Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Lying under the twinkling stars in a dark and desolate ally way gives you a lot of time to think, one Yamazawa Izuku muses to himself. It's a lonely death he'll admit, dying alone in an alley way that smells like piss and blood, one unbefitting for a boy as purely good as the one crumpled against the unforgiving concrete. His friends, no his family are fighting a war a few streets over and by the time they find him it'll be too late, but the green eyed boy turns his gaze to the sky and can't help but smile. 

He has a lot of memories under the stars, hazy ones of his mama, ones with dad, papa and Eri, with his Toshi, and with his friends. The stars have always been a constant comfort to him. Mama used to say before she died that the stars were everyone who had died, just their souls still shining brightly and looking down on their loved ones. 

When he'd first been taken into the care of Aizawa and Yamada he'd lay across the window seat in the living room, gazing up at the stars and trying to discern which one was his mama. When his new daddy and papa discovered why he was so obsessed with the stars they'd take him to the rooftop of their apartment complex so he could have a more clear view of the breathtaking star clusters, the occasional shooting stars and so on. 

The boy grew to adore astrology, almost as much as he loved heroes. 

When he met his friends he'd take them out onto the rooftop of U.A (special privileges of being the son of two employees) and point out the constellations. He'd lay up there for hours with Tsu, Tenya, Ochako, Shouto and Hitoshi, the six of them talking about anything and everything as they gazed up at the sky, making wishes upon the shooting stars. 

Laying in the alley way, watching the stars above him, there was an odd sense of peace behind it. The acceptance of his own demise had settled deep within his bones, making his body feel 10x heavier than it truly was. Izuku always had a feeling he'd die young, whether he became just another quirkless statistic, or if it was at the hands of a villain like now. 

The fight itself had been pathetically quick. 

The first year heroic students had been called out because of a large scale attack being led by the League of villains, the city had been turned into a war zone, explosions and pained screaming echoed the boys ears as he ran beside his fellow Hero hopefuls. He'd been separated from his friends, his Toshi, and his parents, had followed a villain into an alley way like an idiot, and when push came to shove, the teenager had lost the fight. 

He couldn't remember much except the excruciating pain of a metal pipe lodging itself into his abdomen, and the guttural scream that had ripped his throat raw. A villain had left a fifteen year old kid to die alone in a dirty alley way, and said kid had come to terms with the looming beast of death. 

More than anything Izuku wished for his loved ones to be here, dying alone was terrifying, to feel the biting numbness spreading through his limbs, the coppery taste of blood on his tongue, the haziness along the edges of his vision, all of it was far too terrifying to go through alone; yet here he was, braving through it with a bitter smile. 

If he focused hard enough he could feel the phantom feeling of dad running his fingers through his hair, could feel papa gently rubbing his leg and could feel the soft barely there kisses against his face that Toshi loved to pepper against his freckles. 

A small sob bubbled up in his throat, but it only caused him to momentarily choke on his blood. God he wanted all of his family so bad, he wanted to hold Eri again, wanted to sit on the roof with his friends, to curl up against Toshi's side and watch a shitty movie with his dad and papa. 

Izuku was so scared, he was only a child facing the unforgiving void of death, the sound of ringing in his ears blocking out the shouts of his friends and family looking for him. 

Through teary eyes he looked up at the sky and tried to focus on the better memories he had, the ones that would chase away the looming beast. 

Hitoshi and Izuku were hanging out in the ladders dorm room, the two playing on their Nintindo Switch. Hitoshi was playing Stardew Valley while Izuku was playing Animal Crossing. Hitoshi could no longer play Animal Crossing around Izuku after the boy sent him absolutely foul looks over the state of his island, and when the boy thwacked him with a pillow when Hitoshi released a new fish he'd caught. 

The greenette hadn't spoken to him for five minutes until he'd gotten tickle attacked by his boyfriend, which resulted in Hitoshi's favorite symphony, Izuku's giggles. 

