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A Nightmare Before Christmas

Summary:

‘Tis the season, and it’s about to run red when Edward returns for a dinner and a movie. If that wasn’t enough, there was something going on with Teddy; and being a human servant to his vampire sweetie, Jean-Claude, isn’t easy. Especially when you have to divide nights, deal with the added complications of the Thronnos Rokke and the Blood Drinkers Clan, and somehow Micah fits in there too. Merry Christmas Harry and Happy Hunting!

Readers of Anita will know what this film is. We shall warn ahead of time for triggery content. But as it is a huge plot point we can’t skip it or give spoilers.

Warnings: Slash: M/M/M Pairing, Harem, Strong Sexual Content, Language, Some Gore, Violence, Wolves being wolves, Weresex, Watch for warnings at chapter starts, Some AU mixed elements of both Harry Potter and the Anita Blake Series, Drama!

Book Four: Lunatic Cafe

Notes:

Welcome Readers to the 4th in our series!

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Chapter Text

She had to be mad. 

No way she could be serious. 

Just no

Her big brown eyes were now getting wider and Harry moved along the kitchen focusing back on his dusting. He was pretending the woman wasn’t standing there at the end of his well polished table after the breakfast fiasco this morning. 

He had way more things going on than dealing with that idea. He looked away from the shiny reflection staring back at him. 

Lately, his little Teddy Bear had been acting out. It started about two week ago when he awoke Harry by screaming at the top of his lungs. Of course, Harry had gone in with every piece of weapon in his house ready to shoot whatever was touching his precious boy until he realized that Teddy was still asleep and had ripped his covers to shreds. His hair had turned violent vivid colors cycling through black, red, and even livid purple so deep that it looked like bloody red. 

He’d had to wake his godson and when he did...

Ouch!

He’d been bit to the point of drawing blood. Of course, once Teddy became aware of what had happened, he’d proceeded to snuggle and cry in Harry’s arms for a good three hours. A few times he had also woken to find Teddy snuggled in bed with him and whomever had stayed after sex. Harry hadn’t yet figured out if it was Teddy coming in; or Edward or Micah noticing something wrong, grabbing Teddy, and bringing him back. The first time it happened he freaked out over the mess in the bed and what Teddy must smell in the room. He hadn’t calmed down until Teddy commented on how comforting it was for their scents to mix so that he wasn’t empty and alone. Micah had stuck around the last few weeks and was in his bed about as often as Edward or Jean-Claude.

He hadn’t told Hermione and Draco about any of this as he didn’t expect them to understand and he didn’t want them treating Teddy differently. He figured it was growing pains or nightmares from Halloween or something and that it would work itself out. But, this morning the child had been nodding off into his plate of puppy shaped pancakes and scrambled eggs when he bolted straight up out of nowhere. The plate and food went whizzing around the room before coming to a smashing end against the stone wall. His hair had changed again from its natural shade of brown that he wore to school to a livid red. 

Hermione had stayed over at Richard’s last night and Draco was still under the deep pile of silk sheets in his room after a grueling round of exams that had left him knackered. 

What was the most startling of all was that this morning, Teddy didn’t remember anything after he’d calmed down and his hair went back to brown. Harry tried to gently poke and prod, and ask if he was having nightmares, but the child just shook his head and then ran off. Harry didn’t know what to do about it and so he kept an eye out as much as possible. He feared leaving him alone these days. 

It was about two weeks before Christmas. Harry was excited, despite all the issues with Teddy. He was going all out on Christmas, and Rafael and a few others had promised to come over later that week to help him get the house all decorated. 

It was only too bad that Draco would leave Christmas Eve for his parent’s place. Hermione was staying in America. She’d found her footing and with her budding relationship with Richard Zeeman, she was a lot more rosy and cheerful lately. Draco still teased her endlessly and Hermione still hexed his bollocks black and blue, but the camaraderie in the house was the same. It was full of life; and the happiness would be overflowing if Harry didn’t worry about what was going on with Teddy. 

