Archive of Our Own ^beta

It is 11:00 PM.

You enter the establishment, Burger King, holding hands with your beloved, Kyoko Yamate. You approach the counter and begin ordering… but what are you going to order? You start sweating, knees weak, arms heavy and head falling. You’re wasting everyone’s time by standing there like an idiot, wondering what to order. It’s fucking Burger King. Just get a goddamn burger.

“I-I… I-I’ll have…”

Kyoko stops you, looking at you with reassuring eyes. “Chicken nuggets. A nine piece. With diet coke.”

Nice. You sigh with relief as Kyoko orders a Triple Whopper. What would you do without her?

“Anything else?”

Kyoko winks at you. She always knows what you want and this time isn’t an exception. “An Oreo Cookie Shake.”

God, you love her so much.

“Great! That’ll be ¥70000!”

W-Why is Burger King suddenly so expensive?! H-How are you going to pay so much money?! Oh dear, what if they’re already making your order, oh dear, oh my—

“K.” Kyoko pays for both of you. But… But how— “I stole Esora’s credit card.”

You sigh with relief. “Nice.”

When your orders are done, you take them and sit at a table. “The food here is very nice,” you say, hopefully not annoying her.

Of course, Kyoko could never be annoyed by anything you do. “It is very nice.”

“When was the last time you had a burger from here?”

“1987.”

“Oh. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“No, it’s okay. It wasn’t nice then, but now it’s nicer.”

Oh, nice. “Can I try your Triple Whopper?”

“Sure. It’s very nice.”

You take a bite from the burger. It is quite nice. “It’s nice.”

“I know right? I like the pickles in it.”

Pickles… You… You don’t dislike them. You think they’re alright. Just okay. Nice, even. “They’re nice.”

“They’re quite nice.”

This evening is being nice, you think. That is, until Shinobu enters the Burger King, screaming at Kyoko why she didn’t invite her to chicken nuggets last time they were at Burger King (1987). Well, this isn’t very nice.

“I can explain: you were being a huge bitch.”

“How fucking dare you.”

They start fighting, throwing punches and kicking each other and all that shit. You tremble and melt onto the floor, not sure of what to do, especially when you’re a liquid now. You just watch the two fight and your body tries to become solid again but can’t achieve it.

…AH!

Just before Shinobu steps on you while biting Kyoko’s arm and eating your chicken nuggets, you wake up. Sitting on your bed, you ponder… You ponder about everything that happened in your dream and reach one conclusion…

Burger King is so fucking overpriced, what the fuck.