Time After Time: A True Story of How One Family Found Victory over Suffering and Death in the Midst of Unusual Circumstances
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About this ebook
What price would you pay to find hope and victory in the presence of your darkest moments? Nothing brings us to our knees more than hardships or ultimately the loss of a loved one.
Pastor Denny Carr and his wife, Jan, have experienced the unspeakable: the death of their oldest child. It was through this tragic event that they discovered one profound truth: one can face, overcome, and move beyond all the pain agony, loneliness, heartbreak, hopelessness, desperation, and even death itself. Jesus Christ can move us from the darkness of despair to the light and comfort found in His presence.
This true story shows that deep down, all of us want to believe and experience the supernatural. In our present-day culture, we are starving to find inner meaning, guidance, and purpose in life. This book was written as a tool that seeks to affirm what we are all searching for. We want to embrace truth, meaning, joy, assurance, and victory in the midst of tragedy and heartache. It can all happen for you as you read Time After Time.
Pastor Denny Carr
Denny Carr is currently serving as an executive pastor at Park Place Baptist Church in Montgomery, Illinois. He earned his undergraduate degree at Judson College, Elgin, Illinois, in religion and philosophy. He received a Master of Divinity degree at McCormick Theological Seminary in Chicago. He has served in churches for over twenty-nine years. Denny and his wife, Jan, have three surviving children and five grandchildren.
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Time After Time - Pastor Denny Carr
Copyright © 2012 by Pastor Denny Carr.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
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ISBN: 978-1-4497-5695-6 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4497-5696-3 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2012911154
WestBow Press rev. date: 10/24/2012
Contents
Chapter One
Lady in Red
Chapter Two
It’s My Party and I’ll Cry if I Want To
Chapter Three
All I Need Is a Miracle
Chapter Four
Sweet Caroline
Chapter Five
I Will Follow Him
Chapter Six
Day by Day
Chapter Seven
I Can See Clearly Now
Chapter Eight
The Long and Winding Road
Chapter Nine
I’ll Be There
Chapter Ten
Lean on Me
Chapter Eleven
Just When I Needed You Most
Chapter Twelve
Having My Baby
Chapter Thirteen
That’s What Friends Are For
Chapter Fourteen
Salvation Show
Chapter Fifteen
Moments to Remember
Chapter Sixteen
Oh Happy Day
.
Epilogue
In Memory of Christine Carr
Christine was not famous in the eyes of the world. However, Chris was special to me for the simple reason that she was my first child. She was a little girl of faith and intellect. Chris never lived to see her gifts come to fruition. She died of leukemia at the age of ten and a half on March 26, 1977, at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago, Illinois. Chris’s life has left a lasting impression on family and friends who knew her story and a loving Lord who took her home with Him.
Acknowledgments
I am most grateful to family, friends, teachers, doctors, and the people from Fox Valley Presbyterian Church who in so many ways contributed to this book.
I am particularly grateful to my wife, Jan. Her profound faith and love has inspired my journey with the Lord. Her assistance in making Time After Time possible has been a blessing and great encouragement to me. God has also truly blessed me with three awesome children, Connie, Diane, and David, now grown up and with their own families, serve Jesus every day.
Several friends have added input to Time After Time. This book would not have been complete without their efforts. A special thank-you is extended to Ken and Carol Seidel for their contributions. I am also grateful to Sandy Petrille for the initial editing. My deep appreciation is also extended to Pam Weinberg for taking the time to edit the final draft. Thanks to Ken and Nancy Hennig for providing technical expertise and support. Finally, my appreciation to Lynn Metz for contributing her artistic talents on the front cover design.
Introduction
God blessed my wife, Jan, and me with a beautiful daughter on September 2, 1966. It was truly an exciting moment in our young married lives. It felt so good to say our first child
! Those of you who have experienced the birth of your first child probably had similar feelings. Our small third-floor apartment in Berwyn, Illinois, had a tiny new addition. Our lives changed dramatically when we brought home our daughter Christine. It was no longer only about us; it was also about her. We welcomed our new responsibility as parents with great enthusiasm and love.
Chris’s medical problems began at her birth. She was born with a clubfoot, which raised major concern for her young, naïve parents. She underwent surgery when she was three months old, and both of her legs were placed in casts for several months. Needless to say, seeing our little girl in those casts at the beginning of her life created some stress in our lives.