But, now, Hermione had come to him in her gaggle of excitement and proposed the worst idea in the world. 

“Please!” Hermione’s voice spread through the room, bouncing off the walls of the kitchen, and even the pots and pans that gleamed above his stove. 

“Merlin, Hermione, I can’t!” 

“Why not? It’s not like you don’t have choices.” 

Harry spluttered and he sighed as he looked at Hermione. “Did you really just say-?” 

Hermione folded her arms over her chest. “Please?”

“No!” 

“Harry!” Hermione stomped her foot like a twelve year old. 

“Don’t teach Teddy that.” 

“He’s at school.” 

“Thank Merlin,” Harry breathed as he turned his back. “Hermione, I - I don’t know why you think that’s a good idea.” 

“What’s so wrong about a double date?” 

Double date. Harry thought she was mad. “We’re not sixteen! And you know what’s wrong with a double date? I don’t have a date in the first place!” He tossed the rag into the sink. 

“Bull, Harry! You have three men, three! And from what I hear there’s sometimes a fourth! I have been very good about your odd relationships. I figure, it’s okay, you’ve never really experimented before.”

“Experimented?” Harry narrowed his eyes at Hermione, surely she wasn’t about to lecture him about who he slept with or how many. 

“You deserve to experiment a little, but when I see Micah leaving your room naked at six thirty in the morning and the next day Edward wanders out of your room… I start to wonder Harry!” 

“Edward is always dressed,” Harry defended.  

“That’s not the point!” Hermione cried out in exasperation. 

“Then what is your point, Hermione?” Harry sighed. “Considering even if I was up for it, the only person that I could see going on a real date is Jean-Claude. But as Richard growls and snarls every time they get in the same room together, I don’t think that’s a good idea. Micah and I are great friends with a few benefits, and Edward? I can’t even imagine a date with that man. So, no, Hermione. I don’t really have the options like you insinuate.” 

Hermione huffed. “It’s not that he hates Jean-Claude. Richard just hates the way he controls him, and I don’t blame him! It’s wrong, and I don’t like the fact that you’re a vampire’s human servant! I know what that means, Richard told me everything that it entails. You are his human to call. He can control you, Harry!” 

“Our relationship isn’t like that, and because of my magic and necromancy blood, he doesn’t control me. I can always say no to him.” 

“Yeah right,” Hermione snorted. “Since when? If you say no, I’ve heard he crawls on top of you and seduces you into sex in front of whoever you said no in front of!” 

Harry’s face burned as he turned and gathered the clean dishes to put up the old fashioned muggle way. “That’s not entirely true. I said no the other day when he asked me to join him at Guilty Pleasures and he didn’t seduce me into saying yes.” But, he almost did, Harry didn’t say. 

“I also heard how possessive he gets.” 

“He’s not that bad, considering you do see Micah coming out of my room butt-naked,” he reiterated. “Besides, it’s not as if I can’t say no when I want to. It’s mostly that whatever it is, it’s just not important enough to get into a slam-dunk fight over! He’s also trying to get control of his community and if that means he has to sometimes order me around then that’s fine. I’d rather him do that than some new big arse master coming through the town trying to take over! Also, what is Richard on about? Jean-Claude asks for nothing but his attendance only when there’s someone really important coming in and he needs an alpha wolf at his side. Do you really think Stephen is alpha material? Or Jason?” 

“No…” Hermione huffed. “But, why can’t you ask Micah? Richard likes him!” 

Truth was, Micah wasn’t allowed to go far in St. Louis unless Jean-Claude approved of it. Also Micah made it clear he had no taste for Richard. Harry hadn’t asked why, but the feelings were definitely not mutual. Harry didn’t know why. Micah was able to go back and forth from Harry’s to the Circus, but that was it. He always had to be accompanied by a vampire, someone on their side, or Harry. Harry had wanted to ask about it, but didn’t think it was his business. If Micah wanted him to know, he would tell him. 

