A Year of Going Nowhere
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About this ebook
A Year of Going Nowhere started life as a blog about life lived in lockdown on a small farm in West Wales. Simone combines thoughts, observations and poems in a in a quietly positive series of ‘journal’ entries. These mark the personal and domestic happenings of her year, observations about history, grief, anxiety and writing, against the backdrop of extraordinary world and UK events, the changing seasons and the changing landscape. Over the months of the pandemic her concerns and priorities shift and re-align.
Simone Mansell Broome
I have lived, since 2007, on a small farm in West Wales, where I jointly run a thriving family business with sustainability and community values at its core. It operates as a centre for ‘alternative’ weddings, for holidays – especially glamping holidays, for a variety of workshops and courses and as a ‘pop-up restaurant’. ‘Thriving’ of course doesn’t really apply right now – as we’ve been ‘locked down’ for most of the last year!I studied English with American Studies at Sussex University, qualified both as a teacher of Speech and Drama and of EFL and taught privately, and at secondary and further education levels. After leaving teaching, I worked in business, but my twin passions have always been the written and the spoken word. Page and stage!Over the last sixteen years, I’ve rediscovered my love of writing - chairing a local writers’ group, being a member of two others, co-hosting a monthly spoken word night, Word Up, in Cardigan, reading my work aloud at venues and festivals in England, Wales and Ireland, taking part in poetry slams and dramatic performances, winning & being placed in a number of poetry competitions and representing Wales in a Radio 4 spoken word competition in 2010.I’ve been recorded on Poetcasting and my poems have been read on BBC’s ‘Poetry Please’, ITV (in 2018 & 2020), 101.8WCRFM and Radio Wales. I’m a member of Second Light network & have poems on the ‘poetrypf’ website. Fifty of my poems were translated into Romanian in 2020 as part of a Bucharest University M.A. dissertation. I’ve been commissioned to write poems by ITV and by a local theatre group. I wrote a blog during lockdown, which formed the basis of ‘A Year of Going Nowhere’. I’m currently editing my first children’s book, about a clan of mice called the Stowaways.
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A Year of Going Nowhere - Simone Mansell Broome
You almost didn’t make it, just out of view
of the humans who sat, chatting, downing
cups of tea, amused by a clowning puddle of pups,
tussling and tumbling on new Spring grass.
You scrambled up a ramshackle pile of bricks,
stacked against a plastic butt, and somehow must
have toppled in.
Alarmed by sounds of splashing, we found you
doggie-paddling in blissful unschooled circles, ears
dipping, skimming then skirting the murky surface.
You learned fast – this first watery mishap
transformed into a story, your story –
the discovery of the aqueous element
you made your own.
Adventures in, on, across, through water
populate our memories of you. Your chest built
for swimming, ears spread wide, steady, bubbly breathing:
your pelt liquified. Sometimes we’d panic, light failing,
scanning the horizon or bank, and no dog visible.
Would you get washed away, tire and drown
or simply carry on,
forget to turn, your easy strokes pulling you
out into the Irish Sea,
the sunset,
West?
Born to Race
Technically, this was before lockdown but Covid-19 was the reason this year’s Cheltenham Festival almost didn’t go ahead. I was asked to write a poem for ITV for the start of the Cheltenham Gold Cup race in 2020. The poem which was broadcast on March 13th was a lot shorter than my original but…
Poem: Born to Race
He's not her first, won't be her last, bred
as he's been to be fast, jump, run, race.
Your heart-rate's halved and falling; it may go lower still.
Eleven moons of growing. Soon. Not long to wait. Fluid,
skin and bones, jumbled bundle of limbs with oversized head,
yet with your first breath, your stumbling steps, the stuff
of old schemes, new dreams gets made flesh.
Feed, hunker down with me, stabled, warm. Time enough
to feel long days of sun on cropped paddock extend,
stretch your legs, run just for the joy of it. They chose me;
chose your sire. A good strong start. Already. Excited,
reined-in hopes chart your progress, contrails
across a racing sky...
Is winning born or winning grown? When are the seeds
of triumph sown, for nothing is knowable until it's known?
Then the sales; sold to new owner; stable, yard; playmates,
and the slow, steady tasks of schooling. Of course it's hard,
but you're keen, bold, brave, making strong bonds
with your trainer, mastering hurdles then jumps. Race
in a 'bumper. Win. Win again, while expectations build.
Al Boum Photo, Kauto Star, Arkle,
Best Mate, Cottage Rake, and no snail - L'Escargot...
Will his name be breathed in the same breath as all those stars
since 1924, Gold Cup winners - alchemic blends of destiny, class,
hard graft, the going on the day?
They'll talk times, assess your form. Bone over blood over bone?
Or is it heart? You have skills, will: have known the thrill
of winning. They'll talk success - hope for more. Breaths held,
as you step out at Cheltenham. Not here as a mere hoofnote
in the jump race halls of fame. Trained and taught for now;
as the tapes lift, the race starts. Make history today!
You're not my first, won't be my last.
You were born to run. You may be my best!
Faradiddle – what a firkin!
