeHawk12
Dente: O-oh my. Are you sure? I-I mean, I know there are other Bitties that could definitely use help. Not to mention, I never told you guys about the illegal Bitty fighting rings....
Floof: Are you trying to convince them to go or turn them away? I’m confused now.

***
Bookwyrm
Dente: Goodness, I don't know! I'm not used to people taking me seriously!
Razz: *Sips more coffee.... on his third cup now.*
Drawl: It is nice.
Floof: Just saying. It's not like we can get the thousands of bitties out of there. At least bitties are international yet.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: .... Boss just texted me. He’s with Orchid right now, and they are talking about a Bitty rights campaign.
Slim: Bitty rights campaign?
Red: Basically, we deploy our computer geek counterparts to find others that disagree with the whole Bitty practice, and we utilise their hacking skills to share your personal stories, perhaps even find more Bitties to interview.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Cool. I'll summon more enthusiasm when the coffee works… wait, he is with the Queen?
Red:Yeah.
Slim: What do you guys think?
Tart: My brother and I haven't been in the system for at least two years minimum. Don't know if I have a good idea of the company.

***
HomeHawk12
Floof: I’m only a few months out of the factory. I could tell ya what I know, though it’s limited to the Taleverse wings.
Dente: You’ve only been out of the factory for about a year, right Ranger? Perhaps you could share your experience in the Fell wings?
Ranger: I-I could try.....
Red: Boss is asking if you guys know of any organisations that support Bitty rights? Do animal rescues accept Bitties?

***
HomeHawk12
Red: And I got a message from Fish.... oh god, I gotta see these.
Razz: See what?
Red: As ya two don’t know, Fish and Chitter have been doing “research” on the potential of ectobodies, and apparently their research was more than just for kinks.
Slim: *Reading over Red’s shoulder.* Apparently they managed to create a flesh-like body that we could use as a disguise. Supposedly we’d be indistinguishable from humans.
Razz: ..... I am not wearing anything from a scientist.

Link to original image.

***

Bookwyrm
(......dude is this. Overtale? A species-swap universe?)

Red: Fish says only female ones are ready though. A single Papyrus and two Sans suits.
Razz: .... do I fucking want to know?

***
HomeHawk12
(That’s a thing? I just happened to be on Pinterest and saw this thing and I thought it would be funny. I know I shouldn’t be surprised lol)

Bookwyrm
(Overtale is a canceled fan game of undertale that had the underground as all humans and frisk as a lil goat kid)
(There's a toooooooon of human Papyrus and Sans)

***
HomeHawk12
(So then.... on a genocide route the bodies would literally just sit there the whole time? It was dark enough without that XP)

Red: Knowing you, probably not. Thoughit would be hilarious.
*Razz’s phone rings. It’s Orchid.*
Razz: *Answers.* Yes my Queen?

***
Bookwyrm
Orchid: Edge showed up to my house to petition me something.
*Razz's face sours.*
Orchid: Is this like Axe’s situation?
Razz: Similar in plight, yet different in nature.
Orchid: I would like to send you to scout it out. You know more about bitties than most, and Edge said there was one extra Sans disguise.
*Razz is not pleased.*
Orchid: And I think you would be very helpful.
Razz: .... yes, my Queen
Red: What she saying?
*Razz is not pleased at all.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Edge got Orchid to abuse her power over Razz without realizing it XD WHOOPS. Shouldn't have told the conniving Fell boy fjfhdj)

***
Bookwyrm
(Razz was trying to be all nice and friendly and keep Edge from being rash and now he is being coerced to wear a disguise..... that Fish already said was female only.)

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Okay, it would be nice if we could tackle multiple facets of this world at once, if possible. Sounds like we have the Shop to investigate, the Production Plant, and what was that illegal thing you talked about Dente?
Dente: Bitty Fighting.
Red: Yeah that. Maybe we could wear hidden cameras, and divide and conquer? Alpha could definitely let's hired as janitors at the very least.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Completely annoyed.* We should test the disguises out at least. I may not like this, but I won't do shoddy work.
Red: Alphys is gonna love this.

***
HomeHawk12
*A few days later, when everyone is off of work and Razz doesn't feel like passing out from exhaustion.*
Fell Alphys: What do you think?
Edge: I look like a cross between Jessica Alba and Cher.
Red: But a convincing cross between Jessic Alba and Cher.
Razz: ....I feel like a walking sack of jello.
Red: At least I let ya take the skinny disguise, less flab that you're not used to.
Razz: THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT BETTER!!!!
Red: If that’s the case you can take the thiccc disguises-
Razz: FUCK OFF RED!!!

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz is having troubles with convincing natural movements. He has a hard time sitting with the extra mass. Edge is not faring so well either. The Science Club ....has a thing for thicc thighs, and all the skeletons have trouble with that. The girls are really excited to help shop for the disguises. Dress up!*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: I have requests for any future disguises that you make, because I swear to Toriel I am going to burn this one!!!!
Barracuda: Don’t. You. Dare.
Edge: I must agree. For one, why are they so thick?!?! I know for a fact that both human males and females come in skinny and lanky varieties!
Fell Alphys: You need to embrace variety.
Razz: AND YOU SHOULD PREPARE TO EMBRACE MY FIST TO YOUR DAMN FACE!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Barracuda: You can't wear armor, so this is the most padding and defense you can bring.
Razz: I doubt that was the inspiration.
Fell Alphys (maybe Alpha?): the thickness will hide any magic glow from you three.
Red: Thicc thighs save lives.

***
HomeHawk12
(Alpha works for me!)

Razz: THAT’S what clothing is for!
Alpha: You’re just complaining about nothing-
Razz: *Right in her face.* If I am forced to wear this humiliating disguise more than once, I will take great pleasure in holding you down and snapping every one of your fingers one at a time, revelling in the screams as your Undyne is unable to help you, because she’ll. Be. Dust.

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .... To be fair she'll die in a cool way. Those death traps were cool from the outside.
Razz: ..... thank you, Edge.
Alpha: ..... ugh............ just how.... complex are those machines?
Red: Like, crazy complex.
...........
Alpha: Do you take commissions?
Razz: I hate all of you.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz:... got it. Intensely hot, near blinding spotlights while trying to find all the key releases to a reverse bear trap, her magic suppressed and arms starting out bound. You will have a front row seat to the resulting carnage..... I wonder if she’ll have any blood left by the time the trap goes off.... or if she will be a shriveled raisin by the end. Would you like me to test that?
Edge: As I said, a cool way to die.
Razz: I will make you wade through more pig shit you beanstalk!

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .... been there done that no thanks.
Alpha: ..... *Writing notes.*
Razz: .... wait a fucking second. Are you giving this out to that damn science club?!?

***
HomeHawk12
Alpha: ...... no?
Razz: *Hand tightens around her throat to choking levels.* FUCK THIS! IF YOU ALL WANT TO HUMILIATE YOURSELVES BY WEARING THESE KINK SUITS, FINE! I WILL JUST GO IN MUSTACHED GLASSES AND A HOOD! NOW HOW DO I GET THIS FUCKING THING OFF?!?!
Barracuda: You are going to damage it like that!
Razz: I DON’T CARE!
SF Alphys: *Walks into the doorway.* Hey babe, I’m stopping at the store. Do you need..... the fuck? ..... Sans?

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: IF THE QUEEN HAD NOT ASKED I WOULD NEVER HAVE SHOWN UP TO THIS KINK SHITSHOW.
Sf Alphys: BWAAHAHAHAAHHA! HOLY SHIT SANS WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!?
Red: These are supposed to disguise us as human. For a universe that doesn't have regular monsters.
SF Alphys: ....are you a sloppy Sans? SANS IS THIS GUY LIKE BLUE AND STRETCH!
Edge: *Loses his grip on laughter.*
Alpha: ..... ah. I h-haven't met you yet, Alphys of Swapfell.......... I think .... Barracuda and I need to introduce you to some people.
Barracuda: Oh! Your nickname could be Gator? Or Croc?

***
HomeHawk12
SF Alphys: Oh, I like Croc. Sounds exotic. What do you think Sloppy Razz~
Razz: .......
Edge: Just my professional opinion, but you need to shut up.
Croc: Awwww, Did I hurt the back alley whore’s feelings?
Razz: ...... SLFMFNDKSLLSKFNFNFJFNFNFK!!!! *Goes completely Tasmanian Devil on the entire costume and suit he’s wearing as Alpha and Barracuda cry out in horror at its destruction. In the end he’s standing bare boned shaking one of the tits in his mouth like a bulldog.*
Red: ..... well shit. Looks like you guys will have to make another one. I guess not even the Queen’s orders can override some level of decency.
Barracuda: MY SUITE IT WAS PERFECT!!!! LET GO YOU BEAST!!!!
Razz: *Spits the thing into her face.* I’LL BE GLAD TO TAKE YOUR FACE INSTEAD!!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Croc: If you liked titty that much Razzy, you should have said something! I got a few cops I could introduce!
Razz: ALPHYS YOU BITCH! *Tackles Croc.*
Barracuda: HEY THOSE ARE MY TITS AND MY GIRLFRIEND!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: DIE YOU INSUFFERABLE GEKO!
Croc: DAMN RAZZY! THIS WHOLE EXPERIENCE HAS YOUR PANTS REALLY FIRED UP DOESN’T IT? *They go rolling and crashing into side tables and chairs, the two punching the living shit out of each other. A tiny head pokes out of Razz’s bag with his actual clothing. A little stowaway that wasn’t supposed to come.*
Ranger: M-Mr. Edge? Red? Why is Razz Sans upset?! What’s happening?!?!
Drawl: Calm down buddy. He’s not supposed to know we came, remember?

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz pins Croc after a long tussle. Both monsters panting.*
Barracuda: .... I might have enough material for a wimpy male. The thickness also made sculpting the body easier!
Croc: Alright. Off you bone bag.

Drawl: .... What's that wiggly thing? It looks comfy.
Ranger: Drawl we shouldn't leave the bag..... oh, he's gone.
*Drawl has found a somewhat damaged but still a comfy jiggly bed.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart is at the apartment keeping Slim distracted with his build so he doesn’t notice the missing ones. Everyone’s in on it djdnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
(Bitty spies. Drawl and Tart are experienced...... also Drawl has decided he likes the new bed.)

***
HomeHawk12
(And Ranger didn’t want to feel left out and the others felt bad... or he accidentally fell into the bag. One or the other.)

Razz: That would be MUCH more preferable!
Croc: Damn Sans, you’re getting way too worked up about this.
Razz: If I told you you would have to fight an army in nothing but a pink ball gown and stilettos, how would you feel about that???
Croc: .... It’s a fair point, but still fuck you.

Ranger: .... Drawl? Where did you go? *Feeling his way around the rim of the bag, not noticing the drop where the zipper is hanging open and falling out.*
Drawl: Darn, I should probably help him.... but this bed though.....

***
HomeHawk12
(So should the skeletons divide and conquer in their scouting mission? Or should they mostly stick together? They should probably have a Bitty with them depending on what they investigate maybe?)

***
Bookwyrm
(Maybe Drawl and Tart for espionage and Ranger for public appearance?)

Drawl: Ranger! This way! You gotta try this!
Ranger: *Follows his voice and gets to the jiggly bed*… this is an odd pillow....

Edge: At least it's something.
Red: Wait, am I going to be expected to wear heels?
Razz: *Gives Red a dirty look. A skin suit is fine, but this guy stop at a measly pair of heels???*

***
HomeHawk12
(That will work. Did we want someone investigating the Bitty shops/Bitty fighting/animal rescues while the others try the production factory?)

Red: Hey! Heels are a bitch ta walk in! I don’t know if you’ve ever tried, but let me tell ya, they are a balancing nightmare.
Edge: ..... I think you're making a big deal out of nothing.

***
Bookwyrm
(Yeah. But not at the same time, not enough man power)

*Edge and Razz both have a bit of heel to their boots, not a lot but.... more than Red can handle.*

*Drawl is sleeping while hugging the jiggle bed.
Ranger: this has such a weird shape.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Where shall we have them start? Maybe seeing if they can get employed through Alpha being a hacker?)

Alpha: W-we could have you go with the middle aged lady look. It might be best for your first mission anyway.

Ranger: Who makes beds this round anyway?
Drawl: .....zzzzz.... gotta get one a’ these for the nest.....

***
Bookwyrm
(Sure we can have Red and Edge have to use womanly wiles or something.)

Red: Can’t I just be a normal woman? Normal women wear flats too.
Razz: Sure, whatever. Let's get this fitting done already.
Barracuda: *Points to Razz.* Strip.
Razz: *Void sockets.* W h a t.
Barracuda: I need measurements. Since I can't just adjust an already made suit.

*Ranger is very comfortable on this bed. It has a weird round tag or protrusion on part of it, but it doesn't really bother Ranger or Drawl.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Pffft! Edge gets put in a more secretary/paper pushing position and gets harassed around the office portion of the plant, and Red is all over the researchers djdnfk)

Razz: ...... *Takes off the shredded remnant of what was left of the original suit he had destroyed. Now he was down to his boxers.* This is as far as I’m going fish bitch.
Barracuda: Well, I see these syringe scars didn’t heal at all really.
Razz: One more word about anything on me will be met with your eye being gouged out.

*Red gets distracted while The others are figuring out Edge’s outfit. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots two tiny figures resting among an assortment of different sized breasts onthe side table.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge in a short pencil skirt, Red in a dress~.... Red is a stereotype nerd outfit in accounting to get records. Razz totally getting hit on.)

Razz: You will match the burly Undynes.
Barracuda: Yeah yeah.
Edge: … What does she have to do with your scars? Did you fight?

Red: You lucky little bastards, those boobs look so damn comfy....... wait how did you...
*Drawl and Ranger have tiny little snores.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Razz is gonna be so out of sorts and floundering like a fish fjdjdj XD Red gets a position as a new researcher/lab technician in those smexy library glasses and lab coat. This is a several week operation if need be.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Razz fills the cute nerd that powerful bizniz wemon need to torment)

***
HomeHawk12
(Oof, poor boy needs to catch up on sexual harassment laws fifjjfdj)

Razz: Well, not her specifically on my- FUCK OFF EDGE!
Edge: Where did that come from?! I just asked a simple question!
Barracuda: Don’t tell me your sensitive about it~
Croc: Seriously babe, leave him alone.
Red: Hey Razz, why’d ya bring the little tykes?

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: What?!? I didn't- ..... Drawl! Ranger!
*Bitties wake up.*
Drawl: .... dang it.
Edge: ... why can't I ask about why you won't talk about the scars Barracuda gave you?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: It wasn’t her- I mean- GAHHH! *Stomps over to the bitties.*
Barracuda: *Whispers to Edge.* Techniqually, I wasn’t responsible for.... 98% of Razz’s..... h-his brother is a different story~
Edge: Slim? What about Slim? Hey! Stop walking away from me!

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: Why won't anyone tell me a full answer?
Croc: *Grins at Edge and follows her girlfriend.*

Red: Yermini munches stowed away.
Razz: You two could have asked! All we are doing is fittings.
Drawl: Can we get one a these for home? I like laying on it.
Razz: We are not bringing home fake breasts for you to lounge on.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: Pleeeeeeeeeease?????
Ranger: I...... I actually like it too.... It's a nice bed......
Razz: .... *Stomps over to a thigh remnant of what he tore up. It’s unrecognizable as a body part. You can use this instead. Same material.
Drawl: But it’s not as round-
Razz: Same. Material.

Private Chat:
-Edgelord: Slim, I have questions and I don’t know if you can answer.
-SlimJim: .... I guess that depends on what you would like to know.
-Edgelord: What does Barracuda have to do with your and Razz’s scars? She was making confusing comments and Razz was getting defensive.

***
Bookwyrm
PM:
-SlimJim: ...
-Edgelord: Slim?
-SlimJim: You know how Red helped with your creation because he was the assistant and subject? You were weapons, right?
-Edgelord: Yes?
-SlimJim: Razz and I were more like soldiers. With different end goals? .... Undyne was added to the project as a researcher in the last years Raz was in major testing and most of my testing.
Edgelord: Oh
SlimJim: That’s a short explanation.

Razz: I am not allowing fake breasts in my apartment.
Drawl: *Squishes the fake breast.* It’s comfy.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: C-could I add this to my soft things nest?
Razz: Putting it on my bed is even worse!
Ranger: Awwww. Okay.
Drawl: But in the dollhouse you don’t have to look at it.
Alpha: W-what is going on over here? *Sees tiny skeletons.* Oh my, you are extremely tiny aren’t you.....
Drawl: I wanna take one of these for my nest, but Razz says he doesn’t allow these in his house.
Razz: I don’t allow fake breasts in my house!

***
HomeHawk12
PM:
-Edgelord: I noticed he’s more scared then my Sans. In the science experiment area I mean.
-SlimJim: You had Gaster as your scientist, and he died in a core accident, right?
-Edgelord: Also correct.
-SlimJim: We had Dr. Gearson. The guy is still alive actually. Our experiments didn’t have an earlier ending date like yours. It stopped after Gearson retired, and Razz managed to force the paperwork through in getting me out of the labs.
-Edgelord:......

***
Bookwyrm
*Edge looks at Razz, who is keeping distance from Barracuda.*

PM:
-Edgelord: Is that why he really hates that she needs to take measurements after the skin suit was killed in his wrath?
-SlimJim: Probably. That and she is known for her very intense experiments.

Red: Boobs are great pillows.
Razz: Not in my house.
Red: If ya can convince the fish and lizards, I’ll take a few home if ya ever stay at my house a bit.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: Yes please! Can we Alpha?
Alpha: As long as you are taking the A or B cups. We don’t use those as much.
Razz: If they make it into a shape that isn’t a boob, I will allow it.
Alpha: O-oh yes, that is something I can do.
Drawl: You are a real doll.
Alpha: Come on Red, let’s get your costume figured out.

***
Bookwyrm
*Red is in a tight dress. Cherry red.*
*Edge has a prim pencil skirt, and fitted shirt.* *Razz is in a ....nerd like clothes.*
Alpha: ..... Someone send Chitter pictures.
Drawl: You look good, Razz!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: .... anything is better then whatever the hell they had me in for that lady costume.
Barracuda: I’m still going to make you pay for that!
Alpha: And..... c-congratulations. All three of you now work at the Bitty factory.

Chapter Text

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Chapter Text

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Woo. Hoo.
Red:........ Did you really choose red because I'm Red.
Croc: Looks hot.
Red: I'm not supposed to be flashy for spy work.

Razz's Apartment:
Tart: Sim, you are my crane! Now lift! I need that to be on top of the inner walls!

***
HomeHawk12
Red: ... I honestly think that green dress would be less-
Barracuda: NO! YOU ARE KEEPING THIS ONE!
Drawl: Well, I for one, am excited to get started. How many wires do I get to chew through? I wanna flash drive with all the viruses on it.

Razz’s Apartment:
Slim: The others have been really quiet. Maybe one of us should check-
Tart: NO TIME! If you move now you ruin everything!

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: I wanna be the best cowboy spy out there.
Red: Damn, okay.
Edge: .... Why doesn't this secretary outfit have pockets? Wouldn’t that be useful in the position?

Razz's place:
Tart: HOLD THE BEAST DOWN.
Slim: *Pets Lord Hater.*

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: Not even that, but what if I need a USB on me? Or how is my recording equipment going to be hidden?
Barracuda: ...... I’ll see if I can cut some areas for it into the flesh suit.
Ranger: Razz? Can I go with you?
Razz: It’s probably best if you stay here. I don’t want you to get hurt. It may be best if Floof partners with me instead.

Razz’s Place:
Tart: NOW THROW THE BEAST INTO THE JAIL CELL!!!
*Slim coaxes Lord Hater into the coliseum arena style dungeon, Tart closing the drop door behind her.* SUCCESS!!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Mission:
Ranger: ...oh....
Razz: I do think you can work with the Queen to write down first hand accounts of what's happened to you. You don't have to.

Razz place:
*LH bats at some of the supports on the arena.*
Tart: THE BEAST IS BREAKING OUT.

***
HomeHawk12
Mission:
Red: .... Well, ya will be working in the record keeping area. He could make a good distraction. Ladies love little disabled guys. Axe can attest to that.
Ranger: *Getting hopeful.*

Razz’s Place:
LH: *Sees a passage deeper into the castle. She is too big, but that doesn’t stop her from trying to squeeze through.*
Tart: SHIT I FORGOT THE BARS!!! GET BACK! BACK AWAY YOU SAVAGE!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Mission:
Razz: Don’t remind me that Axe has a ticket to the Queen’s hearts...... Ranger can come as long as he isn't in the line of fire if this goes wrong.

(I totally plan for at least one human fawning over nerd Razz and his Bitty that he dotes on.)

Razz's place:
*Tart is trapped between legos and LH now. Nowhere to run. He must defeat the beast.*

***
HomeHawk12
Mission:
(I totally want to see flirting with the aces here, where it’s gonna be most awkward sgbjtddhjk)

Ranger: D-don’t worry Razz Sans! I promise I will be a great distraction if needed!
Razz: Hopefully not.
Alpha: You all got your vacation days squared away, y-yes? Because you start Monday.
Barracuda: Ohhhh! I have the idea for the perfect computer virus! It’s gonna show porn on all their company website pages, and give me total control!
Red: As long as ya don’t deploy it immediately. We need evidence for changes in laws, not just to shut them down.

Razz’s Place:
Tart : *Fishes out his lasso of twine.* ALRIGHT YOU BEAST! PREPARE TO BE TAMED BY THE MALEFICENT AND TERRIBLE TART!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .... you got a mission statement and a name for your movement? People Against Bitty Exploitation? Bitty Lives Matter? Bitties for Equality?
Edge: .... why?
Razz: You need to spread information to get a government to change if you don't want to overthrow it.

Razz's Place:
*Slim records Tart at the cat rodeo.*

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: Ah, very true.... we shall start with PABE for a stand in. Unless we happen to discover there is already an existing movement that has a similar goal.
Razz: Very well. That seems fair to me. What do you two think?
Drawl: Lke it. Says it all in four words. Stop treating us like dogs. We can talk back and understand humans just fine.
Ranger: I-I like it too.

***
Bookwyrm
Mission:
Razz: ... I want to at least go over self defense for the Bitties. I want them to be safe.
Drawl: Me and Tart got that covered.

Razz: place:
Slim: .... need help?
Tart: NO!
Slim: Looks like you might.
Tart: I'LL ONLY TAKE A DRINK. I GOT THIS.

***
HomeHawk12
Mission:
Razz: Okay Ranger, you’re the only one I need to teach self defense to.
Ranger: D-Do you think I’d be any good?
Razz: You did a good job of scaring Linda.

Razz’s Place:
*Lord Hater is growling, unable to really turn and bite Tart while her head is still stuck in the hallway.*
Tart: T-this *Huff.* The beast is more difficult than I realized.
Slim: Sure you don’t need help?
Tart: NEVER!

***
Bookwyrm
(I think you meant Ranger there)

Mission:
Razz: Here is a craft knife. It's very sharp. Use stab fleshy monsters and humans. Just try to draw blood. Here, practice stabbing with the chicken I'm cooking tonight.

Razz's place:
LH: *.......... is stuck* ...... MEEEEEEEEOW. MEEOOOOOOOOOOOW.
Slim: ... I think you beat Hater.
Tart: VICTORY. NOW TO TAME AND TEACH TO BE RIDDEN!

***
HomeHawk12
(Yeah, I noticed that last second lmao)

Mission:
Ranger: R-right! I’ll do my best!
Razz: Excellent. I take it we are done here until Monday?
Edge: I believe so.
Red: See ya then. Try not to be late.

Razz’s Place:
Slim: I gotta send this to Sans-
*Razz and the Bitties enter the apartment.*
Slim: Oh good, you should see what Tart was up to while you were gone.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: LET ME UP. *LH is curled around Tart and won't let him up. Kitty says it's sleepy time.*
Slim: We did a lot of work on the... lego thing. And he basically rodeo-ed Hater to submission..... until he released the cat.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: I AM YOUR MASTER NOW, AND I COMMAND YOU TO GET UP!
LH: *Starts licking Tart’s head and purring loudly.*
Tart: I SAID STOP THAT!!!
Razz: ... I’m going to start on dinner.....

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: RAAAAAZZZZZZZZ! THE CAT HAS TRAPPED ME. Raaaaaazzzzzzz!
Razz: I'll help you once I have the beef browning.

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart is imitating Lord Haters distress cry’s and I love it djdbj)

Tart: RAAAAAAZZZZZZZZ!
RAAAAAAZZZZZZZZ! RAAAAAZZZZZZZ!!!
Drawl: Ya know, a little patience never hurt anyone.
Tart: FUCK PATIENCE THIS THINGS BREATH STINKS!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: ........... RAAAAAAAZZZZZZ.
Slim: I’m still here-
Tart: YOU DIDN'T HELP ME WITH THE CAT EARLIER. RAAAAZZZZ!
Razz: Alright alright, I got the food going. What's the big deal?

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: IT'S BREATH STINKS AND IT'S TONGUE IS ROUGH AND IT WON’T STOP LICKING ME AND IT WON’T LISTEN TO EITHER!!!
Razz: She’s a cat. Cats don’t listen to anyone.
Tart: RAAAAAZZZZZZ.
Razz: Go on Hater. Let him go.
LH: *Looks at Razz, proceeding to gently pick Tart up in her mouth and carry the screaming Bitty onto the couch next to Slim so she can keep grooming him.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .......... Lord Hater.
LH: *Purrs as she lovingly grooms Tart.*
Razz: Drawl would you mind helping me save Tart?
Drawl: What’cha need me fer? I guess I can help?
*Razz exchanges Drawl for Tart. LH accepts the trade.*

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Oh god.... I’m contaminated...... and stinky.... *Shudder.* Raaaaazzzzzz!!!!!
Razz: What now?
Tart: Can you run a bath for me?
Drawl: That actually sounds really nice. A warm one would be ideal. Get us ready for the mission.
Ranger: I.... wouldn’t mind a bath.... as long as it’s warm water.....
Razz: ...... Slim, help me out here.

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: Bath time while Sans cooks.
Tart: ... but I like it when Razz does it.......
Slim: I think Sans would be up for cuddles after dinner. He can keep the cat from licking you again.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: .... fine, but I still like how Razz does it more!
Slim: You’ve never had me prep a bath for you before.
Tart: And don’t forget the dash of coconut body wash! That stuff smells amazing. Can I wash my clothes in it too?
Razz: ...... *Trying to focus exclusively on cooking. He really wants to curl up in bed. Ranger was curled into his bandana trying to share his soul energy with Razz.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .... Ranger… you know... that doesn't really work for my soul right?.... it does... feel nice that you would do that for me though. You just soak in the energy you need to keep going.
Ranger: .... Are you sure it doesn't help? Not even a little bit?
Razz: It’s soul warming. I just don't want you passing out from too much leaving you or something. *Finger rubs Ranger.* I don't want you sick.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: I don’t want you to get sick from strain either.
Razz: *Gives him some more good boy pats.* Again, it’s sweet of you, but my soul is.... large enough to sustain itself. Similar to human souls. You just soak up what you need from me.
Ranger: ..... I like sharing with you though....
Tart: Ranger! Come join us! The bath is the perfect temperature!

***
Bookwyrm
(Tart really wants Razz’s attention, huh?)

Razz: Want to stay here or take a bath?
Ranger: ....... I like it right here. I didn't get licked like Tart. *Nuzzles into the bandana.*
Razz: Tart, Ranger said he's good.
Tart: .... but the bath is warm and soapy!

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart is like the attention seeking middle child that just wants dad to praise him.)

