Archive of Our Own ^beta

Kageyama stared at his smoothy drink which he now was lazily stirring with the straw. 

they all have decided to go to new cafe shop that has opened just a few months ago and they all eagerly agreed to go there after the practice. Today there was no school so after practicing they straight get to gather, their things and went there. 

That is how he found himself sitting between the fellow first years as they all chatted happily. 

 He was always like this, keeping quiet, sitting by himself he didn't have any friends to begin with, so he was totally surprised when Yamaguchi, Hinata and even tsukkishima came to him with the invitation. 

But as he glanced around and saw them happy with each other, he regretted his decision. 

He wasn’t as friendly as Hinata or Yamaguchi, even tsukkishima was good at talking to people, whereas he gets annoyed easily when people would just stare at him like he was some kind of freak. Maybe that’s why he did not have any friends, because he scares them off. 

He was sure that Hinata, Yamaguchi and tsukkishima are forced to be his friends because of volleyball. 

He didn’t have any friends in middle school either and that was fine, he has forced himself to stop wanting a single friend. He was fine with being lonely if that was what his life had destined. 

But after coming to karasuno, his resolve was broken, and everyone in the team was so friendly that he soon started longing for it. 

“Hey Kageyama?” someone yelled. He startled looking up, seeing that they were all waiting for him to respond. 

“Yeah?” he said eventually. They looked at him for a second before Hinata spoke. 

“We are going to the mall after this” he said. 

Kageyama looked at them, hoping they would invite him. 

“We have paid the bill, so don’t worry about that, see you tomorrow” Yamaguchi said gathering his things before smiling at him. 

Of course, they are not going to invite you, you idiot. A voice in the back of his mind said. They don’t have to deal with the selfish volleyball idiot outside the court also. He blinked twice before turning towards them, who were all gathering their things. “Yeah ok” he said slowly. “See you guys' tomorrow” and started Walking out of the café before them. 

Afternoon practice was always rough, and tiring compared to morning practice, not that he was complaining. He was currently sitting on the ground, his back to the wall near the entrance of the gym legs sprawled in front of him and sipping water. As he was thinking of producing some new strategies for him and Hinata for their quick attack, his eyes roaming around and seeing his team scattered around the gym floor very much enjoying the break they have been given. 

He smiled knowingly. This was the first time he was finally (though it took time) able to trust his teammates, though sometimes he still doubts himself whenever he sees all of them laughing and joking, like they belong together, while he sits there in the corner feeling miserable and unwanted amongst them. 

He shook his head, not wanting to be depressive in between practice, he has enough time at home to do that.  

He looked back up and saw his fellow first years were gathered in the corner away from the team and discussing something. 

He felt a pang of jealousy, watching them together, happy. While he was alone and sad.  

Was he that bad? Was it wrong of him to want a friend? He thought bitterly while he saw them. 

Maybe he really was not that type of person to be called a friend. 

With that thought he got up, took the volleyball near him, and goes outside the gym for some self-practice and …. to get some fresh air. 

Kageyama sat in his bed in his room, with his back to the headboard scrolling through his phone.  

It was the weekend, and his parents were on a business trip for a week and that means he will be all alone today. On his birthday that too. Again. Not that he was a huge fan of birthdays. Especially not his. After being disappointed in his childhood birthdays as far as he recalled he stopped hoping for anything good to happen. Especially today. His parents tried to cheer him up but after their failed attempts they stopped doing anything, leaving only simple wishes through messages.  

He sighed and flopped down on his bed rolling over on to his stomach. It was late, almost around lunch. He should probably make himself something to eat.  

He got up and started moving towards the kitchen when there was a doorbell. He tilted his head in confusion ‘was anyone going to stop by this afternoon’ he thought and moved towards the front door. 

As he opened the door thinking who would be there, but he definitely did not expect them. 

Hinata, Yamaguchi and tsukkishima. They were all standing there in normal outfits that means they are definitely not here to practice. And are they holding gifts??!! 

“wha- what are you guys doing here?” he finally asked still not removing his eyes from them. 

“We are here for you Kageyama!!” Hinata cheered as loudly as ever. 

