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Peter Parker Identity Reveals, Funny/Crackish Peter Parker, avengers twitter fics, Fics That I Love to Reread
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Published:
2021-03-17
Updated:
2022-09-15
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92,197
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45/?
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The Avengers' PR Team Deserves Better

Chapter 44: Natasha, Please Step On Me

Summary:

Shuri finally expands her teleportation device's uses to universal chaos, Natasha meets a fan with an odd request, and Peter and Harley good nephews (and Peter's dance training shines through)

Notes:

HIIIIIIIIIIIIII this took so much longer to start than I thought it would. It literally took like 3 days to write, but it took forever to just... start.
That's probably in part due to all the other writing projects I've got going on right now.

Also so much thanks to @W34SL3YIS0URKING for her part in this chapter. I <3 that part so much, it made me chuckle for sure.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
Y’all remember when Shuri INVENTED TELEPORTATION?

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
Oh yeahhh that WAS me

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
Don’t pretend you forgot.

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
T’Challa told Buck and I that you teleport EVERYWHERE all the time, completely unannounced

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
That… is accurate. Sorry, brother and Nakia

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
EW EW EW EW

King T’Challa @wakandaforever
You just had to broadcast that, didn’t you?

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
MY YOUNG EYES, BROTHER

haha, i can call her mj @michellejones
Can confirm, she’s teleported into my room consistently since she invented it, sometimes it’s in the middle of the night and I wake up to her staring at me from the floor

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
I don’t want to scare you!!!

haha, i can call her mj @michellejones
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU AVOID THAT

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
Anyway, you’ve all given me a wonderful idea. It HAS been a while since I visited the Tower…

Best Dad in the Universe @tonystark
Why is Shuri in my workshop

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
WHAT

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
:D

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
WOAH - attachment
[image: selfie of Shuri and Peter, Tony is still working in the background.]

Caw Caw Motherfuckers @clintbarton
Why is Shuri in my fucking archery range. Wait no she’s gone now. What the fuck @princessshuri

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
:D

chad (endearing) @thor
@princessshuri are you able to travel to Asgard without the Bifrost?

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
Let’s see!

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
I can! - attachment
[image: selfie of Thor and Shuri on Asgard.]

haha, i can call her mj @michellejones
Are you just going to teleport to New York and leave without coming to see me? :(

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
OMW BACK NO REASON JUST BECAUSE

Neddy Boy @nedleeds
s i m p

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
fuck u leeds - sent with StarkPhone’s FRIDAY.2

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
LMAOOOO FRIDAY.2 RATTED YOU TF OUT

haha, i can call her mj @michellejones
FUCK YOU PETER

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
Wrong phone…

What the fuck, Shuri? @princessshuri
Goodnight everybody–

-----------------

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
@natasharomanov would you be so inclined to step on me please?

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
I mean… since you asked so nicely. Let me ask Maria

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
FJDFHJEGUHIAFJK?!?!?!?!

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
She said it was fine. When and where

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
AUNT NAT ANFJFIHGIGNAI

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
I have died. This is the best day of my goddamn LIFE – also Central Park near the Alice statue

maddie, more like tiddie @booksandspite
@W34SL3YIS0URKING really out here winning repping all the wlw/nblw

-----------------

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
Hi yes remember me from an hour ago?

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
Can we plz appreciate that not only did Ms. Natasha Romanov ma’am replied but she AGREED?!

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
Because I’m not quite over that.

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
Also @natasharomanov ma’am I’m by the Alice statue I’m holding a sign :D

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
There is a… suspiciously large group of teenagers by the statue

what's my gender again?(Any pronouns) @allBImyself
Sue us, we’re bored and gay and we heard the Black Widow would be here.

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
Here. I stepped on them. You’re welcome. - attachment
[video: Natasha holds her phone facing the ground. She is wearing black boots, and W34SL3YIS0URKING is wearing red converse. Natasha lifts her boot and steps squarely on W34SL3YIS0URKING’s shoe. It’s clearly not very hard.]

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
I win at life. Fuck off, literally everyone else. - attachments
[image: Natasha and W34SL3YIS0URKING in front of the Alice in Wonderland statue. W34SL3YIS0URKING holds up one hand in a peace sign and has a huge grin, and Natasha is smirking.]
[image: Natasha kisses W34SL3YIS0URKING’s cheek, and if possible, W34SL3YIS0URKING looks even happier.]

selena @salsaandstarburst
Get the fuck out. I would die

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
I have fucking ascended

Ron Weasley haters square tf up (she/they) @W34SL3YIS0URKING
Also omg thank you @natasharomanov you literally have made my life

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
B-)

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
That was disgusting

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
It felt wrong.

-----------------

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
Quick Trivia: What was the most popular dance in the 30s and 40s?
A - the foxtrot
B - swing dancing
C - the mambo
D - the carolina shag

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
For those of you who said swing dancing, you’re right! We also called it the Lindy Hop. Not that the other dances weren’t popular, but they weren’t as popular as swing dancing

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
This is Stevie’s roundabout way of saying we’ve been trying to dance again. We’ve long lost all our old coordinations and we’re really out of practice. The last time we tried any shit like this before this year, Steve was 5’5 and 100 pounds dripping wet.

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
We also recruited some people to learn with us!

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
GUYS ITS SO FUN. Tbh Harley and I have also been working on Carolina Shag, which is insane but so fun too!

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
I refuse to attempt the Carolina Shag.

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
OOO hold on I have a video of Harley and I last time we did it!

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
Here!!! - attachment
[video: pretend this video is Peter and Harley]

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
What the fuck

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
That’s… what the fuck. Teach me.

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
And who’s gonna dance that number with you, Buck?

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
Nat.

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
I think the fuck not.

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
please

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
no

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
please

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
No.

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
please

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
NO

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
please

Mama Spy-der @natasharomanov
N̷̢̙̦̦̎͊͜ò̶̧̢̯͙̠͕̹̩̯̼̹͂̀̊̈́̇̈͆

Cap’s Bitch (they/he) @buckybarnes
Okay cool whatever you want Nat

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
ANYWAY we tried to get Bruce and Tony to learn with us too but they were…

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
How to say this…

THE bi disaster @beterbarker
Terrible?

Turtle of Justice @steverogers
That’s it. That’s the word

Notes:

I already know what the next chapter is going to be... all thanks to @x_ry29 and his amazing ideas. Ilysm bestie, you're the greatest.

I have a new two-chapter work up for you guys ft. Tony and Bruce, fake dating, and Thanksgiving chaos. Chapter is up now!!! Go check it out!

If you enjoyed this chapter, please drop a comment! You guys' comments mean everything to me, and I love reading them!
If you have any ideas for this fic or you'd like to be included as a twitter user in this fic, drop that in the comments, too!
Also, I have Twitter! My Marvel stan/writing account is @localmarvelfan and my DMs are ALWAYS open <3