Ranger: Maybe later Tart.
Tart: ..... but it will cool off by then! You should come join us now!
Razz: Hey Tart, perhaps you can show Ranger how to use a knife once dinner is ready? He needs to learn self defense, and I know how good you are with knives.

***
Bookwyrm
(Tart may be the one of the oldest, but he wants attention lots!)

Tart: Does he have a blade?
Razz: I got him one, not like your longer blade but a craft knife, longer handle shorter blade, more like a spear or glaive, the blade fragile,
Tart: I'LL DO IT RAZZ!!!!!!

***
HomeHawk12
*After Tart finishes his bath.*
Tart: No no no! Bend your knees a bit to lower your center of balance! Watch me.
Ranger: Uhhhh.....
Tart: Right. Here, I’ll get you positioned properly. *Adjust Ranger manually.*
Ranger: Oh! This does feel more stable.
Tart: Exactly!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Cooking.* Don't stab the cat! That’s what the useless sock filled with other useless socks is for!
Tart: WE AREN'T! THE BEAST IS SAFE FOR NOW!
Ranger: So even though this is a spear, I shouldn't throw it.
Tart: Just stab the sock in its stupid face!

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: *From his hot tub Tupperware.* You're pretty much blind, remember? Yo I don’t want to be separated from your weapon if you can help it.
Tart: Right! Your aim would suck! So stab at the sock until it backs off!
*LH hops onto the table, curious about all the noise.*
Tart: GET AWAY FROM US YOU SAVAGE!
Razz: I said don’t stab the cat!
Tart: I WON’T!

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: I can weave you a strap for it.
Ranger: Lord Hater isn't in the way, right? I don't want to hurt her.
Tart: SHOO CAT!
LH: Meow.
Tart: STOP BACK TALKING ME!

***
HomeHawk12
(Tart will never truly take her and he hates it djfnfk)

Razz: Alright, are you guys ready for a food break?
Tart: Very well, I suppose Ranger is making decent progress.
Ranger: I-I am? *Light blush.*
Drawl: You really gotta learn how to take a compliment buddy.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Slim, could you get the bitty plates and Utensils? I made burrito salad tonight.
Slim: Isn’t that just taco salad?
Razz: No, it’s burrito salad. Drawl, out of the bath, no eating in the tub

***
HomeHawk12

(Couch cuddles fjfjdk)

Link to full sized image!

***
Bookwyrm
(LOOOOOOOK AT THE BOYS LOOOK AT THEM. RAZZ IS SO DONE.)

***
HomeHawk12
(He so is though. Like all he wanted was a nap and he somehow ended up as everyone’s favorite skeleton in the house. He can’t win.)

Drawl: Awwwww..... but the bath is warm, and the air is cold.
Razz: And that’s what the washcloth is for, now get out and bundle up, before Tart eats your portion.
Tart: *Scarfing his down.* I WILL THIS STUFF IS AWESOME!

***
Bookwyrm
(Dammit Razz IS THE ONLY ONE NOT GETTING SLEEP)

***
HomeHawk12
(The sacrifices he must make as the eldest sibling. Truly he is doing the lord's work XP)

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: Kaaay....alright I’m comin'
Tart: *Loving the hell out of his food.*
Razz: Drawl, come on, out.
Drawl: Riiiight...
Razz: Don't make me get you out.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl: Fiiiiine..... *Still hasn’t gotten out. Razz decides to carry Drawl's tub over to the sink, pour it out and plop him on a dry washcloth.*
Drawl: Awwwwww, I was enjoying that bath.
Razz: And now you can enjoy dinner with the others. I need you all energized for the mission.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: Yeah Drawl, we get to be all like secret agents!
Razz: Is that something a secret agent would say?
Tart: No... BUT IT'S COOL.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: That was delicious.... *If he had a belly, it would be bloated.* Just.... one more.... bite....
Drawl: I really don’t think you should-
Tart: Mistake! Urgggggg..... Do you call it a tummy ache when we don’t have stomachs?..... ahhhhh...
Razz: You really made yourself sick? Really???
Tart: RAAAAAAAZZZZZZZZ... make the pain staaaaaaaap~

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Gently puts tart in the bandana.* This is as close as I can do for a magic intake overload.
Tart: *Purrs for the little pats he got*..... it feels a bit better...
Razz: That’s good.
Ranger: Razz? Can I go back in the scarf?

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: It’s my turn in the scarf! You had your turn- Ugggggg.....
Razz: There is plenty of room for both of you. *Picks up Ranger and lets him get situated in the bandanna. He slowly crawls his way over to hug Tart and give him some comforting back pats.*

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: *Grumbled at having to share his spot, it's HIS turn for attention!*
Razz: *Starts cleaning up......*
Drawl: *Asleep at his plate*… zzz…
Razz: .............. *Adds Drawl to the scarf.* Slim? Need anything in the kitchen?

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Nah, I think I’m good for now. I need to call Alpha and touch base with her about your mission. She said I should be on standby for emergency extraction.
Razz: Right. Best to get some sleep then.
Slim: *Cleans up Tart’s soiled clothing and the rest of the bath supplies.* Goodnight bro.
Razz: Goodnight. *The Bitties cuddle up in the fold of his bandanna while he tries to extend his time to let them sleep by wiping the counters and putting dishes away.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Razz has run into a conundrum. He wants to go to bed, but is afraid of waking the Bitties by sliding them into the nest, and he knows Ranger will wake up shouting if he isn’t sleeping in Razz’s room.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz : ........ *Slowly slides into his own bed* ....okay now for the bitties....
*Razz reluctantly unties his bandana and slowly...slowly... moves them to the bear, its snug with all three bitties.*
*Razz can finally go to sleep..*

***
HomeHawk12
.....
.....
*Razz snaps awake, shooting upright and breathing heavy. He had another nightmare.*
Ranger: R-razz Sans?

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: Ranger? You okay?… did I hurt you? At all?
Ranger: No. Was that a nightmare of yours?
Razz: ....yeah.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: W-whaz goin’ on? *Yawn.*
Drawl: *Blinking his sockets open.* Ranger? Somethin’ happen?
Ranger: ..... lay back down Razz Sans.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: .....*slowly lays down.*
Ranger: *Squirming out of the bear nest and to Razz, to give comfort snuggles*.... now you won't get nightmares.
Razz: … Ranger, I don't want you to get hurt...

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: ON THREE! ONE. TWO. THREE! *Drawl and Tart shove the bear so it’s face falls directly into Razz’s socket.*
Tart: There! Now we have a shield to get behind if you flail about again! Problem solved!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Flinches and removes the bear from his socket.* thanks boys. .... can we just sleep now?
*Tart, Drawl and Ranger snuggle up on Razz.*

***
HomeHawk12
*The Bitties are all purring extra hard and rubbing up to him trying to calm Razz’s soul. It’s slowly working. He protectively wraps his arms around them and falls back to sleep.*

***
Bookwyrm
..........
*Slim was going to check on Razz.... but the bitties beat him to it.*
*LH slips into the room.*

***
HomeHawk12
.....
*Slim feels left out, deciding to grab his pillow and set up shop on the floor of the bedroom.*

***
Bookwyrm —
*Razz has to shoo LH off his face, cursing Axe for teaching her bad manners.*

***
HomeHawk12
(She couldn’t find a hole into his skull and it made her upset.)

*Lord Hater decides to sleep on Slim’s chest instead while he’s curled under a blanket on the floor. He didn’t want to force his brother to make room on the bed for fear of hurting the Bitties.*

*Meanwhile, Red happens to find the miniature, functional flying car Edge, Comic and Razz had been working on when the latter was sick. It looks perfectly Bitty sized..... and with a few adjustments could be easily driven.... and flown by the Bitties..... just add some seat belts and other safety features.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Red takes part of the night he usually just lays awake to work on at least giving the model rocket car powered steering and driving capacity. The flight would take much longer but he can only do so much in a night.*

*Razz had been slightly disturbed by Hater's investigations but settled back down without waking. LH settled for the ribcage that DIDN'T have intruders on it. Slim gently holds LH in his sleep.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Morning comes, and everyone meets up in Underfell to prepare for the start of the mission. This is Slim’s first time seeing the disguises. They are.... indescribable.*

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: ..... Why do they look like sitcom stars? And why are Edge and Red women?
Barracuda: They were all women AND PERFECTLY PADDED FOR DEFENSE. before Sans had a tantrum.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: I have my limits, believe it or not. Dressing as a “voluptuous” female was one of them.
Barracuda: That thing took hours to make!
Razz: How many Sanses did you actually expect to wear it?!?!

***
Bookwyrm
Barracuda: there are only 3 Sanses that could get into that one. The smallest 3. Red, Blue and you.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Did you really expect Blue or I to say yes to- HOLD UP THIS WAS PART OF YOUR KINK THING!
Edge: Can we please get going already! This damn suit is itchy.
Red: Speak for yourself. Big tits are heavy.

***
Bookwyrm
Barracuda: Look, it's like food. It COULD be used for kink, but it has other uses too. Skeleton monsters are just very easy models for fake flesh.

***
HomeHawk12
Alpha: G-got it! The program is complete. *Hands the USB to Drawl.* Plug this into any computer and I’ll be able to completely take over their systems.*

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: .... So what plug in does it go to?
Alpha: Looks like this.

Razz: Slimit was awful! The suit was so gross.
Red: .... Did you have to get the lace bra? It does not support well at all.

***
HomeHawk12
Slim: Seriously Undyne, the hell is wrong with you.
Barracuda: I was offering my assistance and he destroyed it!
Slim:..... you knew how it was going to end and you did it anyway.

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro.... can Red throw his voice off enough to sound like Dr. Girlfriend from the Venture Bros? That seems like the most appropriate “fem voice” for him lmao)

***
Bookwyrm
(Oh gosh)

Barracuda: I was thinking of maximum stealth and that a padded female body would work to hide magic, as light armor and for his height!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: You mean maximum humiliation!
Barracuda: Hey! I’ll have you know that humiliation is very sexy.
Razz: I! I-I DON’T...... I’m not even sure how to dissect that statement!

***
Bookwyrm
Croc: *From the corner of the lab, watching anime.* It's super hot with the right timing.
Razz: Ew. Just, just ew.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: Shut up shut up shut up! We are going now and that is final!
Razz: I’m not done-
Edge: FINAL!!!!

***
HomeHawk12
Alpha: E-everyone knows their names and assignments?
Red: Yeah yeah. I’m Diamond Valentine, the newest Lab technician in the Growth and Development wing.
Razz: Why the hell do you have a stripper name???
Red: Alpha was the one that signed us into the system, not me! Have ya even SEEN your badge yet?
Razz: *Takes a closer look at his own.* “Sheldon P. Dankworth”..... REALLY!?!?!
Slim: Pfffft.... Sheldon.
Razz: SHUT UP!

***
Bookwyrm
Barracuda: Get to work Dankworth. You too Jasmina.
Edge: That is a hooker name.
Barracuda: Oh good, then you know how to act.

***
HomeHawk12
(I keep imagining Razz looks like a nerdy super white boy, Red a curvy sassy black woman, and Edge this tall skinny Latina woman with a big perm)

*The three go through the machine, making their way to the factory building.*

Bittyverse:
Razz: The building alone reeks of corporate greed.
Red: Cameras and recorders are functioning. Everyone got their Bitty Buddies?

***
Bookwyrm
*Ranger is with Razz, Tart with Edge and Drawl with Red.... Drawl is already loving those titties.*

Chapter Text

HomeHawk12
*They go through the front entrance, stopping at the secretary. She has a Sansy snoozing on her keyboard dressed in everything pink and a little bow.*
Secretary: Hello, how may I help you?
Razz: Hello Miss, I am..... Sheldon Dankworth, and the three of us are here for orientation. We couldn’t figure out where we were supposed to go, so we came in together.

***
Bookwyrm
*The secretary spends a few minutes looking up information and prints off some directions for the three.*
Secretary: I see you have Bitties, I put down the allowed spaces for Bitties to accompany you at work.
Edge: Thank you.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: So it appears we have orientation together, then we will split off to our departments.
Razz: Right, I forgot about orientations.
Red: Just some videos on sexual harassment and work place safety. We’ll be done with them real quick.
*Three hours after orientation started.*
Red: Ugggggggggg....
Razz: So much for a few “quick” videos.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: ..... Does all that ..... really happen? Why are fleshy people so occupied with other people's flesh?
Razz: .... you can ask an Alphys later.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: What is going on in the Bitty video?
Drawl: Basically stay within a few feet of Razz at all times, preferably on his shoulder or in his pocket. Also, keep the “Owned” tag on at all times. I know they put it between your ulna and radius, but without it they’ll assume ya escaped from the factory section.
Ranger: Ah, got it.

***
Bookwyrm
Ranger: You definitely don't want to be a Fell type and get caught as a runaway. That's a ticket to the research labs.

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Can’t wait to see what the “research labs” is all about.
Instructor: Any questions?
Red: No sir. *In his 20 year female smoker voice.*
Instructor: R-right.... I’ll give you a tour of the building before sending you off to your proper departments.

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz is not thrilled at the looks that the department leader is giving him. Nor the team manager. Edge hasn't noticed the attention he has gotten.*

***
HomeHawk12
*After the tour, Razz gets left to his new department, the manager eyeing him up and down like a piece of meat. Ranger is sitting in the dorky fanny pack on his waist that Fish picked out for the Bitty to ride around in.*
Manager: Hello, you must be Sheldon. My name is Karen. Let me show you around.
Razz: You can..... release my hand at any time you know?
Manger: Come, this way.

***
HomeHawk12

Razz’s disguise XD

***

Bookwyrm
(Oh poor Razzy. That fanny pack has little snacks and pillows for Ranger tho.)
Razz: ....*Is worried that the false flesh won't react to people like real flesh, be warm and fleshy things*....... so what will my main tasks be?

***
Bookwyrm
Manager: you go and do the accounting. The books. You know. *Looks Razz up and down again.*

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
Razz: Understood. Please show me to my desk and I can get started.
Manager: Right this way. *Manager still not releasing Razz’s hand, Ranger sensing his discomfort.*
Ranger: Mr. Sheldon? Can I have- I-I mean I demand some Cheerios! I'm hungry.
Manager: Well look at this little fella! *Releases Razz’s hand to gush over Ranger. Razz is eternally grateful.*

Research Lab:
*Red and Drawl are dropped off in the lab after he is given a lab coat and eye protection.*
Red: Here we go. Stay on guard little buddy.
Drawl: Don’t worry buckaroo. I've got this.
Researcher: Hello there. *Eyes Red’s voluptuous form and black curly hair.* I've heard you are my new assistant.
Red: *Throws his voice off.* That’s right sweet pea, I look forward ta gettin’ ta know the job and all the cute little guys we work with.

(Where is Edge assigned too? Maybe quality control? Or directly cleaning up after the Bitties/disposal of defective ones? Idk if we discussed that.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge was a secretary, to get those sweet legal documents and schedules probably. Dude we are gonna torture these poor guys. The company is full of greedy people.... and not a lot of ... decent ones? So much of humanity's worst power hungry people.)

Account:
Ranger: *Trying his best to be aggressive and assertive.... he used to be better at it.* Mr. Sheldon? You didn't forget them did you? If I wasn't here you wouldn't get any work done!
Manager: Why hello there little Boss, you gonna make sure your sweet lil owner does all his work?
Razz: ...*Is really disgusted by this woman.*

Research:
Researcher: *Is already enamoured with Red.* Oh? T-that's good! I look forward to working y- with you!
Red: Thanks cutie, I hope Drawl here isn't too much of a distraction.
Drawl: *Sitting comfy on Red’s assets.* Hey there.
Researcher: N-nope! He's fine! Completely fine!

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh right! Oh god this is gonna be painfully great dfjgfdhj)

Office:
*Finally, Edge gets dropped off at the company’s Vice President’s office.*
VP: So..... *Eyes him up and down.* You must be my new secretary.
Edge: *Arms crossed, standing to his full height. With the heels he is slightly taller than the VP.* Ah yes, you are my new boss, it’s a... pleasure to meet you.
VP: Let me show you to your desk.
*Tart is hiding in his purse, ready to snarl at the human if he tries getting handsy. He’s seen enough sexual predators to know a creep when he sees one.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge is gonna file so many harassment complaints. He a tall gurl.)

Office:
Tart: ........... I can't believe I'm about to say this. *Moves his way to the top of the purse.*
Tart: Momma? Can I see the desk yet?
Edge: *Almost loses composure.* Y-yes sweety. We'll see it soon.
VP: Wow, I've never seen a Razzberry so well trained.... you must be quite efficient and determined.
Edge: Yes well, I put my full effort into any job I do.
Tart: I want a bean bag so I can help you on the desk!
VP: Almost like a Baby Blue, but even better helper, huh?

***
HomeHawk12
(PFFFFFT!!!! I’m sitting at a laundromat right now and I literally choked on my water at the “Momma” part XD pretty sure the one other lady here is giving me weird looks fjdjdkd)

***
Bookwyrm
(GOOD)

***
HomeHawk12
Office:
Edge: Yes, he.... likes to keep my pens and office material organised.
Tart: Where are the rainbow paper clips? And the stucky tack? I will make Mama’s workspace the cleanest in rainbow order!
VP: He.... he really is sounding a lot like a Baby Blue.....
Tart: *Realising he’s laying it on too strong.* Listen up mister! You better not distract Mama from getting her work done! She is a very busy lady! If you distract her too much I will cut you!
Edge: ..... Tart please, be kind to my. New. Boss.
VP: Don’t worry little man, I’ll be sure your Momma stays..... very busy. *Says it suggestively. Edge is too distracted by Tart’s acting to notice.*
Edge: W-where would you like me to get started?

Research:
Red: Alright sweetie, why don’t you show me what my jobs gonna include.
Researcher: O-of course! Let me first show you each of the Bitty type rooms. We keep each type separated for, well, you’ll learn why soon enough.
Red: Lead the way.
Drawl: *Snuggles between his cleavage like it’s a bed, the Researcher is very jealous.*

***
Bookwyrm
Office:
Tart: *Oh god this is awful. Reminds him why he never tried to return himself to the store.* I will guard the pens! No one will steal them!
VP: First, I want you to get all the passwords and systems memorized. Look over the schedules and past ones to get an idea of what happens here. See me in two hours.

Research:
Researcher: So, um, this way is the Tale line rooms and the specialty testing room. Down that hall is the Fell wing. There's a large room for the Bitties to exercise in and socialize.
Red: Hey, you didn't introduce yourself, sweetie.
Researcher: T-Tony.

***
HomeHawk12
Research:
Red: Tony..... I like the name..... reminds me of, rigatoni~ *Red is playing him like a fiddle.*
Drawl: Hey Ma, I hear crying. *Red listens carefully, able to hear the tiny screams.*
Red: That doesn’t sound good.
Researcher: W-well, we are right next to the Cherry room. We need to keep them in.... special circumstances to mold them into needy, well behaved things.
Red: Mind showing me?

Office:
VP: *Heads into his office. Edge holds the password list in front of his hidden camera for Alpha, logging into the computer and checking out files.*
Edge: Hmmmmmm....
Tart: What?
Edge: They have a blacklist of groups and individuals that actively disagree with their practices.

***
Bookwyrm
Research:
(Yeah Red speak sexy pasta. You would make some Papyrus weak kneed.)

Tony: You won't be working with the Cherries. That's a more advanced and experienced position.
Red: Oh Tony, I just love the Fell lines though. The Cherries are just so sweet.

Office:
Edge: So.... Tart what the heck is with the momma stuff?
Tart: It’s something a "well trained" bitty is supposed to do. I've seen the commercials. And it’s heavily taught to bitties to act like that.

***
HomeHawk12
Research:
(Pasta makes his mouth moist, what else can he say.)

Tony: W-well, I suppose I can give you a quick tour. Be warned, it’s not a nice room. It’s difficult to get the Edgies to behave properly, so it is not uncommon for some to dust in the process.
*Opens the door to the room. It’s darker, and feels far more crushing then the other rooms. The screams of the Bitties automatically increase in volume when they enter.*

***
HomeHawk12
Office:
Edge: That’s disgusting.
Tart: Agreed, which is one of the many reasons I went feral.
Edge: You got the thing?
Tart: *Pulls out Alphys’ flash drive with an evil grin.*

***
Bookwyrm
Research:
*Drawl does not like this room at all. He has seen too many Cherries either in the alleys or get abandoned.*

Office:
Tart: I can't wait to tear this place a new one!
Edge: We have to keep up the act, alright? What ....else is considered good behavior?
Tart: I’m a Fell, so a bit of misbehavior and aggressive possessiveness is acceptable. It's a good sign of an owner if they have a tamed Fell. Any method is acceptable.

***
HomeHawk12
Office.
Edge: Any method? What does that mean?
Tart: Verbal, physical pain, locking us up in timeout for a few minutes. Just make it look convincing. I can take a hit or two.
Edge: *Looking over the tiny, almost striped shirted Bitty*...... I’m not going beyond verbal reprimands. Just.... no.

Research:
*Red’s mouth falls open for a second at the sight. It’s all tiny versions of himself in cages with wire flooring. The ones sharing cages are huddled together crying softly, nothing more but a tiny food dish and a hamster water bottle strapped to the side.*
Tony: Many of the newer ones need a lot of solitary treatment to get them to the proper point where they are considered Cherries. *Reveals solitary confinement cages with no food or water readily available. None of them have clothes, and look like rats in cages. Some of those in solitary snarl at Tony, while others stay in the far corners of their tiny cells.* Have you heard of the term “learned helplessness”? It has proven 70% effective in converting Edgies to Cherries. The other 30%.... Well, you can guess. I am sure.
*Drawl crawls into Red’s crazy hair to hide. He’s noping out of this.*

***
Bookwyrm
Office:
Tart: They will make assumptions with how I act. And I hopefully won't have to do anything that would make you do more ..... extreme measures...
Edge: That’s just.... I don't want to be that harsh anymore.
Tart: ..... at least it's not too normalized for you to call me “baby.”

Research:
Red: ... oh. I understand.
Tony: We don't let new workers be stationed here, it takes a firm hand to work in here. Let me show you to the Baby Blue Room or the other Fell rooms.

Accounting:
Ranger: ..... I think I got a good idea of the desk layout.
Razz: That’s good, their accounting system is nearly as bad as Alphys's was.

***
HomeHawk12
Office:
Edge: ..... let’s take this place down- Wait.
Tart: What?
Edge: They have an entire folder on ”Defective Bitty” reports from customers..... There are dozens of these....
Tart: I-it’s..... It's a lot of personality variations....
Edge:...... They complain when the personalities don't align with the descriptions perfectly...... *Coming very close to shattering the keyboard with his fingers.*

Accounting:
Razz: I can't believe they have a budget specifically dedicated to attacking those that verbalize opposition to Bitty production..... Well, humans suck, so I guess it’s not too surprising. *Carefully puts his flash drive into the computer, implanting Alpha’s virus directly into the accounting computers.*

***
HomeHawk12
Research:
Tony: And here is the Baby Blue Room. I’m sure you’ll be spending plenty of time between here and the Sansies.
BB1: Hello human!
BB2: WELCOME NEW HUMAN!
BB3: CAN I GET A HUG PLEASE?!
Red: They are pretty energetic, aren’t they?
Tony: We make sure all of our Baby Blues are cute, childlike and highly affectionate. As you can see, they are all very well behaved-
BB4: Go away!
*Red looks over to see a little version of Blue, sitting in a corner of the cage and holding a food pellet like it was his greatest treasure.*
Tony: Oh no. We have a defective one.
Red: ..... he just doesn’t wanna share his food. What’s the big deal?
Tony: All are meant to automatically want to share with others. He’s only a month or two from being shipped out too.... I’m sorry you will have to see this on the first day, but it’s a part of the job.

***
Bookwyrm
Research:
Red: Maybe some more training would help?
Tony: It’s not a guarantee, and we have a strict budget for them.
Red: Oh. Would I be in charge of working with the Blues and Sansys then?
Tony: and their Papy line. You might be added to the Fell if you can handle these guys well.

Office:
Tart: Fake it till you make it. If another Bitty didn't tell me and Drawl that, we wouldn't have made it to the shelves.
Edge: ... what?
Tart: Yeah, me and Drawl aren't the perfect Razzberry and SlimJim.

Accounting:
Ranger: Um, Mr. Sheldon? I need a special spot that looks proper or something. That's what, um... a Boss is supposed to demand.

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
Razz: What type of proper spot?
Ranger: I have no idea.... I-I think it needs to be grand or flashy, like I’m the most important thing in the room..... I’ve never actually seen one so I don’t know....
Razz: *Grabs a few boxes of envelopes, the coffee mug one of the ladies gave him for some reason, and some spare fabric from his Fanny pack.* Okay, let’s see if I can get something figured out.

Research:
Tony: Basically, people don’t want to own a Baby Blue that’s greedy and likes to hoard. They get them for a childlike companion that’s sufficient in self care but always wanting to please. In cases like this, it’s easiest to dispose of the Bitty before it causes too much of an issue with the others. *Puts on a thick glove and reaches into the tank, grabbing BB4 around the torso.*
BB4: WHAT ARE YOU DOIN?!?! LET ME GO! YOU CAN’T HAVE SUSAN SHE IS MINE!!! *The other Bitties are calling out in distress/confusion.*
Red: *On edge but trying to hide it.* And what happens to him now?
*Tony takes the Bitty and leads Red out of the room, in an corner area of the lab is a mini freezer. He opens it, the bottom speckled with the remnants of dust piles.*
Tony: The kindest way of dealing with them, and easiest for employees to handle, is to just let them die in a freezer. He’ll be dust within the hour, and the others don’t need to know what happened.
*Puts the screaming, pleading Bitty into the freezer and shuts the door. Drawl has his sockets closed tight and is gripping the wig for dear life. Red feels ill at seeing a striped shirt treated like this.*
Tony: Now, would you like to see our newest line of goat Bitties? We have also been working on flame based Bitties, but have been running into issues with them accidentally lighting things on fire.

Office:
Edge: So they literally murder anyone that doesn’t match with their assigned personality traits? That’s worse than they treat dogs and cats. At least in that case euthanasia is from over abundance and not enough shelter space... they aren’t even doing it to gain strength..... this is just-
Tart: Mama look! I found a purple pen!
*Edge takes the hint, closing out of his files as the VP leaves his office.*
VP: Are you learning the new system okay?

(For some reason I had this mental image of the defective Baby Blue being a hoarder, and literally collects coins and lint and dust bunnies, maybe a stray pill or dried piece of cereal. It’s his nest hoard and no one can touch. Even mice are too scared to try approaching. It’s his.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Gonna be very sparse, cleaning the house)

Accounting:
*Ranger now has a coffee mug throne. That is super soft. He loves it even though he isn't comfortable being on display, but that's what a Boss is supposed to do.*

Research:
Red: Oh, I don't do well with furry pets. Maybe it's best I start with the skeletons and then move up?
Tony: That sounds reasonable.
Red: *Whispers to Drawl*.…think you can hide that guy if we bust him out?

Office:
Edge: Yes, it seems pretty straightforward.
Tart: I know it too! I won't let her forget! Not like the keys! I always make sure we have the car keys!
VP: That’s great, can you schedule a lunch meeting with the department heads in 2 weeks?

(Poor buddy blue just wanted his own things)

***
HomeHawk12
(It happens. Clean up before visitors is a part of Christmas at this point imao)

Accounting:
Lady 1: Oh my! Look at your adorable Boss! He’s so well behaved!
Lady 2: Hey little guy! Wanna meet my Cherry? He’s a bit shy. *She points to the nervous Bitty on her shoulder clutching her hair that Ranger can’t even locate.*
Ranger: D-do not disturb me humans! I must make sure my human does his work!
Razz: He’s.... very straightforward. Not one for making small talk.

