Tromeo & Juliet

This trash version of `Romeo and Juliet' passes in Manhattan in the present days. Romeo (Will Keenan) is an a**hole and violent member of family Que, and Juliet (Jane Jensen) is a sexy (with beautiful legs and breasts) and bisexual girl of Capulet family. The scatological situations this romantic pair will face are very funny. Although being a cult movie (inclusive exhibited in Rio de Janeiro Festival), it is not recommended for all the audiences. If the viewer is fan of Peter Jackson's former movies (`Braindead', `Bad Taste'), `Toxic Avenger', `Body Melt' and other trash movie, he will certainly love this flick. Otherwise, he will hate it. Since I belong to the first group, my vote is eight.

Romeo and Juliet, let's face it, is a silly story at its core, about two young dopey kids who live under rival tribe-gangs, and then meet and at first sight fall desperately in love. The rival-gang story might be fine enough, but the 'young-first-love' thing grows tired, at least for me, once I get past the age of reason (certain exceptions, like when Jerome Robbins adds kick-ass choreography and sings for West Side Story, or in little animated spurts, abound). So, mixing this silly story into the mix of Lloyd Kaufman and Michael Herz's Troma world is actually not a bad idea: lots of torpedo-the-top violence, excessive, icky almost Nickelodeon-slime-like gore, nudity and sex, and punk rock and piercings and tattoos for the characters. When there's a gang-fight here, or any kind of altercation that might result in violence, there's not only gotta be blood - severed limbs, torn and cracked skulls, maybe even the occasional mutation or radioactive penis might do the trick.

Here, it's a story told with a little more down-and-dirt grit (and coming out right around the time, intentional or not, with the Baz Luhrman Romeo + Juliet makes a terrific counterpoint for that film's unknowing stupidity). The Capulets and the Montagues were once partners in a film screening business, until Mr. Capulet screwed over Mr. Montague. Now its years later and Tromeo wants true love, as does Juliet, though they both have intended others (for Juliet, a son of a billionaire Juliet's evil father - and yes, he's evil as you will see, incestuous too). They meet at a costume party and have a dance, and right there it's love. But oh, what light on yon Plexiglas does shine! What does that mean? You'll have to see it to believe it.

Tromeo and Juliet offers up a lot of the gross-out stuff and crazy, X-rated cartoonish violence, including, a hight-light for me, a man's face stuck in a car window as it drives at top speed and then being flung to a fire hydrant. Ouch. But it also has James Gunn as writer and (un-official-but-really-was-co) director of the film, and it's fascinating to see after Slither and Super to see that his mark is on it: the film is more disturbing than one might expect from the crude but playful Kaufman, such as the 'black room' with the Plexiglas Capulet has, and some of the more crazy sexual dialog (though some of it is still Troma-light, like when Juliet calls a phone sex line just cause a picture she sees in the ad looks like Tromeo... and the guy on the other end is a 400 pound guy eating a pizza while he sex talks!) You gotta know, this is not your grand-daddy's R&J; this isn't even Abel Ferrara's 80's rock take China Girl. This is a beast of true B to maybe Z grade coverage of the story, with Lemmy from Motorhead as narrator, and, I should note, lots and lots of sex (though some semi-sweet romance midway through too). It's outrageous, it's stupid, it's childish, offensive, disgusting, maybe pornographic in its fetishizing of special effects and the same car crash footage used in every other Troma feature. But it's fun, and it knows it, and that's what counts here. It's all of a piece, to put it another way, even as certain pieces may fall flat or just astound with how bad the acting is or how obvious a stunt is (or, yeah, a boom mic in a few shots).

Yes!! They finally got it down to perfection. What a great idea, a refreshing exploitation epic for Generation-X, whether they know it or not. After disasters like Sgt. Kabukiman NYPD, and getting screwed by Blockbuster, our hero, Lloyd Kaufman just decided to go for it, stop catering to distributors, and let Troma be all the Troma it can be. Lloyd would make this one the most unapologetic, outlandish and downright hilarious Troma movie yet. This time, Lloyd takes Shakespeare's love story, turns it inside out, Tromatizes it, and adds that long, lost, entertainment value it was always lacking. Entertainment value, such as Lemmy Kilmister (the narrator), Debbie Rochon (the cook), Joe Fleishaker (the fat guy), and of course, brutal mutilations and toilet humor. Tromeo And Juliet is the definitive edition of a rather lackluster story, and the crown jewel of the Troma universe.

