Why Paul Ferroll Killed his Wife

I

A long gallery opening on each side to small rooms gave the inhabitants of St. Cécile’s Monastery access both to them and to the larger apartment which was inhabited by the Reverend Mother herself. This latter room was of an oblong shape, very bare of furniture, and of all kinds of decoration. The windows were without curtains; there was but one table, and on it stood a crucifix. Two benches by the wall were all the accommodation for sitting down. The one figure which occupied the chamber required not even so much, for she was kneeling in the middle of the floor, with support of no kind, and quite upright, except her head, which was bowed under the thick cloth or veil hanging over it, and which concealed even her hands.

She is praying, said a nun, looking into the room, you had better wait; and these words she addressed to a young girl who accompanied her, in the ordinary tone of conversation, such as befitted the occupations of the place.

The young girl advanced into the room, and herself went down on her knees at a little distance from the Superior, running over her beads while she waited till she might speak. She was very simply dressed in white, with parted hair, like a child, but abundant and beautiful, falling low on low shoulders and delicately rounded waist. Her face was fair, with very little colour, and the eyes, which she raised often, while she slid her beads through her fingers, had a simplicity of religious expression, such as fades even in those happy enough once to possess it, when the habits of a pious childhood come to be contradicted by those of the general world.

When the Superior rose from her knees, so did Elinor, and advanced towards the elder lady, who kissed her on the forehead, and gave a blessing. The conversation was in French, though the girl was English, for it was in a Convent of Brittany that the scene took place. It did not begin in the tone supposed to be exclusively that of Lady Abbesses.

Has Louisa finished the marking of all your shifts, my dear? Are they ready?

Yes, dear Mother, and packed up, said Elinor.

And have you heard whether Madame Néotte is come.

Yes, that is what I came here to tell you, as you desired.

Then to-morrow you leave us, said the Superior, in a melancholy voice.

It is you who have determined it, said Elinor.

Ah, my child! your guardian believes it best; it is his doing.

And I shall come back, said the girl.

No, dear, you will never do that. I know your feelings better than you do. It will be a hard parting with us all, but when you are away you will be glad. You will enjoy the world, you will choose it, and you will be welcome in it. No; you will never wish to come back here. I have known many gentle girls like you, who could not find what they wanted here. They require to be carried along—not to walk alone, as in a convent.

Am I one of those, said Elinor, catching hold of the Abbess’s hand and passionately kissing it; I who have been so happy?

And have made us all happy—but you must go. Sit down a little while, let us talk for the last time. The world is full of snares, my dear.

What are they? said Elinor. What will they tempt me to do?

Vanity, the pride of life, the lusts of the devil, answered the Superior. You must be prepared for all. Some will pretend that you have beauty; some will praise your voice, as if you were a musician; some will talk to you of the world—and all, all for their own bad ends.

What are those ends? asked Elinor, again.

The Abbess, was a little puzzled. Man, said she, solemnly, is a creature going about to devour. Listen not to him, go not near him, keep him far from you. He will hurt you, he will destroy you; you have already learned this; now is your time to practise. Keep your eyes from his face, keep your speech from his commerce. One day it may come to pass that your guardian may select one who is to be your husband. Then submit yourself to the will of your superiors, and adopt the state of life which shall be allotted you; but till such a fate is brought to your door, remember that a maiden must keep her finger on her lips and her heart full of thoughts holy and virtuous, avoiding the very shadow of sin.

Elinor was set thinking what these sins could be; but she resolved, at all events, to do right, and to keep the precepts of her early friend in her memory.

She continued talking with the Reverend Mother as long as convent duties permitted; then, for the last time, partook the Evening Service and assisted to make the vesper beautiful by her exquisite voice, against the world’s estimation of which the Superior thought she had successfully warned her.

She rose that night for Vigils; and next morning was up at Matins—the last time of doing these duties making them seem to her as if she would fain never cease to do them; and when the hour for her journey arrived, the wrench of the first roots she had ever struck in hearts and places, overwhelmed her with a girlish sorrow, which, fortunately, was not put to such proof as an offer to remove it would have been; for there is no saying how her wish to remain in the Convent would have been modified, if the chaise into which she so sobbingly stepped had been ordered back into its old remise.

