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Amazon Women on the Moon is a 1987 American satirical science fiction film that parodies the experience of watching low-budget films on late-night television. The film, featuring a large ensemble cast including cameo appearances from film and TV stars and even non-actors, was written by Michael Barrie and Jim Mulholland, and takes the form of a compilation of 21 comedy skits directed by five different directors: Joe Dante, Carl Gottlieb, Peter Horton, John Landis, and Robert K. Weiss.
| Amazon Women on the Moon | |
|---|---|
 Theatrical release poster | |
| Directed by | |
| Written by | |
| Produced by |
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| Starring | |
| Cinematography | Daniel Pearl |
| Edited by | Malcolm Campbell |
| Music by | Ira Newborn |
Production company | |
| Distributed by | Universal Pictures |
Release date |
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Running time | 85 minutes |
| Country | United States |
| Language | English |
| Budget | $5 million |
| Box office | $548,696[1] |
The title Amazon Women on the Moon refers to the central film-within-a-film, a spoof of science-fiction films from the 1950s that borrows heavily from Queen of Outer Space (1958) starring Zsa Zsa Gabor, itself a film that recycles elements of earlier science-fiction works such as Cat-Women of the Moon (1953), Fire Maidens from Outer Space (1955), and Forbidden Planet (1956).[2]
John Landis had previously directed The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977), which employed a similar sketch anthology format.
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Fictional television station WIDB-TV (channel 8) experiences problems with its late-night airing of science-fiction classic Amazon Women on the Moon, a 1950s B movie in which Queen Lara (Sybil Danning) and Captain Nelson (Steve Forrest) battle exploding volcanoes and man-eating spiders on the Moon. Waiting for the film to resume, an unseen viewer begins channel surfing—simulated by bursts of white noise—through late night cable, with the various segments and sketches of the film representing the programming found on different channels. The viewer intermittently returns to channel 8, where Amazon Women continues airing before faltering once more.
These segments feature:
- Arsenio Hall as a man who experiences a series of mishaps around his apartment, culminating with him falling through a window;
- Monique Gabrielle as a model who goes about her daily routine in Laguna, California, completely naked;
- Lou Jacobi as a man named Murray, zapped into the television, wandering through films like King Kong and through other sketches, screaming for his wife to help him;
- Michelle Pfeiffer and Peter Horton as a young couple having trouble with and eccentric doctor (Griffin Dunne), who goes to great lengths to not show them their newborn baby, e.g. by presenting them a Mr. Potato Head toy wrapped in a blanket instead. It turns out he had misplaced the baby after a nurse finds it;
- Joe Pantoliano as the presenter of a commercial recommending stapling carpet to a bald head as a hair loss prevention measure;
- David Alan Grier as "Don 'No Soul' Simmons" and B.B. King as himself in a public-service appeal for "blacks without soul". Simmons later appears in a commercial for a compilation CD of bland love songs sung by him, turning "a personal affliction into a recording career";
- Rosanna Arquette as a young woman on a blind date with a man played by Steve Guttenberg. She asks him for an ID and a credit card and uses them with computer to obtain a protocol of all of his previous dates and sexual encounters. After being disgusted by the things she reads about him, she throws him out. When the man later asks another woman out, she shocks him by also asking him for his IDs;
- Henry Silva as the host of a show entitled Bullshit or Not?, clearly intended as a spoof of Ripley's Believe It or Not! with Jack Palance and In Search of.... Silva proposes the possibility that Jack the Ripper was actually the Loch Ness Monster;
- Archie Hahn as a man who dies by heart attack after watching a "two thumbs down" review of his life by two film critics (Roger Barkley and Al Lohman mimicking Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert), then is roasted at his funeral by a variety of people, including Steve Allen, Henny Youngman, and even his own wife; the funeral becomes so entertaining it is held over for weeks.