As years passed, we moved to Saint Charles, Illinois, and added two more girls, Connie and Diane, to our household. At the age of seven Chris received a diagnosis of Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago. We were devastated. How could this be? In an instant we went from taking for granted that we had all this time to watch Chris grow up to realizing she might not live more than six months. At that moment, our world took on a totally different meaning. Life was now so precious and so short! Suddenly, we were learning the importance of living one day at a time.
Time After Time is a true story of how one family came to rely on the Lord Jesus Christ through the daily trials of coping with a terminally ill child and through it all experienced His comfort, strength, and encouragement. It’s a true story of what God can do if we are open to His heart, love, hope, peace, grace, and mercy. It’s a true story of encouragement, hope, and victory for those who struggle with the illness, pain, suffering, trials, and tragedies that come with living life every day. It’s a story based on Romans 8:28, which says, And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.
Perhaps you have heard the line from one of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s poems that says Into each life some rain must fall.
Each day is not guaranteed to bring sunshine and blue skies. Unpleasant experiences filled with storm clouds and rain will come our way at some time or another. That is just the way life is.
My family and I experienced many rainy days in our daughter’s journey with leukemia. With the Lord’s help, we survived the many storms that surrounded her illness and death. We came through them all triumphantly because of the unlimited power, grace, and mercy of a loving God. Therefore, how could we not give praise and glory to Jesus throughout the pages of this book?
May you find the Lord’s blessings, power, and strength as you read the following paraphrased words from the song Bring the Rain.
Where you have pain, may you find the Lord’s peace and grace. If you have doubt and confusion, may God grant you steadfast courage to overcome. If you are tired, stressed out, and want to give up, may God give you a clear understanding and strength to press on and fight another day. If you are consumed with fear, may God fill your whole being with His unconditional love.
Bring the Rain
Words by: Holly Cheney
(Some lyrics paraphrased)
Numerous times I have been approached
About how can I praise You God in the midst
Of all my trials
My reaction just astounds me when You
Consider what could alter my relationship with You
Yes, my life has been transformed by Your presence
Before these storms have come my way
It never dawned on me to deny You, Lord
My protection from turbulence
Brings me in Your presence
I lift up my pleas to You
I ask for joy, I ask for peace
I ask for the opportunity to be released
I ask for happiness realizing there will be times of
Disappointment
Whatever pain comes my way I will give You glory
Then Lord let the rain pour down
I will be forever Yours in spite of the storms that
Hover over me
Because You can rise above all my hurts
You have provided me with a path
By enduring pain for Your purpose
Glory, Glory, Glory
Is the almighty God
Friends, this wonderful life-changing promise comes from God’s Word. He works all things for good for those who trust in His Son Jesus Christ. There is absolutely nothing we can’t conquer; we can even conquer death. God can always turn something bad into something good. This is a story of finding victory in Christ while going through many horrible experiences in the midst of a terrible tragedy. If we receive Jesus as Lord and put our undying trust in Him, we are in line with God’s will, meaning we are also called to His good purpose. The chapters in this book reveal how born-again, Spirit-filled Christians can be victorious regardless of the obstacles they face on this side of heaven.
For Christmas 2009, my wife, Jan, and I received a Christmas card from longtime friends who reside in Arizona. They wrote the following: We think of you often and remember all the fun times we had. Rock music really sends us back to memory lane when we hear those familiar golden oldies.
There is no doubt that music stirs our emotions and often takes us back in time to a nostalgic moment in our lives. For example, an old love ballad may remind you of your first love: our song.
A sad song can evoke painful moments in our lives past, present, and so on. I believe God can use even the secular to lead us to the sacred.
Throughout this book each chapter starts with a paraphrased song (a golden oldie) that has stirred a memory of how the power of the living Christ helped us through the most difficult experience a parent could ever go through: the suffering and death of a child.
The heartbreaks you might be experiencing in your life may paralyze you with fear and uncertainty about what lies ahead. However, the reality is that we can have a quiet boldness, confidence, and assurance in God’s amazing love, power, and ability to rise above it all.
However, at times it seems to get uglier before it gets better. It is exactly in those moments of extreme despair that we discover that God is not simply a temporary relief. Instead, we come to the realization that He is our eternal shelter, protection, and strength in any unfortunate situation we might find ourselves in. We just need to look God’s way and give Him a chance to Taste and see that the Lord is good! Happy is the man who takes refuge in Him!
(Psalm 34:8). The pages of Time After Time are filled with this profound truth.
