Catalina Caper

For starters, I usually don't watch Tommy Kirk movies. Most of us who have seen this piece of celluloid dung saw it on MST3K. When Volume 1 came out and included the films without the running commentary, I decided to see how bad some of these things actually are. My God what a fool I was.

The "plot" here is that some thieves decided to pull a bait and switch using a stolen scroll on some rich guy. The scroll gets lost due to incompetence while they're showing the goods to the rich guy's lackey. This could be a poor plot (not good, but would suffice to make a B movie) except for the fact that they decided to throw in a bunch of kids who get mixed up in the whole thing. Between the lousy music (Little Richard did OK, but the others were terrible), dancing, scuba footage, and attempts to develop love interests there should be something holding this together besides bad jokes and a loose caper "plot." On top of all of this, the "talent" seemed to not really care what was going on, so the results are predictably crappy.

For God's sake, don't watch without MST3K.

Even by 60's beach party movie standards, this is really cheesy. Actually, awful is a more accurate term. I guess this was intended to be a fun beach party movie but somewhere along the line, it turned out to be a physically and psychologically draining experience. Bad acting all around. Lots of awful music, including a little number in which Little Richard humiliates himself. And a lot of *ahem* comedy that falls flat on its face (quite literally in the case of the obnoxious pratfall guy who serves as the would-be comic relief). And to top it all off, thrown into this mess, making the movie even more convulted than it already was, is a subplot involving an ancient scroll stolen by a bunch of bungling jewel thieves.

This movie was turned into a classic episode of the dearly departed MST3K, so I can't really say this movie turned out to be a complete waste of film. But if you dare watch this soul-sucking movie without the company of Joel Hodgson and his robot pals, you might end up with the urge to jump out the nearest window to put yourself out of your misery.

This movie has very little going for it besides the performance of Tommy Kirk, the funny hat that chubby comedy-relief guy wears, and the cinematography of Ted V. Mikels. But it does has an ace up its sleeve - Robert Donner!

Yes, Robert Donner, that renowned character actor justly beloved for his roles as Yancey Tucker on "The Waltons" and Exidor on "Mork and Mindy". However, the movie's makers, apparently afraid that Mr. Donner, with his overwhelmingly dignified presence, would steal the show from the "stars", forced him to make a series of embarrassing and incredibly forced pratfalls. Oh, the ignominy of it all!

By now, everyone should know that the beach movies in the mid '60s were at the bottom of the cinematic barrel. Little more than excuses to have a bunch of sexually inactive teenagers party, they make you gag time and again.

Which brings us to "Catalina Caper". It is actually possible to like this movie. All that you have to do is rent it and go straight to the Little Richard scene. If you watch only that scene, then the movie is rather admirable. But if you watch any other scenes, then you see that the movie is pure flotsam. A jumbled story of muscle men and big-breasted women foiling a Greek millionaire's heist, "Catalina Caper" will make you roll your eyes. But let's face it: Tommy Kirk never starred in any good movies.

If you really want to watch this flick, then watch the "MST3K" episode where they mock it. Joel and the 'bots have a marvelous time with this one. Servo even sings a song about the woman whom he calls "Creepy Girl". I believe that it was Crow who made a joke pertaining to the Greek guy's name.

Tommy Kirk was signed to a four-picture deal with Executive Pictures Corporation and "Catalina Caper" was the first picture of that deal. Kirk subsequently did not make any further films with Executive Pictures, which should be an indication as to the quality and financial success of "Catalina Caper." A group of teens, led by Kirk, find themselves sucked into international intrigue over a forged and stolen scroll. The film is a bizarre hybrid of a Beach Party and Flint comic spy picture, but lacks the fun of either of those films. The Beach Party films were not exactly big budget musicals, but those films look like lavish MGM musical productions in comparison to the bottom of the barrel production values of "Catalina Caper." Outside of a few catchy musical numbers from surf bands you've never heard of, there's nothing to make this film worth watching. It wasn't even all that enjoyable on a camp level. Go ahead and skip this one.