- William Marshall as the leader of the Video Pirates, who hijack an MCA Home Video ship, uncover a vast amount of videotapes and laserdiscs, and promptly begin illegally bootlegging the media;
- Ed Begley Jr., as the son of the Invisible Man. He believes he has replicated his father's formula but is in fact fully visible. When he takes off his clothes and goes naked to the pub, he is arrested for indecent exposure;
- John Ingle as the director of an art museum which is has lost its lease and has to sell off its complete collection extremely cheaply, including the Mona Lisa and the United States Declaration of Independence;
- Angel Tompkins as a president's First Lady who is also a former hooker;
- Matt Adler as a teenager trying to purchase a pack of "Titan" brand condoms for his date. Since he is the company's one billionth customer, he is accosted in the pharamacy by the company CEO and mascot, photographed and filmed against his wishes, provided with a lifetime supply of condoms and made part of an ad campaign;
- Marc McClure as a man renting a personalized date video. He watches the video, which has his date (Corrine Wahl) call him by his name and is in point of view format. They have sex when her boyfriend (Andrew Dice Clay) storms in, shoots her and then himself. Afterwards the police arrive in the video and in real life and arrest the man;
- "Reckless Youth" – an epilogue at the end of the credits, with Carrie Fisher and Paul Bartel in a black-and-white ephemeral film warning about the spread of "social diseases" in the style of Reefer Madness.
Alternative versions
An alternate version of the "Pethouse Video" sketch was filmed for the television broadcast of the film, with Monique Gabrielle in lingerie instead of appearing naked throughout the segment. However, most European television broadcasts of the film retained the original theatrical version. Bullshit or Not? was retitled Baloney or Not? for the television version.
The American television edit, in addition to the alternative "Pethouse Video" sketch, features an additional bridging sequence between the death of Harvey Pitnik and his subsequent celebrity roast. In it, the mortician successfully cons Pitnik's widow into having the celebrity roast as part of the funeral, and her performance gets such strong positive feedback, it becomes a continuing performance series lasting for weeks.
The DVD release features an unreleased sketch titled "The Unknown Soldier", starring Robert Loggia with Ronny Cox, Bernie Casey, and Wallace Langham. Some television broadcasts of the film featured the sketches "Peter Pan Theater" and "The French Ventriloquist's Dummy", which were not present in the theatrical version.
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"Mondo Condo" (directed by John Landis):
- Arsenio Hall as Apartment Victim
"Pethouse Video" (directed by Carl Gottlieb):
- Donald F. Muhich as Easterbrook
- Monique Gabrielle as Taryn Steele
"Murray in Videoland" (directed by Robert K. Weiss):
- Lou Jacobi as Murray
- Erica Yohn as Selma
- Debby Davison as Weatherperson
- Rob Krausz as Floor Manager
- Phil Hartman as Baseball Announcer
- Corey Burton as Anchorman
"Hospital" (directed by Landis):
- Michelle Pfeiffer as Brenda Landers
- Peter Horton as Harry Landers
- Griffin Dunne as Dr. Raymond
- Brian Ann Zoccola as Nurse
"Hairlooming" (directed by Joe Dante):
- Joe Pantoliano as Sy Swerdlow
- Stanley Brock as Customer
"Amazon Women on the Moon" (directed by Weiss):
- Corey Burton as TV Announcer
- Steve Forrest as Captain Steve Nelson
- Robert Colbert as "Blackie"
- Joey Travolta as Butch
- Forrest J Ackerman as U.S. President
- Sybil Danning as Queen Lara
- Lana Clarkson as Alpha Beta
- Lyle Talbot as Prescott Townsend
"Blacks Without Soul" (directed by Landis):
- David Alan Grier as Don "No Soul" Simmons
- B.B. King as himself
- William Bryant (credited as Bill Bryant) as Male Republican
- Roxie Roker as Female Republican
- Le Tari as Pimp
- Christopher Broughton as Fan Club President
"Two I.D.s" (directed by Peter Horton):
- Rosanna Arquette as Karen
- Steve Guttenberg as Jerry
"Bullshit or Not" (directed by Dante):
- Henry Silva as himself
- Sarah Lilly as Prostitute
"Critics' Corner" (directed by Dante):
- Roger Barkley (credited as Barkley) as Herbert
- Al Lohman (credited as Lohman) as Frankel
- Archie Hahn as Harvey Pitnik
- Belinda Balaski as Bernice Pitnik
- Justin Benham as Pitnik Boy
- Erica Gayle as Pitnik Girl
"Silly Pâté" (directed by Weiss):
- Corey Burton as Announcer
- T. K. Carter as Host
- Phil Proctor as Mike
- Ira Newborn as Fred
- Karen Montgomery as Karen