Whatever you are going through, may you find the blessings of God and victory in Christ as you read Time After Time.
If God’s truth is rejected, then living a life of confusion can be expected.
Lady in Red
Words by: Chris de Burgh
(Some lyrics paraphrased)
She looked so lovely her eyes sparkling,
As she moved across the dance floor.
While we danced it was as if there was only the two of us.
I was caught up in her presence
The way she looked on that dance floor was unforgettable.
Even though we just met I fell in love
With the smile on this beautiful girl’s face.
I did not want to be with anyone else but this lady in red.
CHAPTER ONE
Lady in Red
Background
The song "Lady in Red" although popular in the 80’s, takes me back to a weekend dance on the Wisconsin State University–Whitewater campus in the fall of 1964. This was a fuzzy stage in my life. I was a loose and carefree freshman just trying to find my way. It was safe to say my major that semester was partying with my buddies. The only nondrinker in our group was Mike Murray from Hales Corners, Wisconsin. Mike was our designated driver even before that title became common several years later. For most of the guys, being able to drink beer legally even though we weren’t yet twenty-one was probably the best thing outside of coeds on campus. At the time, the legal age for drinking beer in Wisconsin was eighteen.
Don’t Tie Me Down
I had just come out of a relationship and had no intention of getting involved in another one. For me, it was all about being free without commitment. That was my new motto.
The dances at Whitewater were a blast, and my buddy Mike taught me the finer points of dancing. I was no John Travolta, but I got by. The bands at our dances were very good and played the latest rock songs. The most popular song on campus in the fall of ’64 was Roy Orbison’s Pretty Woman.
I couldn’t count the number of times I heard that song on the radio or sung by one of the local bands.
I’ve Gotta Be Me
I believed this was truly a good season in my young life. I was thoroughly enjoying my social environment. My academics, however, were another story. If you were to ask me at the time, I would have told you my priorities were in the right order. Since my earlier years had been filled with a number of personal tragedies I don’t want to go into here, I thought I was entitled to have some fun without major worries. I was at the right place at the right time. My close college friends came from stable homes and strong Catholic backgrounds. It didn’t matter how late we were out partying on Saturday night; the guys always attended Mass the following morning. I could never really understand why. Nevertheless, deep in my heart and mind, I always respected their commitment to church.
A Victim of Deception
At this point in my life, the only thing that mattered was having a good time. I could not have cared less about my responsibility as a student. I didn’t even respect the fact that I had worked hard to save money so I could attend Whitewater in the first place. In college, I looked forward to happy hour. I majored in beer and partying. The sobering truth was that I had flushed all my hard-earned money down the toilet. I ignored the very purpose for going to college and pursuing an education. I wasn’t blowing Mommy’s or Daddy’s money, but my money! There was no doubt that at the time, I was a bit twisted and deceived. Some might say, Hey, no big deal; many young, unmotivated students have done the same thing.
However, once I became a born-again Christian, I viewed those out-of-control days quite differently.
Get Out of My Face
I was deceived by the trickery of Satan, and I didn’t recognize his deception. Satan was cutting my spiritual jugular vein through temptation. He was whispering in my ear, saying, Go have your fun; you deserve it. Besides, it’s your money. What good is living life if you don’t have a little harmless fun once in a while?
A person can have fun and be responsible, but having fun and acting irresponsible in the process is different.
This is the evil one’s trap. In the Bible, Peter wrote, Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour
(1 Peter 5:8).
On Guard
Satan does not play favorites; he does not discriminate. All of us are his fair game. Peter issued a warning to all Christians—be on your guard, be watchful, take control, and be alert. Often, many in the faith let down their spiritual guards and give Satan an opportunity to manipulate them. Following Jesus every day keeps the Devil at bay. The good news is that we can overcome his attacks by being attentive, fixing our eyes on Jesus, and putting our faith and trust in Him alone.
Let’s Dance
One of the fall dances held at the student center started out like any other dance my buddies and I attended that wild semester. It all changed in a heartbeat when the lady in a red dress caught my eye. When I laid my eyes on this lady in red, she really got my attention. I watched her on the dance floor. My friends urged me to go ask her for a dance. It didn’t take a whole lot of convincing on their part before I approached this girl in red and asked if she wanted to dance. I will never forget her smile; her face just glowed. I must be honest; the chemistry was there right from the beginning.
Getting to Know You
For the next