Since then Hitoshi refuses to play around his boyfriend, not wanting to be shunned for how he plays his game, nor did he want his boyfriend to bully him over how he completely ignored Blathers. In result, Hitoshi now plays Stardew Valley when they sit together and play on their switches. 

Izuku tipped his head to look over at the indigo eyed boy, a small smile spread across his lips. 

"So are you still trying to go after Sebastian?"  Hitoshi's lips split into a small smirk, heart fluttering at Izuku remembering such small details.  

"Absolutely, I know he'd treat me right. He's probably as useful as a limp noodle on the farm though." Izuku snorted, curling himself against Hitoshi's side, nose digging into the other teenagers neck. 

"Mhm as long as you don't replace me with a fictional character." He teased lightly, pressing a light kiss to a mole on Hitoshi's neck. 

"No one could ever make me as happy as you." Hitoshi replied instantly, dropping his switch to the side to curl his arms around Izuku's smaller form.

"And you would be an amazing helper on a farm, thank you very much." He pressed a kiss to the crown of the boys head, his smirk widening into a grin when he heard him giggle. 

"I love you Toshi." Izuku looked up at his boyfriend, a loving smile spread across his lips and eyes unbearably soft. 

"I love you too sunshine, more than you could ever imagine." Hitoshi replied, pressed a kiss to a freckle on the corner of the greenettes mouth. Another delightful giggle left the smaller boys lips and Izuku swore this was his heaven. 

Here in this room with no burdens pressing down on their shoulders, just them, happy and together. 

Izuku snuggled closer to Hitoshi's side, pressing another few kisses against his boyfriends shoulder and neck, eyes fluttering shut with a small sigh. When he felt Hitoshi's fingers run through his curls it was an instant KO and he was asleep before he knew it. 

Izuku's heart clenched painfully in his chest, numb hands uselessly trying to clench up at his sides. Kami he just wanted Hitoshi right now. He'd know just how to comfort him, he'd make silly comments that'd make his stomach hurt from laughing so hard. 

Green eyes fluttered under the light cast by the moon, a gurgled cry leaving his lips. Fuck he wasn't ready to die yet, he wasn't. He wanted to do more things with his life, he wanted more time, even if it was only long enough to say goodbye. 

He wanted to watch Eri grow, he wanted to see dad and papa get to retire from being teachers and from hero work, he wanted to see his boyfriend and friends retire, but that was never meant to be, the universe had long since made a tragedy of his life, and it seems his death was a fitting end. 

Izuku swallowed past the lump in his throat, eyes returning to the beautiful sky. Oh how he wished he could reach his arm out and touch the moon, touch the stars, maybe his mama has been waiting for him all this time. 

At least tonight is such a beautiful night out tonight, he wished he could've spent it on the dorm roofs with his friends, at least one last time. 

It had long since become a tradition for Izuku's friend group to sit on roof tops and gaze up at the stars. He'd tell them of the constellations, the stories behind them, they'd make childish wishes, up on the roofs, Japan wasn't on the verge of a war, they were just kids spending time together. 

Toshi rested his head on Izuku's stomach, with Izuku resting his head in Shouto's, who had his head in Ochako's lap, Ochako had her head on Tenya's shoulder, and Tsu rested her back against Tenya's. They tended to spend these nights like this, cuddled up together soaking up any affection they could get, trying to forget the horrors they see on the streets and on the news every day now. 

"Zuzu, could you tell us about another constellation tonight?" Ochako spoke up quietly. This day had been harder for them, the league had attacked a school bus of children and many hadn't made it. Tsu and Ochako had been on their work studies during that time. 

"Of course Ocha." Izuku replied, tone as soft as silk. His eyes turned up to the twinkling stars, a sombre smile on his lips. 

He pointed up in the sky, his friends gazes following his finger. 

