Chapter Text
The road was empty and dark as you drove back to your hometown. You’d left Lawrence after high school to pursue a career journalism, but after trying for almost 7 years to make it to the big leagues, you chose to move back. It was a tough decision, you’d made a life in New York after college, but the big city life wasn’t your favorite and freelancing stories to magazines was not enough to pay the bills anymore.
It was almost 10 pm when you reached the “Welcome to Lawrence” sign and you remembered the last photo you took there. It was your last day before senior prom and you and your best friend, Dean, skipped class to walk around town taking pictures with your brand-new camera.
***
“Come on, YN.” Dean said pulling you towards the woods and away from the high school building.
“Dean, it’s the last day of school, do you really want to have the principal call your parents again?”
Dean scoffed and gave you his stupid Dean Winchester grin as he extended his arms. “It’s last day of school, baby.”
You rolled your eyes and sighed before taking his arm. “Fine, I’ll come with you.”
He gave you another smile. “I’ll get you a beer.”
“I’m not even 18, yet.” You said as if you hadn’t drunk alcohol before.
“Like that has stopped you before.” Dean said and walked along the road next to the woods.
You stopped for a little to take your camera out of your bag and hanged it around your neck.
“You and that camera again?” He teased pointing at it.
“Shut up, Dean.” You said and punched his arm softly.
You and Dean spent most of the day just walking around and talking. You took a lot of pictures of the woods and Dean, you wanted to capture as many moments of your best friend as you could before you had to leave for college while he stayed behind to help his dad with the family business. You were excited for college, you were sick of how small your hometown was, you wanted to see the world and record it through photos and written pieces. However, a part of you wanted to stay, the part that was in love with Dean Winchester.
Your high school was different from the American high school archetype. Jocks and cheerleaders were still the two most popular groups, but the art and drama students were up there too. You, as an art student, were fairly known around your school as a cool kid, but never really stood up. At least not in the way that Dean did.
Dean was the football team’s quarterback and was basically the king of the school. Every guy wanted to be him, and every girl wanted to be with him kind of situation. In a different life, you probably wouldn’t have crossed paths, but your mom and Dean’s mom were best friends since school and that meant you and the Winchester boys were practically raised together.
You and Dean lived next to each other, had classes together, drove to school together, and sometimes even had dinner together at your house if John and Mary had to work late. All the proximity and intimacy made it really hard not to develop feelings for Dean. Dean’s attitude and charm didn’t help either.
“When are you going to finally show me all the pictures you take of me, YN?” Dean teased as he caught you taking yet another one of him, this time the sun was setting behind him and it created a beautiful lens flare around his already perfect face.
“Never.” You replied sticking your tongue out and checking how many photos you had left in your film roll.
“You’re leaving in like, two weeks.” He and walked towards you. “You can’t just leave and not show me your work.”
You chuckled and avoided the situation by pretending to take photos of a particularly boring flower on a bush. “I’m going to college, not fucking moving out of the country, Dean.”
He sighed and looked at you, a glimpse of sadness and nostalgia in his eyes. “Yeah, but you probably won’t come back once you get to the Big Apple.”
“That’s not true, Dean.” You said. “Come on, let’s take a photo by the town sign.”
“There’s way more interesting spots to take out last picture together, YN.” Dean joked, but still followed to the old metal sign.
“Yeah, but I like this one.” You replied and set your camera on a pile of rocks a few steps away from the sign. “Ready?”
Dean nodded and waited for you next to the sign as you set the camera at a good angle and put the 10s timer on.
You ran backwards and Dean caught you in his arms before you could walk to the other side of the sign. “Dean! The timer is running!”
“Just smile, YN.” He said and kept his arms around you.
You turned just in time towards the camera before it took a shot of the both of you smiling.
***
You reached your parents’ old house by 10:30 and your heart skipped a beat when you saw John’s truck parked on the driveway next to yours, ‘Winchester & Singer Co.’ it read on the side. The Winchesters were still your neighbors.
The lights were on inside and you saw Mary walking around the kitchen through the window. You wondered if Dean was still in town, or if he had finally moved out.
“YN?” You heard a familiar voice say and when you turned around you saw Sam, Dean’s baby brother.
“Sam?” You said surprised, not really knowing how to react.
“I can’t believe it’s you!” He said walking towards you and immediately wrapping you in a big hug.