“Micah is only a really good friend, Hermione. My relationships these days are a little on the complicated side and I’m sorry I can’t double date with you-” 

Rafael! ” Hermione exclaimed suddenly. “He’ll go! I know he will.” 

Harry just stared at her without blinking. “No! Is that who you meant when you said ‘fourth’? Rafael and I are not - together. Nor have we had sex!” 

“But, he’d go?” 

“Why do you need me to go with you? What is so important?” 

Hermione looked away, her cheeks staining. “Last night we nearly had sex and I’m not ready for that. So I figure, if you go with me tonight, I can go home with you?” She said it so fast that Harry wasn’t sure if he heard her right. It all came out as babble. 

Harry blinked this time and then he blinked again. “You want to use me to cock-block him?” 

Hermione let out a sound as she threw her hands up in an effort to cover her face from the burning embarrassment. “Harry! I hate the way you say that!” 

“You are the strongest woman I know, Hermione, and from what I know about Richard, he’s the perfect man. A gentleman, a boy scout! Not to mention, from the rumors, he’s pretty endowed.” 

She glared at him. “Shut up! I know how endowed he is,” she spluttered, “-and it’s not about saying no and being stronger. It’s that when I start to get closer, it’s hard to push him away or stop!” She was moving her head around and making faces with her mouth as she toed the ground. “But, if you were there it wouldn’t go that far because you know, we’re not into the public scene like you would be.” She said in such a bland and easy going way. 

Harry bristled, who did she think he was? “Like me? I have never done it in public!” 

“Not what I heard.” 

“Jean’s office is not public.” 

“It is with everyone hearing!” Hermione quipped. “Apparently, you scream really loud.” 

“You’re not helping your case,” Harry bit out in a soft snarl. 

“Please, Harry?!” She had resorted to begging. 

If truth be told, Harry wasn’t entirely sure what all these men were to him. Most of them came and went, and he always went to Jean-Claude when called. She wasn’t entirely wrong about the human servant to call part, but he wasn’t about to let her think differently if only to save face and his dignity. 

He sighed. He was too tired to fight. “How about I go as the rubbish third wheel? I’ll go with you, but not with a date.” 

“But, that’s not really fair to you,” she said, tilting her head and considering it. 

“It doesn’t matter. I’m used to life being unfair,” said Harry with a smile that showed his teeth. “What time? Someone better be paying because I don’t feel like it tonight.” 

Her eyes lit up. “Really? It’s a production of Guys and Dolls! It’s going to be brilliant! You’ll really go?” 

“...” Harry looked at her flatly. He rubbed his forehead. “Yeah. I’ll go!” She ran at him with a hug, squeezing the life out of him in the process. 

“Yes! It starts at seven!” She beamed as she spun and ran out of the room, causing Harry to flop down in a nearby chair and glare at his shiny table. Guys and Dolls? It was so not something Harry would ever want to see. Who in the world thought of this? Hermione? Surely, not Richard? 

“Looks like I’m going to be home with Teddy tonight,” Draco said with a smirk as he walked in.  

“Dammit. You want to go on a date with me?” 

“No!” Draco squawked. “Who would watch Teddy? Besides, I don’t care much for Richard. He’s too rigid.”

“Damn. I don’t want to be a third wheel.” Harry waved his hand, smiling slightly as a fresh plate of food that had been under preservation floated in front of Draco. “It’s puppy pancakes, hope you like.” 

“You shouldn’t have,” Draco smirked. “I don’t understand why you think things are complicated. Just take Micah or say who cares what Richard thinks and take Jean-Claude. He’d probably be into that kind of thing.” 

Harry sighed. “I - don’t know. Something is going on with Micah. He can’t really go to public spaces. I don’t know why. I haven’t asked. Eh, it won’t matter. Just a couple hours right? It can’t hurt.” 

Draco snickered. “You sound as if you are going to your death.” 