"That one right there is Cassiopeia. It's said that Cassiopeia was a queen in Ancient Greece who boasted that her daughter's beauty was unrivaled. As punishment Poseidon, the Greek God of the sea made her into a constellation in the sky, because she proclaimed that her daughter was more beautiful than any of the Sea Nymths. Both her daughter and husband were placed next to her in the sky. She's forced to wheel around the north celestial pole on her throne, it was her punishment for angering the gods." 

As he spoke never did his voice raise above a gentle draw, tone light and kind. He ran his finger's through Hitoshi's hair as he spoke, eyes trained on one of the saddest constellations. 

"That's sad." Tsu croaked out quietly, leaning more heavily against Tenya. 

"Yeah, it is. Most constellations don't have happy tales. But when I look up at the stars I like to think that I'm not alone, that there's so many beings who love me that are watching over me and making sure I'm never lonesome, especially in my darkest moments." 

He heard one sniffle, and then another and next thing he knew the cuddle pile had been broken so Tsu and Ochako could lay across him, crying their hearts out. His arms immediately closed around them, soft words only meant for the three of them were lost to the wind. 

The rooftops had become a safe space for the friend group, a place where they didn't have to be on edge the entire time, they could let their guard down and just be children. 

The rooftops are what they needed most, and Izuku gave that to them. 

Izuku's bottom lip wobbled as his fingers weakly clawed at the ground. Kami what he wouldn't give to just feel the breeze in his hair, to hear Shouto's quiet chuckles, Hitoshi's dry comments, Tenya's scoldings, Ochako's excitable chatter and Tsu's gentle croaky laughter. 

His chest physically ached with the grief running through his veins, or maybe it was the metal pipe quite literally impaling him though his stomach, but he just wanted his family, that was it. 

That soft 'splat splat splat' of blood against the concrete was driving him up the wall and all he could do was try and focus on alley cats scraping it out a few alleys down. 

The greenette let out a wheezing cough, gasping for air as blood spluttered past his lips. 

He closed his eyes, wishing with every bit of his energy that his dad and papa were here. He just wanted his daddy and papa. Kami he wanted them and Eri so bad. 

It was the weekend finally, school had been long and it was towards the end of the semester so there was more homework than normal. All Izuku wanted to do was collapse on the couch in  dad and papa's apartment and play with Eri. 

The teenager stumbled into the apartment with a pathetic whine, alerting his parents and precious baby sister that he was home. 

The small pitter patter of Eri's feet alerted Izuku to her running towards him and he barely caught her in time, a wide grin spreading across his lips.

"Well hey there my sweet lil girl!" Izuku cheered brightly, twirling around to hear the adorable sound of his baby sisters giggles. 

"Zuzu-Nii! I've missed you!" The child said this like he hadn't seen her this morning. 

"I missed you too Munchkin!" Izuku cooed, nosing her cheek lovingly. He looked up when he heard the click of a phone camera, rolling his eyes playfully at papa's red teary eyes. 

"Papa we literally do this every weekend." He teased shifting Eri so she was resting  comfortably on his hip. 

"I know but my babies are so cute!" Hizashi cried out loudly, and was lovingly thwacked by his husband as the ravenette came stumbling out of the master bedroom. 

"You're all too loud." He complained, wandering over to the coffee maker. 

"You're like a grumpy old man." Izuku snickered, impressively only shivering minutely at the glare sent his way. 

"You want to play that game kiddo?" Amber eyes swam with mirth as he faced his two children. Eri's grin widened as she began to chant 'old man' on repeat. 

Izuku grinned widely, tipping his head to the side. 

"I don't know what an old man could do to me." He teased, letting out a shriek as his dad jumped at him and Eri, darting around the house like a bat out of hell. 

"Zashi help me!" In a dirty tactic the two parents trapped their children in the corner, Hizashi grabbing Eri and Shouta throwing Izuku over his shoulder. Both children ended up getting tossed on a king sized bed, parents looming over them with evil little smiles. 

"Zashi, you know what to do." 