Yesterday, mid-afternoon, the incident of note was a minor explosion. It must have been about four p.m., and I didn’t actually hear it. The conservatory where I was sitting, writing lists, is across the other side of the farmyard from our little rustic bar. More of a phut than a bang then.
‘Y Bar Bach’ is of course not currently graced by punters, but the door to the bar also leads to our laundry area, so when I unlocked to take a pile of washing out of one of the two machines, I was met by an unmistakable smell – earthy and sweet. The floor was sticky, in parts treacly; the plug was absent and there was a slight dusting of scum on the top of the last plastic firkin of local beer delivered before lockdown. I wiped it, revealing the label – ‘Amber Ale, 4.0%, duty paid on 39.35 litres.’
My immediate thought was that it was gone, wasted, useless, yet another casualty of the current chaos. And then I wondered if 39 or so litres could be poured onto the compost heap, or could I hive a little off first for some sort of smelly hair treatment? But two of the menfolk appeared and a pint glass was found to test it. ‘Absolutely fine’ said my son-in-law, who knows a thing or two about beer. ‘But it won’t keep. It’ll be spoilt within twenty-four hours.’ What a shame.
I needn’t have concerned myself. The firkin was propped on its side on the wall by the farm gate, next to a charity pot and a packet of disinfectant wipes. One-by-one the husband, son and son-in-law, plus a few locals from the hamlet, (meticulously observing hygiene and social distancing rules), turned up with bottles, jugs, flagons and buckets. Within forty-five minutes, it was emptied.
Not everything that happens in lockdown is grim. There are occasional serendipitous plusses.
On grooming…
I’m thinking I’ll be scruffier when this is over. Due to Covid-19, perhaps, the hairdressing salon in the village, (let’s call it ‘Scissors’), is closed. For ever. The cutting is not the issue. My daughter-in-law has said she’ll give me a trim, sort out my fringe before it becomes a health and safety issue – I will trade with her so no problem there. But am I going grey? For ever. Will I let myself? Or will I grasp an alternative out of the bag, a hair dye bunny out of the hat? I’d have to order it online and I’d need an accomplice.
Will I embrace purple, or is that too obvious?
I’m thinking I’ll be scruffier when this is over. There’s a suggestion, more than a suggestion of can’t- be-arsed right now. Why file my nails or pluck my brows? Who’s there to see my efforts? Why bother? I shaved my legs for the first time in weeks and thought – what’s the point? We’re banned from beaches and pools are closed. Short, summery skirts are not practical attire for breezy, brambly smallholdings. I’ll leave my lilywhite limbs unexposed. Thighs can be rediscovered another day. Or not.
I’m thinking I’ll be scruffier, contentedly scruffier, when this is over.
Cheating, scandal and milking the media
We’ve just been watching ‘Quiz’, a drama based on true events – the supposed cheating , mostly in the form of strategically placed coughs, which enabled someone, a Major Ingram, to win a million pounds in a TV quiz show Over three nights the story unfolded of the build-up to the contest appearance of Major Ingram, his win and the subsequent investigation, persecution, trial and conviction of the contestant, his wife and a co-conspirator, ( a man with a tickly throat irritation).
This furore dominated the papers and TV – headlines, gossip and editorial – late in 2001 and beyond. The flames of public interest were fanned further by an ITV documentary about the scandal.
What struck me, and the husband, yesterday evening was that this story wasn’t even glimpsed on our radar at the time. In September 2001 we were staying at the airport in Atlanta when the Twin Towers were hit. There was a brief lockdown and our return to the UK was delayed. In the following weeks and months we were totally focussed on trying to deal with the dramatic downturn in the fortunes of our little airline-related business.
Did they do it, and does it matter were questions we didn’t consider, until last night
I won’t underline any parallels but here is a poem I wrote called 12th September
.
Poem: 12th September.
And the morning after was unlike
mornings after - the world changed
utterly. And the world, or rather,
that small slice of world, the Marriott
airport hotel, was struck by
silence, by empty skies. Suddenly
there were stars, not haze or engine roar,
and we railed against blueness,
feeling caged by an infinity
which inconvenienced us, an act
of terror, like an act of
God, forcing us to juggle diaries,
put commerce on hold: and outside the
spinning doors, conspiracies
of bellboys, touts already selling
those Godblessamerica tee shirts.
No Visitors
This Easter no cars pulled up filled with hot, tired children and pooches, with couples who’d had words about directions, with tales of nose-to-tail M4 jams. This Easter there were no visitors to greet, meet, feed, water, talk to, say farewell to.
There were no visitors.
This Easter no one came to ask for an extra key, more logs, or kindling, matches or firelighters. This Easter no one needed directions, or a restaurant booking, or a taxi. There were no visitors.
This Easter there were no recommendations sought for pubs, beaches, places to walk. This Easter no one asked for the hot tub, or an extra blanket, or BBQ coals or a plaster. There were no visitors.
This Easter the children still hunted for clues, but by themselves. This Easter the only cooking smells were our cooking smells. This Easter the only noise from children was from our children.
This Easter there was still chocolate and over-indulgence; the children feasted stickily. This Easter we were favoured with fine weather and good