Research:
Drawl: *Whispers.* If you can get your purse in an easy to reach spot, then yes.
Red: *Nods, remembering his purse is in the main lab still. He might need to make a.... bleeding out excuse? That’s what human women do, right? Bleed to death from their baby holes several times a year? What is it called?*
Tony: Come with me and I’ll show you the equipment we use for checking Bitty health.

Office:
Edge: Right away sir.
VP: Very good. I’m heading out for lunch. Care to join me? *Edge caught the suggestiveness this time.*

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
Lady 2: Oh isn't that precious. So cute. Here, Maraschino. You make friends while I get a drink from the machine. *The Cherry gets dropped next to Ranger.*
Maraschino: Um, o-okay... I'll wait for you. Um. Oh gosh.

Research:
(Red nooooooo. Oh god that's hilarious.)

Red: I just realized I left my purse, mind if we swing by so I can get it?
Tony : The health rooms are near that. We can do that.

Office:
Edge: I want to make sure I have all the files here to my standards. And I should probably make sure I know the company numbers as well.

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
Maraschino: *Crossing his arms trying to comfort himself, looking up at Ranger and flinching.*
Ranger: H-hello there Mar- I mean Runt.
Maraschino: EEP!
Razz: Are you doing okay there?
Maraschino: P-please don’t hurt me. I promise I’ll be good.

Research:
*Red quickly puts his purse over his shoulder when they enter the room. It’s already been almost ten minutes and he is worried.*
Tony: These here are the scales. We keep weight measurements of the Bitties throughout development. They are extremely light, so these are calibrated every three months to make sure they are still accurate.
Red: I see. That’s doable. *Still can’t think of the right word.*

***
HomeHawk12
Office:
VP: It's been a long time since I’ve had such a hard working secretary. I’ll let you get everything mesmerised and settled then.
Edge: *Sigh of relief.*

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
*Ranger can't really bring himself to be angry and mean to the Cherry. Maraschino just wants his human.*
Razz: ...Maraschino, you want some Cheerios?
Maraschino: S......sure?

Research:
*Drawl is ready to make his move to rescue the Baby Blue. Red just has to make his move first.*
Red: How did you get into this job? You seem like you could get work almost anywhere.

Office:
Tart: ..... I don't like that man.
Edge: Hm? *Hand tart a Bitty Capri Sun, easy drink.*
Tart: He wants to have sex.

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
*Razz gets some Cheerios out of his fanny pack and places them near Maraschino. Hesitantly, the Cherry reaches out and grabs some for himself. Ranger slides off of his cup throne and takes a seat, Razz passing him some Cheerios so he doesn’t have to feel around for them.*
Maraschino: T-these are pretty good.
Ranger: My human gets the honey flavoured ones.
*Maraschino has calmed down with food and safe conversation subjects.*

Research:
Tony: I got this job because I was fascinated by the whole concept of monsters being real. Who would have guessed? A dead civilisation inside Mount Ebott, and the remains of the former inhabitants in neat stacks of dust ready for the picking. Now we create pets out of them, and just the creativity we can have when coming up with fresh varieties. It’s truly going to be a booming field once we start selling them outside the city.
Red: That’s.... really masculine if you.
Tony: Y-you really think so??
Red: Y-yeah.... I just needed to ask real quick, where is the powder room?
Tony: Oh! I can show you myself-
Red: *Purse over his shoulder* No no, it’s better if you just give me directions. *Tony is giving him a weird look.* It’s just.... I gotta..... situation I gotta deal with.... down there. Real messy.

Office:
Edge: *Nearly chokes on his own drink. He wasn’t expecting Tart to be so direct.* Y-yes, well. That isn’t going to happen. He clearly didn’t pay attention to the sexual harassment training videos.

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
Ranger: He has been very good to me considering he is a human.
Maraschino: .... oh. Okay.
Razz: ... I was thinking of adding a few cushions for all the Bitties in accounting to hang out together. What do you think, bean bags or cushions?

Research:
Tony: *Embarrassed.* Oh, um, alright then. I'll meet you in the Fell hallway.
*Drawl makes his move as red gets him close to the room with the freezer. He pries open the freezer to see the Baby Blue curled up in a ball, magic tears frozen to his skull. It's really too bad bitties aren't as resistant as their larger counterparts.*

Office:
Tart: He’s not the one being harassed. You are the one in that position. People don't harass those in a higher position, they do lower positions.
Edge: Well I should be fine.
Tart: You can't summon magic at all. No matter what, okay?

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
Maraschino: S-so..... tiny bean bags? Y-you'd actually get them f-for us?
Razz: If that is what you would like, then of course.
Maraschino: ..... bean bags please.
Razz: How many more Bitties are in accounting anyway? I should know so I can make a count of all the bean bags I’ll need.

Research:
Drawl: Come on buddy, I’m getting you out of here.
BB: ..... w.....w-where?
Drawl: Someplace safe, you just gotta be quiet for the rest of the day once you’re hidden, *alright? Can you stand?
The Baby Blue, still clutching his food pellet for dear life, tries to stand, but instantly falls over rattling. He’s been in there for far too long already. Drawl had to pick him up bridal style and carry him to the freezer door, shortcutting into Red's palm. Red uses a summoned bone to shut the freezer door and retreats to the women's restroom.*

Office:
Edge: You act as if I have no hand to hand training whatsoever. I was Lieutenant in the Royal Guard, you know. I can do more than just magic.
Tart: Just DON’T get fired on the first day. We could be here for a while and we can’t afford losing this position near the top.
Edge: Right right. You have nothing to fear.

***
HomeHawk12
(It took me way too long to remember Maraschino was a type of cherry XP. That's too good I can't.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Yes he's a sweet lil cherry.)

Accounting:
Maraschino: I...I don't know... I try not to go far from momma. Maybe one or two others? There aren't any other Bosses though, so you don't have to fight them.
Ranger: Oh… good. I guess.

Research:
*Red puts the frosty Baby Blue under some room temperature water in the sink.*
Red: C’mon lil bones. You're gonna be okay.

Office:
Tart: I just really don't want to fail.
Edge: I understand.
Tart: You can't blame magic on me because I can't do any.

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
(Razz you fool. Bitty daycare means all them thirsty men and women have an excuse to come to your desk!)

Razz: I'll grab five of them just in case. You are always welcome to hang out with Ranger and I whenever you'd like.
Ranger: If you ever want more Cheerios just ask. I make sure my human always carries some.
*Maraschino: Ummmm.... Okay.... T-thank you. Looking at Ranger.* Y-you’re pretty kind for a Boss Bitty...

Research:
*Drawl is standing by the faucet looking at the Baby Blue worriedly.*
BB: *Weak whimper at the water. It's wet, get it away!*
Drawl: He's making noise!
Red: That's it little buddy. Come back to us.
BB: *Weekly feeling for his food pellet, which dissolved in the water while he was unconscious. He can't find it and curls up tighter.*
Red: Hey, did you pack any fabric in the bag?
Drawl: I think Tart did for me, in case I needed a nest.
Red: Pull it out. We gotta bundle the little guy up.

Office:
Edge: You can do impressive flips from high places. I’ve seen it before.
Tart: Yeah, so?
Edge: That’s a form of magic.
Tart: No it's not!
Edge Yes it is, like Drawl teleporting. You should try doing it in an upward direction sometime.

Chapter Text

Bookwyrm
Accounting:
(I know, but Razz can't help but be helpful. He has a job to do!)

Ranger: .....yes well. I used to look over a few Cherries once. You just remind me of them. *Trying to cover up his nice attitude.*
Maraschino: *Perks up at this, if a Boss can handle Cherries it means they are less likely to push him around too badly!*

(Imma say the fire chief forced Razz to take his vacation days, and Edge’s workplace was shocked at his first time using his vacation days.)

Research:
(Poor bitty buddy bones...)

*The Baby Blue is still whimpering as Red wraps the Bitty up, it's quiet enough that it would be muffled by his purse.*
Red: You think you can watch him in the bag till we get done?
Drawl: I can do it.

Office:
Tart: That’s just skill. And I watched a video on that urban jumpy thing once!
Edge: It seems to be very useful.

***
HomeHawk12
(Edge has accumulated so by vacation days he can stay for a few months if necessary. Red just quit his job and doesn't give a shit how long he needs to be here.)

Accounting:
Maraschino: R-really?
Ranger: O-of course! Did you think I was a barbarian? *Needs to still act somewhat Boss-like.*
Maraschino: R-right.... sorry Boss.....
Ranger: Please, call Ranger. I am only this human’s Boss.
Maraschino: Okay. *Stuffs his face when Razz gives him more Cheerios.*

Research:
*Red makes sure the two are securely placed in his purse, heading out into the Fell hallway where Tony is waiting.*
Tony: *Still a bit embarrassed about the whole period thing. Humans get flustered over the weirdest things.* T-there you are. I thought you got lost. Didn't you have a SlimJim with you?
Drawl: *Pokes his head out of the purse.* Hey! I'm trying ta sleep here. Stop needing me.
Red: Ya heard him. Ya know how the lazy types can be.
Tony: Right.... Anyway, now it's time to show you our nursery area.
Red: Nursery area?
Tony: It’s where the freshly made, baby bodied Bitties are kept until they are developed enough for the bigger Bitty rooms.

Office:
Edge:.... Remind me to show you something cool when we get back.
Tart: What?
Edge: Something Rus and I have been known to do every once in a while. Well, he does it far more than me, but still.

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
*Maraschino is relaxed as he waits..... and waits..... did his human forget to pick him up when they went back to work?*
*Razz doesn't know the people well enough to return Maraschino.*

Research:
Tony: Bitties only take a little less than a year to mature, usually 10 to 12 months. We've been looking into if we can speed that up without causing too many side effects. Shortened lifespan isn't the goal.
*There are a few playpens with what seem to be different age groups of different Bitties.*
Tony: We keep them separate by type until about 2 months, then introduce the similar lines together. Later at 5 to 6 months, we let them all interact in a larger pen. If you have any teaching skills, you might be moved to the instructional room.
Red: Instruction?
Tony: They aren't born knowing everything, it just seems like the dust we used has a few core traits, like inclinations and a few motor skills.

Office:
(Omg the spelling error made me think Edge was having a stroke)

Tart: ....you can't be as cool as Razz.
Edge: ..... why not???
Tart: Razz is the coolest besides me.
Edge: ...... *Regrets dealing with other excitable personalities.*

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
Razz: Your human dropped you off almost and hour ago..... I wonder where she went?
Maraschino: *Whimpers. He likes being with Sheldon and Ranger, but he misses him mama.*
Razz: What was your owner's name? Do you know where her desk is located? I can take you to her.
Maraschino: H-her name is Jessica...... Her desk is that way.
Razz: Is it okay if I pick you up? Or you can ride in the fanny pack with Ranger?
Maraschino:..... Fanny pack please.

Research:
Tony: We usually teach them up to the equivalent of a second grade level. They learn to read time, their colors, the basics of survival and a little bit about how to read. It's up to the owners if they want to further their Bitties education.
*The two enter the nursery, seeing many tiny babybones in glass aquariums. There is one other employee in there doing health checks on the babies. Each tank has an older Bitty in there with them, but they are a bit different then Drawl and the others he's met. They are slightly larger, and seemed... Older? It was hard to say.*
Red: What's with the older babysitter ones? They seem a little off from the Bitties I've seen.
Tony: Those are actually Gen 1 Bitties, the first batch of living Bitties we've ever produced. The remaining Gen 1 Bitties are used as parental figures since they actually have complete souls for the babies to feed on.
Red: Wait, they have complete souls? They don't need humans to recharge?
Tony: That was a feature we worked on removing for the second Gen, so they would be more dependent on their owners.

Office:
(Xjdjdjfk when I first saw the spelling error I seriously thought I was having the stroke.)

*Edge can't wait to show this little ass how he can practically walk on air.*

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
*Cherries have a hard time trusting anyone but their owner. Jessica is working on paperwork at her desk.*
Razz: Miss? I think you forgot Maraschino at my desk.
Jessica: I thought he might enjoy his time here with a buddy to talk to. I had some important work to do and didn't need a distraction.

Research:
Tony: Bitties with whole souls can, in extreme cases, summon these tiny dragon skulls. The only ones we have had the mistake of accidentally having a whole soul are the skeletons. There's not a lot of them, but we don't have other facilities needing them either. They seem okay with the Goat Bitties and Grillbitties too.
Red: ..... *can't believe that they purposefully made intelligent beings so dependent. That's worse than even the Gaster he knew would do.*

Office:
Edge: We will see what you say once I show you.
Tart: I’ll probably give you an interesting grade of 7 out of 10.

***
HomeHawk12
(we had two variants of the Baby Blues, right? The childlike ones and the responsible ones?)

(Okay I got to listen to music in the car and had concept for another little bitty friend lol)

Accounting:
Maraschino: D-distraction?* The hurt in his voice was clear for anyone to hear, though Jessica didn't seem to notice.*
Jessica: Do you mind watching him a little longer? I have a phone meeting in four minutes with an important client.
Razz: *Trying to hold back his sudden rage, tightening his hands into fist a few times and breathing deeply.* Sure thing. He can stay at my desk as long as he needs.
Jessica: Thank you so much. Have fun Maraschino!
*Razz turns away and walks back to his desk, Ranger patting a tearful Marachino on the back trying to comfort him. On the way Razz did notice a few more Bitties. A Reaptertale Grim Bitty was snoozing on top of a man's computer, and a Lil Bro was resting on a tiny pet bed in another man’s cubicle.*

Research:
Tony: Right this way and I’ll show you the education center. *The two pass by a tank of adolescent Lil Bros, neither noticing the one watching Red’s purse like he found his ticket out.*

Office:
*Edge removes the flash drive from his computer, just in time for the VP to return with another man This one has a peculiar Bitty riding his shoulder. It is a Boss with small white wings. It looks like a little angel.*

***
Bookwyrm
(yeah the cutsey ones and the ones responsible enough to be more of a support. The Baby Blues and Blueberries.)

Accounting:
(Not gonna lie, pet beds like those giant pillows are great to cuddle pets on.)

*Maraschino is not okay, he is very heartbroken. he can't help being needy..... he can't help being a bit clingy....*
Razz: .... I got some trail mix with dried fruit too.
*Maraschino is too crushed to answer.*

Research:
(BB gonna get a Lil Bro?)
Red: I think working with the young ones wouldn't be too bad, lil rascals.
Tony: They are very fragile, you would have to be very careful.

Office:
Edge: ....*Stares at the Bitty*...
VP: Ah, Jasmina, this is the head of our Experimental Division, Jason Bowell. He has one of the custom Bitties that we plan to launch orders for next year.
*Tart is hiding lil giggles.*

***
HomeHawk12
(I thought Lil Bro, but honestly I am open to whatever type makes the escape. They just have to love singing their lungs out and driving the whole house insane fjfd if you prefer another type to escape I can switch the Lil Bro out.)

Accounting:
*Maraschino curls up in Razz’s fanny pack to cry, Razz unsure what to do other than let him get it all out.*
Ranger: I-It’s okay..... Umm mm, you are always welcome to hang out with me. I..... Don't think you’re a distraction.

Office:
*Edge only just met this guy and he wants to rip out his throat.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Nah, a Lil Bro that is lazy UNTIL HE HEARS THAT MUSIC PLAYING AND WANTS TO SING HIS LITTLE SOUL PIECE OUT! OMG IS THAT HAMILTON?!? ..... Edge now knows what hell is, and it is showtunes on repeat, damn BB for learning how to work the bluetooth speakers and stealing Red’s phone. BB and the Lil Bro are not like Blue and Stretch.)

Accounting:
*Maraschino is curled himself into a ball.*
Ranger: If you keep it quiet..... I’m not a ... regular Boss... I don't... I’m not good at being pushy... I like cuddles.
Maraschino: ......really? .....*Shuffles closer.*
Ranger: *Reaches for the Cherry.*

Office:
Bowell: Hello Miss Jasmina, *winning smile.*
*Edge hates his assignment.*

***
HomeHawk12
Accounting:
*The fanny pack has turned into a loud purring session, the Bitties comforting each other. Razz has to zip up the pack just to hide the noise they are making.*

Research:
*Drawl is in the purse stroking an unconscious BB’s head holding him close, only for a very young Lil Bro to teleport onto the brim of the purse and shimmy inside without anyone noticing, other than Drawl, as he landed right on top of him.*
Drawl: Hey! What the hell are you-
Lil Bro: Shhhhhh! I found my ticket out of here, don't try to stop- wait, where’s your gown? Are you owned-
Drawl: Shush! If both of us keep talking we’ll get caught, the little guy won't survive another freezer trip.

(The only thing to make this better would be an Edgy. I always write them as little Tasmanian devils and proud little shits fjfjfkd)

Office:
*Edge forces a smile, trying to stay in character. He promised Tart no magic.*
Edge: It is certainly nice to meet you.
VP: See? I told you she is great with Bitties. Her Raspberry hasn't even postured up once since you entered, especially with the other Fell Bitty.

***
Bookwyrm
Accounting:
*Razz gets some work done. Actual work. Boring Accounting..... he does enjoy the Bitties being all happy snuggles in the pack.*

Research:
*The Lil Bro is.... just about adolescent. A good inch and a half shorter than Drawl, he's not full grown.*
Lil Bro: ..... What's with him?
Drawl: Me and my human are keeping him from a freezer trip. Now quiet!

(Ngl, I think Red would have all the karma for an Edgy. Maybe later? And Edge is the one to pick him up. Red can't have all the fun picking up stowaways.)

Office:
Tart: Ony because I know momma won't even think of another Bitty! I'm all she needs!
Bowell: That’s impressive. Fells are notorious.

***
HomeHawk12
(Yes, Edge can find the little ankle biter, maybe Bowell brings in a custom Edgy as a gift or something stupid trying to get in Edge’s pants lmao)

Accounting:
*It is approaching the end of his shift, Razz seeing the clock and unzipping the Fanny pack.*
Razz: Alright little guys, I’m pretty sure Jessica will come in a few minutes. Time to get up.

Research:
*The Lil Bro covers his mouth trying to shut up, Drawl going quiet again too.*
Tony: And this is the play area. Lots of adolescent Bitties running around laughing. As long as they are careful with each other they are allowed thirty minutes of this a day.
Red: They certainly sound like they are having a good time.

Office:
Edge: Um, well.... What can I say? With enough determination and disappointment anything is possible. *Hoping this douchebag will leave.*
Bowell: You shouldn’t be so modest. Even the most experienced owners struggle with training Fells. You must have a natural talent for it.

***
Bookwyrm
(Cuz nothing says I wanna fuc like a bitey lil asshole of a mini-skele)

Accounting:
*Maraschino is completely cuddled up to Ranger’s side, snoring away. Razz has to nudge him awake.*
*Jessica walks up to Raz , not even realizing that Maraschino was distraught at her leaving him with Razz.*
Jessica: Sheldon? How was he? I know he can be a handful at times.

Research:
Tony: We had to cut them down to half hour time frames to fit in all the Bitties that use this room. Right now it's group H in the room.
Red: Doen right precious.
*Drawl is .....not sure what to make of the Lil Bro.*

Office:
(Edge omg using disappointment as training. Take the hint, Bowell you douche)

Tart: ........*the Boss is giving him a look over and seems unimpressed..... Tart wants to wipe that look off his face but that's. Not. Behaved.*

***
HomeHawk12
(You see, it will work because he’ll dress it in a diaper and it has little white chicken wings protruding from its back. A tiny little Cupid of love.... and ankle biting XP)

Accounting:
Razz: I nearly forgot he was here. I think he and Ranger are becoming fast friends. They were napping. *Maraschino groggily pops his head out of the tote with a big yawn.*
Jessica: How precious! I might have to let him sit at your desk more often. What do you think, Maraschino? Do you want to hang out with Sheldon and Ranger tomorrow?
Maraschino: Ummmm.... okay.

Research:
*The Lil Bro has scooted to the far corner of the purse, feeling like he was interrupting something. He pulls his knees to his chest and flinches when the purse is swung a bit too much.*
Drawl: *Can’t really ask him much until they leave. Hopefully Red’s shift will end soon.*
Tony: And those are all the areas you’ll need to concern yourself with.
Red: Thank ya so much sweet cheeks. It was a very informative walk indeed.

Office:
(Edge: I hope you know how disappointed I am in you. I expected better. *Gives the disappointed dad glare. All shrivel under its power.*)

Edge: *Is praying the clock counts down faster his shift will be over soon dear good get him out of here.*

***
Bookwyrm
(.....cuz nothing says sexy like a pseudo baby in wings. And one that likes to bite and scream)

Accounting:
Razz: .... um. Can you make sure he has a blanket or something? I am bringing a pillow or two tomorrow.

Research:
(Dude. The Lil Bro and Baby Blue’s minds are going to be blown when Red, Razz and Edge tear off their meat suits.)

Tony: You’ll be in the Sansy and Baby Blue rooms to start, probably in the Fell rooms by the end of the month.
Red: Sounds lovely boss.
*Drawl is contemplating life choices. And how a babybones just HAPPENED to hitch a ride.*

Office:
(That's one of the most ....unusual tactics Edge used when helping with recruit training.)

*The two men go into the VP’s office. Tart glaring at the prissy Boss the whole way.*
Tart: ....... I don't like them.
Edge: Shush. Save it for home.

***
HomeHawk12
(We must all be grateful that he didn’t give Edge a Bitty Asgore in a diaper with chicken wings instead djdnfk)

(Honestly autocorrect changed discipline to disappointment idk what the heck happened there)

Accounting:
Jessica: Sure thing! Wow, I’ll have to tell everyone how good you are with Bitties. Maraschino has never warmed up to anyone this quickly before.
Razz: Yes, well.... I’ll be sure my space is more comfortable for him in the future.

Research:
Red: Gotta run sadly, but this was a fantastic first day. *Pushes his cleavage together a bit making Tony sweat.*
Tony: Y-y-yes, it was- IS great to have met you and I-I’ll see you tomorrow!
Red: *Walks to the staircase, picking up the pace when he is out of eyesight and camera view. He has to check in the little tykes.*

Office:
VP: I look forward to working with you in the future.
Edge: .... Likewise.
Tart: Bye Mr. Boss man! Tell that Boss Bitty to jump in a hole! *Waves cutely.*
Edge: ...... they say the darndest things.

***
Bookwyrm
(Oh god no that would be awful for Edge to see the king, because of course the Asgore was of the Fell line, like that. Nothing kills a mood faster.)

Accounting:
Jessica: Aren’t you just the nicest lil go getter, huh?
Razz: *Bitch leave those height comments to yourself.* I try....
Ranger: I make sure he doesn't take more than he can handle!

Research:
*The Lil Bro is startled when Red checks the bag, .... to be fair he hadn't planned much more than this far.*
Red: .... Drawl? How's the blue?
Drawl: .... better than in the freezer. Probably could do with a good soul dose.
Red: .... uh. Whose the lil lil guy?

Office:
VP: Ha! Guess you can't completely keep a Fell from being a Fell, huh?
Edge: Yes well... I’m glad he didn't tell that Bitty to his face.
Tart: No Boss would ever beat me! Not even the tallest Boss could!

(Just so we have it here)
(Momma Red time)

(What sick weak BB snuggled to mamma Red looks like.)

***
HomeHawk12
(My bad, I was looking at the thread so confused where it went before realizing I put it in the wrong one djdnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
(Momma Red gonna show off the skills from when Edge was a babybones. Edge is gonna be so weirded out.)

***
HomeHawk12
(It’s gonna be the most awkward time of his life and he’s just gonna be trying to keep the Lil Bro occupied and ignore the scary nanny Red.)

*Red is just outside of town waiting for the others to meet up with him.*
Drawl: Good question, he just kinda fell on top of my head so I assumed you put him here.
Red:..... I definitely did not.
Lil Bro: .... you aren’t gonna send me back, are you?
Red: Depends. Behave yourself and stay hidden for now. don’t do anything stupid.
Lil Bro: O-okay.
*Razz and Edge finally meet up with him. Took them long enough.*

***
Bookwyrm
....
*Razz is held up because..... Jessica and Carol.... wanted to talk to him. Maraschino was enjoying being with his owner again. Razz was not enjoying the "you're such a cutie" comments.*

***
HomeHawk12
.....
*Edge was held up too, because the VP had to make another offer for dinner..... or some alone time in his office. Edge could feel the man’s eyes burning into his fake hella padded booty.*

Red: What the hell took you two so long?
Razz: .... stupid coworkers.
Edge: ...... womanizing bosses.
Red: ..... whatever, we got a life hanging in the balance and we gotta go now.
Razz: A life?
Red: Coworker said he was defective so stuck him in a freezer ta dust. Drawl got him out, but it really took a toll. *Shows them the little fabric bundle in his purse with a little white head poking out.*
Tart: Drawl! What’s with the striped shirt?! How many Bitties did you two break out?
Drawl: Unless another one decided to hide in Red’s ass or cleavage, just these two.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: Papyrus, stop looking at me like that. No, I didn't hide a Bitty in my tits.
Edge: Well what do we do for them?
Tart: Soul time will help the Baby Blue most. I don't know for the stripes.
Razz: Let’s just get to my house. I have Bitty supplies there. I want to get out of this flab suit.
*Lil Bro is very very confused and trying to make sense of things.*

***
HomeHawk12
(We’re gonna need a name for theLil Bro. I’m thinking something music/musical related.)

*Red teleports them to the machine, the Lil Bro jumping in shock.*
Lil Bro: H-humans can use magic?! Since when can humans use magic?!?!
Red: Sorry buddy, this is gonna get a whole lot weirder very soon. Just try to keep an open mind. *He turns the machine on and steps onto the pad with the others, the group being teleported to Swapfell.*
Razz: Finally we can strip!

***
Bookwyrm
(Theater names? Musical names?)

Lil Bro: What?!?
*..... the Lil Bro is completely terrified once Razz starts taking off the pieces of the flesh suit. It looks like he is filleting himself with the suit removal tool. Slicing the pretty much invisible seams along his limbs.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Hmmmm..... Brio? Alto? Riff? Hamilton? Mozart? Jovi? Reo? Devo?)

Razz: Stars that feels SO much better! .... Who the hell is crying?
*The Lil Bro is backed up as far on the table as he can get, tearing up andrattling in fear. He’s currently convinced he’s going to be stripped at the bones by the Horror film monsters, or he’s somehow entered hell. What the hell was he thinking climbing in that purse?!*

***
HomeHawk12
(I was just thinking of the Lil Bro discovering Edge can play guitar and getting super excited because he wants to sing along to everything..... and Edge pulling up YouTube videos to help the little guy learn how to sing properly fjfndj)

***
Bookwyrm
(Large and Adagio are slow tempos in music. Elvis. Elton. If Edge names him.... Sweeney Todd? )

Razz: .... hey... child? We are.... um....
Red: Nice going Razz. Kid, you ever hear about undercover agents?