"Wait, no no please-" Izuku was cut off with loud shrieking laughter as his dads fingers dug into his sides, wiggling and thrashing violently to get away from the hobo man. 

The apartment that night was filled with Izuku and Eri's shrieking laughter and playful taunts. 

Izuku's numb hand went to wrap around the wound, a whimper leaving his lips. 

Kami, it hurt so bad, he never knew something could hurt so bad. 

The stars looked like they were getting dimmer, but maybe that was just his eyesight. 

Izuku was sad to leave his family, unbelievably so, but he was happy he could finally see his mama again. With memories of those he loves playing through his head like a movie he let his eyes slide shut so he could finally find peace. 

The stars could only weep as they watched their beloved boy fall into the cruel jaws of death, just as his dad, Aizawa Shouta found him, a guttural 'Izuku!' ripping through the alley way. 

But it was far too late, and Yamazawa Izuku died with a smile on his lips. 

I'm coming back mama. 

I love you daddy. 

I love you papa. 

I love you Eri. 

I love you Shouto. 

I love you Tsu.

I love you Ochako.

I love you Tenya. 

One day we'll meet again in the stars. Look up at the sky and spot me if you can. 

Chapter Text

Shouta still couldn't get the feeling of his blood off of his hands. Every time he closed his eyes the sight of his baby boy's body sprawled out in a dirty alley way haunted him. 

They say a parent losing their child is the most painful thing you can emotionally experience, and anyone who hasn't lost their child will never know the pain Shouta is going through, but he has another child to look after; another child he can't fail. 

He had to look Eri in the eyes and tell her that her Zuzu-Nii wasn't coming home. He and Hizashi held her as she wailed and screamed for her brother to come home to her. He'll never be able to get over the look of understanding that crossed her face when she finally comprehended what Shouta meant. 

His Eri hasn't smiled since that night, and thats understandable, he and Hizashi haven't either. They've tried to be tough for their daughter, but seeing Izuku's body before his funeral was one of the hardest things Shouta has ever done, Izuku was always smiling and talking, and seeing him so still and silent didn't feel right, it wasn't right. 

Hizashi's wail still echoes in his head even now as he lies awake the night before Izuku's funeral. If only he'd been faster to find Izuku, if only he worked harder, there's so many if's and but's. 

Hizashi curled closer to his side, burying his nose into Shouta's shoulder, a small sniffle leaving the blonde. 

"I miss him so much Shou." His voice broke, and Shouta knew it was physically painfully because of his quirk. Shouta's eyes burned painfully from unshed tears as he buried his hand into his husbands hair. 

"I know baby, I miss him too." Shouta replied quietly, turning on his side so he could face the other. He moved his hands down to cup Hizashi's cheek, using his thumb to brush away a stray tear. 

"I like to think he's up in the stars looking down on us though." Hizashi cracked the tiniest smile at that, bottom lip wobbling dangerously. 

"Lets go to the roof yeah?" Shouta hummed in agreement and stood, his spouse at his side. Eri was out of her room the minute she heard their door open, sniffling quietly. Hizashi cooed quietly and picked her up. 

"Hey sugarplum. Daddy and I were gonna go up to the roof, do you wanna come with us?" The child didn't reply verbally, only nodding in response before tucking her head into her papa's neck. 

Shouta placed a hand on Hizashi's lower back and led the now family of three up to the roof, where blankets and pillows were still laid out from Izuku's last stargazing session. 

Hizashi settled Eri on the middle of the blanket and Hizashi and Shouta flanked her sides, curling around their sweet baby girl. 

Eri gazed up at the stars with sad, wide eyes, bottom lip wobbling before she pointed up at the sky. 

"I think that ones Zuzu-Nii." She whispered, and when Shouta looked up it was the brightest star in the sky tonight, twinkling down at them. Shouta felt his throat tighten, and smiled down at Eri. 

"I agree baby girl, I think that's Izuku looking down on us." He whispered delicately. Hizashi muffled a sob and pressed his nose into Eri's hair. 