“Woah, you got even bigger.” You joked and gave him a pad on the arm. “What are you doing here? I thought you moved out.”
“Yeah, well I’m back for my wedding.” He replied with a smile.
“W-Wedding?”
He chuckled at your reaction and nodded. “Yeah, I’m getting married in a few weeks. It’s a small ceremony by the lake, my parents finally bought that house we used to rent during the summer, remember?”
“Yeah, of course.” You said with a smile when all the happy memories of your summer vacations started to come back.
“You have to come, YN.” Sam said.
“Are you sure? I mean, this is kind of late for an invite, I’m sure you have all planned by now.” You answered nervously.
“Are you serious? I’d love you have you there.” He said and put his arm around your shoulders. “I would’ve called or sent you an actual invitation if you had kept in touch after high school.”
You looked down and bit your lip. “Yeah, about that… I’m sorry.” You said guiltily.
“It’s okay, I guess we could’ve reached out too, you know?” He said and kissed your temple the way he used to do back when you were kids.
“But anyway, why are you back? Last thing I heard, you were a journalist in New York.” Sam asked looking at your car.
You chuckled and shrugged. “It didn’t work out for me. So, I’m moving back to our old house and I bought a shop on Main to open a café.”
Sam’s eyes went wide and he smiled. “You’re moving back?!”
“Wow, is that really so strange?” You joked.
“No… I mean, yeah.” Sam said explaining himself. “You kind of always said you wanted out, you know? Move to a big city and never come back.”
“Yeah, well… turns out big cities aren’t for me.”
“I’m glad, though.” He smiled genuinely. “I have my big sister back… do I need to call you ma’am now?”
You scoffed and punched him in the chest. “Like you’re much younger than me, Sam.”
“Sam? What’s taking you so long?” You heard a voice coming from the front door of the Winchester house.
“Mom, look who’s back!” Sam exclaimed and you smiled at Mary.
“YN!” She said excitedly and ran down the porch to give you a warm hug. “You’re back?”
“Yeah, I’m moving back home.” You said.
Mary smiled softly and held your hand. “Your parents would’ve been so happy to see you back at home.”
You nodded with a smile, but you felt sadness creeping the back of your mind at the mention of your parents. They had lived in that very house for years before you were born, it had initially belonged to your grandparents. A few years after you finished college your parents had gone to NY for a visit and they were hit by a drunk driver on the road.
Why couldn’t you just fly, dad?
Your parents had left you the house, and for years you rented it through online services, not wanting to go back and relieve painful memories of your mom and dad. You also didn’t want to face a certain Winchester, but you wouldn’t admit that.
“Is that your stuff?” Sam said pointing at your car.
“Yes. I sold most of my things back in New York and left what I couldn’t fit with friends.”
“I’ll help you bring your things inside.” Sam replied.
“I’ll heat up some of the leftover chicken we have and make you two some sandwiches.” Mary offered.
“Don’t worry,” You said. “It’s pretty late, I’m sure you both have things to do in the morning.”
“Nonsense.” Sam insisted. “Dean should be arriving home for his ‘late Sunday dinner’ anytime soon, he can help too.”
You swallowed hard when Sam mentioned Dean. You knew it was a possibility to see him, but you weren’t prepared to face him on your first night back.
“Are you sure?” You asked not wanting to take advantage. “It’s just a few boxes.”
“Stop it,” Mary said and kissed your cheek. “You’re family, YN. We’re here for you.”
You and Sam watched Mary walk back inside the house to make your food and then he turned to you. “So, where do we start?”
You both carried most of your boxes inside your childhood home with ease. Sam and you had been close back in the day, and it was easy to fall back into the same routine and conversation with him. You only had a few boxes left when you heard the familiar rumble of John’s old Impala coming from outside. Your heart skipped a beat and you wanted to run away upstairs, but Sam was already pulling you by the arm.
“Dean!” Sam yelled from your front door, you by his side.
You saw your old best friend get off the Impala and you felt your knees giving up on you. He looked different, but a good different. He wasn't a boy anymore, he was older, you could tell by the light stubble on his face and sprinkle of white hairs. He also had a slight limp on his right leg, almost unnoticeable, but your parents had told you about his injury at the workshop a couple of years ago. Despite the external changes though, it was the same Dean you’d left behind over a decade ago. Faded, ripped jeans, flannels, leather jackets, and boots were still his to-go clothes. His love for his dad’s Impala seemed to have flourished even more now that he owned it. And most of all, he still had those kind and sweet eyes you’d fallen in love with when you were 15.
