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Hawk_Jones
Reviews
Jeepers Creepers: Reborn (2022)
Just Plain Bad
Bad green screen, bad special effects, mediocre British actors doing TERRIBLE southern American accents. Don't be fooled by the opening sequence with legend Dee Wallace because that's the best acting and set piece you'll see in the entire movie. Additionally, the two leads have ZERO chemistry, not sure why they're together. The girl was annoyed by the boyfriend's passion for horror and cryptozoology and made certain he knew it regularly. 🙄
In this rendition, the Creeper is basically a human with wings. Long gone are the amazing stunts and wire work that gave the Creeper supernatural movement. Now, he just runs around a mansion while grounded.
Speaking of the Creeper, the new design is terrible. Looks more like the alien in Enemy Mine than anything resembling the Creeper. 👎👎
GLOW: Outward Bound (2019)
Disappointing Episode
Extremely disappointing. After 3 and half wonderful seasons, the writers and director decided to take this beautifully diverse cast and turn them into prejudiced whiners.
I found the victim mentality displayed by these previously strong and well-developed characters to be completely off the mark and confusing. These are tough, strong characters who are suddenly offended at the slightest misinterpretation by their friends!!! I don't buy it. Hopefully, the rest of the season will go back to form.
The Beach House (2019)
The Fog + Rabid = The Beach House
The reviews for this movie are incredibly inconsistent. However it seems like people are agreeing about certain aspects. Everyone seems to agree with the sentiment that the movie is a slow burn. I personally found the first half of the film to be interesting and it increasingly built tension. Others will say it was boring.
The film is also being hammered on for being mysterious and accused of offering no real explanation as to why certain things are happening. Not true, there are several scenes/conversations that offer theories and possible answers to what is happening. However, the theories are presented indirectly. I personally found the explanations interesting enough.
The climax of the film is ultimately why I recommend this movie. Around the 50 minute mark is when this film separates itself from the pack. There are 2 horrific set pieces in particular that are extremely well shot and present genuine creepy imagery.
Scoob! (2020)
The title tells you it's going to be different
First of all, when I first heard Scooby speak, I thought, wow, what an odd choice of voice actor, because it sounds nothing like him. And then I learned it was Frank Welker...love you Frank, thanks for the memories, but I'm sorry to say, the performance was off.
Anyway, after the first 15 minutes of the movie, the writers mysteriously decide to split the characters up and keep them separated from each other for the next hour. Stupid! Falcon and his team are then needlessly shoehorned in and add nothing to the story. Mark Wahlberg does his worst Ryan Reynolds impression and overall this was a giant disappointment.
I'll never tell anyone to stay away, but if you grew up in the 70s and 80s, you're not going to like what they did to the franchise.
Critters Attack! (2019)
Not perfect, fun if you want it to be.
This is by no means a masterpiece of modern cinema, but if allow yourself to have fun, you will. Thank you syfy channel for giving me more critters.
PROS:
1) Practical effects (mostly)
2) The puppeteers are on point! Great job.
3) Fun critter action
4) Dee Wallace
5) The addition of a female crite. She's adorable, funny and tough.
CONS:
1) The critters didn't communicate with each other at all.
2) Female crite storyline is glossed over.
3) B & C story threads are extremely generic and not really interesting.
4) Not enough Dee Wallace.
5) The critters are never let loose. At most you see 4 or 5 feasting...but definitely no "hungry heifer" scenes.