***
HomeHawk12
(Elton would be cute not gonna lie. Sweeny is also hilarious, though I feel he’s too innocent to be called Sweeny djdnfk)

Lil Bro: *Trying to wipe back his tears.* N-no? What’s that?
Red: Ah geez.
Drawl: *Pats him on the back trying to be comforting.* Sorry we didn’t explain things ahead of time, but these guys here are actually monsters. They are trying to help us.
Lil Bro: *Sniffle.* M-monsters?
Drawl: Like us, but the original versions instead of the lil old clones that we are.
Tart: We are on a top secret mission, to bring down the abusive Bitty Corp and stop the mistreatment of our kind! They just.... had to look human to get in.
Edge: *Peels off his face.*
Lil Bro: *Hic.* Y-you look like a giant Boss Bitty! And you an Edgy..... and Raspberry?
Drawl: Don’t worry kid, we were confused at first too.
Ranger: *Pokes his head out of the Fanny pack.* Who is there? I don’t recognize the voice.

***
Bookwyrm
(....yeah... but Sweeny is if Edge gets to name him. The guy gave a cat the name doomfanger)

(Dude what if baby Bitties are called “stripes” because of the bits of culture and history from the empty Underground? This leaves room for mistakes.... like misunderstandings of the context of words.)

Tart: A Lil Bro stripe decided to grab a ride on Red. And Red rescued a Baby Blue from the freezer.
Ranger: Oh…. Why is he upset then?
Lil Bro: THEY JUST PEELED OFF THEIR FLESH. I DIDN'T KNOW HUMANS DID THAT.
Red: .... Razz you can explain that one. *Bundles up the Baby Blue.* Tart, he only needs soul time right?
*Tart nods yes.*
Razz: *Has no idea how to explain everything to this child.*

***
HomeHawk12
(..... Okay yes you make a VERY valid point on Edge’s naming skills fgbbfds)

(Actually that's a genius idea! We shall call the youngest little guys stripes from now on.)

***
Bookwyrm
(The funniest thing would be the Lil Bro name becoming Stripes like a nickname that sticks like Buddy or Kid)

HomeHawk12
Razz: Okay..... Do you have a name?
Lil Bro: No. Everyone calls me Lil Bro or a striped one.
Ranger: Stripes is the term used for a baby Bitty.
Razz:.... Right, we can tackle that at a later date. Well striped shirt, humans cannot actually peel their skin off. We are just pretending to be humans.
Lil Bro: Why?
Razz:... As Tart said, we are on a special mission..... Say, would you like to see Tart’s Lego fort?

Edge:.... What are you doing?
Red: *Sitting with his feet propped up on the couch, the Baby Blue now bundled up with a thick plush baby blanket and Red cradling him like a human baby on his chest.*
Red: I’m letting the kid recharge, what does it look like?

(Honestly the nickname idea is so adorable I love it)

***
Bookwyrm
(Like he is officially named Elton Sweeny, Destroyer of Humanity.... but everyone calls him Stripes.)

***
HomeHawk12
(XDDDDD This now means they must have an argument over what they are going to call the little fella, resulting in that mess of a name dlfjf)

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: My fort is heavily trapped and no place for stripes!
Lil Bro: um...
Razz: Surely you are capable enough as a guide to ensure the safety of any stripe in your fortress?
Tart: .....DRAWL! CAN YOU GET THE HONEY BOTTLE I KNOW YOU STILL HAVE HALF OF IT.
Razz: I’ll look to see if we have any extra Papyrus Bitty clothes. That poor quality cotton shorts and shirt is not acceptable. The stripe is all wrong too. Stripes aren't vertical!

Edge: Where did you get the blanket?
Red: I got it when Razz said baby stuff works just as well for Bitties.
Edge: ........
Red: *Tucks the Baby Blue closer* ......what?

(Yes they will. And this name thing will be after they find out about the lil guy's dreams of showtunes)

***
HomeHawk12
Lil Bro: ..... so I’m not allowed inside?
Razz: I am afraid not at the moment, it would seem. I’m sure Tart is going to disarm some of his traps so you can enter.
*Tart is going through his wardrobe, both the stuff bought from the toy store and the Bitty stuff he brought. Turns out all the Papyrus stuff would be too big. He settles on a blue sweater with vertical orange stripes and some Sansy type cargo shorts..... he’d let the kid pick any accessories from his pile.*

Edge: Since when are you so......
Red: So what?
Edge: I don’t know! Gentle? Loving? You look like an experienced parent or something.
Red: I learned a lot over the years.

***
Bookwyrm
*The Lil Bro looks tiny in his ill fitting clothes. He likes the gummies Razz gave him.*
Drawl: Hey, Stripes.... you ever seen a TV? Razz has a cool one and there's some cool movies. *Tart might be a while, he has a lot of traps.*
*Razz collects Lord Hater before she can attempt to eat the lil guys. And puts the cat in his room for a bit.*

Edge: ....it's weird.
Red: It’s not that odd.
Edge: .......

***
HomeHawk12
*The Lil Bro finally finishes going through the accessory pile, finding a military style cap that he really likes. It’s a little big on him, so he has to push it out of his sockets all the time, or let it hang by a string around the neck.*
Lil Bro: Is it like the computers the bad men used all the time?
Drawl: Yes and no. Hold on, let me see if we got any Disney movies still.
*Meanwhile Razz warms up some leftover lasagna Edge brought over for the group.*

Red: You’re acting like a goof right now.
Edge: I am not! You are usually passed out drunk or messily rolling around in kink toys! How the hell did you get good with children?!
BB: *Whimpers in his sleep at the loud noise, clutching at Red’s shirt with his tiny fingers.*
Red: If ya really must know, ya were a really whiny kid.
Edge: I was not!
Red: Pfft. Yeah ya were. Even before we left The Lab.

***
Bookwyrm
*Drawl shows the stripe different movies to choose from. There's a couple to choose from on the shelf. Slim apparently likes Disney. There's frozen, Moana, enchanted.... Slim has a few Bitty friendly movies. The Lil Bro doesn't know what to choose.*
*Razz checks the time...... it's about an hour til slim gets home.*

*Red shushes the Bitty.*
Edge: .....this is weird.
Red: I had a lot of opportunities to work with baby bones. It's the older ones that are harder.
Edge: ...........
Red: Hand me another blanket. I want to make sure he's warm.

***
HomeHawk12
*Lil Bro eventually points at the one in the white case (he isn’t good at reading).*
Drawl: *Teleporting up to Razz’s shoulder.* Mind putting Frozen in? The new guy would like to watch it.
Razz: Right after dinner. The food will be ready in a couple minutes.

Edge: He’s 4 inches tall. Won’t the extra weight crush him or something?
Red: Nah. I’m watching him. He’ll be safe.
Edge: ..... *Storms off to find another blanket, still weirded out by his brother’s behavior.*

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: Okay! The fortress has been cleared of traps! Would you like a tour now?
Razz: Food is finished!
Tart: Never mind! These people make the most amazing burritos!
Lil Bro: What’s a burrito?
Tart: Come with me and find out!

Ranger: Mr. Red? Are you up there? I.... think I see you.... I can’t tell if it’s you though.
*He’s standing on the floor right beside the couch, squinting up at the blobby shape that he thinks is Red.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Sets the Bitties up on the table, serving the lasagna.*
Tart: ..... this isn't a burrito.
Razz: Edge was nice enough to bring this so we wouldn't have to cook after the first day of work.
Tart: It still isn't a burrito.
Lil Bro: … are you sure? It could be one. I wouldn't know.

Red: Hey buddy, what’cha need?
Ranger: Drawl said you.... had a Bitty with you? Can I see?

*Edge grabs a towel, he couldn't find Razz’s blankets (he hasn't been allowed to enter Razz's room yet and he doesn't really want to try Slim’s)

***
HomeHawk12
Lil Bro: THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING THING I’VE EVER TASTED!!!
Razz: Slow down, you’ll make yourself sick if you eat like that.
Lil Bro: I didn’t know anything other than food pellets existed till today..... I am so glad to be here!

Red: Sure thing pal. *Lowers his arm and puts it flat on the ground in front of the Bitty.* Step forward and I’ll give ya a lift up.
*Ranger does as instructed, holding Red’s finger tightly as he brings him up to his chest and sets him next to the sick one. Ranger follows the sound of shallow breathing and feels his head.*
Ranger: Drawl said you saved him from a freezer?
Red: Yeah. I thought for a minute we might have been too late. Thankfully it looks like he’s gonna make it.
Ranger: I.... I see. Thank you.... for saving my fellow defect.
Red: You talk like that’s something I wouldn’t think of doing. Trust me little bud, there’s nothing wrong with either of ya.
Ranger: *Happy and warmed by the comment, crawls under the blanket with the sick Bitty, purring into Red’s chest showing his gratitude.*

*Edge comes back with the towels, seeing the Bitties on Red’s chest are increasing in number. Even Red is on the verge of purring with Ranger.*
Edge: I got you..... towels. I couldn’t find the blankets.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I’ll have something better later. We have to figure out who you are going to live with. You're much too young to be alone… and figure out how much you need to learn. Tart probably can teach you a good bit. Or Drawl...
Lil bro: What could be better than this?
Razz: Hey Red! You want me to bring you a plate?

Red: That’s fine, I'll just wrap the soft blanket round them, then the towel.
Edge: .....
Red: *Hearing Razz bossing.* Can ya tell Razz I got Bitties on me and I'd like some. Maybe let the other Bitties get a good soul session during the movie.

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: .....*Steps into the kitchen.* Red said he’d like a plate brought to him, as he’s got too many “comfy” Bitties on him to move. He also said the others are welcome to join in some soul time.
Lil Bro: You guys sleep in piles too?
Razz: ..... We've been starting to do it more often. I’ll get the movie started.
Lil Bro: I wanna sit on the big Bitty.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: They don't need it like we do, but they have complete souls, so it's like an owner's soul.
Lil bro: I didn't know that was an option!
Tart: ..... so we aren't in… our world anyone. In this world there's only big Bitties like them.
Lil Bro: .... I don't understand.
Tart: .... just treat them like Bitties and they will respond.
Lil bro: Oh. Ok.
Edge: I am not a Bitty.

***
HomeHawk12
*Razz is working on cleaning up. Edge carries the other Bitties out to the couch where Red has already been given a plate of food that he’s sharing with Ranger. He’s also trying to get the Baby Blue to eat a little.*

Red: Come on little bud, just a small bite. It will help ya feel better.
Ranger: Yes, it is quite good. Mr. Edge called it lasagna. It’s much better than the food pellets at the lab.
BB: *Groans and hides his face, going back to sleep immediately. He’s too tired and he just wants soul energy and SLEEP!*

***
Bookwyrm
*BB still hasn't connected the dots and is just tired and everything sucks EXCEPT sleep right now. Slim came home to quite the bone pile.*
Slim: So you guys picked up a..... Baby Blue? And a Lil Bro? Are those the right names?
Drawl: Yup. The Lil Bro isn't full grown. I'd say he's about.... 4 or 5 months.

Ranger: ... is he going to be okay?
Red: Hopefully.
*Edge watches as Red is the chosen Bitty cushion of the night so far.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Though every Bitty is currently sitting on Red, Tart is the only one that hasn’t cuddled under the blankets with the others. He’s close to doing it, but the curiosity over this film is keeping him up.*
Slim: *Has grabbed a plate and is now seated on the floor.* So how’d you end up with the new guys anyway?
Red: Saved the Baby Blue from a freezer when the guy I’m working with decided he’s defective or some bullshit, and the other lil guy hitched a ride in my bag. I was surprised ta see him too.
Lil Bro: So you’re a giant SlimJim?
Stretch: It’s more like the SlimJims were based on me......

*Edge sits on the other end of the couch feeling a bit dejected. Sure he didn’t OFFER for the Bitties to hang out with him, but they hadn’t shown interest either.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Btw what type of outfit do you picture BB in? I need to start drawing him and Stripes doing karaoke fkfdnx)

***
Bookwyrm
*The Bitties are just.... used to cuddle piles and how Bosses work, and there was already a Bitty with blankets on Red. Yeah. It's not because they don't like him. Not that at all. And how is Red so.... patient with the little bones?*

Lil Bro: .... like the originals??? Aren't Bitties made from your dust? That's what the nice teacher lady said.
Slim: ..... um.
Ranger: I think it's like .... they tried to make similar Bitties to them. Not directly related.
Tart: .... I still think they are just large Bitties really.
Slim: ......how about we watch the show?

(I kinda see the lil stripe in an oversized sweatshirt he will eventually grow into. The pants are really baggy too. They don't sell children clothes for Bitties as they don't sell the children and Bitties don't reproduce outside of the facilities. The Baby Blue eventually in a lil scrapper version of Blue’s outfit. The guy gets into everything and has Tart help him make it. BB likes to… explore vents and every corner. He needs to find things for his collections! Tart has to practically beat BB away from Tart’s own stash.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Now all I can picture is BB with tiny safety goggles, overalls and some oversized blue boots, short sleeve shirt likely covered in tiny stars, and a bandana to protect his lil face from dust bunnies. Also has dental floss looped around a tiny belt so he can climb for all the good loot lmao)

*With Edge still sulking, Razz starts the movie. Within the first minute a lot of men start singing in unison about ice. Unfortunately Slim didn’t have the special “visually impaired friendly” edition so Ranger just has the voices and sounds to work from.*
Lil Bro: What is this? It sounds so cool!
Slim: Movie intro scene. They actually make some important points in this song that apply to the plot later.
*The Lil Bro had already crawled out of the cuddle pile and is sitting by Tart, bobbing his head to the music. Sadly it was a short song.*

***
HomeHawk12
(I had to look up some tiny outfits for reference and LOOK AT THEM!!!! Those dolls are 5 inches and the overalls are so cute!)

***

Bookwyrm
(Is that Deku? And I love BB's survival outfit. He is prepared for anything. He does not want a large blade like Tart’s, BB runs not fights. Has a lil fish hook and steals some fishline once he finds some.)

Lil bro: ... Can we see that again?
Red: There’s a whole movie with songs in it.
Lil bro: There’s..... more? Really?
*Razz is not impressed at the movie choice. He thinks Elsa could have easily taken over the queendom and lead the people with an icy gaze.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Yep, someone took the head off a Deku Nendoroid and stuck it on the doll body. BB is always looking for upgrading his equipment, and he and Tart make a great pare, BB is really good at getting into the weird places and Tart as the meat shield)

*By the third song, the Lil Bro is standing up and bouncing a bit, attempting to sing along but not knowing the words.*
Lil Bro: “Love is an open dooooor with you! ......nananana..... Love is an open DOOR!~”
Red: Dang, the squirt is really getting into this.
Lil Bro: *Still trying to sing even after the song ends.*

*Razz is also annoyed at how Elsa, just, ran in FEAR! She literally froze the entire kingdom over! She could have ruled the continent with all the dignitaries there for her coronation! Also Anna leaving the palace without long sleeves was a stupid move and she deserved death.*

(Dude, this just made me realize.... all the boats in the fjord in that film were surrounded by ice several feet thick after Elsa ran and there were all sorts of important people visiting. She was basically holding the world leaders hostage.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Razz is bemoaning the fact Elsa could have established herself as a world power right there. She had all the opportunities!... slim can't help but notice the difference from when slim watched it when Razz was trapped in Birdtale. Razz does not like Anna.... and thinks Hans is too cocky)

Red: You think Stretch was ever that exciting?
Edge: .... I… have no idea.

***
HomeHawk12
(Razz’s favorite character is the reindeer so far, mainly because it’s the only one making sense in this film. Olaf he wants to take a flamethrower to)

Razz: If you want some form of comparison, Slim had his moments when he was younger. You should have seen him the day he found his first spider pet. The kid was giggling and chatting up a storm.
Red: Pfffft. Seriously?
Slim: You sound so shocked.
Red: Your reactions are usually so mellow though.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: That was much later. I'd sometimes find him giggling at 3 am with the thing.
Slim: *A bit embarrassed*..... Sans....
Razz: I don't know why he was giggling. Probably the beast ate something or other.
Red: ..... Slim? No way.
Edge: ...... that's a bit unsettling.
Ranger: .... What else happened?
*Lil Bro is entranced with the movie.*

(Razz would like to see if Olaf reforms in the winter if he melts.)

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: More stories? Oh, I have plenty.
Slim: Sans please-
Razz Don’t “Sans please,” me. I’ve never actually shared stories of you growing up and they seem interested.
Red: Yes please. I would love ta know.
Razz: Let’s see.... he also had a ball that I got from the dump. That was a rare find, and it bounced a lot too. For the longest time he was convinced my room was completely off limits.
Slim: Because it was!
Razz: No, the desk and record player were off limits, which you thankfully stayed away from.
Edge: So what happened?
Razz: Apparently he somehow bounced the ball into my room while I was working, and when I come back he’s sleeping on my bed with his butt in the air. Apparently he was looking for the ball and fell asleep.
Red: Pfffft.
Razz: Funniest part, when I went to check on him he was so freaked out he teleported for the first time dragging me with him..... dropped us five feet in the air in the living room. That fall hurt.
*Let it Go has started playing and the stripe is practically dancing along, Tart unsure what he’s doing.*

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: *Is silent because he doesn't want Red to-*
Red: That reminds me of the one time Edge got his claws stuck in a branch, and couldn't get in the door after pulling the branch off the tree and dragging it back to the house. I found him in the doorway, stuck from trying to force the branch in. The stick was wedged tight in the frame, the little guy defeated and waiting for help.
Edge: *Fuck his life.*

*Tart is just staring at the stripe. Great ..... they got a weird one. Is this a reason stripes aren't allowed out of the labs?*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Mweheheheheh! No way.
Red: It happened, swear on my jacket. I even said “looks like you got into a.... tight spot.” and he started crying. It’s hilarious now, but at the time I did feel bad.
Edge: Bullshit! You were laughing your ass off!
Razz: *Is nearly falling out of his chair from laughter.* S-stars that’s good.

*Tart is still staring at this kid singing his lungs out..... then again, no stripes would “normally” come up with the idea to hitch a ride like this one did without being prompted.....*

***
Bookwyrm
*Tart is beginning to think the stripe is a defect at most or an acceptable variant at least. Maybe they tried for a less lazy Lil Bro?*
Lil Bro: .....can we watch that again?
Drawl: There’s other singing movies.
Ranger: .....*slides over to Razz.... Razz needs cuddle time too.... even if Slim is somewhat leaning on Razz since Razz moved in his seat.*
*Slim is almost draped on his brother's chair.*
Red: He was a doofy kid but he had the most guts of them all.
Razz: Your jokes are shitty, but damn is that funny.
Baby Blue: *shifts slightly awake.* .. l-lan… guage..... shhh....

(If only the Tales saw the Fells now. Those friendship lessons paid off and it's like the Fells are a loose group. At least they know each other well enough to let their guard down a bit and know they would at least somewhat have each other's backs)

Chapter Text

BB and Tart: Partners in Crime…. And Bra Theft

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro, little BB moving in with Edge and Red, only he has this hoarding issue where Edge keeps demanding he clean his nest because Edge is a neat freak, and BB tells him to suck lemons fjfnd.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Lil bb stealing the sock of all the lazy bros. Those are his now.)

***
HomeHawk12 —
(Red storms Edge while he’s cooking, demanding to know where the sock went. Edge is initially pleased that it’s gone, but now concerned Doomfanger ate it, only to find out BB turned it into a sack to hide his hoard. He’s gonna make himself a sock kingdom.)

***
Bookwyrm
(BB -short for Bitty Berry- is now trying to get a sock from every skeleton he knows)

***
HomeHawk12
(The day Red takes him over to visit Sin is the day BB discovers how spacious bras can be, and the goat monsters don’t wear socks he can steal. He wants to try using her bras as parachutes.)

***
Bookwyrm
(BB doesn't give a shit about where those bras have been. He and Tart are going to collect them all and find the best parachute, Tart just doesn't know he has a new best friend.)

***
HomeHawk12
*Sin and Red are in her bedroom ready to get intimate, only to hear something in her underwear drawer. Red opens it, finding two Berry type Bitties crawling around.*
BB: Red! These parachutes are terrible! They all have massive holes in them! All the air will escape!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: HE DRAGGED ME HERE.
BB: You didn't have to come!
Tart: You would have gotten lost!
BB: No I wouldn't!

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Do ya mind?! I was about to get some action-
Sin: Who is in my drawer? Oh my, what are you two doing in there? Don't tell me you have a thing for... larger women.
Red:..... pfffft.

***
Bookwyrm
BB: I couldn't care less, I want the parachutes.
Sin: ..... the what?
BB: Lace isn't a good parachute material.

***
HomeHawk12
Sin: A parachute? Give me half an hour, I'll sew something up for you.

Bookwyrm
*BB is unstoppable now. He and Tart have matching parachutes. And BB… may have pushed Tart off the table to test it out. Maybe.*

***
HomeHawk12
(I love how BB was born with just a little too much Fell in him for even the Fells to predict dkfnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
*Tart squeaked. He squeaked as BB shoved him off. BB loves the chaos. He gets to decide to tame it or revel in it.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Tart gently glided to the ground with his parachute, panting heavily and in shock as BB laughs joyously landing next to him. His laugh sounds far to cheary and innocent for the actions he just took. He sounds like a giggling Blue.*

***
Bookwyrm
*BB is deceptively innocent when it suits himself. He can play the part for a while but isn't satisfied with it. He drags Tart to play with the set of legos BB got from Edge.... he wants to make a diving stand to jump off of with them.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Tart and BB .....really like the Legend of Zelda games and once Halloween comes round they have plans)

***
HomeHawk12
Halloween:
Razz: What is taking those two so long? I thought they wanted to see Dente and Floof again.
Slim: They said something about “plans”, I still have no idea what that means….

~End

Edge and the Goopster

***
HomeHawk12
*Undercover, that head of development guy from work presents a second Bitty to try and woo Edge after the first one didn’t go well. It’s a custom one he calls a Gaster. Edge is about to flip out only to see the tiny blobby thing in his palms.*

Click Here for Adorable Gaster Bitties

***
Bookwyrm
*Jasmina, Edge, has a choice. No Gaster Bitties.... or this adorable lil jelly boy. This one is the first so he has to stay in testing for more baby jelly boys..... Edge kinda wants one tbh.*

***
HomeHawk12
*It’s the UT Jelly Gaster, so he waits for about twenty more to be made before all the data and material to make them mysteriously disappear, followed by all the Bitties ”escaping” never to be seen again. Edge finally has Bitties that are desperate for his attention.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Red is just....weirded out seeing his brother with a bowl of jellies. All the lil wiggles for pets. Those look so damn dangerous.*

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Bro..... Ya realize ya have little..... ”dads” all over ya, right?
Edge: *Is sitting on the sofa with all the jelly little Gasters resting as one unified blob on his chest, Doomfanger at his feet feeling jealous.* Is that a problem, brother?
Red:.......

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: ...there's twenty of them and I love them. They are my cuddle puddles.
Red: ... is this because BB and Stripes don't sleep with you enough? They are scared of fang, Boss.

***
HomeHawk12
(Shit I started dying at ”cuddle puddles” it's too cute XD)

Edge: Doomfanger is perfectly behaved around them!
Red:..... Boss, just seeing him every morning is like encountering a burnt zombie or some shit. He's the ugliest damn cat on earth.
DF: PSK!
Edge: Well they could join the cuddle puddle! It's not that big of a deal! Doomfanger never goes near my goop babies!
Red: They leave a weird residue everywhere, pretty sure it's hard ta get out of fur.

***
Bookwyrm
*There's one cuddle puddle that really likes Doomfanger..... he is almost always covered in hair that Edge has to try to comb out while it wiggles in happiness because the comb feels nice.*

***
HomeHawk12
*The hairy puddle loves getting combed.... Meanwhile it means more baths for Doomfanger and he HATES IT. The goop isn't as easy to get out of fur.*

***
Bookwyrm
*The Catster, the one that loves DF, likes to cling to Doom like a baby opossum. It found the spot Doom can't just lick the Goopster off.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Doomfanger tends to stay high on the tables and furniture when the Catster is in the room. Elton Sweeny doesn't mind him so much since he sounds like a deranged choir when he gets them to sing along (though Edge always breaks his guitar out and has a blast), and BB just wants the things to stay away from his sock stash. He doesn't want stains on his horde.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge is also crazy cat lady Change My Mind)

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro he totally is. If someone gave him an ugly Christmas sweater with cats on it he'd be too happy to act dickish about it.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Dude Edge loves cheesy cat things I bet. Once he really gets through internet shopping that house is going to look insane. And red just unamused at the cat throw blanket with cat coasters and cat rug.)

***
HomeHawk12
(The Undynes and Alphys visit at some point, and instead of the kind of stuff they expected like whips, ball gags and chains, it's all cat stuff, a little safe house for the bitties/BB’s hoard, and a guitar with some cat stickers. Red is just sitting like “yes, this is my life now. Edge refused to buy anything with cat puns.”)

~End

Fell Asgore’s “Little” Problem

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh God....Edge in a Bitty store for supplies, with ALL them Bitties on the shelves.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge's new life goal is to build a Bitty sanctuary, Razz is pressed into part time volunteering by the Queen. She said it's good for Razz. SFGore thinks so too.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro Edge is probably gonna convince Fellgore that putting in leftover gold from the Underground into this project is something Sin finds very sexy and he'd be lining up at the door with funding.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Now if only that rat Red would stop fucking Sin and let him woo her back. Fellgore wants his woman back.)

***
HomeHawk12

(Fellgore also decides to look into viagra and more workouts. He needs to work her both emotionally and physically.)

***
Bookwyrm
(YOU KILLED ME WITH THE VIAGRA HOLY SHIT. FELLGORE TRYING TO COMPETE WITH A YOUNGER SET OF BONES. THAT SASSY FUCKER WITH HIS WOMAN.)

***
HomeHawk12
(He needs horse strength Viagra, the human shit doesn’t do it for him XP)

***
Bookwyrm
(I am scared to even THINK of how he gets a prescription for that.)

***
HomeHawk12
(God now that would be an awkward conversation....)

~End

An Edgy Infiltrates the Bitty Fell House?

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro, I just had this image of Edge, however he finds the Edgy, offers it his hand only for the little shit to bite down full force but he can't feel it through the flesh suit. The bystanders look on horrified while Edge is like “this is fine. He has a firm grip for the trip home. Yep, not going anywhere.”)

***
Bookwyrm
(Edge even gets the Edgy’s respect because he can bite without being punished! Barracuda is gonna have Edge's ass tho. This Edgy just likes to chew on E V E R Y T H I N G.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Is it bad I already got a name in mind for the little Edgy? I love writing Edgys, he’s not even here yet and I’m pumped.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Edgys are great and Red would vibe with the butt munch. I swear if they name an Edgy chomper or bear trap.)

***
HomeHawk12
(I wrote a Bitty fic a while ago and I needed a dead Edgy..... in which he ended up becoming a legend among all other Bitties by chewing a hole through the original Comic’s slipper and never getting caught. And the name of that Bitty was.... Nibbler XP.

Now I just think Nibbler is a hilarious name for an Edgy, like ya bring the little ankle biter home naming him something cute and unsuspecting only to discover he chewed a hole through every damn shoe in the closet.)

***
Bookwyrm
(The Nibbler. Oh god he would chew everything. The house would look baby proofed. And rat infested. The Nibbler constantly taken to health professionals to see if drywall or rubber or whatever isn't going to kill him.)

***
HomeHawk12
(XD Thankfully he doesn’t have a real stomach, so the amount he actually eats is questionable. The owners would literally need, like, a steel box to keep him contained in..... until he discovers teleporting magic.... The Nibbler is legendary after all.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Nibbler being a terror of slippers is hilarious. Maybe leaving out things he can destroy thinking he is being a real pest but is not actually harming useful things.)

***
HomeHawk12
(They literally have to make a scene every time he destroys a decoy object just so he can laugh maniacally and feel good about himself.)

