The Surreal Life

The Surreal Life is basically a bunch of washed up celebrities and other has-beens that share a house in the latest of VH1's incessant network of Reality-TV torture.

I have watched a few shows of the recent season of the Surreal Life (the one with Peter Brady) and it is by far the most vapid experience of my life, watching a bunch of retarded exhibitionist has-been "celebrities" trying to gain as much attention by being as crude as possible. This show gives me a homicidal twitch, as I am consistently both annoyed and shocked that VH1 managed to pack in a house a handful of the most embarrassing people on the planet, especially Chyna, that model that near-violently obsesses about Peter Brady, that moron from the Go-Gos, and the guy who played Mini Me.

Ever get the need to dry heave, then tune in.

VH1, you officially suck!

Ugh! Why did they let The Roaring Bitch come on this one? I didn't like Jerri on Survivor:The Australian Outback or Survivor:All Stars and I'm not about to start liking her now. Even though I did feel sorry for her when she had her melt down I still hate her with every fiber of my being. She was cocky, arrogant and too smart for her own good. :p The producers of this show ought to be drawn out and shot for letting Ms Manthey on this show. She is, coincidently, the most annoying person on that show along side Gabriel Carteris. A lot of people find Jerri is how she was portrayed on the Australian Outback and on All-Stars. She's a whiny bitch.

I've seen little bits and pieces of the first season,all of the second season,and I have to say the third season is so far the best. Not only because Flavor Flav from Public Enemy and funny man Dave Coulier is in it. The third season is just more interesting and suspenseful. Unlike the second season which was a little dry at times but they all seem to get along and tolerate one another. The third season cast is more detached and self-centered. The only ones I 've seen to be more realistic is Dave and Flavor. Flavor's enthusiasm give this show life and without him this cast would appear to keep to themselves. Let's start off with Charo she may mean well but she is selfish,at the beginning of the show she down right takes charge of who should sleep where. She (Charo) been in America for a long time and you still can't understand what's she's saying. Right away she's giving orders around the house and naming the dog she found "Cuchi" which none of the others agree with. Brigitte Nelson is another selfish one who loves to lead men on (namely Flav) and then drop them like they never existed. Ryan Star who is young and bitter probably because she didn't get her career kicked off the way she wanted "thanks American Idol." Ryan is another one who is too particular and do not know to adapt and have fun. Poor Jordan Knight is too self-indulged to be interesting. I hope in the next couple of episodes this cast will stick together and bring more harmony to one another instead of worry about personality conflicts.

I liked the first season, but the second was my favorite. I loved everyone on the show. There was something about them so I ran to the IMDb and looked up their birthdays. Sure enough, except for Traci Bingham, they were all water signs! I liked Ron Jeremy. You can tell he is pretty bright and has beautiful eyes. I liked Tami Faye, too. Erik Estrada played the father figure well and I loved how Vanilla thought of him as a brother. Traci seemed like a nice person, but does have a wild streak. Trishelle does drink a lot but that "intervention" by Sally Jesse Raphael rattled her. I would show Trishelle or anyone who drinks a photo of Brigitte Neilsen (season 3) who has not aged well. I was appalled how 'Gitte would drink and pass out, leaving the Dave Coultier with the work of leading the musicians through rehearsal, compete by acting like an idiot on stage, then hug those little boys on her team while dressed totally inappropriately. Now, there's someone who needs an intervention.

After watching the first three episodes of this funny, (yes actually it is pretty funny!) new WB show, I understand while Corey Feldman is no longer working in Hollywood. The plot, is pretty simple, there are seven celebrities (and I use the term "celebrities" loosely) living in a nice house somewhere in Hollywood. That's it, there is no plot, there is no elimination, or charity, or anything else. You just watch and see what stupid thing the producer's have them do next. The highlight of the show thus far, is Feldman's constant, almost maternal need for attention. Everything seems to have to focus around him, his girlfriend, his ex-girlfriends, and his new album (God help us all). While most of the others (Rocker Vince Neil, ex-playmate Brandi Rodderick, Emmanual Lewis (Webster from tv), the classic M.C Hammer) seem to take the show for what it is, a paid vacation, and a chance to have some fun. However, Feldman, along with Gabrielle Carteris, and that annoying chick from Surrvivor think that it's actually going to help jumpstart or re-start their careers. It's funny at times, but sad as well, as most of these people have had their "fifteen minutes" and they ain't gettin' them back. If you want a little nostalgia from the 80's and early 90's, and a chance to see just how far some superstars have fallen, give "Surreal Life" a chance. But you'd better hurry, because it's on the WB, so it probably won't last long. Hey, here's an idea for a sequel. Vanilla Ice, Screech (from saved by the bell) Jimmy Walker, and Elizabeth Berkley...