“Are you really going to make us stand in this heat” tsukki said while fixing his glasses. 

“tsukki!!” whined Yamaguchi from his side and nudging him. 

“n - no, well u can come inside, my parents are not at home” he said slowly still not believing what was happening. 

They all made their way towards the stairs up to Kageyama’ s room.  

After making themselves comfortable on the floor there was a minute of silence before they all shouted, almost making Kageyama have a heart attack. 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAGEYAMA!!!” they all said in unison, basically Yamaguchi and Hinata did, while tsukki avoided eye contact and muttered something about being loud. 

Kageyama sat in shock, eyes wide and staring at them in disbelief.  

“Ho-how di-did u guys kn-know that to-today was my bir- birthday?” beating himself for stuttering right now. It happened whenever he was in shock or overwhelmed. 

They stared at him with a sad smile on their faces.  

“We didn't know until I checked the list of team members in the club room. Everyone's biodata was there except yours. Well, it was there but your birthdate was missing. Then I checked in the office and from there I got to know” tsukki said slowly. 

“Why didn't you want anyone to know, Kageyama?” Yamaguchi asked with a frown. 

“wel-l I didn’t think it was important?” his answer seems more to be like a question. 

“Well, it's our majesty’s birthday. How can it be not important?” There was no venom in his tone and Kageyama knew it was to lighten up the tense mood, but previous experiences made it hard for him to change his emotional state. 

“Yeah? Well, if it was so important then tell me why no one showed up on my 10th birthday. Tell me why no one wished me a simple happy birthday on all my previous birthdays? Tell me Why did it make me feel like my birthday was not important while everyone else was? Tell me why I am always alone on birthday?" Kageyama yelled, not bothering to stop the tears that were rolling down his cheeks. He did not want to cry and was vulnerable in front of his friends but the ache in his chest which he had buried deep down had now flared. 

He was crying so hard right now that he didn't know what was going on or who was hugging him and holding him tight. 

After he calmed down and came to his senses, he saw that he was being hugged by tsukki and he was whispering something like ‘it's okay’, ‘you're okay’ ‘I'm here’ which was oddly comforting. From his shoulder he could see Hinata and Yamaguchi sitting silently and observing the scene before them.  

After his breakdown came the utter embarrassment which he didn’t think before. He hid his face in the crook of tsukki shoulder.  

“Are you back with us now?” said tsukki after a few moments still hugging him. 

“Yeah...” he mumbled back. He pulled out of the hug and scrub his eyes to wipe the remaining of his tears. “sorry” he said after finding his voice. Not looking up from his lap. Embarrassed. 

“What are you sorry for bakegama?!!!” Hinata said with his usual tone, but he could sense seriousness in his voice. 

“You all have to see me like this!" he said looking at them. 

“You are an idiot, Kageyama!” to his surprise it was Yamaguchi who said this. 

He stared up at him with wide eyes.” I- I --”  

He didn’t get to finish before he was tackled on the ground by Hinata who was hugging him tightly. 

“You are not alone anymore Kageyama!!!!” he said loudly, still hugging him. 

Kageyama balanced his weight with Hinata still hugging him and sat up, returning the hug.  

He smiled. “I know now” he said slowly.  

They all smiled, now that Kageyama was feeling happy. 

“Now shall we cut the cake” Yamaguchi cheered happily before turning around and taking the cake out and lighting the candles. 

Hinata and Kageyama pulled out of their hug and settled themselves in front of the cake. 

“Make a wish bakegama!!” shouted Hinata.  

Kageyama closed his eyes and made a wish. After such a long time. 

Please don’t take away my friends  

He blew out the candles.  

After having a cake celebration and all was over, he finds himself looking forward to his coming birthday for the first time. He smiled. 

“Ok now open our presents” Yamaguchi cheered. 

This had Kageyama blinking in confusion. “Gifts?” he said slowly. 

“Did you thought that we will come empty handed on your birthday?” tsuki said from where he was sitting beside him. 

“it's your birthday Kageyama, you deserve some gifts” Yamaguchi said smiling at him. 