~End

Chapter Text

HomeHawk12
Ranger: Razz Sans? *Makes a grabby motion with his hands.*
Razz: Sure thing Ranger. *Lets Ranger rest on his shoulder between his own head and Slim’s. Edge, once again, feels a bit dejected. All of the other skeletons were getting love from cute tiny Bitties. Why was he left out? Was it because they associated him with Boss Bitties? Perhaps he needed to push himself more into their interactions?*
Lil Bro: Next movie next movie!
Edge: I can get that started! What would you like to watch?
Razz: I have been meaning to ask you Edge, would you mind sharing how you got your eye scar? Of course, I will share my story if you share yours.

(The Tales would be gushing while the Fells are just embarrassed about getting caught being amicable. Now they can never live it down.)

***
Bookwyrm
(I love how Ranger calls Razz. It's cute and precious.)

Tart: Wait... you weren't born with those scars?
Edge: … you were?
Drawl: What could even hurt you big guys???
Tart: Must have been something extremely dangerous.

***
HomeHawk12
(And here I wasn’t giving the Bitties their scars in my art since they never really got hurt..... then again we had them born with a discolored tooth for the gold one so it works out.)

Razz: You could say that again....
Edge: Go back, you were BORN with your scars? How?
Drawl: Same way I was born with a gold colored tooth?
Tart: Now you have me curious! How did you get your scars? Tell us!

(Guess who jjgyytfht)

Click for Bitties Singing Adorably!

***

Bookwyrm
(Omg God BB and Elton Sweeny Destroyer of Humanity.)

Edge: ...
Red: We going with the cool cover story or the real one?
Edge: Cool-
Tart: *Starry-eyed.* REAL ONE!

***
HomeHawk12
(YEESSSSS. Elton Sweeny just being his musical self while BB took the Guitar Hero microphone and claimed it. He licked it so it’s his now lmao)

Edge: ...... Do you mind going first, Razz? *Needs to psych himself up for the real story.*
Razz: Very well. I got my scar the very first day I managed to disarm my Gaster. It was a long training session and I genuinely thought I would lose..... then I noticed an opening. I performed a high risk move that ended poorly for my face, but I beat the bastard.
Ranger: Who’s Gaster?

***
Bookwyrm
(In the future, Edge doesn't know why he got the Birty that licks things to claim them instead of nuzzles and hugs.)

Razz: A bastard and a prick and they better N E V E R make Bitty versions of… also, Papyrus and I’s father.
Drawl: Fathers are the ones that made human children with a mother right?

***
HomeHawk12
(At least he has the singing one that, while annoying, likes to sing along when he plays guitar. The only version of Stretch he doesn’t mind)

Slim: Pretty sure I was never allowed to call him dad.
Razz: True, just another example of what shit he was.
Red: *To the Bitties.* Normally that’s how a human father is defined, but we were all born from test tubes too. Just used his magic to form.
Drawl: ..... and you keep saying you aren’t Bitties why?
Tart: Your turn Edge! Story time!

***
Bookwyrm
(Drawl is just ticking the boxes for the Qualities Of Best Bitties List.)

Edge: ....... I challenged Undyne straight out of stripes.
Red: And?
Edge: ...... fell off her roof trying to get her to take me seriously.
Razz: ..... what's the cover story?

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Got the scar while fighting off three dozen vicious 12 foot tall dog monsters and he came out victorious with the scar to prove it.
Slim: Pfffft!
Edge: Shut up! Why don't you share where your false tooth came from?!?!

***
Bookwyrm
Slim: Um.... *Shrinks a bit under Bitty and skeleton eyes.*
Razz: … isn't that story a bit much? Not very realistic...
Tart: What’s a dog monster?

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Ya ever seen a dog before?
Tart: Yappy rat things that humans pamper?
Red: Yeah, so basically like that, but they are fellow monsters and can talk.
Tart: That is so weird.
Edge: IT IS ABSOLUTELY BELIEVABLE. ONLY SOMEONE AS GREAT AS I COULD TAKE ON SUCH A HOARD OF BEASTS. HOW DARE YOU IMPLY OTHERWISE!
Drawl: So wait, if you weren't born with a golden tooth, why get the real one replaced?
Slim: It.... uhh.... losing the original wasn't actually a choice....

***
Bookwyrm
(Does Slim already have an established tooth story?)

Razz: Not even Greater Dog stands at 12 foot tall, much less the other dogs. People would know that 36 dogs, much less 12 foot tall ones, were gone. It's not realistic enough to believe.
Edge: THEY BELIEVED IT JUST FINE!
Razz: .... at least your battle reputation forced them to not call bullshit.
Drawl: *Actually interested in the story.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Funny enough he does not. Sometime between Razz starting to take him out on missions to the shortcut that introduced them to the multiverse. At one point I considered it something Razz had done, but he already broke Slim’s rubix cube in a rage fit which already felt like plenty. I'll let you decide!)

(You can make it serious or funny)

***
Bookwyrm
(Imma make it just as embarrassing as Edge’s. Because all Papyruses were clumsy kids and that's never gonna change.)

Slim: ..... *Shrinks into his hoodie.*
Razz: I found a small amount of comic pages once in the dump and brought it back. It had a boomerang in it.
Red: ..... Did he-?
Razz: He tried making a bone attack into a b-
Slim: -bonemerang......
Razz: ...... boomerang. It knocked him flat on his back when it came back. The comic pieces didn't show that it came back around.

***
HomeHawk12
(OMG I CAN’T ‘bonemerang’ XDDD there are three of them with surprisingly hilarious origins for their major scars. I feel that I took Razz’s too seriously now fkfndk)

Slim: I-I ran the tooth under cold water and tried to put it back in..... But it didn't work.
Razz: because the bone cracked your face up to your socket. Like seriously, I'm pretty sure you could have easily killed yourself if it had hit you square in the forehead.
Tart: BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! You are all hilarious!

***
Bookwyrm
(Just one more reason Edge is jealous of Razz. The captain position. The ACTUAL cool scar story. The guy's DEATH GAMES! .... at least Edge has his height against the short accomplished skeleton.)

*The high pitched laugh from Tart makes Edge and Red chuckle a bit.*
Slim: ...... it didn't hurt that bad at least.....
Razz: At least it wasn't the fish bitch that knocked it out or something.
Red: What was your cover story fer him? *Slowly patting the Bitty bundle that’s been purring from the two in the towel.*
*the stripes is a bit tired from the dancing and singing.... and moves his way towards Edge.*
Razz: I killed the monster that did it. His dust was added to the replacement tooth as a warning. Short, simple and to the point.
Slim: ...pfft. Nyeh. "To the point"
Razz: *Unamused.*

***
HomeHawk12
Edge: *Hits the play button on the Moana film, flinching when he feels something small grabbing onto his shirt hem. Lil Bro is looking up at him expectantly.*
Edge: U-ummmmm....
Stripes: Can I rest in your scarf? It looks cozy.

***
Bookwyrm
*Stripes has Stretch’s boundaries it seems. Edge carefully puts the stripe in his scarf.*
Edge: … We need a name for you and the Baby Blue.
Stripes: *GOOGLY EYE SOCKETS.* REALLY?!? A NAME!?!
*Razz is holding in chuckles at Edge’s expression from the stripe.*
*The Baby Blue awakens.*

***
HomeHawk12
BB: Urrrrgggggg..... my head.....
Drawl: Hey there little buddy. Ya feeling a little better?
*BB blinks his sockets open, squinting at Drawl.*
BB: W-who are you?
Drawl: Don’t tell me you don't remember me. I helped save your life. You're welcome by the way.
BB:.... W-where's Susan?
Drawl: Who?
BB: M-my.... food pellet, she's mine and you can't have her....
Red: Yeah, sorry pal. ‘Susan’ didn't survive the trip.

***
Bookwyrm
(Imma ‘bout turn up the angst.)

BB: ..... that was the.... last gift I had from..... *Sniff*...... How did she go?
Drawl: We had to warm you up in a sink or you would have dusted. The water got it.
BB: .... oh.... I hope she didn't suffer......
...... *none of the skeletons know how to deal with that. Ranger, still snuggled in by the Baby Blue, purring softly for him.*
Stripe: hey Baby Blue! These big not-human Bitties said they are gonna give us names!

***
HomeHawk12
(Wait, the pellet being a gift?! Now I am intrigued....)

BB: A MOMENT OF SILENCE! Can't I grieve in peace!?
Stripes: But.... names....
BB: I SAID LET ME GRIEVE! *Starts crying into Red’s sweater. He hurts too much.*
Red: Hey pal, we all feel sorry that.... ‘Susan’ didn't make it. *He feels a little bad now that he didn't try wrestling the food pellet away before putting him in the sink.* You guys can start thinking of a name for the lil stripes. Mind if I take a minute with the grieving one in your room Slim?
Slim: Uhhh, go for it.

***
Bookwyrm
(It was his first gift, had it since he was a shy lil 4 month old. A caretaker named Susan gave it to him .... he hasn't seen her since. But she said the pellet would help him be braver.......... up to you what happened to her.)

(.... hopefully BB doesn't join Drawl in the "let's ride the spider club)

Red: .... hey buddy...
*The blue is crying softly.*

Edge: .......Mauler of Men?
Slim: He’s a kid.
Edge: Tiny Terror.

***
HomeHawk12
(Awwwwww!!!! That’s so wholesome I can’t. All I think of is either she was a middle aged woman that died in an accident, or she was starting to treat the Bitties more like people then pets so she was fired...... god I’mma have to think on that.)

(Tart would never forgive BB for going over to the spider side)

BB: *Sniffles after a few minutes of crying.* W-why did she h-h-have to.... *sob.*
Red: ..... Come on now, it’s gonna be okay.
BB: NO! I-it’s gone.... s-s-she’s gone.... *sob.*
Red: *Not sure if he should try giving him some tough love or let him cry it out. He’s just too much of a striped shirt for Red to go full Fell monster on him.*

Edge: Well, how did you name the others?
Razz: Drawl and Tart came with their names, Swap Chara gave Ranger his.
Slim: How about Buddy?
Edge: That’s too common. He needs something strong!
Razz: He’s barely taller than Tart.
Edge: That is why he needs a strong name! To strike fear into his enemies!
Slim: How does the little guy feel about it?

***
Bookwyrm
(Red just can't bring himself to be gruff with stripes. It's just too cruel.)

*Red ends up rubbing down the Bitty’s back.*
Red: Hey buddy bones... it's alright...
Blue: What I am ...*hic.* Gonna do now?
*Red is reminded of another tiny set of bones once cried in his arms.*

Lil Bro: What’s an ene-nemy?
Edge: ..... Bartholomew Bonecrusher.
Razz: .... he likes to sing... how about Elvis, Commander of Music? Or Elton Slayer of Souls?
Edge: ....songs? .... Sweeney Todd? Edward Scissorhands?
Slim: ..... ah.... um....

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Come on Buddy bones, you're away from that place now. You’re safe. I won’t let anything happen to ya.
BB: .... y-you won’t?
Red: Nope. You can take as much time as ya need. I’ll keep ya safe in the meantime.
BB: *Eyelights and sockets doubling in size. He just balls his heart out even louder.*

Slim: Okay, so I have a list going now. It looks like Elton, Slayer of Worlds, Elsa, Sweeney Tod, Jack the King, Death Lord, Disney, Destroyer of Humanity, Broadway, Terminator, and Human Slaughterhouse are the favorites so far.
Razz: What was that musical.... CATS?
Edge: We are not naming him Rumple Teaser! That would just be silly.

***
Bookwyrm
*Red feels like he just made it worse but the lil Baby Blue peeps out thank yous between sobs. Maybe .... he doesn't need the pellet if Red is around?*
*Red keeps petting and slightly rocking the Bitty.*

Razz: So how do we pick?
Edge: Let’s number them and use a RNG to pick from. Let's have 3 numbers picked out.
............
Slim: .... So Elton Sweeny, Destroyer of Humanity?
Elton Sweeny Destroyer of Humanity: It sounds important!
Edge: Alright then, that's your name.
Drawl: .... It's pretty long.
Edge: Nonsense, it is a strong name!

***
HomeHawk12
*After a long cry session, BB finally calms down, running out of energy to keep crying.*
Red: Feel Any better?
BB: A-a little.....
Red: Do you want ta try eating? We have lasagna ta warm up if ya want.
BB: W-what's that?
Red: Oh buddy bones, you're about to find out.

Razz: Okay Elton Sweeney, Destroyer of Humanity. How do you feel about having your new name?
Elton Sweeny: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! This is the best day ever! *Hugs Edge’s jaw in his glee, still standing in his scarf. Edge starts blushing a bit, failing the battle to keep it hidden. As Razz had with Ranger, Edge is about ready to claim this Bitty as his child. He will keep him safe forever.*

***
Bookwyrm
(.... is it bad that now I want BB to stand for Buddy Bones?)

*Red takes the lil blue back through the living room.*
Red: We still got lasagna? The lil guy needs some.... hey stripey, careful up there, you can fall.
Razz: On the counter, Red.
Ranger: *Had cuddled with Razz when Red left with the Baby Blue.* Razz Sans? How does the Baby Blue look?
Razz: Covered in fluffy blankets.

(Bitties are the quickest way to Fell hearts. Look at them be so good and nice)

***
HomeHawk12
(Dude that's precisely where my mind was going!!!!)

*Red sets the blanket bundle on the table, BB peering from his burrito wrap to see the tiny table and chairs. He snuggles his body deeper into the blanket bundle until his new favorite person comes back. Red warms up a bigger portion before looking at the tiny plates that were available.*
Res: Oh boy.... *This is gonna be difficult. Too much work normally. Grabs a fork trying to cut a tiny sliver for the plate.* You’re lucky your cute, Buddy Bones.
Elton Sweeney: Mister giant Edgy! I have a name now! I'm named Elton Sweeney Destroyer of Humanity!
Red: Dang Stripes, that's a mouthful.
Elton Sweeney: Mister Edge and Mister Raspberry and SlimJim helped me pick it.
Red:..... Of course it was Edge’s fault.
Edge: What's THAT supposed to mean?

***
Bookwyrm
Red: *Still preparing the food.* Boss, we got a cat named Doomfanger. And Razz's stray is named Lord Hater.
Edge: And???
Red: There's a pattern here.
*The blue is able to stand on his own but likes it when Red picks him up to sit him at the Bitty table.*
Razz: At this rate I'll need more Bitty chairs.
Edge: Names are important! They need to be strong!

***
HomeHawk12
Red: “Strong” normally doesn’t mean something everyone’s gonna laugh at.
Elton Sweeney: Laugh?
Edge: No one is going to be laughing Sweeney, Red is just being an idiot.
Red: *Rolls his eyelights, finally cutting a small piece for BB, it’s overflowing on the plate but it’s the best he could do. He presents it to BB and moves into filling a tiny cup with a dropper.*
BB: This is “lasagna?”
Red: Yep. Get used to the taste Buddy, Boss cooks it all the time.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: Burritos are still better!
Edge: No. That's incorrect
Razz: I think you're just confused, Edge.
Elton Sweeny: It's really good.
Edge: .... wait.... did you wipe your face with my scarf?
Elton Sweeny: ..... is that not why it's there?
*Edge is reminded that the stripe is still just like Stretch.*
Razz: We can see if the Queen, Blue, or Rus can help watch the Bitties that need to recover while we work tomorrow.
*BB is quietly eating.*

(Blue is going to freak out about the kid Bitty. He is going to think Elton Sweeny Destroyer of Humanity is the cutest lil guy)

***
HomeHawk12
(It's gonna be like having another adolescent Stretch, but mini sized.)

Edge: *Mentally decides he will find a way to break this little Stretch of his bad habits even if it kills him.* No Sweeney, it was a.... gift from years ago, and it is important to me. Please do not use it as a napkin.
Elton Sweeney: Oh... I’m sorry.
Edge: It’s okay, just please don’t do it again.
Elton Sweeney: .... so, should I use your cheek as a napkin instead?

***
Bookwyrm
(And Edge will be so excited..... until Elton hits the lazy age at around the 8 or 9 month mark when Bitty personality starts to really show. Like how BB is showing now.)

*Elton lasagna nuzzles Edge before he can wipe the Bitties face.*
*Razz cackles at the pure innocent face Elton has.*
*Red is softly laughing as he hands BB another slice.*

***
HomeHawk12
(He’s going to be trying to get Elton to fight his natural lazy urges..... he even chooses to play Disney songs over the speakers since Elton can’t help but sing along every time.)

Edge: ..... Slowly. *Gently gives him a few head pats, giving the others silent death glares.*
Red: Ya done eating little Buddy?
BB: Yes, I’m done.
Razz: Don’t just leave his dish on the counter! Wash it off Red!
Red: *Already leaving the kitchen.* Damn, fiiiine. Alright, let me have the plate.
BB: No.
Red: No?
BB: This is my plate now. You can't have it.

***
Bookwyrm
Red: .... Can I wash it so Razz gets the stick out of his pelvis?
BB: No.
Red: Well you heard the skeleton Razz.
Razz: Baby Blue? I will trade this blanket for the plate back.
BB: No.
Red: Can I wipe it down with a towel while you hold it?
BB: ........................... I guess.
Drawl: These big Bitties are safe. They aren't really like owners or humans.
BB: .....
Tart: .... I GUESS I CAN SPARE EVEN MORE OF MY STASH FOR ANOTHER BITTY. MY STASH THAT DRAWL AND I GATHERED. THAT WE ARE SO NICE TO SHARE.
Razz: Thank you for being actually helpful Tart.
*Tart disappears into his fort...... BB's sockets lock onto the magnificent construction...... one day.... that will be his to have and explore.*

***
HomeHawk12
(BB is already such a greedy shit I love it.)

Red: Alright, all wiped off. *BB hugs the plate to himself and hops back into his blanket burrito.*
Tart: WE ARE GETTING A BIGGER STASH NEXT TIME WE GO BACK! *Carries out a tiny pair of overall shorts, a purple shirt and a sky blue bandana.*
Slim: We will need a name for the little blue too.

***
Bookwyrm
(BB drives a hard bargain. Everything is his or will be his.)

Edge: Cutthroat. Or.....
BB: I thought it was Buddy Bones? That's what the edgy kept calling me....
Red: *A bit embarrassed and looks away*... eh, fine by me.
Edge: .... Buddy Bones?

***
HomeHawk12
(He has plans for the future. BIG plans.... of owning the world.)

Edge: You were calling him Buddy Bones? Seriously? Buddy is so cliche of a name.
Red: Shut up. At least it’s not stupid like some names you’ve come up with.
Edge: My suggestions are always impeccable! How dare you!
Slim: Huh, Buddy Bones is kind of a cute name.
Razz: Maybe we can call you BB, as a shortened nickname?
BB: Okay, I don’t mind that.

***
Bookwyrm
BB: … So is this a house?
Red: Yeah, but you and the stripe can live with me and Edge.
BB: … a Lil Bro?
Elton: Wow... I'm gonna live with a Baby Blue?
Razz: ...
Slim: .... we should probably have you report your findings and that we have two new Bitties.... probably shouldn't pick up any more...

***
HomeHawk12
Red: Yeah..... it would probably get suspicious if I gotta take bleeding out the butt breaks every time the guys stick another Bitty in the freezer.
Edge: *Glares at him, on the verge of manifesting eyeballs in his shock.* DA FUCK?!
Razz: On that disgusting note, I will go ahead and report to the Queen. Red, do you mind notifying Alpha?
Red: You’re making me do more work? Off the clock too?
Razz: Red!
Red: Fine, whatever. Here bro, let the stripes and BB bond a bit. Show off his new outfit or whatever. *Passes the blanket wrap to Edge.*

***
Bookwyrm
BB: *Sets his large adorable gaze on Exge.*
Edge: .....
BB: Hello?
Elton: *Still on the scarf.* Hello!
BB: Oh! A Lil Bro?
Elton: You look comfy…*Struggles down to the blanket bundle to snuggle in.*
*Edge is very very happy with the attention, but oh god they are so tiny.*
*Slim takes pictures.*

***
HomeHawk12
(we need to make a shared doc with all the character nicknames lmao)

Edge: *Internally screaming with both joy and terror. The Bitties want to live with him! But they are also tiny and what if he hurts them oh God.... What about Doomfanger hurting them?!*

Graveyard Chat:
-SlimJim: Guys I think the Bitties broke Edge. *Sends pic.*
-InterStretchable: Pfffft. Edgelord’s face.
-Blueberry: Hold on.... Is that a little me?
-SlimJim: Yep. We got a little pre-teen Stretch somehow too. They'll be staying with the Fells.
-Blueberry: I NEED TO MEET THESE BABIES!
-Interstretchable: My bro is currently having a cuteness freak out. Ah shit he's coming towards my room.
.....
-SlimJim: Uh.... Stretch?

***
Bookwyrm
(Blue may be fangirling then dragging Stretch to Swapfell.)

Edge: I need to pick up things once we leave work tomorrow.
Razz: They can stay here until you get your house settled. I think you can ask if Tart made guest rooms or can let them hang out in the cabin.

***
HomeHawk12
(There is a strong possibility that what is happening right now.)

Red: Good news. Alpha already downloaded all of our camera footage, and she and the others are hacking the entire Company's network, carefully so they don't get caught.
Slim: Well that's good at least.
Razz: Mind if they stay in the cabin tonight Tart?
Tart:..... Fine, but all the stuff in there belongs to me!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I think they know that-
BB: ... What about that brick?
Tart: Mine.
BB: Are you sure?
Tart: .... Raz Sans!
Razz: Play nice please.

***
HomeHawk12
BB: *Slowly reaches out to grab the stray brick to add with his plate.*
Tart: NO! *Slaps him.* MINE! ALL THIS STUFF HERE BELONGS TO ME! THE PLATE, OVERALLS, SHIRT AND BANDANA ARE YOURS, EVERYTHING ELSE IN MINE!!!!!
BB:...... Okay..... *Sinks into his blanket burrito to pout, Tart not falling for the cute ploy.*
Edge: I’ll buy you some things all your own after work tomorrow.
BB:..... Pretty things?
Edge: Yes, I will get you pretty things. You just have to behave and leave Tart’s things alone.
BB:..... Okay.

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: .... I know what kind of Baby Blue you are and you don't fool me!
BB: *Innocent look.* What do you mean Tart?
Tart: I'm watching you!
Drawl: Don’t take it too seriously. If you meet a Baby Blue surviving on his own you know he is trouble.
Razz: *Just..... confused.*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz:.... Whatever..... *Gets a text on his phone, Orchid telling him to keep up the good work*.... Dammit, I need sleep. When are you guys leaving anyway?
Edge: What's the hurry?
Razz: It's almost ten at night and we have an early day tomorrow!

***
Bookwyrm
Edge: .... and?
Razz: I am not hosting a sleepover.
BB: OH MY GOD I ONLY HEARD ABOUT THOSE!
Elton: What's a sleepover?

***
HomeHawk12
BB: People that don’t live together sleep over at each other's houses and do activities! We learned about that in class.
Elton: Wowie.... that sounds amazing.
Drawl: Technically you two are already spending the night. With or without the big boys we are having one.
Elton and BB: *Unified excited gasp.*
Edge: *Having too much fun with the Bitties.* Noooooooo. I mean.... it’s so late, would there really be a point in going home now?
Razz: I guess Doomfanger can go hungry then. It’s not like he depends on you or anything.
Edge: Very well..... brother, grab the flesh suits.

***
Bookwyrm
*Red grabs them by the boobs to carry them. Edge is disgusted.*
Razz: .... you have options for beds tonight. Mine if Ranger lets you, Slim’s if he lets you, the couch, or with Tart and Drawl.
Tart: .... I will allow it IF all my stuff STAYS MINE.

***
HomeHawk12
BB: ....... fine..... BUT THIS PLATE IS MINE!
Tart: KEEP THE STUPID PLATE! I’VE SPENT TOO MANY YEARS SURVIVING TO GET WHERE I AM TO LOOSE IT TO A BITTY FRESH OUT OF STRIPES!
BB: YOU ARE JEALOUS OF MY PLATE I KNEW IT!!!!
Razz: ..... Elton?
Elton: Can I sleep with Mister Slim please?
Slim: Sure, just stay up near my pillow. I’m a restless sleeper.
*Bitties continue shouting, loud enough to wake the neighbours.*

***
Bookwyrm
*Razz has to yell back at some neighbors because they were yelling complaints.*
Tart: ...... *Has an idea to pass by Drawl and BB in the morning. Without big Bitty ears.*
*Razz collects blankets for the Lil Bro, to safely sleep next to the closest thing to another Lil Bro in the apartment.*

***
HomeHawk12
*The Bitties snuggle into their respective beds for the evening. Ranger with Razz and Lord Hater, Elton with Slim, and the three stooges together in the little cabin. When morning comes, Tart is finally ready to enact his plan.*

***
Bookwyrm
Tart: BB.
BB: *Messing with a grate*... yeah?
Tart: I have a mission.
BB: ...... I'm listening.
Tart: We can't let the neighbors think they can treat my big Bitties like that. I want to take the place out.
BB: ......
Tart: You can raid their shit.
BB: Language! When do we start?
Tart: Let’s get my brother.

Elton: .... Hey SlimJim?
Drawl: *Showing the Lil Bro the bath and sink adapters for Bitties.* Name’s Drawl, stripey.
Elton: .... do... do you think BB would want me as a brother?
Drawl: There’s a good chance he will accept you. Same Bitty line, similar age, same household. He probably will.
Elton: Really?!?
Ranger: .... is anyone in the bath? I don't want to step on anyone's toes or fingers.

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh god is the bath a Tupperware thing with tiny faucets Red macgyvered together?)

Elton: Uhhhh, we’re right here?
Ranger: Oh! My apologies. Would I be intruding?
Tart: Drawl! BB and I need you right now!
Drawl: Coming! You should clean up kid. Baths feel good with warm water.
Elton: Y-you’re leaving me with the Boss Bitty?!
Drawl: Hey, I’ll have you know Ranger is a very nice guy, plus someone should make sure he doesn’t walk off the counter.
Elton: Wait what?
Drawl: Have fun! *Teleports away.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Red found a water Balloon faucet adapter. One of those novelty ones. Razz leaves a lightweight Tupperware in the sink for the Bitties to safely use.)

Ranger: .... um... it's... okay if you don't want me ... here... I can wait for Tart or Drawl to come... or something.
Elton: ... what?
Ranger: Could you ... just, um...?
Elton: ..... you... aren't gonna yell at me? The stripe Bosses I met were very ... bossy.
Ranger: I… well. I think the hot water is the red marked handle?
Elton: ... okay?… what did .... Drawl mean about walking off the counter?
Ranger: ... I can see colors, but everything is fuzzy. And one socket doesn't work at all. I can kinda see edges? It's hard to tell how far they are sometimes.
Elton: *Realizes this Boss is not loud and brash*.... I can try to help you, but you're a lot taller than me.

***
HomeHawk12
(Okay that’s double adorable.)

Bath Time:
Ranger: Are you able to reach it?
Elton: Barely..... *Able to touch it with the tips of his fingers. Unable to turn the handle.*
Ranger: I can... try to give you a boost? You’ll just need to tell me where to grab. Should I stand here?
Elton: Uhhhh, yeah. That’s a good spot. *Still weirded out, this Boss is asking HIM for directions.*

Mission Impossible:
Drawl: Morning bro, whatcha need?
Tart: The neighbours should not be allowed to treat my big Bitties like they did last night. We are going over there and scouting.
BB: Tart said I can steal their stuff!