II

On the English side of the Channel, which our heroine was about to cross, a different scene was passing in the early life of one of the opposite sex.

A young man, four years older than Elinor (who was just seventeen), had passed that summer a triumphant Examination at Oxford, and heaped on himself every honour which it was possible for its young members to obtain. He had been accustomed to success ever since he became a school-boy; and he was so far from satiated by it, that he already looked upon all his achievements as mere marks of past progress, and on himself as now about to begin the career which contained objects really worthy of his ambition.

He was an orphan, never acquainted with father or mother; wholly unconscious of tender influences on his boyhood, and of domestic sympathy with his successes and desires. He had come not to want them; disappointment he had not had, and the hard measure of public applause suited him better than the fond exaggerations of home, to which he had not grown up, nor been bettered by them. Life was a fine, hard reality to him; he knew it, for evil and good, and while he destroyed every illusion as fast as they courted him, he looked keenly to its enjoyments and rated them by the vast power of pleasure within him which he shared with most healthy and active human beings.

He was passing some weeks at a country house, where his late very hard work gave zest to the summer repose in which the old place lay buried. Long, solitary, morning walks in the heavenly beauty of a hot July did his thinking faculties good, after their late stretch upon other men’s thoughts. The society of well educated women, their music, their vivacity, their fancies; the riding parties, the evenings when there was dancing, or the garden by moonlight, and the pleasure of pretending to feelings, and, as it were, acting them, for they were no better to him than a play, these things suited him for a little while, till the moment should come for executing the projects in his head which would drive all the present scene far away.

He had everything to recommend him to the world. A fine person, full of health and strength, a fortune and a place which were competent to ordinary wishes, and had been augmented by all the savings of a well managed minority; a high reputation for ability; and natural claims on certain great names for assistance in entering on his career. His manner was more taking than winning, he took hold on society as if it were his due place, and his admirable tact made him hold it gracefully, and to the delight of his companions.

These qualities and advantages had made a strong impression on the fancy of the young lady who presided over the house. She was the owner’s sister, a few years older than my hero (whom I will call Leslie, though I do not assert that such was indeed his name); she was handsome, rich, and hitherto courted by all whom she had a mind should do so. But it was not so with her present guest; he often seemed on the brink of fascination, and then, like Sampson, burst the withies like burnt flax and was as free as ever. The irritation of this state of things was excessive; she longed to break through the feminine restraints which bound her, and ask him if indeed he cared for her or not. The absolute impossibility of thus setting herself free was a galling chain, for ever working on the wounded place; and the necessity of a smiling face, and disengaged manner, at times when she was fretting at her heart’s core, acquainted her with a torment which the daughters of Eve sometimes heavily endure.

Let us ride this afternoon, she said, one hot but cloudy day; the air of the house burns one.

With all my heart, said Leslie; but we shall have a storm.

I am not afraid, said Laura.

Would I were quite sure that, in fact, you have no fears!

Oh! I would tell them. I am very frank, I hate concealment. It is very hard on women that they are required to be liars and deceivers.

But that’s not the case, said Leslie, what is so delightful to a man as a frank, open nature which prints its thoughts as fast as they come into the mind.

So you say, but you know it is not so—at least, not unless a woman has no thought whatever, except the price of a dress or the hope of a ball.

Oh, that would not pay the expense of printing or reading either, said Leslie; but what has this to do with your first plan of riding? Shall we go?

Yes; Mrs. Axross, you will ride? and Captain Bertham—ring; the horses are ready in case we should want them. Come and put on your habit.

When they got on horseback, Leslie perversely kept with Mrs. Axross, a timid horsewoman, and in consequence of being occupied with genuine fear, a rather dull companion. They fell behind the others, whose horses stepped out freely under lightly held bits, nor did Miss Chanson know how to alter the order of their progress. When she contrived, under pretence of pointing out a view, or a remarkable tree, to get back to the loiterers, she still found that Leslie adhered to his first companion, and suffered her again to get before him.

How I hate a horse that can’t walk, she said, at last, impatiently striking her own, which bounded at the unjust assault and tossed his head angrily.