“No, Death isn’t this cruel, Draco,” said Harry, rising and scratching his elbow. “I have to get dressed and go and see how many useless clients I get today. Merlin, I can’t believe I’m wishing for a busy night of raising. It’s like everyone gets so holier than thou this time of the year!” 

Harry stretched his arms into the air and shook his head. He set out the one and only coffee mug that was different from the color coordinated ones. The only reason Draco wouldn’t dare mention throwing it away, was because Teddy had made it in his art class. It was a deep green with a series of holiday Christmas lights spiraled around it, and a lot of badly but cutely made white snowflakes. Bert had wanted them to bring in a personalized Christmas mug. He supposed he’d make his boss happy this once. It was the season after all, he thought as he trudged off upstairs to get dressed. 

He chose a hunter green turtleneck that sat nice and snug against his frame. It was the time of the year again for all the jumpers and bulky clothes one could pile on to keep themselves warm. A cold chill had brewed through St. Louis, and a sparkle of frost began to coat the grounds and rails of the large city. He chose a shimmery not quite black, more of a gray/silver, pair of tailored slacks that had been personally tailored to him thanks to Jean-Claude. He was sure that his wardrobe had now expanded to the point of no return in the last five months. 

He slipped into the dragon-hide boots, smirking as he thought about the pair he had custom ordered from Romania for a certain sociopath. It was going to be the perfect Christmas present for him.

The Circus of the Damned was downright frigid underground. No surprise considering lycanthropes already had high as hell temperatures, and vampires didn’t really feel cold or hot like Harry and all the other silly humans. Therefore, Harry had taken to buying and leaving sweaters for himself there.

Although, Dolph had his doubts these days about his human side. He had tried hard to be honest with the man only to have him being looked at harder. He had not only closed the case on the vampire pack attacks, but he’d supplied the coroners and historians of St. Louis with a million year old vampire that predated the humans of today. One would think he would get a thank you for a job well done. But, like the magical world, some things were simply too weird for the muggle world to understand even with supernatural nuances open and public. Harry surviving a fatal stab to the stomach and chest was one of those things. 

At least, Jean-Claude’s place as Master of the City had strengthened overnight. 

Harry stepped into the bathroom and frowned as he ran his fingers through his wild hair. It seemed to other people that his hair was becoming more black and untamed. It stood up in thick shiny layers and never in the same place at the same time. It didn’t know how to be good. His eyes no longer needed the glasses that he had become used to. His face didn’t look much different except maybe sharper than when he was younger. But really, everyone became thinner as they lost the baby fat growing up, unless they were like Dudley and ate everything in sight.

He didn’t have Micah’s delicate triangular features. In his mind, Harry was the normal plain man with a bit of a flare in his eyes, and way too much hair that should probably be trimmed, but Harry wasn’t bothering. He was also obscenely pale, enough for people to wonder if he had some vampirism in him somehow. Lying on his neck glimmering in the soft bathroom lighting was a black fur-lined torc with a diamond encrusted JC where the ends met in the front. It was Jean-Claude’s way of showing ownership over Harry. For all to know when he walked down Riverfront, that he belonged not only to Jean-Claude, the master vampire, but Master of the City. 

Edward on the other hand had taken a more permanent approach. A small 1 inch by 1 inch ice blue flame covered scythe made of bone had been tattooed into his skin. It was small and unassuming, but it spoke volumes for anyone who caught a rare glimpse of it. Yeah, Harry had been owned in every way possible. 

He grabbed his belt and double checked the weapons along with the black thigh holster that lay invisible to all normal eyes. He finished with a thin black leather coat that tied in the front. Bert would be displeased, he didn’t like black in the office, but tough. He was already wearing trousers out of his comfort zone. 

It helped that he looked dressed for the stupid musical thing he had to attend this evening. He scowled as he grabbed his rucksack. 