(Also, the fact Tart calls them HIS big Bitties is the greatest)

***
Bookwyrm
Bath Time:
*Ranger can reach the lever and Elton pushes the hot water handle enough to move it. The water comes out but not fast, the levers aren't pushed that far. Bitties don't really… have much shame between other Bitties. Humans are different. Ranger is going to have to ask Razz Sans to make the lever a different color.*
Elton: Anything else?
Ranger: Razz Sans said the pump bottle would give soap for us... think you can... um... push it down if I get you up there?

Mission Impossible:
Drawl: .... you sure?
Tart: They probably have a lot of shit.
BB: MAYBE THEY WILL HAVE PAPERCLIPS! I wasn't allowed paperclips....
Tart: .... I don't know if they will have that, but we can look. Brother I need the bag!
BB: Oh? You're brothers?
Drawl: We were in the same store, same owner. ....
Tart: He was the best SlimJim. Of course I'd pick him. Now. Window or door?

***
HomeHawk12
(Edge’s inventions are going to be so convoluted..... at least Elton and BB can see the mechanisms....)

Bath Time:
Ranger: Okay, I have your foot.
Elton: Lift me up on three.
One.
Two.
Three!
*Ranger lifts up, giving Elton enough reach to climb on top of the soap dispenser.*
Elton: Okay, now take three steps to your left.... a half step to the right.... perfect! Now hold your arms out!
Ranger: *Does as instructed. Elton pushes as hard as he can on the dispenser but is having issues.* Maybe try jumping on it?
Elton: Good idea. *Balances on top of the dispenser in all his naked glory.* I’m gonna jump on it.

Mission Impossible:
(Pfffft! Of course paperclips XD Razz will have to bring back a purple one from the office for him skdjdjdk)

Drawl: If we got a window I can teleport us inside.
Tart: Window it is!

Chapter Text

Bookwyrm
(Edge would make unnecessarily complicated elevators and motorized contraptions. Razz would too once. But budget and energy tell him to wait a good while.)

Bath Time:
*The soap dispenses and Ranger barely catches it in a small human medicine cup that is like a bucket to them.*
Ranger: Bath time now... need a hand down?
Elton: I think I can- *Slips and falls, heavily landing but not hurt.* OOF.
Ranger: You okay stripe?
Elton: Great, just let's grab the cloth and get it done.

Mission impossible:
*Tart and Drawl are decked out in their survival packs, just the blade and a few bits or bobs. BB is instantly jealous.*
BB: ..... oh my stars, is that real fishing line?
Tart: Yep! It's good as a tripwire. It doesn't break without sawing with my blade. One reason I choose floss as a rope more often. You can't make an emergency break away with fishing line.
Drawl: Want me to tell the other two what we're doing?
Tart: Just leave a note. They know we are gonna do stuff.
BB: ....... think they have any tacks?
.........
*Ranger can't really read and Elton isn't a strong reader. Maybe 2 grade level?*

***
HomeHawk12
Bath Time:
*The two wash up and relax in the warm water. Ranger closes his eyes and nearly falls asleep. Neither of them are talking much.*
Elton: Sooooo.... do you like movies?
Ranger: I guess? I can’t really see what’s going on, other than the audio.
Elton: Does that mean you like when they...... sing? Like the movies we watched yesterday?
Ranger: They were nice songs. Why do you ask?
Elton: *Getting embarrassed.* Would you mind if I..... sing some of them? *Convinced Ranger will say no.*
Ranger: Right now? You don’t need to ask permission. Sing all you want.
Elton: Really? Yay!

Mission Impossible:
*The three make their way outside. Shimmying along the neighbours window ledge and peering through a crack in the curtains.*
BB: Looks quiet. I don’t see anyone.
Tart: BROTHER! Take us in!
Drawl: *Teleports them just inside the window.*

***
Bookwyrm
(One day Elton will sing like no one can hear for hours. )

Bath Time:
*Elton hums a tune and sings when he knows the words.*
....
....
*This is nice for the bitties. Maybe they can see if they can work the DVD player later?*

Mission Impossible:
Tart: .... the counter will have the best vantage point. From there we can scout the best places to trap and loot.

***
HomeHawk12
(So did the big guys go to work leaving the little ones at home today, or is this before Razz and Slim wake up?)

***
Bookwyrm
(I think just before maybe Razz is in the kitchen with some tea. Or needed to pick something up real fast. Maybe meeting with Barracuda for flesh suit adjustments or attachment.)

***
HomeHawk12
(I’ll assume he made a quick run to Barracuda’s because I’m pretty sure he’d notice when Tart and Drawl and getting backpacks ready lol.)

Bath Time:
*Ranger can’t help but hum along. He starts humming Love is an Open Door, Elton getting really excited and spinning around in the tub trying to dance like they did in the film. He really wants to watch the film a few more times today.*

Mission Impossible:
*The group makes it on top of the counter, BB searching the drawers while Tart is eyeing their surroundings.*
Tart: Okay, I am thinking right between the couch and wall would be a great place for a trip wire...... we can loosen the screw on that shelf so when the human falls into the wall the shelf fails and drops everything on top of them-
BB: Guys! They have tacks! They are silver shiny!!!!
Tart: ... More trap ideas. Very good.

***
Bookwyrm
Bath:
*Once the two are clean and scrubbed off, Elton pulls a fluffy towel over. It's really a washcloth, but it's a large towel to the bitties. Luckily Frozen is still in the player so they only need to work the remotes.*

Mission impossible:
BB: But I want these tacks! I'm not leaving them!
Tart: But we can trap the awful humans!
BB: We’ll do it without my tacks!
Drawl: .... They have some weird decorations here. What's with all the tiny human statues?
*The room has many Precious Moments figurines around. ...... it’s creepy.*

***
HomeHawk12
Now TV Time:
Elton: How do I work a remote?
Ranger: I don’t know. I think it has buttons?
Elton: It does have buttons, but no instructions on what to press..... hey, what’s that on the coffee table? It looks like a note.
Ranger: A note?
Tart: Yeah, I’m not good at reading though. Can you?
Ranger: ...... I’ve never been able to make out a letter before.
Elton: Right, sorry...

Mission Impossible:
Tart: There are a hundred tacks in there! You can spare half of those!
BB: NO I NEED THEM ALL!
Drawl: Hey BB. I’ll give you this in exchange for 30 tacks.
BB: What could possibly be worth- GASP! *Drawl is holding up a shiny, brand new paper clip.*

***
Bookwyrm
TV Time:
*Elton decides to spend the time slowly reading the note. The remotes are on the couch. The gray one is for the DVD player and the black one for the TV.*
......
*Ranger accidentally turns the sound WAY up before un-muting it.*

Mission impossible:
BB: Where did you find that?!?
Drawl: That info is worth ten more tacks.
BB: *Srares at Drawl*..... deal.
*The sounds of LET IT GOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Blasts through the apartment wall. It’s loud enough to shake the counter.*

***
HomeHawk12
TV Time:
*Ranger fumbles all over the remote before accidentally finding the mute button.*
Ranger: Stars that nearly scared me to death.
Elton: “W......wEEEEEEE W-W-wiiiiiiilllllll..... hey Ranger, is this a B or a D?
Ranger: ......
Elton: I’m sorry I keep forgetting.

Mission Impossible:
BB: *Jumps at the noise, a whole bunch of his tacks falling onto the kitchen floor.*
BB: No my tacks!
Neighbor: *From the bedroom.* GOD DAMMIT IT’S THOSE FUCKING MONSTERS AGAIN! I’M DONE YELLING THROUGH THE DAMN WALL! WHERE'S MY BAT?!?!
Tart: ...... hide!

***
Bookwyrm
TV Time:
Ranger: Do you think anyone heard that?
*Muffled angry noises next door.*
Elton: .... what… what now?
Ranger: …. maybe find the others and hide in the cabin or fort?

Mission Impossible:
Neighbor: I'M GONNA SHOW THEM A THING OR TWO!
BB: What do we do???
Tart: Just wait for an opportunity-
*BB drops the entire tack box.*

***
HomeHawk12
TV Time:
*Slim rushes out of his bedroom clearly alarmed.*
Slim: W-what the hell was that? Are we in danger?
Ranger: I-I’m sorry Slim, I-I didn’t know what I was clicking and then the TV got very loud.
Elton: S-someone is shouting a lot next door!
Slim: It’s okay, I’ll handle it.... where are the others?
Elton: Not sure, but we did find this on the coffee table. *Passes Slim the note. He needs to squint to read the tiny writing.*
Slim: ..... well shit.

Mission Impossible:
Tart: Shit! *Neighbour storms into the living room.* Quick! Behind the cereal box! *The group jumps for cover, just in time for the human to storm into the kitchen to grab the baseball bat sitting by the refrigerator.*
Neighbor: This is the last time I- AHHHHHHGGGGHHHHH!!!! *Falls backwards having stepped on four tacks with one foot. Behind him is a table with a lot of display angels.*

***
Bookwyrm
TV time:
Slim: .... This is why I shouldn't sleep so deeply, damn it.
Elton: ...... what's that word mean?
Ranger: It’s a word you say when frustrated or angry. It's a not polite one.

Mission impossible:
Tart: Stay down BB.
BB: Start! My tacks!
Drawl: We can't be caught, kid!
*The table wobbles from the man falling.... then angels descend from above.*

***
HomeHawk12
TV Time:
*The three hear the man screaming, a loud crash, and the braking of several glass objects.*
Elton: .... Damn it.
Slim: .... Razz is gonna kill me.

Mission Impossible:
*The female neighbour rushes out of the bedroom from all the noises, screaming at the sight.*
Neighbor 2: YOU BROKE MY ANGELS!!!!!
Neighbor 1: THERE ARE TACKS IN MY FOOT!!!!!
Neighbor 2: THOSE WERE COLLECTOR EDITIONS YOU IDIOT!!!!
Neighbor 1: I BET YOU SPILLED THE TACKS ON THE FLOOR YOU CRAZY BITCH!!!!
BB: M-my tacks-
Drawl: Quick, while they are busy yelling at each other, we gotta get closer to the window so I can teleport us.
BB: B-but-
Drawl: Just take the damn paper clip and let’s go!

***
Bookwyrm
TV Time:
Elton: .... what?!?
Ranger: It’s an expression.
Elton: What does his face have to do with it?

Mission impossible:
BB: You owe me tacks then!
Tart: Later we can come back!
BB: Start!
Drawl: *Pulls BB.* Nope later.

***
HomeHawk12
TV Time:
(No Elton hasn’t learned sarcasm, or context XD)

Slim: Okay..... I’m not sure how to get the others out of there.....
Ranger: Could we cause a distraction?
Slim: I’m not good with being loud or anything.... Uh, TV volume?
*The Bitties port onto the windowsill, Drawl about collapsing from all the shortcuts with so many passengers. He needs a soul recharge.*

Bookwyrm
Tart: SLIM! SLIMJIM! HUG MY BROTHER! NOW PLEASE?!?
BB: *Messing with his clip, looking at its shine.*
*Slim lifts up a dead on his feet Drawl.*
Slim: … Sans is really gonna kill me.

***
HomeHawk12
Elton: R-Razz Sans is really gonna kill us?! I’m too young to die!
Ranger: Razz Sans isn’t really gonna kill anyone.... he is just going to be very mad-
*The handle on the front door turns, Razz stepping inside with a shipping bag.*
Razz: Stars, the neighbours are fighting already.... alright Ranger, I got some little bean bags for the office. Did you know there is an outdoor game that uses these-
*Pauses at Slim holding a half dead Drawl to his chest, Tart pacing around frantically, and BB clutching his paper clip for dear life just as Razz spots him.*
BB: IT’S MINE YOU CAN’T HAVE IT!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: … .what...
*BB glares as he holds his clip.*
Neighbor: GOD DAMN FUCKING MONSTERS!
Razz: ...
Slim: *Innocent eyesockets.*
Razz: ...
Tart: ...*fidgets*
Ranger: Welcome home Razz Sans?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: *Socket twitching from a barely contained bout of rage. It’s obvious the group had something to do with his enraged racist neighbours. Razz quickly steps back into the hallway to go through his breathing exercises.*
Elton: .... W-was that it? He didn’t kill anyone?
Slim: It’s worse than I thought....

***
Bookwyrm
(..... Blue is begging Stretch to let him be a bitty uncle and let him go to Swapfell right now!)

Slim: Sans is really angry if he walks away for breathing exercises.
Tart: ..... not.... kick us out angry… right Slim?
Slim: *Sees the fear in Tart… in Drawl.... in Ranger… in all of them.* No no, Razz wouldn't do that.

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh no babies, they're getting so scared of being homeless.)

*Everyone flinches when they hear a door slam open, the neighbour having encountered Razz in the hallway and now the two breaking into an incoherent screaming match. All the Bitties latch onto Slim, looking at the door fearfully. Slim isn't sure if he should try intervening or not.*
Razz: GO SUCK A DICK DAVE NOBODY CARES!
*He barges back into the apartment before the human can force the door open, retreating to the kitchen instead where he won't be disturbed by the neighbors.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Babies scared of... returns .... Ranger couldn't take that again...)

Razz aggressively makes coffee- ........ Razz aggressively makes TEA.

Slim: ..... I think .... I should talk to him?
.......
*Slim sets the bitties in a pile on the couch... and goes to his brother.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Oh no Ranger! Good thing Dente isn't here with them....)

Ranger: *Sniffle.* Slim is telling the truth, yes? He's not really going to return us???
*The Bitties all hug and cuddle trying to calm each other's souls. It's all they can do to stay composed at the moment.*

Slim: Hey Sans?
Razz: ..... What. Happened.
Slim: Uhhhhh, you see, the bitties didn't like how the neighbors treated you the other night......
Razz: So they left the dick across the wall with a bloody foot?
Slim:.... They did?- I-I mean, a few of them tried watching Frozen and they didn't know how to work the remote, and I'm pretty sure the volume woke up the neighbors..... Then they ran into the Bitties revenge.
Razz: .......
Slim: Uhhhh, bro?
Razz: .... *Deep inhale and exhale.* I am going to drink my tea, put on the damn flesh suit for the Queen’s mission, then I am going to the Fellverse.
Slim: Could you maybe have a word with the bitties before that? They’re convinced you’re going to kick them out.

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *One… two... three....* I will speak with them.
Slim: .......you okay?
Razz: Just need to confirm some things.
......
*The bitties see a simmering Razz walk out.*
Razz: *Huff* .... did they see you?
Tart: .... n-no...
Razz: So they can't prove you were there?
Drawl: .....
BB: … I'm not giving up my paper clip!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: *In and out. In and out.* I don’t care about the paper clip-
BB: Well you should! It’s a nice paper clip!
Razz: .... I only want to know if they can prove you were there.
Drawl: I-I don’t think so.... W-we only had the chance to look in a few kitchen drawers. We were talking about what ta work on next when the film started playing and we spilled the thumb tacks.
Tarts: .... we got out while they were fighting.....
Ranger: A-are we in trouble? *Sockets starting to prick with tears.*
Razz: ....
Ranger: A-are you..... r-r-returning us?

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: *Breaks a little.* No Ranger, of course not. *Offers his hand*... here humans don't see you as bitties. There's no store to return to. They might not even see you as young monsters but able to be held fully accountable. I can't even guarantee they will understand that you work a bit differently than the large monsters.
Ranger: *Grab’s onto Razz’s hand.*
Razz: You can't attack humans. In any self defense situation you should run. strike if you have to, but run. Here humans are racist. They might still think you're cute like the ones back in your world. But they do not see you as pets.

***
HomeHawk12
Tart: ...... they really don’t see us as pets.....?
Razz: No, you will be treated like any other monster.
Drawl: .......
Tart: *The gravity of the situation is starting to sink in.* I almost ruined everything.....
Razz: ... *Offers his other hand to Tart, he takes it searching for comfort.* The important thing is that you weren’t seen. If you ever pull something like this again, there is a good chance I won’t be able to protect you from any legal repercussions. Please remember that.

***
Bookwyrm
Drawl: ....
Razz: Not only that... but the people here don't know that the skeletons can travel to other worlds. If you do get caught in trouble, don't mention the machine or the other skeletons ever. Only Stretch and Blue have a bit of presence here.
BB: Who are those?
Razz: You can meet them later. But there aren't any bitty laws here. So you will be tried as a monster.

***
HomeHawk12
Drawl:..... My a-apologies Razz Sans.... I-I teleported them in there a..... and I should have known better... *Tries to wipe a few tears from his sockets without the others noticing. Razz does, and it hurts.*
Razz: Come here. *Leans down and let's the other grip onto his chest.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: ... I know you've been treated as less than for most of your lives, but here you aren't pets and you will be held accountable for your actions. Thievery isn't just survival up here, it's an offense. *hugs Drawl to himself.* Some humans just want a reason to fight and you guys wouldn't last long against one.

***
HomeHawk12
Ranger: W-we’ll be good now....
Tart: It.... it won’t happen again.
Razz: Be sure that it doesn’t. We were lucky this time, but that doesn’t mean you’ll get away with it if this happens again.
Drawl: I-It won’t.
BB: Wait! What about my tacks?!
Drawl: The ones currently covered in human blood?
BB: Wait.... that human ruined my tacks!?!?!
Razz: They are NOT your tacks.
BB: But Drawl said we could get them later!
Drawl: That was before the talk BB. I’m not taking anyone back there.

***
Bookwyrm
BB: ...... *Walks off.* I'm raiding the fort.
Tart: YOU GRABBY BITCH!
Razz: *Picks up LH from the top of the couch.* Don’t kill each other. I'm going to be in my room if anyone needs me.
.....
*Ranger follows Razz after a few minutes.*

***
HomeHawk12
*Ranger follows the bright exterior color of the fortress, managing to make it to what he thinks is the hallway, seeing a blurry shape moving into something, followed by a door shutting and stillness.*
Ranger: Razz Sans? *No answer. He makes his way to the wall that he’s pretty sure the door is on, feeling his way down and hopefully somewhere he won’t be stepped on.*

*The horrendous sounds of screaming and fighting draw Slim out from the kitchen, seeing things from inside the fort go flying as BB and Tart duke it out inside the walls. Elton is on the couch nervously watching the battle.
Drawl: *Teleports to Slim’s shoulder.* Razz Sans told us not to kill each other, but that seems really unlikely right now. I can’t stop them.
Slim: Oh boy.

(Tart is going to be very much against leaving his fort alone for the mission if BB is going to have access to it all day djdnfk)

***
Bookwyrm
.........
*Razz checks his phone-
....... 40 texts. From Blue and Stretch.*
Razz: .... Lord Hater, why do I have to deal with so many skeletons?
LH: Mew.
*Ranger is able to slip under the door and into the room.*

Living Room:
Tart: DROP MY LEGO!
BB: NO! I FOUND IT!
Tart: IS THAT MY PUFFBALL!?! I ONLY HAVE 3 OF THOSE!!!
BB: I LIKE IT!
Slim: BB you can't take Tart’s stuff. Maybe you and Tart can explore the living room. If you find something you can bring it to me and I can tell you if you can keep it.
BB: *Locks on to Tart.* OH MY STARS YES! TART LETS GO!
Tart: DROP MY PUFFBALL FIRST! YOU THIEVING BABY BLUE!
Elton: *Is so confused, Frozen is less confusing and he can just sing.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
Razz: I asked them for at least one full week of no contact, and what happens? I get pulled into this whole Bitty world nonsense.
LH: Mew.
Razz: ..... Why is everything so exhausting....
LH: Mew!
Razz: It was a rhetorical question.
*Ranger is listening to Razz mumble to himself.*

Living Room:
Slim: How are you holding up Elton Sweeny?
Elton: Can I watch Frozen again?
Slim: Sure thing pal.
BB: I want this thing! Can I have this thing???
Slim: Sorry, the concrete displays are off limits. Plus I don’t want you getting crushed under them.
BB: These?
Slim: You see, the support stands are equally important to you not getting crushed, so no.
Tart: I found a nickel!
Slim: You can keep the nickel.
BB: HEY! THAT’S MY NICKEL!
Tart: FINDERS KEEPERS!

***
Bookwyrm
Older Brother Chat:
-BlueBerry: RAZZ AM I AN UNCLE???
-BlueBerry: HOW MANY BITTY BABIES DO YOU HAVE?
-BlueBerry: IS THERE REALLY A BABY PAPY?!?!?!
-BlueBerry: RAZZ PLEASE INVITE ME OVER.
-BlueBerry: SLIM SENT A PICTURE OF THE ONE NAMED ELTON SWEENY DESTROYER OF HUMANITY AND I REALLY REALLY WOULD LIKE TO MEET HIM.

Bedroom:
Razz: Dammit Blue. One fucking week. That's all I asked for.
LH: Brrrreow? *Sans pet me.*
Razz: Not only do I have Edge's ass here and Red’s, but Blue wishes to come. What next, Rus and Comic???
LH: Mmrrrrrreow? *Why aren't you petting?*
*Ranger hasn't heard a lot of these names Razz Sans keeps saying.*
*Beep. The phone buzzes. Orchid has sent a message.*

Private Chat:
-Orchid: Sans, how are the babies?

Razz: *Long inhale.*

Living Room:
(I love how Tart and BB go from besties to rivals to enemies in a constant shifting cycle.)

BB: What about this staff?
Slim: *Getting Frozen ready to watch.... for the third time in 24 hours.* BB that's a pen.
BB: Can I have it?
Slim: Did you find it in the pen cup?
BB: Nope! In the couch cushions!
Slim: Sure. There's scrap paper somewhere around here, probably....
Tart: *Searching the couch for a pen for himself, his little legs sticking out of the cushion spaces.*
Drawl: ...... zzz... *Sleeping on the couch, tuckered out from the over use of shortcuts.*

***
HomeHawk12
Bedroom:
*Razz tries to word it as kindly and not annoyed as possible. Stars he still had to go to work in the Bitty world in an hour and that flesh suit takes a while to put on. He starts the process of attaching everything.*

Private Massaging:
-Razz: The new Bitties have made themselves at home. The sick one is back to good health again and has turned out to be a kleptomaniac. The one on the striped shirt loves musicals.
-Queen Toriel: That is good to hear. I know I have some child friendly DVD’s I can loan you.
-Razz: I would be happy to have something playing that isn’t Frozen.

LH: *Spots Ranger standing by the doorway. Silently she hops down to claim her baby skeleton. Someone needs another bath.*

Living Room:
(Idk which Bitties are meant to be compatible with each other but their current relationship is giving me so much life at the moment.)

Slim: *Make a mental note to find some scrap paper and crayons. BB is scribbling all over the paper like a madman.*
Tart: HEY! This isn’t a pen!
Slim: Looks like you found the cap to BB’s pen.
Tart: I AM KEEPING THIS.
BB: BUT MY PEN NEEDS A CAP!
Tart: FIND YOUR OWN CAP!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
*Blue has been blowing up all the Fell skeletons' phones. He desperately wants to meet the new bab- BITTIES.*

Bedroom:
(Holy shit private massage? Damn the Queen better appreciate Razz and his tiny phalanges that hit all the pressure points.)
Razz: Fucking Undyne... why does the flesh suits have to be anatomically correct? I do not like having Thighs!
*LH lightly pounces and scruffs Ranger by the scarf and shirt.*
Ranger: *Whispers.* Hate no! I just took a bath!
*LH needs to make the bitty smell like cat again.*

Living Room:
BB: Please Tart? Please?
Tart: I ONLY TRADE OR BARTER!
Drawl: *Wakes a bit*... are we doing a trade bro? Did we get the wire those alley Bitties wanted?
Tart: DRAWL THAT WAS WEEKS AGO! WE DIDN'T FIND ANY REMEMBER?
Drawl: Mmmmmmmmmkay bro.... zzzzzz….
Slim: .... how did any Sans raise a kid if they act like this.....

(I think BB and Tart are just like Blue and Razz except BB is more klepto with a dash of hoarder and Tart doesn't have the trauma Razz has that makes Razz so tolerant of Blue. I think bitties can get along well enough with each other to share soul power even if they don't get along well. I think Drawl goes with Tart on most things and is laid back. Dente loves everyone. Floof is the chillest. Non-Cherry Fells fight for dominance a bit. It's probably in relation to being owned that really puts strain on bitty relationships. If a regular boss showed up Tart would probably try and fight him with Drawl as backup.)

Chapter Text

HomeHawk12
(Edge eventually had to tell Blue he could meet them once they got settled. Blue doesn’t like that it wasn’t an actual answer. He wants to go shopping to buy the bab- BITTIES presents to spoil them.)

(I like to think SFgore is making breakfast while Orchid is reading out the messages as they come in. They are both concerned parents about their skele child that suddenly became a parent.)

Razz: *Gets the seams on the face hidden.* Stars, why does it have to feel so gross......
Ranger: Hater I said no!
LH: *Picks Ranger up by the back of his sweater. Little kitten is being difficult.*
Ranger: NO! PSK! LET ME GO! *Tries scratching at the cat. He wants down damn it!*

(Now I’m just imagining an Edgy moving in, seeing Ranger and starting to hiss and try fighting for dominance, and all Ranger can do is posture up and wait for Tart and Drawl for help. Oh no Edgy stay away from his soft thing!)

BB: *Whines since he only has a plate and paper clip, plus the clothes on his back. He wishes they would have gone back for the tacks.*
Tart: CROCODILE TEARS WONT WORK ON ME BABY BLUE! IT’S A REAL TRADE OR NOTHING!

***
Bookwyrm
(Blue wants to be a proper uncle DAMMIT.)

*LH pads over to Razz, who is sitting on the edge of the bed. LH curls up on the pillows, pinning Ranger for his bath.*
Ranger: PSK! Shoo! No! Stop Hater! No licks!
Razz: *Is trying to force the finger bits on his hands, looks over*..... Ranger? Are you okay?
Ranger: RAZZ SANS SHE WON’T STOP LICKING!

(Ranger is like a fluffed up kitten. All fake danger. Edgy is intimidated by Ranger’s size and possible reputation as a Boss. Tart is really the only one ready to throw down. Edgy is not liking that large blade of Tarts. Tart has to basically posture back.... and later tells the Edgy that Ranger is basically a Cherry.)

Slim: ... BB if you help me get Sans’s fanny- .... belt pack... set up I'll give you a taquito. I think Tart might trade for the tiny taco thing.
BB: Really?!?
*Elton has made his way to Drawl to cuddle while watching Frozen.*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: They all make things more difficult dam it. Okay Hater, time to leave Ranger alone. *Takes the Bitty and puts him on the dresser. LH is not happy.*
LH: MEOW!
Razz: I’m sorry, but I have to leave in twenty minutes and you're making my life harder.
LH: MEOW!
Razz: I’ll play with you when I get home, actually, I’ll get Slim to play with you in the meantime.

(Edgy doesn’t know how to handle this news. On one hand, he’s not a typical Boss. On the other hand, his inner asshole says he can get revenge on past Bosses for their mistreatment of him.)

Slim: Okay, we got fabric, a little jacket in case one of the Bitties gets cold, and Cheerios. Anything else you can think of?
BB: Pens and paper if they get bored!
Slim: For the other office Bitties..... that’s not a bad idea.

***
Bookwyrm
(Razz had cut some crayons to silvers once he saw the prices on the bitty crayons. Honestly the ones Razz cut are better, according to Tart.)