“HERE, first open mine!!” Hinata said, thrusting a gift wrap box towards him. 

“you guys don’t have t-to do this” he said while taking the box and stared at it for a little longer than intended. 

He doesn’t remember the last time someone gave him something much less a gift. 

He was so deep in thought that he didn’t realize that he was crying. Tears were rolling down his cheeks, but it was happy tears. He was so happy. 

Someone touched his cheek and he looked up to see tsukishima was wiping his tears with his thumb.  

“Why are you crying?” he asked. Tears were still rolling, and he was wiping them, not once hesitating. 

“No-nothing, just I don’t remember last t-time I got a present” he chuckled wetly. 

Tsukishima wiped his remaining tears and smiled. 

“it's okay, from today onwards u won’t feel this way.” he said smiling. 

“We are here for you Kageyama!!” both Hinata and Yamaguchi yelled. 

“Come on now open your gifts” Yamaguchi smiled. 

Kageyama smiled and opened Hinata's gift. Inside was a brand-new volleyball which he was planning to buy but he never had time.  

“Thank you so much for this Hinata, its perfect, I was planning to buy this but never got time” said smiling widely. 

“See I told you he would like that” he cheered. 

“Well since you both are volleyball idiots I can imagine” tsuki sneered from beside. 

“HEY!!” both Kageyama and Hinata yelled, offended. Yamaguchi laughed at their antics. 

“Come on, now open mine” Yamaguchi said while giving his box to him. 

Kageyama took it and opened it. Inside was a frame with all of his friends from karasuno, him, Yamaguchi, Hinata, tsuki and Yachi, it was a collage of all of the first years in the volleyball team. He didn't even remember when they clicked the pictures, but it was a memorable gift. Pictures of their first match, their training camp, their summer holidays practices and so much more. It was indeed a memorable gift. 

“I- I – thank you Yamaguchi it is perfect” he didn't know what else to even say, today has been really emotional for him. He wipes the tear in the corner of the eye. Looking at them smiling. 

“Glad you liked it Kageyama, although I was planning to give you something more special, but I didn’t find anything in the mall that you would find special. Then Yachi gave me this idea. It’s a gift from both of us, she was planning to come but she had some other work to complete” he replied sheepishly while rubbing the back of his neck. 

“n-no... It's perfect- wait what? Mall? As in that day when you all went together?” he asked wide eyes. 

“yeah the previous day only we got to know about your birthday so we planned to go to mall together to buy your gifts” Hinata replied smiling so wide is cheek might hurt. 

“Oh... and I thought that you guys didn't want me to be with you all” he said sheepishly, suddenly embarrassed. 

“We know that your past experience with friends was not the best, and you won’t be experiencing that again, you are stuck with us” tsukishima said a little embarrassed. Avoiding eye contact. 

“I know it will take time for you to start trusting us, but we are not going anywhere, neither are you, and we will make sure you trust us” Yamaguchi said and embraced him into a hug to show him his point. 

Kageyama returned the hug while smiling. He felt safe and loved.  

“Ok now cut the sappy stuff, and here open my present now” tsukishima said feeling awkward with all the emotional scene going on. 

“don’t say that when you were also saying those sappy stuff not a few minutes ago” Hinata said laughing. Tsukishima muttered something about being loud and brat. 

Kageyama took the gift from him and opened the box. Inside were brand new volleyball gear for hands and knees and medical tapes and also were volleyball shoes that were too of his favorite color. He gaped and looked at tsukishima. 

“tsuki-tsukishima these are so expensive, why did you buy this” still in shock. 

“Not that expensive, and I noticed that your gear and shoes have been torn so I just thought why not give something that you will use on a regular basis” he shrugged looking dead in his eyes. 

“I-I thank you” still a little shocked. He picked up the shoes and looked at them, it was so cool.  

“Ok now what that this is done, what should we do for the day” Hinata asked cheerfully. 

They started discussing what they would be doing for the day.  

Kageyama stared at them and smiled. He can be a friend to someone. 

He knew now that he was not alone. 

Maybe he can still hope to have more than one friend. 

Maybe he should give his life one more chance.  

He can still be happy.