Years ago, in Tromaville, N.J. business partners, Monty Que and Cap Capulet start a film company called Silky Films, which would produce supposedly tasteful, soft core films. Monty considers Cap his friend, but Cap is out to screw the poor sucker out of his share of the company. On paper, and in books, it appears that Monty gave away his life's work for free. Fast forward to mid-90's Manhattan, we have two families who are extremely displeased with one another, it's to the point that they're just looking for a reason to take a limb, or preferably, a life. Monty has a son, Tromeo, nephew, Benny, they, with their friend, Murray Martini, who's just a little too excited about all the carnage, wage war on the incestuous Capulets, except Monty, he's too drunk to care. Like in the original, there is a confusing situation, leading to Tromeo falling for Cap's daughter, who he has never met, or never even knew about. Unfortunately, Cap is a sadistic pervert, who, not unlike Tromeo's dad, has a thing for the bottle, and this would of course, lead to daddy's little chenshaw melon being physically, and emotionally abused, and molested, and kept in a Plexiglas cage, off and on, depending on how foul of a mood Cap is in. Cap is also forcing his vegetarian daughter to marry London Arbuckle, a billionaire butcher, who, would make just about anyone uneasy, with or without the raisin loaf. With all these inconveniences, the young lovers feel that eloping would be the best decision, but how will this effect the big feud? It might, or might not, go a little something like the original, but figuring out how this one ends up is just simply not going to happen, you'll never see it coming.

"The one with Leo" is downright sleep-inducing compared to Tromeo & Juliet, but if watered-down, over-directed, big-budget, Hollywood, Garbage is what you've been programmed to go for, then by all means, go for it, but if you're in the mood for something a little more colorful, something that really packs a punch, and doesn't follow the "normal" movie pattern, and if you happen to have a rather abnormal sense of humor, then you just might not hate this movie. Tromeo And Juliet gives the finger to all that is mainstream. Full-blast exploitation with as much mean-spirited humor as anything from a young John Waters. Along with some badass acting, Tromeo And Juliet flaunts a thunderous score which includes the legendary Motorhead, and not to mention, much input from James Gunn, that really brought this one together. For more awesomeness from James Gunn, check out Lollilove, and for more excellence from Lloyd Kaufman, check out his next vision, Terror Firmer. Tromeo And Juliet is jaw-droppingly priceless Exploitation for the 90's brought to us by the one, and only, king of the B-movies. Thank's, Lloyd. 10/10

A very bizarre bringing to the screen of William Shakespeare's tragic love story.

The Que family and the Capulet family have a long running hatred of one another which often results in violence. The hatred has something to do with a film company and the fact that everyone is pretty much crazy. In the middle of all of this insanity are Tromeo and Juliet, literature's most famous "star crossed" lovers that fall for each other at first sight and problems arise when they realize whose family the other belongs to.

The film follows the basic plot of the original play remarkably well and key scenes even use the original, or close to original, lines. But the infamous Troma bizarreness pervades the film from beginning to end. That makes for a movie that is definitely not for all tastes, but it is nonetheless pretty inventive. Tyrone (Tybalt in Shakespeare) has a particularly funny death scene. 7/10

Many differently edited and rated versions exist. Each contains violence, profanity, drug use, and sex, all with a big dose of bizarreness.

Tromeo And Juliet is a funny movie. It's a good movie. It's a cool movie. And even a perverted and violent movie. But above all it is a weird movie. Bill Shakespere wouldn't just roll over in his grave if he saw this he'd probably spin like a top. There's a lot to be said for a movie that has a person in the credits under the title "stunt nipple". The found a peanut bouncing head is hilarious, but not as funny as the guy picking up his brain and futily trying to put it back in his head while crying. The religious hymn of "Job We Gather At The River" each time someone dies brings happy recollections of the opening moments in The Wild Bunch. This is definately a good movie. Watch it sober your first time around however.