Chapter Text
Loki’s hands gripped the control panel as the escape pod hurled through space. His blood pounded in his ears as he envisioned his revenge. He was focused and determined. He knew exactly what to do, but first he had to make it to his destination in one piece and pray that the legends were true, or all of this was for nothing.
He wanted this more than anything he had ever wanted, and his drive for redemption spurred him on. Loki, son of Asgard, was on a mission to avenge his people.
“Mehen.” He chanted like a spell through gritted teeth.
“The sun will shine, indeed.” He panted. “I will bring it down on us all if I have to.”
◇◇◇◇◇
“You have got to get out more, brother.” Thor slapped his little brother’s back, making him yelp and stumble forward.
Loki straightened up, rolled his eyes, and pulled a great leather-bound book from his bag.
“You’re out seeking glory, but I seek a far richer treasure.” Loki replied with a grin.
“What treasure is more bounteous than glory?” Thor groaned at the sight of yet another book his sibling plundered from the Asgardian archives.
Loki’s eyes darted up to meet his brother’s and he opened the tome to reveal the seal of Jörmungandr.
“Behold the World Snake!” Loki hissed excitedly as his eyes danced over the page and its alien hand written script.
Thor sighed and shook his brother’s shoulder in dismay.
“I love snakes, but this is bordering on mania, Loki.”
“You have your brawn, and I have my brain.” The boy said and smiled, but Thor frowned disapprovingly.
“Mother is mad.” Thor warned. “Well, not exactly mad, but she’s been pacing after dinner, which she hasn’t been eating much of.”
Loki frowned at the page and looked up at Thor with narrow eyes.
“You can’t make me feel bad this time, Thor. This was worth the deep-dive into the archives.” He replied with a sparkle in his eye as he snapped the book shut, shoving it back into his bag.
“I’m telling Mother you’re back.” Thor warned.
“Tell her.” He shrugged and hiked the bag back onto his shoulder. “Not like she doesn’t know where to find me.” The young prince sighed and turned on his heel to make his way through the palace back to his chambers.
When he finally made it to his room, he pushed the door open, tossed his bag by his his bed post, and ran for the tray of food left on his table. He hadn’t eaten a proper meal in days down in the archives and took the bait, not seeing the shadow that stood in the corner of his room, watching him.
“Loki?” He jumped and dropped the bread he had torn into and stepped away from the platter guiltily.
“Mother!” He gasped. “T-Thank you, My Lady-Mother, for your g-generosity.” He stammered trying to remember his etiquette tutelage and bowed.
“No need to practice honorifics on me, my son.” Frigga said dismissively.
Loki straightened up and looked sheepishly up at his mother.
“Did you find anything interesting?”
“No-”
“Don’t lie to me boy.” She interrupted with a sly smile and sauntered across the room toward the discarded tote.
“I-I found a book. It seems boring actually.”
Frigga narrowed her eyes as she zeroed in on Loki’s find.
“Mehen?” She spoke as she reached down to pick it out of the bag and flipped open the book. “I haven’t read this since I was a girl.”
“Mehen?” Loki’s face twisting with confusion. “I thought it was Jörmungandr, the World Snake?”
Frigga smiled as she flipped through the book.
“It’s called many things, son.” She said absently. “The Ouroboros, The Leviathan.” She said and her voice trailed off. “But mostly we just called it Mehen.”
“Are you okay, Mother?” Loki asked when he saw her begin to tear up.
She shook her head, silently scolding herself for getting emotional and set the book on the table.
“I read this long ago when I was learning magic.” She replied and sat in a chair. Loki slowly sat in the chair next to her and looked at her cautiously. Frigga saw her son’s apprehension and waved a laurel branch into her hand and passed it to her son as a symbol of peace between them. Loki took it with a tight smile, glad to see his mother smile back.
“I didn’t know such things interest you. I thought you were all about wargames and strategies, like your brother?” She teased.
