Gunblast

"Gunblast" looked like a worthless piece of low-budget amateur trash straight from the moment I held the dusty old VHS-copy in my hands, but I picked it up anyway, because of the name of the writer/director. Nick Millard also made "Criminally Insane" (a.k.a. "Crazy Fat Ethel") a decade before this, and that just happens to be one of the most imaginative and bonkers amateur horror-video ever accomplished. Alas, "Gunblast" is everything that "Criminally Insane" is not: hopelessly boring, uninspired, bloodless, and insufferably bottom-of-the-barrel. After half an hour of pointless non-events, like a guy aimlessly wandering around in a studio, an idiotic gunfight, and Uschi playing with her muschi in a very unsexy way, I turned it off. Life is simply too short to waste any time on rubbish like this.