Crackcoon

Quote from chaz: "yo yo yo, what's up my?" The godfather of this century!

An absolute masterpiece of the cinema. I haven't seen a movie that has such cohesiveness and connecability with the actors. The acting is flawless, the puppet is flawless, the crack's acting is flawless. It is the best thing I have seen in the last century. Beyond compare. Most of the bad reviews were people that were envious of the film's success. The dialogue is well thought out. The props are immaculate (including the empty beer bottle he was drinking). In short, this film is a masterpiece that needs to be shown to every child of the world. It has brought me to tears, and is beyond comprehension.

From the outset, the screenplay, direction, cinematography, and overall production felt painfully low-budget and reminiscent of D-list horrors. The film was so excruciating to sit through, it ranks among the most grotesque and nonsensical I've ever encountered. I was genuinely shocked by how poorly directed this film was.

Now, about the raccoon: it resembled a bizarre cross between an animatronic and a stuffed toy gone rogue. When it lunged at its victims, it looked like a prop pulled from a discount store. The attempts to create a terrifying creature fell flat, and the moments where they resorted to CGI were laughably bad. It was as if they had a limited budget and decided to throw together whatever they could find.

Could best be described as a white exploitation film. No fear factor supplied by mediocre characters. Perhaps some acting classes and a non bubble gum budget could have made this film tolerable. The ratty assed racoon looked like it was designed by blind highschool children. The nude scenes couldn't save this one. The opening scene cuts to inexplicable morgue scene. The portrayal of the gay men was lame. I gave one star for the sheriff's wife's boobs. The best thing about the movie is that it ended. I am praying to the movie gods that there will not be a sequel. Mankind has suffered enough misery.

I definitely was not expecting much when I rented this film off of YouTube. I went to the matinee on the day that Cocaine Bear opened, so I consider myself an expert in films like this. The first 30 to 40 minutes were uneventful.

But once the killing started there were many memorable moments that will stick with you, and for that alone makes this film, head and shoulders above many other films including other genres, too.

The raccoon was so awesomely scrappy looking without going in the detail, I just loved the over the top everything towards the end. And the gratuitous nude scenes, which is exactly where gratuitous nothing more we're great!

Now I am going to be as short as humanly possible. Please stop wasting your time watching this low IQ brain dead micro budget cheap looking pieces of celluloid.

Movie description: Not sure who makes those movies but they are awful and I mean real awful, from the script, to the story to the acting, and even worse the so called special effects. Its terribly filmed and it look amateur at WORST. Even if it was aiming at a comedy horror gender it failed on every way. The raccoon himself is a puppet and when it attacks the so called actor or cast hold it on place it's that hilarious.

P. S. I am a non bias reviewer critic and I try to warn you on what not to watch. First off this kannibalcorpsegrinder guy is certainly a studio shill who 100% has connects to these low budget independent films. There is no way this film is a 10/10 and is "near-flawless".

I know I am not the only one who reads his reviews and gets irritated by his constant nonsense spewing. Literally it is all lies. Please do not listen to a word he says. Thanks guysss! (Jericho voice)