“Look who’s here.” Sam smiled and pulled you towards the driveway.
Dean looked at you both surprised and confused. His eyes were fixed on you and his hands had dropped the paper bag back into the trunk of his car.
“Hey.” You said and gave him a little wave, you weren’t sure how exactly he was going to react.
“Hey.” He finally said after a few seconds and picked his bag again, closing the trunk.
“That’s all you’re going to say to each other?” Sam asked confused. “You were inseparable back in the day.”
“Yeah, well people change, I guess.” Dean said and you looked down.
He’s still mad.
Mary came out of the house with a tray with sandwiches, juice and glasses.
“Dean, you’re just in time.” She said and kissed him on the cheek. “Sam was just helping YN with her things. Be a darling and give them a hand so you can eat?”
Dean gave you a weird look. "You're moving back?"
"Yeah." You said.
Dean clenched his jaw and you could tell he didn’t want to help you, but he nodded. “I’ll just put this in the fridge.”
You saw him disappear into the house, Mary and Sam exchanging looks.
“Come on, let’s get your last boxes in.” Sam cut the silence and picked a couple boxes from the back seat of your car.
Dean came into the house with the last two boxes a couple of minutes later and set them on the kitchen counter.
“Just leave them there, I’ll move them later.” You said uncomfortably and he nodded.
You stood in silence together for a moment before he shifted in his boots and walked towards the dining room where Mary and Sam were setting the table.
Very smooth, YN.
You took a deep breath and picked the four glasses you were looking for before walking towards the dining room.
Sam and Mary’s conversation made it easy to ignore the obvious tension between you and Dean. Dean was quiet throughout, outside from casual smiles, he didn’t interact at all and you noticed. From time to time, you caught him looking at you, but he quickly shifted his eyes towards his beer or food.
There were so many unsaid things between you, so much unfinished business, but you knew this was not the time or place to talk about it. Hell, you weren’t even sure you wanted to talk about it at all. After you left for college in New York, you’d kept in touch with Dean through calls and texts. The first few weeks you talked for almost an hour every single day. After a couple of months, the daily calls became weekly calls, and then monthly texts. Once you had started your 2nd semester, you barely communicated with Dean anymore, and all the updates on his life came from your mom.
“Anyway, we should get going, boys.” Mary said picking up the dirty plates. “We should let YN sleep, I’m sure she’s exhausted.”
Sam agreed and picked up the glasses, following his mom to the kitchen. Dean stayed behind wiping the crumbs from the table.
“Dean… look, I’m sorry…” You started, your voice barely a whisper.
“Don’t.” He cut you dryly.
You nodded and looked down, your hands sweating in your lap as you tried to reconcile the sweet memories you had of Dean with the man standing in front of you. He had never spoken to you like that, he’d never even gotten mad at you when you were kids.
But like he said, people change.
A couple of minutes after the unfruitful exchange, Sam and Mary came back and hugged you goodnight. Dean just gave you a look and walked out first, which made Mary and Sam look at each other again.
“He must be just tired.” Sam said and smiled before they both left.
You locked the door behind them and breathed out deeply. You were exhausted physically from the drive and mentally from the sudden and unplanned reunion with Dean. You picked the bags with your clothes and walked upstairs to the bedroom. The house had been renovated by the last tenant and your childhood bedroom was now the master bedroom. The old bathroom next to your room was a small walk-in closet, and your dad’s old office was a TV space. Your old parents’ room was gone, and it was turned into a full bathroom and an office. Much of your mom’s decoration choices were gone and you were glad. It was enough that this used to be her home, you couldn’t deal with it still having her essence.
You kicked your boots and changed into an oversized t-shirt before finally getting in bed. You sighed in relief when your head hit the soft pillow and you rolled to your side, your face towards the windows. You realized Dean’s old bedroom was still in the same spot across your room, you couldn’t see much because of the distance, but you recognized his old football trophies. The old memories came rushing back, and you just wanted to forget and sleep. You got up to close the curtains on that window and made yourself ignore the feelings and thoughts in your mind as you laid in bed again, this time with your back towards the window.