Harry knew he had an issue saying no to people he cared about. He’d always had that issue and jumping across the pond to America hadn’t changed it one bit. He tended to figure that it wasn’t worth fighting over. 

It was nice to be needed. It wasn’t like Harry needed anything and giving was part of his nature. Harry ignored the strange feeling in his stomach as he waved good-bye to Draco who handed him a coffee mug full of fresh coffee. He sipped it as he stepped out into the blistering cold morning. 

Just like he expected, the frost was clinging to the spindly empty trees, rails, and the ground. It made everything feel stiffer, particularly his car and the leather seats. All of the sky was a sheet of gray. Not a bit of sun to be seen and the clouds looked flat. Is this what they term a gray sky morning in America? He wasn’t sure. 

It wasn’t more than a few hours later that Harry was slouched in his seat, his face set in a small scowl as the last useless client walked out his door. 

What the hell? He was not a magician for hire! What the bloody hell had Bert been advertising to get these morons in here? He’d also gotten very illegal and unsolicited requests to kill a vampire or two all because his name and picture had been plastered across the newspapers of him pinning a million year old vampire down. Even ones claiming he was slaughtering a so-called immortal creature.

The Circus of the Damned had seen publicity like it never got before, and in turn so had Harry and Animators. Bert had been thrilled and fully forgave him for being unable to fill his quota of Halloween entertainment. Highlights of the Fight for St. Louis had filled the paparazzi with enough stories that it was still making headlines. Maybe not front cover, but there was always something slipped in.  

It wasn’t like he stabbed Mr. Oliver! It wasn’t like he did anything special except survive something that should have been impossible! Anyone would survive if given enough reason to. He had tried to remind them that it was fake, but hardly anyone believed it. It looked too real. No way it could be an illusion right? 

Harry didn’t want attention. He didn’t want publicity. He wanted to stay out of it. He was fine where he was hidden in the shadows. Merlin forbid if someone else over there recognized him. 

He spaced out for some time and thought about just up and leaving during his late lunch hour to get Teddy when his phone rang. He lifted it lazily. “Hello?” 

“Harry!” 

Harry’s eyes shut as he sank deeper into his seat. “Hermione.” 

“So glad I got a hold of you! I’ve already got Draco seeing Teddy off the bus!” 

Harry frowned. “That wasn’t necessary.” 

“Sure it is! You’re still coming right?” 

“Mhmm, it’s what I agreed to, isn’t it?” he asked, feeling a tight sensation in the pit of his stomach.  He leaned forward and brushed a hand over his forehead. “Really, Hermione, do you need me for this?” 

“I do! I really do. Richard doesn’t mind. It’ll be so much fun! You’ll love it. Richard is the one who got us a handful of tickets. If you want you can still call Rafael and ask him to go with you! Richard likes him and thinks he’s an honorable man.” 

By now Harry was trying to rub a pulse of irritation out of his forehead. “No. I’m fine going alone. It doesn’t bother me none. It’s not like I really want to see this thing.” 

“Now, Harry! You never know until you try it.” Harry didn’t need to try it to know that it wouldn’t be his thing. He’d gone to a play once and that was to see a client. It was the worst two hours of his life. Okay, maybe not the worst, but it was close. “You should get out and experience new things! Maybe it’ll give you some perspective, you know?” 

“For what?” 

“Nothing, nothing! So, got a pen? I have the directions here.”

“Hermione, I’ve been living here since I was nineteen. I know my way around. Just tell me the theater.” 

Not long after he hung up, he dropped his head forward in a Dobby style fashion. “Merlin, what is wrong with me?”  A tap at his closed door had Harry’s eyes narrowing as he straightened. “Yes?” he asked tightly. 

“Busy?” John Burke poked his head in. “It’s almost lunch. You want to grab something at Mabel’s?” 