Well, then let us gallop, said Leslie, laughing, for he read her heart exactly. My companion, he added, as they went off, thinks only of keeping her seat. When she gets home safe, she will have fulfilled the sole purpose of riding out.

Well, I’m better than that, said Laura, her spirits rising instantly, I can enjoy all when there is anything to enjoy—but Captain Bertham is so stupid.

Leslie laughed again, for he knew that Captain Bertham did not deserve a reproach of which he felt himself to be the indirect cause.

How can anyone be dull with you for a companion, said he, again, as they increased their pace and went gaily along. Laura was pleased, she did not consider that she had provoked the compliment, and that it is only voluntary attentions from a man that tell.

Here come the great raindrops, said Leslie, as the first of the storm fell one by one.

Oh, no! it is only the last of a shower. See, it is blowing over.

I don’t see it at all, but if you order me to see it, I will.

I do, then, said Laura, gaily; so let us go on.

Was that lightning or not? said Leslie, as a flash startled their horses, and thunder rolled at a distance.

It was not, said Laura; come on.

On, on, to the end of the world under your guidance.

But now the rain at once arrived and poured upon them.

What will Mrs. Axross do, said Laura, laughing; she will walk her horse all the way home, for fear he should jump at the storm. We must turn back and look for them.

Leslie rather wondered she should do so, instead of profiting by her present tête-à-tête with him; but presently he understood the manoeuvre. When they came to a cross road, she examined the footmarks on the road, and declared it was most extraordinary, but certainly their companions had gone the wrong way.

They will get lost in the wood, she said; and what will Mr. Axross say, if we go home without his wife? Let us canter up here and set them right. We shall overtake them in a minute.

You will be wet through, said Leslie. No, no, canter home!

I don’t care; go home if you like.

No, I am yours, to the very skin, said Leslie, venturing on a brutality.

Miss Chanson did not look angry, and on they went, away from home. Presently a little farmhouse appeared in sight.

They have taken shelter there, said the lady, no doubt. Come, let us see if they are to be found; and arriving at the door, she jumped from her horse, saying to the farmer, who came out at the sound of horses, My friends are here, are not they? Come, Mr. Leslie.

He followed, after first putting the horses into the stable, and giving them over to the care of the farmer’s boy, and found, his companion standing before the kitchen fire, her hat off, her hair let down to dry, and her habit open.

The weather is too bad to stay in, is not it? she said, as he came in. Let us wait till the storm goes by; and she pulled her dress together.

A lucky storm for me, said Leslie, glancing at her disarranged toilette. Why are these lovely tresses locked up in ribbon and garlands—not always thus delightfully visible?

Laura affected embarrassment, and hastily twisted them in her hands, but yielded to slight impulse from Leslie to release them. Finally she placed herself in a very picturesque attitude on what is called the settle, by the fire, and Leslie carried on briskly the conversation she affected.

All this time, said he, at last, when the flirtation became a little wearisome, what is become of Mrs. Axross?

I had almost forgotten her, said Laura, softly, with a smothered sigh.

I had quite done so, said Leslie, sighing also.

Only you recollected her, said Laura, a little reproachfully.

Nay, the storm is over. It is getting late. I would not have you catch cold for the world—I would not be responsible for the anxiety your absence will create—I would not have you exposed to further rain—I would…

Get home in time for dinner, interrupted Laura, very impatiently. Then checking herself, she added, as gaily as she could, which would be an excellent thing, for I am very hungry.

Then heaven forbid you should wait! said Leslie. I’ll fetch the horses in a moment.

Accordingly he went himself to the stable, and forgot to lament the loss of the beautiful curls, which were twisted under the hat when he came back; and placing Laura on her horse, they rode home together, the lady feeling in herself that hollowness in her satisfaction which comes when the foundation of a very gay and promising structure wants perfect solidity.

How very handsome he is, she said to herself, as she ran up the house-steps; how agreeable—and I don’t feel sure he will make himself agreeable next time—that makes one curious to be with him again.

The butler stopped her in the hall, and said, Miss Elinor Ladylift was arrived.

Ha! our little nun, said she, turning back to Mr. Leslie; we did not expect her till to-morrow. Come and see her.

He followed her into the room, and saw standing by the table a young figure, perfectly enveloped in a gray cloak, while a veil