Chapter Text
God damn this feels good…wait! I’m supposed to be doing something. Fuck but this feels good. Is that his epiglottis?
“Agent A!! What did I just say?”
(30 minutes earlier)
“You know your mission. You are the best of the best of the best. Don’t fail.”
Awsten wasn’t listening but knew that his partner and best friend Travis was. He trusted he would just give him a recap later. On the way to the club, Travis changed which confused Awsten, but it was whatever. Frank the pug let them into the club and took them to the back to the secret elevators.
“I heard you were already informed about what’s going on. This will take you to the room downstairs. Stay close, the party has already started. Hey new kid, you ready?”
“Sure. How hard could this be?” Agent A shrugged.
Frank the Pug and Agent T shared a look. A ding announced the elevator’s arrival
“Here we go boys. You chumps can do this. I hope you remembered to wear a belt”
“Wear a belt?” Agent A thought while the elevator dropped.Both agents stepped on the elevator. As it traveled down, A noticed T tightening his belt and pulling out rubber gloves.
“Okay dude what’s going ooonnn…” before he could finish, the elevator door opened and there was a hand palming his dick over his pants.
“Heyyyyyyy Aws. I see you have a package for me?”
Agent A looked up and recognized the red hair of Jawn. On his forehead was a Gucci symbol in the center of an…eye.
“Nice to finally meet you. I’ve been meaning to eat your ass, but after you quit the band, it was hard to get ahold of you.”
Jawn? Awsten quickly peeked around and noticed that the room was full of naked bodies and smelled of sweat, cum and balls. Otto was approaching them on his hands and knees naked and drooling.
“Nope. You can call me Elijah. Now that you know my name, can you bend over so I can properly greet you?”
Awsten started to become uncomfortably hard especially with the hand gripping him just right. “What are you doing to my friends?”
“Oh, your friends are experience Deadass syndrome thanks to me. And hearing that you aren’t wearing the special underwear, so you are just as susceptible. Otto’s drooling because he knows good wood when he sees it.”
Before he could approach Agent A, Agent T stepped forward. “Elijah Daniel AKA Lil P Hag you are under arrest. Under the intergalactic code Article 584 Section S, sub section p exposing humans to your music and making them gay for your sex parties is not permitted here. Will you come with us willingly?”
“Oh, I will cum alright.” His third eye glowed red and all the grunting in the room stopped. All the other naked attendees approached the agents. “Have fun boys!”
“Oh shit!” Agent T shot off twice but missed due to the naked dicks distracting him.
“Listen up A. We’ve got to take out Elijah, but to do that, we must get to Jawn. Whatever you do, do not let any of these people suck your dick or enter you or they will drain your life force. It would have helped if you had worn a belt.
(back to present)
“Stop getting your dick sucked before you die!”
This finally woke Awsten out of his daze. He looked down to see his ex-drummer deep throating the shit out of him. Nose to pubes and everything. Using his luscious hair, Agent A pulled Otto off his dick and place a well punched head to the temple to knock him out
“Now that wasn’t nice, we just wanted to play came two new voices.”
Agent A looked up to see a naked Geoff and Lucas. Fuck. They pushed Awsten to the ground. One approached Awsten from behind and proceeded to hold his arms back while the other lubed up his already wet dick and proceeded to sit down on it and bounce happily. Lucas from the back, whispered dirty things in Awsten’s ears while kissing his neck. Geoff was going for a fun ride. Awsten could feel his will power leaving him and he started to enjoy it. In a last-ditch effort, he threw his head back and broke Lucas’s nose. With his arm free, he karate chopped Geoff in the neck which knocked him out and shoved him off his dick
“T do you have an extra belt?!! Like now?”
“A I’m kind of busy over hear, but I would love your help”
Awsten turned around and saw Travis was stuck in a similar struggle. Andrew had his arms held back while Dean was grinding on his lap. Lucky Travis listened cause his belt made it difficult for them and his underwear kept his dick soft Awsten was wary of approaching after what just happened. Travis looked like he could handle himself.
“I’m going after Elijah. You’ve got this.”
“But wait A!!”
Ignoring him, Awsten was already approaching the bed where Elijah (In Jawn’s body) was stroking himself
“MMM I bet your ass tastes like blue berries…. or grapes. Which one is it cutie? Are you ready to let me eat it? I could make you feel so good. I can turn you just like a key and have you hopping on my dick like a flea.”
“Get out of my friend’s body. You are under arrest.”
“Humor me twink, do you even know how to get rid of me?”
“Uhh shoot this laser through your skull?”
“Nope you have to fuck me. Fuck me really good. Good enough to want to leave this body. Let me feel what these Earth girls are begging for, big boy.”
Damn it but there wasn’t much he could do. He couldn’t leave his friends down here stuck as Elijah’s play things.
“Fine but I top”
“Of course, you do boo”
Agent T took a deep breath to look at his unconscious friends. He didn’t want to knock his friends out, but dick was not his thing. As he secured on new gloves, a very loud and wet clapping sound began with bed springs accompanying it. Then the moaning started.
“Yea you like that shit huh. Who’s bottom now. I hear aliens love it doggy style. You’re to take all of this”
“God yes daddy. Punish this alien. I’ve been naughty. This ass is yours.”
Turning around, Travis saw something he wish he hadn’t
“Agent A, what in the fuck are you doing?!!”
Slowing down Awsten looked back, “I’m ending this. I have to fuck the alien out of Jawn”
“No, you don’t. You should have been listening you idiot.”
This made Awsten pause. Elijah/Jawn started laughing while still bent over. “Please don’t stop. They should have named you Thor with the way you sling that hammer.”
Awsten pulled himself out in disgust. “What is going on”
“It’s the Deadass syndrome. It’s making you horny and you should probably check to see if you have a flaky butthole. That’s when the final stages set in.” Agent T approached the bent over Jawn with a gloved hand and reached into his ass. Hitting his G spot, caused him to start coughing. While he kept stimulating it, Jawn continued to cough until finally, a lump came out.
About the size of Thumbelina stood the alien known as Lil P Hag. Agent T removed his hand from Jawn’s ass and placed the captive in a storage container.
“Are you shitting me? So, I didn’t have to have sex with him.”
“If you had been listening, your dick would have been safe in your pants. Nice job rookie. I detained Lil P-hag and we will have the clean up crew take care of your friends. Let’s go.”
“Wait wait. One thing first.” Awsten runs to his pants and grabs something from the pocket. He approaches Jawn just as the side effects of being possessed wear off.
“Aw-Awsten is that..you? Why am I naked? And hard?”
“Hey Jawn. Eat my ass,” and proceeded to fart in his face
“What the fu-“ before he could finish, Awsten used the neuralyzer and erased Jawn’s memories back to before he was possessed by Lil P-hag.