Bloody Hell. John Burke swept into the room, tall, dark and utterly handsome. He was even more so now that he got rid of that goatee. His hair was as black as his own, but it was smooth and silky going back and down his neck in a small tail with only a thin strip of white in the middle. He had nice hands and a good body if what Harry had noticed while passing him by in the halls was any indication. Harry didn’t look much, if at all. 

Honest! 

John Burke was also a vaudun practitioner and very straight. Harry hated vaudun, but right now he hated the idea of going to a musical as a third wheel even more, so the man was getting a pass. It wasn’t John’s fault that he was feeling trapped. He was also very straight according to him and everyone else in the office. Harry just happened to be his one exception due to their supposed connection, and John Burke having seen him raise an entire graveyard to eat a couple enemies. 

Yeah. Harry had a hard time calling him John or Burke in a separate way. It felt so very personal and Harry didn’t know why. 

Harry was about to say no, but looking down at the large leaflet calendar under his folded hands showed he had another appointment at five o’ clock. If he didn’t go for lunch now, he’d become a prime target for Bert to foster more useless clients on.

“Yes.” John’s dark eyes lit up and Harry resisted wincing. He should not be giving this man any sort of hope. Harry had more than enough to deal with. 

Normally, Harry would say no unless they were going with a group of other animators so that it wasn’t awkward. This was the first time Harry had said yes to the man when it would just be the two of them. 

“You look festive today. I like the mug. Let me guess, Teddy?” John asked with a sly smirk as he lifted it. 

“Yup. I figure I’d give Bert something. He’s already eyeing my leather jacket like it’s made of something rubbish.” He slipped it on as they walked out together. 

Just like everyone else beyond maybe Micah and Hermione, John towered over him. He was like a great big shadow as they walked together across the carpeted floors to the elevator that sat empty. “How many morons did you get?” 

“Two. It seems I’m not as popular as you are,” John teased as they stepped into the silver box together and he mashed the down button. 

Harry made a noise. “Bert’s fault entirely, and I will be having words with him before I leave.” He leaned against the back wall of the elevator in a slightly slouched position. He didn’t think John knew how to slouch. His head was always raised high. “I can’t believe I miss raising something.” 

“You and me both.” 

“How’s your sister-in-law?” 

“Getting on,” said John. His face didn’t show it, but his eyes seemed to wince and crinkle slightly, setting off the deep brown hue in them. Harry chose not to notice at all. 

“And the kids?” He was most interested in how the children were doing. 

“I managed to get them into the season by taking them to New Orleans last week. It’s fantastic this time of year. You ever been?” 

“A couple of times, mostly passing through and never around Christmas. I’m excited though,” said Harry grinning. “My first Christmas with Teddy.” 

“Well, New Orleans has more than Mardi Gras you know. You can walk down the streets and everywhere you look its lights, garland, and festive foods during the Christmas season.” 

“Sounds nice.” It made him think of the magical world and Hogwarts this time of the year. “Christmas used to be one of my favorite holidays when I was in school.” 

Mary was still sitting at her station talking on the phone to someone and jotting down notes. She waved at them with a big smile as John held the door open for him. 

John talked about New Orleans and their festivities all the way to Mabel’s. Harry didn’t mind for a change. John seemed almost lighter on his feet. He had no coat on, just a nice form-fitting cream colored jumper that emphasized the athletic frame and he wondered how the man wasn’t shivering as he snuggled down into his own jacket.

Harry told him about the school he attended. The castle and how they’d use real live fairies to sit in the trees that were so tall you couldn’t see the top. Especially the candles that would float on the ceiling. 

John was intrigued and they were soon sitting in a back-booth sharing a plate of cheese fries as they talked about which holiday song was annoying them more. 

“If I hear Winter Wonderland one more time in any variant, I’m going to shove a Winter Wonderland up my house-mate’s arse.” 

John snorted. “You should try Rudolph. My niece and nephew love it, and I don’t. I’d use Rudolph as a sacrifice in a summoning if I could get away with it,” he said, flashing a hint of teeth as he grinned. Harry laughed despite how macabre it sounded. He had no room to talk these days. 