"Roast Your Loved One" (directed by Dante):
- Archie Hahn as Harvey Pitnik
- Belinda Balaski as Bernice Pitnik
- Justin Benham as Pitnik Boy
- Erica Gayle as Pitnik Girl
- Bryan Cranston as Paramedic #1
- Robert Picardo as Rick Raddnitz
- Rip Taylor as himself
- Slappy White as himself
- Jackie Vernon as himself
- Henny Youngman as himself
- Charlie Callas as himself
- Steve Allen as himself
"Video Pirates" (directed by Weiss):
- William Marshall as Pirate Captain
- Tino Insana as Mr. Sylvio
- Donald Gibb as Graceless Pirate
- Frank Collison as Grizzled Pirate
- Bill Taylor as Gruesome Pirate
"Son of the Invisible Man" (directed by Gottlieb):
- Ed Begley Jr. as Griffin
- Chuck Lafont as Trent
- Pamla Vale as Woman In Pub
- Larry Hankin as man In Pub
- Garry Goodrow as Checker Player
- Roger La Page as London Bobby
"French Ventriloquist's Dummy" (directed by Dante):
- Dick Miller as Danny Clayton the Ventriloquist
- Phil Bruns as Danny's Manager
- Martin Goslins as the French Ventriloquist
"Art Sale" (directed by Gottlieb):
- John Ingle as Felix Van Dam
"First Lady of the Evening" (directed by Weiss):
- Angel Tompkins as First Lady
- Terry McGovern as Salesman
- Michael Hanks as Announcer
"Titan Man" (directed by Weiss):
- Matt Adler as George
- Kelly Preston as Violet
- Ralph Bellamy as Mr. Gower
- Howard Hesseman as Rupert King
- Steve Cropper as Customer
- Chris Wolf as Mascot Bip
"Video Date" (directed by Landis):
- Marc McClure as Ray
- Russ Meyer as Video Salesman
- Corrine Wahl as Sharri
- Andrew Dice Clay as Frankie
- Willard E. Pugh as Speaking Cop
"Reckless Youth" (directed by Dante):
- Carrie Fisher as Mary Brown
- Paul Bartel as Doctor
- Herb Vigran as Agent
- Tracy Hutchinson as Floozie
- Mike Mazurki as Dutch
- Frank Beddor as Ken
"The Unknown Soldier" (directed by Horton)
- Robert Loggia as General McCormick
- Bernie Casey as Major General Hadley
- Ronny Cox as General Balentine
- Wallace Langham as Private Anson W. Pucket
"Peter Pan Theatre" (directed by Gottlieb)
- Jenny Agutter as Cleopatra
- Raye Birk as Vanya
- Mark Bringelson as Theater Customer #1
- Victoria Ann Lewis as Theater Customer #2
- Vivian Bonnell as Theater Customer #3
- Kellye Nakahara as Theater Customer #4
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Amazon Women on the Moon was filmed in 1985 with plans for an August 1986 release, but due to the ongoing legal fallout from director John Landis's involvement in the Twilight Zone accident, Universal repeatedly pushed the release date and issued a gag order on publicity for the film while the trial was ongoing.[3]
The majority of critics agreed that the quality was inconsistent throughout the film. Variety called it "irreverent, vulgar and silly... [with] some hilarious moments and some real groaners too."[4] Roger Ebert in the Chicago Sun-Times felt that the exercise was somewhat unnecessary: "Satirists are in trouble when their subjects are funnier than they are."[5]
Janet Maslin of The New York Times, in a largely positive review, described the film as "an anarchic, often hilarious adventure in dial-spinning, a collection of brief skits and wacko parodies that are sometimes quite clever, though they're just as often happily sophomoric, too."[6]
Certain portions of the film were singled out for praise. "The funniest episode probably is 'Son of the Invisible Man', directed by Carl Gottlieb, in which Ed Begley Jr. plays a man who thinks he is invisible but is not", wrote the Chicago Sun-Times.[5] "The film's best sight gags come from Robert K. Weiss, who deserves kudos for the inspired idiocy of his Amazon Women segments", was the opinion of The New York Times.[6]
In a retrospective article for Entertainment Weekly, Chris Nashawaty called this film "the beginning of the end of Landis' career". He cited the episodes featuring Monique Gabrielle, Archie Hahn, Ed Begley Jr., and David Alan Grier as "inspired", but criticized others for their failure: "You'll never see Michelle Pfeiffer look as trapped as she does in her skit with Thirtysomething's Peter Horton, or Joe Pantoliano and Arsenio Hall as unfunny as they are in their skits."[7]
Amazon Women on the Moon has a rating of 65% on Rotten Tomatoes, based on 20 reviews, with an average rating of 5.7/10.[8] On Metacritic it has a 42% score based on reviews from 11 critics.[9]
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- The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977), a similarly formatted anthology comedy from John Landis
- Disco Beaver from Outer Space (1978)
- UHF (1989)
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