Loki shrugged, knowing magic and lore was more of a woman’s study, but he was fascinated by his mother’s abilities.
“I figure if I can’t be as strong as Thor, perhaps I could be smarter?” He shrugged and eyed his bread as his stomach growled loudly.
“Do you really want to learn the old magic?” Frigga asked, her eyes narrow as she gave Loki a playful, sideways glare.
“If you’d teach me, I will learn.” He said as solemnly as he could and nodded slowly.
“I will speak to your father.” She stood from the table and turned to leave.
“Eat and read.” She called back, but the prince remembered something he wanted to say and stood to try and catch her hand but-
◇◇◇◇◇
“Mother!” Loki jolted awake forgetting where he was. His heart raced as he gained his bearings once more. He panicked and scrambled up to check the ship’s flight path, making sure he hadn’t overslept, or an errant limb hadn’t knocked anything out of place and him off course. He sighed with relief and leaned back when all was clear.
His dreams of the days when he first learned of the Mehen were becoming more vivid. He could still taste the bread in his mouth. Eat and read. His mother’s words repeated in his head and his stomach growled.
"Shit."
He stood up and searched the pod for a rations supply, tearing open the compartment and pulling out the vacuum sealed meals one by one, reading the labels to make an edible selection.
Eat.
After not finding any thing that sounded particularly appealing, he settled and tore one open greedily and began to devour whatever strange goo within the pouch was, and grabbed a second that seemed a little more solid.
Read.
When he finished the first pouch, he reached out and his book of choice appeared from green sparks of magic; a book of alchemy and enchantments from the vast archives of Asgard he plundered those many eons ago with all the information on the Jörmungandr he could ever find.
He was pretty certain if the book wasn’t full of charms and spells that it would have fallen apart by now from use. Still, he poured over the volume again for most likely the billionth time as he noshed on the other bag of something that tasted of eggs, but was the texture of beef.
The power of the World Snake was so close. So close he could taste it. He craved all of that power to be in his hands and he planned to use it righteously.
◇◇◇◇◇
More sleeping, more eating, physical training twice every 24 hours, and of course, reading. Loki kept up the routine like a man obsessed, but it was his dreams that made it bearable. He had lost more than what an Asgardian should have at his age. His mother, his father, and his people, but there in his dreams, they were still with him. That was until he began to feel the pang of guilt at how many people he caused to suffer in his own enraged need for control and under the control of Thanos himself. He roared and slammed his fists into the rations compartment a few times to punish himself and slammed his back into the metal wall behind him. He stood again and screamed.
“I’m a fool! A tyrant!” He yelled into the void. He turned to kick something, anything, but caught a glimpse of himself in the reflection of the heads up display, all pale and gaunt like a ghost, withering away from shame, and guilt, going mad from isolation. He sank down to the floor and cradled his head in his hands.
“I am nobody.” He groaned. “Why am I even doing this? No one will accept me, not now. I am irredeemable.” He picked up the book and looked listlessly down at the mottled leather. “I am a monster.” He whispered.
Suddenly, all his rage possessed him and he tore the book's cover off its spine as he howled in anguish until his throat was raw. He dropped book and cover at his sides and letting his head fall back, exhausted from his outburst. At first he thought he was hallucinating, but a leaf of parchment twirled and twisted above him until it came to light on his forehead. He snatched the paper from its landing point and craned down to look at the image illustrated on it.
"And where did you come from?" He muttered as he inspected it.
An enchanted illustration of two snakes intertwined with each other, one black, one white, writhed slowly together with the words, “all is one” written in his mother’s own hand on the page below the image.
“All is one.” He said aloud. “All is one… but there are two?”
He gave the page an investigatory sniff and turned it over a few times before he stood. He paced slowly up the ramp to the cockpit, never looking away from the image carefully crafted by some ancient artist or perhaps Frigga herself?
“All is one.” He breathed and propped the page on the control panel.
“All is one.”