"I think he wants us to know he's okay." Eri murmured, clutching onto her parents tightly, and Shouta felt his heart break a little bit more. 

He'd give anything to have Izuku here stargazing with them, and not them looking for him in the stars. 

When Aizawa told Hitoshi that Izuku had died, he thought it was a cruel joke. Surely someone as pure and kind as Izuku wouldn't be taken from the world this early, right? 

But life was cruel, especially to those so inherently kind. As much as Aizawa had tried to make sure it didn't happen, Hitoshi saw his body. He saw his sweet sunshines lifeless form, a massive hole in his stomach, but a small smile spread across his lips. 

It was so Izuku, to smile even when he died. 

That night Hitoshi curled up in Izuku's bed, cuddling a stuffed shark Hitoshi had won him at a festival, it had been his favorite stuffed animal. The whole dorm could hear his gut wrenching sobs, the kind of sobs where his entire body shook and his throat ached from his grieving wails. 

The world felt so dull without his sunshine lighting it up. Every day felt like a repetitive loop. Wake up, classes, training, go to Izuku's room, and fall asleep surrounded by his smell. 

A small part of him felt selfish not checking on anyone else, not checking on Aizawa, Yamada, Eri or their friends, but he could barely get himself out of Izuku's bed every morning, let alone have the energy to check on other grieving people 

The only reason this changed was because of a letter his sweet little Izuku left behind. He found it one day while going through the other boy's desk, it had been addressed to 'Moonlight.' and Kami how much he missed hearing that. 

Hey moonlight, if you found this letter it probably means I'm gone. 

I know you baby, and I know you'll spend your time alone and isolated while grieving me, but I don't want that for you. I want you to move on, I want you to be happy. 

The seven months I've had with you have been the happiest I've ever been, and I'll forever be thankful for that.

I want you to spend time with our friends, I want you to spend time with my family, I want you to live your life Hitoshi. 

Don't waste your life away grieving me okay? 

I love you so much Moonlight, forever and always. 

Look up into the stars and you'll find me watching you. 

With love, Your Sunshine. 

The next day Hitoshi went over to the Yamazawa household and held Eri as she cried. 

Aizawa and Yamada held him as he cried and mourned losing the love of his life. 

Tsu, Ochako, Hitoshi, Shouto and Tenya sat up on the dormitory roofs, each in different states. Ochako, Tsu and Hitoshi all had swollen eyes and wobbling lips, Tenya had silent tears tracking down his cheeks and Shouto was silent, his face would look apathetic if you didn't know him, but after being friends with Shouto for so long, all of them could pick out his tells. 

He kept clenching his fists into his sweats, jaw tightening and nose twitching as he held back tears. 

All of the friends were grieving Izuku, they all missed their personal piece of Sunshine. 

"Do you guys wanna hear about his favorite constellation?" Hitoshi asked quietly, head laid in Tsu's lap, who was silently playing with his hair.

"Yes, please." Shouto spoke up, voice weak and wobbly. 

"His favorite constellation was Orion. It's based off of the greek hunter Orion. Its one of the brightest constellations, it's why he's always loved it. Always told me that it had to be his mom because it was so bright." The indigo eyed boy gave a watery laugh, not bothering to wipe away his tears. 

"I feel like he's the sun. The sun's a star right?" Ochako asked quietly, her sniffles almost silent. 

"Yeah, it is. Izuku was our sun, it'd make sense for him to become the sun to watch over us." Tenya replied just as quietly. Hitoshi reached over blindly to gently squeeze their hands. 

"He'd be proud of us, I just know he would." His eyes remained on Orion, he could only hope that Izuku was with his mama again, shining right next to her. 

The rooftop stayed silent after that, the sound of sniffles and sobs was the only sounds echoing into the night. 

What was once an area so warm with the love Izuku had become so cold. 

But deep in all of their hearts, they knew he was looking down at them, watching and proud to see his family keep going.