Why couldn’t John be more irritating? Harry thought watching the way his strong jaw and nice lips moved as he continued to speak. He might or might not have drowned the voice out. It was too cultured with a slight tinge of Orleans style accent. 

It wasn’t like he liked the guy. Actually, John Burke irritated the hell out of him in a way he couldn’t describe. It might have been his holier than thou attitude during the Salvador fiasco or the fact that John still had some of his magic coasting through his system along with vaudun. He also at times got a bit touchy with Harry. Not in a harassment sort of way, but it was like John would take any opportunity to put his hand on Harry’s arm or shoulder. Just a pat or a casual brush. 

Whatever Jean-Claude did to him that night that kept him from speaking too many truths in open areas must have addled his brain. That was it. It was Jean-Claude’s fault. Harry had his own silent issues with that man these days.

Harry shook his head, not realizing he’d done it physically rather than mentally. “What’s wrong? Did I say something? You have an irritated expression on your face.” 

“I am irritated, but not at you. I feel like I’m being pulled in a hundred directions these days. I don’t know what anyone wants out of me. It’s frustrating!” 

“Well, why don’t you tell me the latest issue? Maybe I can help.” 

Harry doubted it. “My childhood friend, she’s come to live with me. And while she is brilliant, great and I love her to bits, I’d like to take duct tape to her mouth at times. She’s manipulated me into going to see a stupid musical! She wanted me to do a double date, but I don’t have a date! So, now I am going to be that creepy weird man that always lingers in films between a couple! I don’t want to be him and I don’t want to see a bloody musical. I hate those things, so boring! Give me something to kill.” He blinked at this, realizing how very Edward he sounded. 

He admitted to missing Edward. Edward only wanted him to be his best. He didn’t ask for too much more, except on surfaces face down or on his back. 

John let out a thick chuckle that caught in his throat as he reached for the ice water. “How about I go with you?” 

It took all of a second for Harry to realize what the man had asked or said or what-have you. “You?” 

“Is there something wrong with me?” 

A lot of things, Harry thought, feeling a bit weird now. “No. Of course not.” My how the lies keep coming! “Just a bit surprised.” 

“You shouldn’t be. Besides, it’s either I try and intrude on this interesting dilemma you have or I go home and watch Rudolph with my niece and nephew for the thousandth time since Thanksgiving.” 

“Ouch.” Harry actually felt for him. At least Teddy had a variation of interests. Lately, it has been Nightmare Before Christmas. He loved Jack Skellington. In fact, Harry was sure that Teddy had a crush on it, him, the corpse? Harry wasn’t sure what you’d classify that animation thing as, he’d have to ask Draco. 

Merlin, Draco was becoming more muggle than him, but then Draco didn’t have a master vampire sweetie with a sociopath as a side dish, and a leopard man as desert. What would John be considered? A topping of many flavors? 

Fuck, he did not go there. 

“You worked that one too well, John. I don’t think I could say no if I wanted to.” John grinned. He thought about it as he lifted the spoon and tapped it idly on the table. “You really want to go to this? Don’t tell me you have a thing for musicals?” 

“Not really, but like I said. It beats the alternative.” 

Well, it wasn’t like Harry had to do anything, and if Hermione could use him as a stopper, he could use her just the same. Though Harry was sure nothing would happen between him and John. He wasn’t going there.

Harry was beginning to get tired of playing the Yes boy these days. Whenever Jean-Claude called, he ran. Whenever Draco needed something to eat, he was there. Whenever Hermione badgered him enough, he gave in because she was very good at brow beating the daylights out of him. 

No one ever came to him without a reason except maybe Micah who seemed to need an escape from the Circus that he seemed bound to way too often for a healthy man. 

It must have been a shocking day; because Harry smiled and agreed to take John Burke with him. As if Harry didn’t have enough men in his life he had to go and add another one. 

Merlin help him. Or is that Death these days?