*Slim is always startled by the 'human' Razz. It's just fucking freaky.*
Razz: Drawl? Tart? You about ready? Red and Edge should be here soon. Oh shit-
BB: LANGUAGE!
Razz: *Forgot Ranger on the dresser.* Papyrus? Can you play with Lord Hater a bit? *Returns for the Bitty.*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Sorry about that Ranger. *Picks him up and carries him in his palm until he can get the belt bag.* You all ready to go?
Ranger: You got the beanbags Maraschino asked for?
Razz: Yes, I got everything we need.
*A knock at the door signals Red and Edge are here. The scientists were sure those two especially had 20 different outfits, since human women rarely wore the same clothes twice in a row. Meet pantsuit Edge and Sweater dress Red, with lots of cleavage.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz: I can't tell which of you looks trashier.
Red: Shut it fanny pack. I didn't choose a dress a few sizes too small on purpose. It was yer fish bitch.
Razz: Belt bag, prick.
Edge: I thought this wasn't so bad....
Razz: like you need six martinis to function.
Edge: ... that doesn't actually sound too bad right now.

***
HomeHawk12
Elton: Mister Boss- I mean Mister Edge! Good morning! *Waves from Slim’s shoulder excitedly.*
Edge: Why hello Elton Sweeny Destroyer of Humanity. How did you sleep?
Elton: Mister SlimJim’s bed was super comfy! And he has a cool pet spider! What was her name?
Slim: Monica.
Elton: Monica!
Razz: *Whispers to Red.* What's with the look on your brother’s face? With the human mask it's freaking me out.
Red: Boss has gone full mama bird, and the little shits don't even live with us yet. Made a whole shopping list of supplies he would need ta grab after work. And don’t get me started on the elevators he’s been working on so they don't have ta climb so much.
Razz: Well, at least it’s directed to the Bitties and not me.
BB: Good morning Mister Red! *Rushes over to hug his shoe in greeting.*
Red: Heh, good seeing ya too.
BB: The big SlimJim said he would help me make tiny tacos!
Red: Ah, sounds great.
Edge: BB, I'm shopping after work, mind telling me some things you are in need of?
BB: *Eyelights sparkling.* Really?!
Edge: If you want stuff tell me now, because I don't plan on stopping at the Bitty store again anytime soon.
BB: I WANT EXPLORERS GEAR! AND A BACKPACK! CAN I GET BOOTS? AND A NICKEL!!!

(So I looked up how big Barbies are. They are 12 inches tall. I forgot how tall they actually were.)

***
Bookwyrm
(Barbies are just thin and have legzzzzzzzzz)

Razz: Ugh these flesh suits are so irritating.
Red: I have new respect for fleshies.
Ranger: Do you think Maraschino will like the beanbags?
Red: Heh, found a buddy at work?
Razz: My desk is slowly becoming the place to leave Bitties. And Maraschino is a Cherry he met yesterday.
Edge: What kind of explorer outfit? A vintage style one? And... Why a nickel?

Slim: ..... Sand? Are we out of taquitos? .... I'm going to the store, need anything?

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: Other than mental help, bananas and milk, I think I’m good.
Slim: Got it. BB can watch Elton while I'm out. *He doesn't trust BB in the grocery store.*

Red: Heh, maybe Drawl will wanna visit and make friends sometime.
Razz: Doesn’t he have several hundred Bitties in the factory to befriend?
BB: NICKELS ARE SHINY!
Edge: I see. *Marks down a few outfits for Elton to grow into that are not only lounge wear.*
BB: I'm gonna explore all the house vents and find all the secret cool stuff!
Edge: Okay, so you meant more like protective gear then a stylish look?
BB: Yes!

***
Bookwyrm
(BB would be a menace in the store.)

Slim: Sans, I can call the therapist for that and pick up bananas and milk.
Razz: Papyrus, don't start with that right now.
Slim: Kay Ssns.
Red: I think I'm with the Sansys at first.
Razz: They can sleep/nap friendship thing together.
Red: What pissed in your coffee?
Razz: I am out of coffee. HEY PAPYRUS? Grab the list before you shop!

***
HomeHawk12
Razz: *Sends a quick text to Orchid asking for more SFGore coffee.* Okay, time to head out, BB, don’t cause too much destruction. Elton, keep the TV volume lowered.
Edge: Oh yes, a wonderful opportunity for the two of you to bond before moving to your new home.
Razz: less talking more getting the work day started and over with!

Elton: G-get to know the Baby Blue.... *Looks at BB waving Red off while all the big skeletons leave.* O-okay. I can do this.

***
Bookwyrm
Elton: *approaches BB *...B… BB?
BB: *Is searching the couch again.* Hmmmm, yeah..?
Elton: Would... um.... What are you doing?
BB: Looking for treasure.
Elton: Oh....
BB: Need help putting Frozen on?
Elton: … n-no, um... I wanted... to get to know you better?

*Razz gets to his office, before most of his coworkers. He and Ranger arrange the bitty lounge.*

*Red is on soul time duty first thing in the morning for the Sansys.*

*Edge has a few meetings to schedule and paperwork to fill out.*

***
HomeHawk12
Razz’s Place:
BB: Oh..... ummmm..... I like things? Shiny things, soft things, hard things. All kinds of things really..... also Mister Red...... that’s all I really know about myself.
Elton: O-okay.
BB: Maybe you can, uh, tell me about you?
Elton: I like Frozen, and singing is fun! Also lasagna is tasty.... and warm baths and giant beds are nice....
BB: ..... Anything else?
Elton: I-I don’t know? That’s all I know except for what they were teaching us before I escaped.... I don’t know who I really am......

Accounting:
Razz: *Sets up the circle of beanbags separate from Ranger’s coffee mug throne. He saved the bright red colored bean bag for Ranger specifically since it’s the one he can most easily find without help, and it’s special like Boss seats are supposed to be. The less brightly colored beanbags, plus a little plate for snacks, is also put down. Perfect.*
.......
*The humans are all going crazy about how cute the setup is when they enter.*

Lab:
*Red is having a pretty standard, relaxed morning giving soul time to the Sansys and performing weight checks..... until an experimental Grillby Bitty apparently set someone’s lab coat on fire by accident which caused a big mess. Apparently the biggest issue with the flame Bitties is their tendencies to accidentally light stuff of fire.*

Office:
*The VP and Research head bring a pair of Tale Goat monster Bitties to the office, hoping to see how a well trained Raspberry Bitty would interact.*

***
Bookwyrm
BB: .... want to… help me look?
Elton: S-sure!
*Elton is hoping that if BB likes him they can be brothers. Like Drawl and Tart.*

Accounting:
*The man next to Razz is pretty much gushing over the little throne. Razz is not amused at all. The two coworkers with a lil bro and a reaper seem interested in leaving the bitties in this little space. Maraschino has yet to arrive.*

Lab:
*Red is called in to help while the human gets tended to for burns and the broken glass from a dropped measuring utensil. He is..... well, not shocked, maybe surprised, at there being a Grillby from his universe. He knew Comic’s Grillby had a bitty in the works but not his...... apparently a few names are in the works Chillbitty (Chillby), Fellbitty (Fellby) and a few others.*

Office:
(Now they are just using "Jasmina's" apparent Fell bitty wrangling for testing)

*There seems to be a Tori and Asgore. Tart has an ....odd feeling to cater to the Toriel.*
Tart: … Who's that?
VP: These are the king and queen line of bitties. They have a caring and regal air to them. And are extremely fluffy.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz’s Place:
Elton: I found something!
BB: What is it?!
Elton: It's a massive clump of orange hair!
BB: That’s rare in this house, put it in the special pile!

Accounting:
*The Lil Bro and Reaper were already sitting at his desk when Maraschino and his owner finally arrive. Maraschino looks nervously at the other Bitties.*
M. Owner: Oh my gosh it’s a little Bitty lounge! Look Mar! Now you can make more friends!
Maraschino: *Nervous whimper but his owner doesn’t care. She places him on the desk.*
M. Owner: Have fun sweetie!

Lab:
*The Fellby is giving Red weird looks. Red also can’t help but notice the Grilbitties don’t have clothes.... or much of anything remotely flammable in the room.*

Red: Not to overstep my boundaries or anything, but why are we working on flame based pets when you are still having issues with them actually catching things on fire? This doesn’t seem safe to..... sell to everyday people.

Office:
(“Jasmina” is getting all the attention for being a Fell virtue savant.) (Some things are just bred into Bitty’s I guess lol. Every Razz version will ALWAYS love their Queens.)

BittyTori: Why hello there little one.
Tart: Hey! You’re small too!
BittyTori: Oh my!
Tart: S-sorry.....
Bittygore: It’s okay honey. I believe he is one of the rougher types.
VP: *Picks up the little Asgore and holds him in front of Edge.* Here, try petting him. He is far more plush than normal goats.
***
Bookwyrm
(Omg BB already knows Razz’s habits.)

Razz’s Place:
Elton: What do you think Edge’s house will be like? They said he was making it bitty friendly.... think we will get to go there tonight?
BB: Maybe? There might even be tacks.

Accounting:
(I can't remember the Cherry owner's name I think it was Jasmine or Cheryl.)
Razz: hello Maraschino. I got the cushions I told you about. Ranger is already settled in.

Mort (Reaper bitty): Heya.
Bumble (lil bro): ...zzzzzzz....
Maraschino: Oh… uh.... oh.

***
Bookwyrm
Lab:
Man working with the grillbitties: Thst’s what we are trying to figure out. So far most things of cheap plastic or cotton catch fire. If they don't pay attention. We are working on fire resistant clothes.
Red: Ah. *He has forgotten that the flesh suit he has on is an older model without pain sensors.... hopefully he doesn't get burned.*

Office:
(Even if there isn't Swapfell Tori yet. This Tori is close enough.)

*Edge quickly accepts the Asgore, letting him be on his hand rather than held firmly.*
Edge: May I?
Bittygore: Oh! Yes you can. Lovely manners.
VP: Look at that, they warmed right up to you. Some of the techs only get irritated huffs.

***
HomeHawk12
Razz’s Place:
Elton: What’s a tack?
BB: Didn’t you learn about them in class?!
Elton: ..... no?
BB: .... allow me to educate you on the greatest treasures this world has to offer!

Accounting:
Ranger: You can sit in the bean bag next to me if you would like?
Maraschino: *Spots the empty olive green bean bag next to Ranger, rushing over to it and sitting down.... trying to inconspicuously scoot a little closer to Ranger.

***
HomeHawk12
Lab:
Red: ..... What about wood and carpeting? And drywall? Would wood furniture be an issue? What about couches? Are we teaming up with furniture producers so they are sure to not make cheap furniture and only use anti-flammable material? Then again..... people aren’t going to wanna put a whole bunch of new furniture and even carpeting...... What if they accidentally burn a child?

Office:
Edge: *Talking to the bitty.* Do the lab techs usually ask for permission?
Bittygore: No, normally they just reach in and touch me in all sorts of inappropriate places. Sometimes they even grab me or Tori very roughly. No manners at all.
*Edge looks over to the VP giving him an annoyed look.*

***
Bookwyrm
Razz’s Place:
Elton: I didn't finish school...
BB: I’ll teach you everything you need to know then. And that means we need tacks. And more paper.

Accounting:
*The two sensitive Fells being 'tough' in front of the sleeping lil bro and the relaxing reaper.*
....
Mort: Are those snacks for anyone or just the boss?
Ranger: .... anyone.
Mort: Nice. *floats over.*
Razz: Oh? You float? I thought only the outer sansy did that.
Mort: Reapers were a Halloween limited release.

Lab:
Man: That's why these are for testing only. The future grillbitties will have lesser flames.
Red: *Now seeing the name tag.* Shawn, is it? Why even make living flames then?
Shawn: Practical application. They could be brought along to cold areas for heat or help with the elderly.

Office:
VP: *Doesn’t notice.* The techs worked hard to get them just that fluffy.
Edge: They did get that part right.
Bitty Tori: *Next to Tart.* Aren’t you adorable!
Tart: I'm not cute!

***
HomeHawk12
(Heh. Mort.... Mortician XP)

Razz’s Place:
*Slim enters the front door, seeing BB with his few pieces of scrap paper and a pen making crude drawings and pointing to them.*
BB: As you can see, tacks come in many shapes and sizes! Giant SlimJim! I require more paper to educate the striped shirt.

Accounting:
Razz: I see, so your types are out of production?
Mort: Yep. The Reapers, the Respites, and Both Horror types were limited run kinds. Though I think the Horrors were popular enough last Halloween with farmers that they are going to be released again in another limited run. Apparently they are as effective as barn cats without destroying local song bird populations.
Razz: Interesting. How do you like coming into the office every day?
Mort: Eh, it’s alright, a bit boring though. A Bitty library would be cool so I could get some new tiny books I can actually lift, or even smartphones or something to read on during the boring sections. I can only nap for so long throughout the day.
Bumble: .... agreed.... zzzz.....

Lab:
Red: Interesting.... if they are made for cold climates and elderly, why make little asshole ones.
Shawn: Colour variety of course.

Office:
Bitty Tori: So adorable. *Gives Tart a small, kind pet on the head. Tart can’t help but lean into the kind touch.*

***
Bookwyrm
(Mort is also Latin for death.)

Razz’s Place:
Slim: …. What are you doing???
BB: Educating the young on the brilliance of tacks.
Slim: ......
Elton: Tackd are shiny and stabby.
Slim: .... There's more to life than tacks.
BB: Yeah, nickels.
Slim: ...... I can see if we have more paper... Maybe a sticky note.
BB: I HAVE SEEN THOSE BEFORE CAN I HAVE ONE?!?
Slim: After taquitos.

Accounting:
Razz: I don't know about books... I can see what I can do though.
Maraschino: You’ve done a lot already Sheldon.... we are fine...
Razz: You need things to do just like people.
Mort:...... This bean bag is nice.

Lab:
Red: ...
Shawn: Some people like a tiny asshole to keep them company.
Red: Huh.
Shawn: Fells seem to fit right in with protection jobs, biker gangs, veterans, and older single men.
Red: That’s... interesting.

Office:
Tart: .... Mooooomma! Tell her I'm not cute!
Bitty Tori: *Pulls Tart into a hug.* Aren’t you just the cutest!

***
HomeHawk12
(How could I forget the teachings of Unus Annus???)

Razz’s Place:
Elton: What are we watching now? Is it more singing???
Slim: Nope. These are some videos I happened to pick up from Toriel. (She visited him at the grocery store) It is called The Magic School Bus.

Accounting:
*Gets his phone out and downloads Jetpack Joyride.*
Razz: Here, try playing around with this on mute for a while.
Mort: How does it work?
Razz: I think you need to touch the screen to make the character rise.
*Mort experimentally taps the screen lifting the character up, then watches him crash and burn a second later.*
Mort: Heheheheh.
Bumble: *Peaks a socket open to watch.*
Maraschino: *Leans over so he can watch, currently very curious.*

Lab:
Red: So what about the softer Bitties?
Shawn: Those have proven very popular with all crowds. Women, families especially, and children to a certain degree. The skeletons cannot be left with children under ten unsupervised as they are quite fragile. The goat Bitties will make far better babysitters.

Office:
*This Bitty Tori and her softness is making Tart feel warm and fuzzy and he doesn’t know how to react.*
Edge: Do be careful ma’am, he is quite fierce. He has threatened to cut people before.
Tart: And I’ll do it again too!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Razz’s Place:
Slim: apparently some of it is outdated and not believed to be true anymore, but it would be a good place to start.
Elton: .... no singing?
BB: .... is it about exploring?
Slim: I think it's got exploring....

Accounting:
*The bitties take turns minus Ranger. He can't see the obstacles too well. Mort and Bumble have been competing for the high score.*

Lab:
Shawn: There's a demand for bitties that can help keep children safe, and Baby Blues and Blueberries can only go so far. They are more like an explorer buddy and ready made friend than a caretaker and adult attitude.
Red: .... that sounds like a mini mom.
Shawn: ....hmmm. Maybe that is a good idea. Maternal care.

Office:
Bitty Tori: I'm sure he doesn't really mean it. Look how sweet he is!
Tart: I AM NOT SWEET.
Bitty Tori: *Rubs Tart’s head.* You’re so good for your momma.
VP: You sure are.
*Edge hates that word so much.*

***
HomeHawk12
Elton: *Loves the theme song. He is slowly memorizing the lyrics with each episode they watch.* ~Surfin’ on a sound wave, Then you’re swingin’ through the stars, Take a left at your intestine, Take your second right past Mars On The Magic School Bus!~
BB: I liked the.... what was the thing that separated the colors from normal light again?
Slim: Prism?
BB: Yes! Can I get one please????
Slim: I’ll drop my bro a text.

Accounting:
Mort: Mr. Dankworth? I think you got a message alert. *Tries to hand the phone over, but it’s heavy.*
Razz: Thank you Mort. *Takes a look at the message, asking if he could pick up a prism and maybe a child’s science kit at some point? Razz sends a quick reply and turns notifications off for the time being, not wanting the Bitties to accidentally see something they shouldn’t. * Sorry about that. You guys can keep playing if you would like.

Lab:
Red: Almost sounds like we are making..... oh, what’s the word? Unpaid..... laborers?
Shawn: Of course not. They pay us the money for the Bitties so everything is fine.
Red: ....

Office:
Bitty Tori: *Happily stroking Tart’s head while his arms are crossed and he’s sulking.*
Bitty Asgore: *Trying to explain his concerns about the lab techs and researchers handling of the Bitties and how they could make things far easier. Edge is literally parroting the words back to the VP since he seems to pretend the Bitty can’t explain himself or something.*

***
HomeHawk12
(Okay I just had to wonder how Doomfanger would react to the little Tale Bitties. Lord Hater had the shit kicked out of her by cowboy Tart. I don’t think BB and Elton have it in them to stand up to an old angry Tom cat)

***
Bookwyrm
Razz’s Place:
Elton: so .... what's with the fluffy thing?
Slim: *Has Hater in his lap.* This is a cat. Common pet. Edge has one too.
BB: .... Do they have saddles?
Slim: Probably somewhere.
BB: ..... is Tart getting a saddle?
Slim: Dunno. Also Razz says to ask Edge for one.
BB: A saddle?
Slim: The prism.

Accounting:
*Razz is irritated with how messy the accounting system is. It is wildly inefficient.*
Maraschino: ....Ranger? Can... ... Can we hug?

Lab:
Shawn: Like service animals. You don't pay service dogs or therapy cats. You just take care of them.
Red: But these guys can talk.
Shawn: So can parrots and some other animals.

Office:
VP: You know the ideas sound so much sweeter out of your lips.
*Edge is three seconds from ripping off his lips and throwing them at the man.*

(Doom most likely will at one point strand a bitty on top of the fancy cat tower Edge definitely has. Which leads to Edge bitty-proofing it.)

***
HomeHawk12
BB: Can you ask Edge for me?
Slim: He’s already spending a crap ton of money on you today. Ya may wanna wait a little bit.
BB: *Turns around and sulks.*
Elton: Sound waves? What are sound waves?
Slim: Let’s watch the episode and find out.

Accounting:
*Ranger heard the desperation and hope in Maraschino’s voice. Plus he is always up for cuddles.*
Ranger: Okay, we can hug- *Maraschino practically hops into Ranger’s lap and starts purring. Happy affection yay!*

Lab:
Shawn: Listen, I know you’re new here, and may not understand how things work in Ebbott City. Bitties are animals that we created. Not fellow humans. They are made for a purpose, and talks like what you're saying have gotten people fired before. If you keep this up, someone will report you.
Red: *Really wanting to smash this guy's face in, but keeps in line.* Right, I appreciate the warning.
*Drawl is sitting in his fake cleavage feeling horrible about the words said. Red pats his head gently hoping to comfort him on the way back to their appropriate lab.*

Office:
VP: *Puts his hand on the armrest of Edge’s chair, getting way too close for comfort. Edge is trying to figure out if he can kick him in the dick and make it look like an accident.*

(They just can’t show fear to the big lug.... he doesn’t take crap like Lord Hater will.)

Chapter Text

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
*BB pouts throughout the show.*
Slim: You could probably get an RC bus one day. It would be like a regular car to you guys.

Accounting:
*Razz snaps a picture. He may not like photo evidence against himself but the Bitties are a different matter.*
*The lil bro sleepily looks over.... and is in shock at a boss cuddling a cherry in his lap.*

Lab:
Drawl: .... I almost forgot how the humans in this world treat bitties. It's not like how you and Razz Sans and Slim and Edge do.
Red: It's fucked up.

Office:
Edge: You have a 2 o'clock at the Civic Center to promote bitties sir.
VP: That's today? Ugh. The things I do for PR.

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
BB: Wait, they make tiny cars???
Slim: Yeah, never seen one that didn’t require a remote to drive but they exist.... uhhh, you okay?
BB: I MUST DRIVE ONE!

Accounting:
Mort: Hey, you good Bumble?
Bumble: *Jaw hanging open, pointing at the cuddly Fell Bitties.*
Mort: .... the heck?

Lab:
Red: *Returns to the Sansy room and starts weighing Bitties again, with a new aura of irritation that the child Sansys can sense, and are now getting nervous.*

Office:
VP: *Sigh.* Very well then. *Grabs a pet carrier from his office.* Okay you two, get in.
Bitty Toriel: It doesn’t look very safe.....
Bitty Asgore: Why do we have to travel in that? We aren’t going to run.
VP: Get. In.

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: Maybe wait for a holiday? Add it when you're settled at Edge’s.
BB: .... make me a list, giant SlimJim.
Slim: For what?
BB: I need to write out what I want in what order.
Elton: I like Carlos.

Accounting:
Razz: Let them. A cherry gets special treatment.
Bumble: I have never seen that, and there were 6 bosses in the store with me.

Lab:
Drawl: *Sees the sansy distress*..... *Huff.* Hey momma? We still getting burgs after this?
*Like 10 sansys are immediately interested.*
Red: You like those too? I thought you were a burrito fan?
Drawl: I've always wanted to taste a burger.

Office:
*BittyToriel huffs. The two enter with Edge silently pissed.*
VP: I’ll see you later. Maybe we can try out that new steakhouse?

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
*Slim already regrets everything leading up to this moment, as the list is almost a full page already.*
Elton: Wait, they are exploring the inside of a fleshy human??? Gross! Ewww!
Slim: *Has to pause his writing as he knows very little about the meaty sections of humans. A morbid curiosity he may or may not regret.*

Accounting:
Razz: He has a soft spot for Maraschino. They got along well yesterday.
Bumble: A Boss showing public affection like this.... did he suffer a head wound?
Ranger: *Overhears the conversation. He’s gotta do something to shut them up.*

Lab:
Sansy 1: What’s a burg?
Sansy 2: Like an “iceberg”?
Sansy 3: Can I eat it?
Drawl: Ya can actually, and it’s short for “hamburger.” Though I’ll remember the iceBurg thing for later...
Red: Tell ya what. If everyone behaves I’ll see if I can sneak one in. Don’t tell anyone though or ya get nothing.

Office:
Edge: ..... Perhaps.... I am a very busy ma- woman after all.
VP: Dedicated to her work on and off the clock. I really did hire a catch.
Edge: *Imagines “catching” this douche with a giant hook and gutting him like a fish. He’s grateful when the man finally leaves.* How much longer till my shift is over?
Tart: Three hours.
Edge: ..... Hopefully he will get lost on the way and I’ll never see him again.
Tart: Maybe fall into a pit full of tacks.
Edge: And Legos with bare feet.

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: .... humans just... ooze and pulse like that? All the time??? Ewwwww.
Elton: That just looks complicated.
BB: SlimJim? I have more to write on the paper. Hey! I wanna add more!

Accounting:
Ranger: .... fuck off, I do what I want. *Hopes that's enough.*
Bumble: Bosses don't cuddle unless they need soul time.
Mort: Eh. Let them be.
Razz: Sleaking of soul time, let me know if you need any. It's not a big deal. *Dammit Samantha stop sending me your assignments, I am not your assistant.*

Lab:
*Like faulty light bulbs, stars pop in the sansys sockets. Red doesn't know how to feel with this much pure essence and positive attention. The sansys are more cooperative.*

Office:
Tart: ......... can... I trap his office? *Wary from the earlier scolding.*
Edge: Probably not a good idea.... to do spontaneously.... maybe if I approve of your plans.

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
BB: Slim Jim! Why are you ignoring me?! I said I want more on my list!
Slim: ...... should I just skip this episode? All the fluids are..... oh stars- *Feels like he’s ready to vomit.*
Elton: Human ears make wax???? Why do ears make wax????

Accounting:
Bumble: *Feels suspicious of Ranger*..... are you sure you have a Boss Bitty and not another type in disguise?
Ranger: Bitch did I stutter?!
Razz: Bumble, I told you to stop it. Just play more phone games and stop asking.
Bumble: ..... whatever.

Lab:
Sansy 1: What other types of foods are there?
Red: Hmmmmm..... first chance ya get, ya gotta try mustard and French fries.... actually, ya guys might like ketchup more.

Office:
*Tart spends the rest of the time just plotting potential ways to trap the office, Edge scheduling more meetings and filing paperwork, enjoying all the ideas Tart is coming up with, but having to turn them down.*

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
BB: Who cares how gross humans are? Let's get back to what's important! I need to make sure I am ready if... if I ever need to be!
Slim: Ready for what?
BB: None of your business!
Elton: Wait, humans have skeletons trapped inside them?!?

Accounting:
Razz: This is a no judgement zone. All bitties can come, ok? No matter how they are built or act. I won't tolerate bullies though. From anyone. It's almost lunch, you guys want to watch a free movie? If you find any. I think you can watch with ads for a free one.
Mort: Lunch and a movie?
Razz: Sure. Just keep the sound low. I need to finish this.
Ranger: .... you aren't working too hard, are you?

Lab:
Sansy 2: Oh! I've heard of that! We are supposed to like ketchup. I think we get our first taste on shipping day. As a present.
Red: .... I can probably sneak in a packet er two.
*The measurements go much faster with both Red and the sansys on speaking terms and distracted from Red’s anger.*

Office:
Tart: ..... no water balloons?
Edge: No. That could damage documents I need.
Tart: ..... no cling wrap traps?
Edge: You can't unroll it yourself.
Tart: ...... annoying cricket sound?

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
(Lol Is BB a doomsday prepper with no idea how to do it right?)

Slim: I know Elton, it’s disturbing.
Elton: We have to save them!
Slim: Don’t worry, the skeletons are eventually freed.... humans are apparently nothing but flesh sacks without them.
Elton: Oh gosh.

Accounting:
Razz: Finds a very old film called “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang” for the Bitties to watch. He determines Elton would love the musical numbers.*

Lab:
Red: Hmmmm.... do ya guys know what socks are?
Sansey 1: It's human clothing, right? I think we get little ones with our new clothes on shipping day.
Red: Wait till ya see the magnificence of a full sized sock.

Office:
Tart: But blow darts would be genius ! We can sneak laxative into his bloodstream directly!
Edge: .... I don’t think that’s how laxative works?

***
Bookwyrm
(I mean he did get shut in a freezer. And he gets pack rat tips and tricks from Tart and Drawl.)

Apartment:
Slim: It’s so weird how they kinda just hold food in their meat sacks. Like, that's a lot of weight to carry.
Elton: It's so gross.
BB: Add cotton balls SlimJim.
Slim: Slim or Papyrus when in this world works. I have only heard bits and pieces on how they make more humans and it's even worse.

Accounting:
*Mort's owner comes to bring him back to their desk, thanking Razz.*
Ranger: .... are their other bitties in the office, Bumble?
Bumble: Ypu could look around if your owner says it's OK. Just stay out of the middle of the walkway.

Lab:
Red: *Looks around.* So I got one stashed in this purse thing somewhere. *Digs through it.*
*Socks plus sansys make adorable little campers.*

Office:
Tart: ..... oh. Humans are complicated. It would be easier to stab it in.
Edge: Uh huh. Well you have yet to come up with a way to secretly prank without backlash.

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
(Okay, good point lol)

Elton: Where do human babies come from then?
Slim: ..... I’ll tell you when you’re older.
Elton: Why?
Slim: Trust me when I say it’s gross..... where are you going BB?
BB: Away!
Slim: Why?
BB: Because you keep ignoring me!

Accounting:
Ranger: O-okay.... I understand.
Bumble: … yeah. *Eying him oddly.* You’re a weird Boss, you know that?
Razz: I said no judgments here.

Lab:
Supervisor Tony: *Enters Sansy room. Hears dozens of Sanseys giggling like crazy*. Diamond? Is everything alright? *Sees the child Bitties turning around and running into a pair of human sized yellow socks. One sock is a peek-a-boo snake tunnel game, and the other has been turned into a tent.*
Diamond: Hey boss. Ya won’t believe how cooperative they are when socks are involved.

Office:
Tart: Give me time dammit! You keep turning down the best ideas!
Edge: Because every one of yours so far would get me fired.
Tart: You are just too nit picky.

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
*BB pouts at the other end of the couch.
Slim has... never had to work with children much... Chara kinda does their own thing really..... and BB is technically.... a young adult, just at the edge of his teenage weeks. Slim doesn't know how to deal with basically a high-school level kid. Elton is easier; he's like just about the middle school age equivalent.*
Slim: .... BB, you do know you can talk to Edge about this. He is going to take you to his home after today's work. Then you can make a better list once you see what he has.

Accounting:
Bumble: Kay.
*Razz's manager sauntered up behind him.*
Manager: Sheldon, can you look at these invoices? I just got them and I don't have time before I need to meet with the department head.

Lab:
Tony: .... I don't see a problem if you're not spending company dime on it. I'll see if advertising might want to get a few pictures of sansys in socks. Great job Diamond.
Red: Just gotta find what they like.
Drawl: I still wanna burger after this.
Red: Drawl, buddy.
Drawl: *Smirks.* I wanna see how Tart reacts to it.

Office:
*Tart doesn't get a plan approved before Edge’s shift is over.....*
*Edge is packing up and grabbing his bag when he hears a whistle.... the VP was apparently enjoying Edge’s figure as he retrieved his bag.*

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
BB: I’m not going to remember my list though! I never remember anything! What if there is something important I need and I forget about it until I need it and then I’m dead because I don’t have it!?!?
Slim: .... Maybe you can start keeping your own list?
BB: I can barely even write with your massive pens.....
Slim: I’ll finish your list for today at least. I’m pretty sure Edge was gonna get properly sized writing utensils-
Elton: SlimJim! What’s that thing? It looks like Monica!
Slim: That is a trapdoor spider.... and the kids are shrunk down to tiny size..... Thank goodness Razz isn’t here for this episode....

Accounting:
Razz: Yes ma’am, right away. *The manager sets the paperwork down on Razz’s desk, leaning in close so her cleavage is practically touching his face before pulling up and smiling.*
Razz: ..... As I said, I’ll get it done.
Manager: Thank you!
Razz: Right....
*Bumble’s owner stops by to pick him up, thanking Razz before leaving. Cheryl comes a few minutes later.*
Cheryl: Did you have fun Mar?
Maraschino: Y-Yeah.... Mr. Sheldon let us watch a movie on his phone.
Cheryl: He did? Thank you so much for keeping him occupied.
Razz: No trouble at all. I’m always happy to host them.
Cheryl: I’ll have to tell the rest of the office about your services. I know plenty of people who would pay for Bitty play dates during meetings.

Lab:
*There is a loud chorus of Sansys shouting goodbyes as Red and Drawl leave for the day. He let the Bitties keep his socks.*
Drawl: Can’t believe how popular you are.
Red: All kids need something to keep them occupied. It’s shitty they get left with nothing most of the time.

Office:
Edge: .... *Ignores him and steps out into the hallway, internally cursing Alpha for the massive THIGHS on this thing.* Tart, we will reassess your blow dart idea later this evening.
Tart: REALLY?
Edge: Yes, but only after stopping at the Bitty store and returning home. Did you wish to join me, or head home with your brother?

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
BB: WAIT WOULD THE EIGHT LEGGED BEAST ATTACK US?!?
Slim: Probably not? As long as she's fed at least.
BB: Wait, we have to sacrifice to appease IT!?!
Slim: .... I mean... I wouldn't recommend playing in her tank.

Accounting:
Razz: I just think it's good for them to find friends.
Cheryl: I've never seen a person Maraschino is willing to hang out with this long without crying at some point.
Maraschino: *Flushes in embarrassment.*
Razz: Can you point me to where I can drop this off for the manager?

Lab:
Drawl: It’s probably so they get more attached to owners that buy the basic starter packs.
Red: ....that's smart, but cruel.

Office:
Tart: I want to pick out some things BB was talking about.
Edge: I’ll text Slim that you are shopping with me then.

***
HomeHawk12
(Pfft! BB got a little too much Raspberry mixed in when he was born XP)

Apartment:
*BB is on the other end of the couch having a mini freak out while Slim is unsure what to say to calm him.*
Slim: Look, I give her insects to eat and plenty to drink, plus she can't get out of the tank. Just don't play inside with her and you’ll be fine.
BB: So.... She accepts sacrifices of bugs instead of Bitties?
Slim: Basically. *Sees the text message from Edge.* Looks like Tart is stopping at the store with Edge after work.
BB: TELL HIM TO BUY LOTS OF BUGS!

Accounting:
*Razz drops off the paperwork while Maraschino and Ranger say their goodbyes.*
Razz: Ready to go?
Ranger: Y-yeah....
Razz: Is something wrong?
Ranger: I just.... I like spending time with Maraschino....

Lab:
*Red waits for Razz to meet up so he can try and convince him to come get burgers with them.*

Edge’s Escapades:
*Edge and Tart are on their way to the Bitty store.*
Edge: Here you go Tart.
Tart: $50? Why are you giving me so much?
Edge: Consider it your salary for assisting me at the office.
Tart: I don't do anything though.
Edge: Oh yes you do. You make working with that womanizer slightly more bearable. You’re the only reason he isn't dead yet.

***
Bookwyrm
(BB likes living, thank you very much. I think he embodies the spirit of a proud pomeranian. Tart is more.... terrier?)

Apartment:
Elton: Can we watch another, SlimJim?
Slim: Slim or Papyrus. Those work you know. *Puts on the bee episode.*
Elton: .... but you are a SlimJim???

Accounting:
Razz: .... I understand... maybe after... events, we can arrange after work times to meet. Or if Blue decides to take up a shift as Sheldon you can go with him. I wonder if Undyne has gotten the recording devices going yet. The ones to hide on us. Then Blue could memorize what has happened so far and continue the charade.
Ranger: ..... I don't know if I trust Blue that much...
*They walk to Red and Drawl.*

Burg Time:
Red: So we got time to kill since... Jasmina needs to go to the store. How about we grab something to eat?
Drawl: Raz- Sheldon! I'm hungry.
Ranger: Didn’t Red feed you?
Drawl: A sansy went to sleep in the purse and found my snack.

Edge’s Shopping Spree:
(Is it bad I want like 50 bitties calling Edge...... Big Boss at some point?)
(And Edge has such a soft spot for bitties.)

Tart: ................*Star sockets and rushes off.*
*Edge follows to not lose the bitty.*
...............
*Tart has found a brand new set of western style accessories. Not the full outfits, just tiny canteens, rope, saddle bags..... and a tiny horse toy fit for any bitty's dreams of a real one. The horse's limbs can be moved into other poses.*

(Tart would have gone for more Legos but his color scheme wasn't in stock.... he checked.)

***
HomeHawk12
(Bro when you mentioned the “Big Boss” thing I couldn’t stop laughing, but for a different reason then you would think. But yes, we need to have Bitties referring to Edge as Big Boss at some point lmao)
(When I wrote that Bitty fic, one little boss happened to see a documentary on communism, raised a Boss/Edgy army set on world domination in the basement of the lab, and every time a skeleton came across one of the loyalist they would keep saying “Big Boss” (name of the lead Bitty) and everyone thought it was Edge gone mad)

(Also, I totally agree. Tart definitely has the spirit of a terrier, equally as yappy, but with a little more bite to back up the threat lmao)

Apartment:
Slim: Look, the tiny skeletons from your world that look like me are SlimJims, I am one of two skeletons from my dimension, so I’m not part of a group like that.
Elton: But..... but you're a giant SlimJim.....
BB: You are very much in denial, giant SlimJim.
Slim: ......

Burg Time:
Razz: .... “Steak n Shake”?
Red: Supposedly they got the best milkshakes, and fries.
Razz: You know, I don’t really care for fast food.
Red: Hey, this is high quality fast food.

Edge’s Shopping Spree:
Tart: *Sees the expansion kit to the poseable horse, sockets going wide. It’s a track with little cart attachments for the horse figures so they can actually travel around the track like a toy train, and it’s customisable in layout too. He also finds five options in horse colors. Only it’s more money then he has left after his cowboy accessories. He and Drawl could race around the fort.*
Tart: E-Edge, I know you already gave me $50, and I am grateful, b-but I can be a real cowboy and ride a horse and there’s room on the track for a second horse setup and PLEASE I NEED THIS BEFORE I DIE!!!!
Edge: *Unable to resist the adorable massive, pleading eyelights.* ..... which coloured horses did you want?
Tart: BLACK AND BUCKSKIN PLEASE!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
(I remember that! Somewhat. It's been a while.)

Apartment:
Slim: I was made differently than your SlimJims.
BB: Well duh! Every batch is different! They tweak the process every so often to see what changes occur and if they are better ones! You just probably were made too big.
Slim: Noreally, the "large bitties" aren't bitties.
Elton: Were you made in a lab too?
Slim: Yes, but-
BB: See! I bet there were other SlimJims too!
Slim: It's not the same!
BB: ..... *Pats Slim’s knee*.... it's okay to not understand.

Burg Time:
(Dude when Steak and Shake first came out with their garlic burger the local one had some trial and error and they just DOUSED it in the garlic sauce, like dripping with it. I was the only one in my family to be able to stomach it there was so much. So I had like three in the fridge to eat over a while. All basically in a puddle of sauce. Younger me was very proud of my burger skills for whatever reason)

Razz: Those two words don't go together.
Red: Next time we can go to Taco Bell or some shit. There's a spicy jalapeño burger you might like.
Razz: ..... I don't think I will.
Red: The fries are bitty friendly.
Razz: ...... fine.

Edge's Shopping Spree:
*Edge is a simp for bitties. Razz is going to be sooooooo steamed when he sees that Edge has no boundaries when making bitties happy. Edge is looking from things on his list for BB...... Tart pointing out the things that actually work for bitties versus the items that are just for show. You have to be careful with backpacks, most of them are of poor quality.*

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
Slim: I have a complete soul and don’t need another person's soul to recharge!
BB: So did the first Bitties they created.
Elton: See? You’re a big Bitty.
Slim: ......

Burg Time:
(Dude, my friend had a similar experience! I got a traditional burger but he wanted to try the garlic burger. He had a hard time finishing it because it was so doused in garlic. He regretted his choice djdnfk)

Razz: Hmmmm..... they have tiny little milkshake cups for Bitties.....
Red: Alright you two. What flavours do ya want?
Ranger: What flavors are there to choose from?
Drawl: Too many to choose from.
Razz: .... Let's get them a chocolate and vanilla so they can try each other’s.

Edge’s Shopping Spree:
(Edge makes the excuses that he loaned Tart his future earnings from helping keep the VP from trying something worse. It doesn’t help Razz’s saltiness.)

Tart: Here! These are very good backpacks!
Edge: *Grabs some sturdy little gloves and boots for exploring, and a little utility belt and goggles Tart insisted on.* Are the goggles really necessary?
Tart: BB said he wanted some so we need to get some!
Edge: I feel a little bad. Elton didn’t really specify anything on what he wanted.....
Tart: Get him some clothes to grow into? We can get him a backpack to adventure with BB!
Edge: Good idea..... *Grabs some outfits for both BB and Elton, a mix of lazy and not-lazy clothes to try and get Elton to wear. Wait... are those tiny instruments?*

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: I wasn't made as a pet.
BB: So? Some pets are made to work or protect something.
Slim: I’m not a bitty.
Elton: I think you're a very good bitty.
Slim: I am not a bitty.
BB: You let us pile on you like a SlimJim would.

Burg Time:
(I proudly finished 3. Then went into a food coma. Young Wyrm was very proud of being able to eat certain things)

*Razz ends up with the spicy burger.*
*Red watches in anticipation. The guy is a Sans right? He MUST have a secret burger love.*
*Tart really likes the bitty friendly fries.*
*Razz is about to take a bite when he sees Red staring at him.*
Razz: What the fuck are you doing?

Edge's Shopping Spree:
(Razz: You’re going to spoil them and that's not good for them.
Edge: I can do what I like with my funds.)

Tart: For the most part, they don't work real well, they just really make noise. Not really musical.
Edge: ..... Elton would love it.

(Doomfanger does not love it)

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
Slim: I also let Monica sleep on me if she really wants. It’s not that big of a deal.
BB: Wait... you had that thing on you without washing your clothes?!?! I’ve been touching your shirt!!!!

Burg Time:
Red: Nothin’.
Razz: You are staring very intently for “nothing.”
Red: Look, I’m stuffin my face, see? Now go ahead and eat up. *Shoves some mustard covered fries into his mouth.*
Ranger: What flavour milkshake do I have?
Drawl: The white one. I’m pretty sure that’s vanilla.
Ranger: Ah..... would you like to try it?
Drawl: Sure, you can try my chocolate in the meantime. Trade drinks.
Ranger: ...... I think I like vanilla a little more. They are both good though.

Edge’s Shopping Spree:
(Edge is very good at saving money for emergencies.... $400 worth of Bitty stuff is fine, right? The currencies are the same between worlds so surely there is no problem.)

Tart: Hey, what’s with the display up there?
Edge: ....”Impress your friends with the world's smallest functioning keyboard. Your Bitty can learn to actually play piano.”
Tart: Huh, that’s new.
Edge: .... It’s Eltons now. Along with the little snare drum and tambourine..... and maracas.... he can play music with his friends.

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
BB: I have been touching you-WHAT IF IT HAS MY SCENT!?!
Slim: ..... dude she won't hunt you down.
BB: THAT IS NOT REASSURING TALL SLIMJIM!
Slim: .... dude.
Elton: What else can we do?

Burg time:
Drawl: I wonder if they make one with that stuff Stretch gave me....
Razz: *Sends Red a look.... then takes a bite…*
Red: So? How is it? Good right? Not as good as a Grillby Burg though...
*Razz has yet to answer.*

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Red is gonna be resigned when he sees the bill.)

Tart: ......wait you mean me?
Edge: Surely you all can find entertainment in playing an instrument. And there's enough bitties to make a decent band.
Tart: ....um.

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
Elton: Right now? I can start another episode if you’d like.
BB: STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT!
Slim: She’s not gonna try eating you. You don’t have any flesh for her to eat.
BB: SHE COULD SUCK THE MARROW OUT OF BONES!

Burg Time:
Razz: ..... It is edible.
Red: *Grinning with victory, that isn’t an outright denial of the burger.*
Razz: Were you seriously just doing all this to get me to try greasy foods.
Red: Nooooooo..... What gave you that idea?

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Edge is gonna tell him he is only allowed to complain when he brings a sizeable amount of income in.... also Red spends lots on booze so another reason for Edge to justify djdnfk)

Tart: ..... can I play that big drum?
Edge: You mean a bass drum?
Tart: Yes.
*Edge hands it to him. Tart looking it over happily.*
Edge: Was there anything else we needed?
Tart: Did you have a doll house or safe box for them to seek shelter?

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: too much work for too little reward. The cats are more likely to go after you.
BB: WAS THAT A SHORT JOKE!?! .....wait .... where… where is the beast?

Burg time:
Razz: ..... the way you watched me like a hawk.
Red: I’ll get you to Grillby’s one day.
Drawl: Razz, can I try some of that?
Razz: *Disdainful look at Rex, then turns to Drawl.* Of course, here you both can try it.

Edges Shopping Spree
(Red knows this but still chooses to be an ass to his brother...... the bitties are safe enough to be soft around and razz has been more calm as they have gotten to know him. .... there's not so much possible danger)

Edge: I made one myself. Highly defensible. It is close to how my house was underground.
Tart: Bittiws either sleep with an owner or a bitty pile to conserve soul power.
Edge: .... so they won't like separate rooms?

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
*The three go quiet, noticing several long meows in a row, followed by scratching at a door.*
Slim: .... I think she got stuck in Razz’s room.... I’ll just let her out.

Burge Time:
Ranger: Oh wow, this tastes very good. This is spicy?
Razz: Yes.
Drawl: *Coughs on his bit.* I think I’ll stay away from spicy things. That’s a bit hot for me.
Red: Heh, wanna try mine?

Edge’s Shopping Spree:
(Oh yes, I nearly forgot Red suffers from the condition of being a permanent dick jndvjj. Edge saved a lot of money by building his own Bitty house. Probably using scraps from their car garage.)

Tart: No, it feels safer to be cuddled in a pile or with an owner, and usually we make a nest out of stuffing and strips of fabric. Though, given BB’s obsession with stealing things, it may be best for Elton to have a small space to keep his belongings separate.
Edge: *Taking notes.* I see. I will keep that in mind.
*They are headed towards the front of the store, close to where the tanks with Bitties are displayed.*

XxxxxxxxxxxxX
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
*Lord Hater quickly pads her way to the food bowl and noisily munches on her left overs.*

Burg time:
(I think that's Ranger there.)
Drawl: Why’s it so darn yellow?
Razz: He is a heathen, that's why.
Red: It’s the best damn shit.

Edge Shopping Spree:
*Edge stops. There are a few tanks that bitties are stored in next to a play area that has a rotation schedule for the bitties. Just so there aren't too many to handle. There's at least 12 info cards on the first Baby Blue tank alone. Bitties get numbers once they reach a bitty shop. For organizing purposes.*

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
*Slim looks into the room, seeing a pile of cat poop on the floor.*
Slim: .... Well, she was locked in there for over eight hours.... I guess.
Elton: +From Slim’s shoulder with BB.* Woah, it’s huge. What is that????
Slim: Cat poop.
BB: .... It's mine now.
Slim: Trust me, you don’t want that.

Burg Time:
(And I’m mixing up my skeletons again lol)

Drawl: I don't think I’m a big fan of mustard.... I mean, I’ll eat it, but still.
Red: Well, this would be the place to try out a variety of condiments. We got mustard, ketchup, Mayo, horseradish.
Razz: Honestly, my brother isn’t an avid drinker of any condiments like the other lazies.... I am curious myself.

Edge Shopping Spree:
Edge: I can’t believe they have so many here....
Tart: There are currently only two Bitty shops in existence, both in Ebbott City.
Edge: I know.... it’s just sad, and not far off from how I’ve seen the more organized slave traders act back Underground.
*A mob of Baby Blues waves excitedly from one tank, some Blueberries shout hello from another, while a few Raspberries on an upper shelf give Tart a suspicious glare.*
Tart: .... Can we move on soon? I-
*The two freeze, hearing snarling and Bitty cries from the next aisle.*

(Drama has come to the Bitty store.)

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: ... I better clean it up before Sans gets mad at me.... Lord Hater being mad is more than enough.
BB: .... fine. It smells gross anyway.
Elton: Oh no I'm missing my show!!!

Burg Time:
(It’s ok at least they are the same mold.)

*Drawl is set up with fries and a few drops of condiments to try. He tries the mayo first. He immediately asks for a drink to not have to taste that anymore.*

(It'd be hilarious if Drawl likes a BBQ sauce, but Slim likes a syrup more.)

Edge Shopping Spree:
*The drama seems to be a snippy lil shit with a gold tooth backed into a corner.*

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
*Slim drops the two Bitties off on the couch while he cleans the poop. Lord Hater sees the two even tinier, new babies on the couch that do not smell like cat yet.*

Burg Time:
(Give that boy some Sweet Baby Ray's sauce! That shit is good XP)

*Mustard and Ketchup have a similar effect on Drawl.*
Drawl: I’m not a fan of these.
Red: That leaves horseradish, and a few different BBQ sauces to try.

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Ya know, i just realized every time they have been shopping previously a crazy Karen was involved. Like seriously, I don’t remember one trip where they didn’t. The question is.... should the tradition be kept? Or should another thing cause our plot to continue?)

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
*Hater makes her move.*
BB: SLIMJIM THE BEAST IS TRYING TO TASTE ME!!!
*Elton has gone limp, Hater snuggling him to her soft side as she deals with Trouble One.*
BB: SLIIIIIIM JIIIIIIIM!
Slim: *From Razz’s room.* Just a minute I gotta clean this. Hater just wants to be friendly.

Burg Time:
Drawl: *The most disgusted face*... I like horses. I don't like that shit.
Red: Kay mini munch, try the other one.
Ranger: .... I kinda like the horseradish. A little bit. Just a small amount, not a lot on my fry.
Razz: Ranger, careful, the sauce is about to drip.

Edge Shopping Spree:
(What would the bittiverse Karen be like? Someone who thinks an edgy can be forced to play tea party with a young child and then forgets that if she won't pick him up he has to run after her and gets injured by, like, a door slamming into him or something?)

***
HomeHawk12
BB: STOP THIS BEAST!!!! YOUR MOUTH IS GROSS AND YOUR TONGUE PAINFUL!!!! SLIM JIM YOU TRAITOR!!!!
*Lord Hater is just purring happily, Elton getting cozy and purring along with her.*

Burg Time:
*A bit of horse radish drips onto Ranger’s shirt.*
Ranger: O-oh! My shirt got wet.... I made a mess didn’t I?
Razz: Hold still and I’ll wipe it clean.

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Yeah, but if it’s an Edgy she’d probably be dragging it by a harness and it gets tripped on/hit with a door, or her crotch goblins are there and the Bitty bites one of them in self defense only to get slammed against a wall? Honestly I could just see the Karen trying to backhand him for mouthing off which leads to Edge getting pissed.)

Chapter Text

Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: Alright already I'm coming… BB, she is just being friendly.
BB: SHE IS TASTING ME.
Slim: Edge has a cat too. this is practice.

Burg Time:
(Momma Razz.)

Waitress: *Walking up to them.* Awwww! You two are so cute with your bitty babies!
Razz: ...... excuse. Me?
Red: ........*Completely shocked at the mere image of him and Razz together.*
Ranger: *Flushed* I’m... not a baby.

Edge Shopping Spree:
(.... is this The Nibbler's backstory? The evil Karen?)

***
HomeHawk
Apartment:
BB: IT'S TASTING ME TO TELL THE OTHER ONE HOW NUTRITIOUS WE ARE!?!?
Slim: Well, I’m not sure how up for cuddles Doomfanger will be with you guys. The cat's kind of an ass compared to Hater.

Burg Time:
(The nurturing instincts from raising Slim have fully awakened.)

Waitress: Of course you aren’t a baby. You’re a “big strong” boy. *She’s using a baby talk voice.*
Ranger: There! That wasn’t so hard was it?
Drawl: Uhhh, mama? you okay?
Red: *His metal image has expanded to being with Razz and caring for Bitty children. His skull is practically smoking at this point.*

Edge Shopping Spree:
(That’s where I thought we were going when you mentioned a gold toothed Bitty backed into a corner, though it could also be a rando Edgy. Evil Karen being too stupid to know the difference between the Cherries and Edgies. Perhaps it escapes days later after being brutalized by entitlement and crotch goblins? Thus the Nibbler is born.)

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
BB: SLIIIIM!!!
Slim: *Saves the bitty.* You’re fine BB. Look, Elton is just fine and cuddled up.

Burg time:
(Red is gonna give Razz so much shit.)
Razz: *A bit insulted at the waitress's demeanor.* I think we are ready for the check.
Waitress: Sure thing, papa. You have the cutest boys! And a pretty girl too!
Razz: *Twitches.*
Red: Uh....
Razz: Red don't you say a word.

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Just wanted to make sure. The Nibbler finally gnawed his way through the screen door or something. Then The Nibbler is sometime found by Edge. Because Edge is a simp.)
Edge: ....
Karen: Aren't the little gold tooth ones supposed to do as they're told!? Get over here!
*The bitty has an awful pink collar with Sparkles printed on it.*

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
BB: WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?! I thought I would dust at any moment!!!!
Slim: Again BB, this isn’t the only cat you are going to encounter. Get ready for an even larger one.

Burg Time:
*The group pays and leaves, Razz irritated while Red is thoughtful.*
Razz: I vote we meet Edge at the Bitty store. I am not dealing with this shit.
Red: Whatever you say, honey buns~

Edge Shopping Spree:
(Edge makes more trips into town then he ever thought he would, and discovers The Nibbler exhausted, injured and still a bastard.)

Edge: Excuse me Miss, but they are more cooperative if you ask them politely.
Karen: DON’T TELL ME HOW TO TREAT MY BITTY!
Edgy: Get away ya crazy bitch!

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: Doomfanger is ...... extra fluffy according to Edge.
BB: .... oh gosh.
Elton: *Sleepy noises, pulls up Hater’s tail for cuddles.*
Slim: Yeah, Doom is a pampered brat.

Burg Time:
Razz: Don’t make me stab you.
Red: Not in front of the children, hot stuff.
Razz: You really want to die like this?
*Drawl is in a food coma.*

Edge Shopping Spree:
Karen: I thought I said no swearing you little rat!
Edge: Just give him respect and he will do the same, just some scolding is needed once in a while.
Karen: Just because you have a purple one doesn't mean you know how to handle mine!

(The irony)

***
HomeHawk12
Apartment:
BB: ..... Well, he is not allowed to have my paper clip.

Walk Time:
Ranger: .... Drawl? Are you okay?
Drawl: Do me a favor and.... don’t wake me.... zzzzz.....
Red: The waitress said we’re a thing, so obviously we need pet names. So what do ya prefer? Lamb chop or turtle dove?
Razz: *Growl.*

Edge Shopping Spree:
*Looks at the Edgy, in his brother’s usual outfit but with that glittery pink collar and harness attached to a leash. Karen had more frilly stuff in her cart, an eight year old girl's princess dream.*
Edge: My apologies, but last time I checked owners needed a Bitty license to adopt a Bitty, especially of a more challenging type like his.
Karen: I have my license right here! Now mind your own business before I call for a manager!
Edge: .... you got a license? A legitimate license?
Karen: That is it I am getting you thrown out for harassment!
Edgy: Get me away from her! She keeps calling me Gem and her angel’s new pet! I don’t like brats!!!!

***
Bookwyrm
Apartment:
Slim: Cats have a need to push stuff off of tables.
BB: ..... even my stuff?
Slim: Probably.

Walk Time:
Red: Pudding? Kitten? Cherry pie?
Razz: *Barely holds back an attack.* You e v e r call me cherry pie I will end you and send your brother the dust.
Ranger: ..... What's bad about cherry pie?

Edge's Shopping Spree:
Edge: Forcing those clothes on him is a one way ticket to getting bit.
Edgy: THAT GUY UNDER-FUCKING-STANDS!
Tart: *Can feel the edgys pain.*

***
HomeHawk12
Walk Time:
Razz: *Trying to contain his magic before his face flushes purple.* I don’t want ANYTHING to do with the term Cherry. Slim told me it was your ORIGINAL NICKNAME! WHICH THEY LET YOU CHANGE FOR SOME REASON!!!!
Red: Oof. Looks like I’ve been caught.
Drawl: *Yawns and stretches.* Hey, can we stop here for a spell?
Red: Why?
Drawl: I know some wild Bitties that live here. I might be able ta gain us some more informants.